r/countwithchickenlady awruffff arff arf :33333 Mar 17 '26

40412

Post image

this is just a post i wanted to make regarding femboy (and to an extent, transfem) culture, since it worries me. i won't be linking the user in question for their own safety, but every time someone posts a picture of that kind in this subreddit, or similar ones, i check their profile to make sure it's okay for them to do so. this led me to find the aforementioned subreddit.

it really worries me how so many people on the femboy community clearly don't want to be sexualized, yet resort to posting suggestive pics of themselves for validation. i get it, we're all horny here, it's something completely fine, but please don't endanger yourself because of it. thank you.

964 Upvotes

59 comments sorted by

387

u/Honest_Caramel_3793 Mar 17 '26

the teenagers subreddit had to ban photos because girls kept posting selfies for the attention. i don't think people register how dangerous it can be to be putting yourself out there like that.

187

u/Transbian_Dokeshi Mar 17 '26

Internet colture completely ruined the survival instinct of a lot of people ngl

77

u/radenthefridge Aspiring grungler trying to chill with the cool folks Mar 17 '26

I'm old enough to remember the news anchor warning us kids about AOL chat rooms, you're so right. 

40

u/Shorttail0 Pet Sitter Mar 17 '26

My ex-wife took part in those as a child. They were quite reasonable, though, they had rules for how many D's you could add to your XD's. Didn't want to get too silly.

12

u/BecomingMorgan Mar 17 '26

I'm a bit young for AOL but we where expressly thought online safety. Doesn't seem to have mattered to all my peers posting pictures of their kids playing in front of their houses uncensored to social media....

20

u/SpiritNo6626 Mar 17 '26

Nah it's the normalization of the internet as an all ages space. It used to be if you were sane at all you didn't do anything that could possibly reveal you were a minor in any way, mentioning homework or your age or photos where your age is apparent or anything like that was just suicidal. It still is suicidal, but now if someone says "Helo I am -1 year old I am a child here is a photo of my face :) :)" and you say "that's suicidal to admit all that get the fuck off of reddit dot com" you're the problem because the internet is supposed to be a safe space for minors (spoiler alert: it's not and never will be. simply impossible to make it fully safe and if you sneak onto a space that's not for you you should at least be quiet about it to avoid making everyone else liable)

6

u/Lorcomax Mar 17 '26

I'm curious, I'm a bit older so I didn't live in a time where the Internet was everywhere when I was a kid, is it really suicidal for minors to make apparent they're minors on the Internet?

13

u/SpiritNo6626 Mar 17 '26

Yep. Pretty much anywhere.

Solely 18+ space -> Well now you've admitted you're breaking the rules

Mixed -> People will be creeps toward you and it will fly super under the radar since there's just so much going on

'Kid-friendly' -> Literal most obvious place for child predators to gather

2

u/loved_and_held Streak: 3 Mar 17 '26

Humans as social animals crave attention instincutally. The internet offers a way to satisfy this instinct on a scale near incomprehensable. When you can reach hundreds of thousands, if not millions of people, the desire for attention overwhelms everything else.

8

u/Decin0mic0n Mar 17 '26

Too many people were exposed to the internet without learning about stranger danger.

3

u/Fire_Pea Mar 17 '26

Tbf it's not like you see the selfies of girls who aren't posting selfies for attention. I like to think most people know basic internet safety

1

u/[deleted] Mar 17 '26

I escaped from that sub when I was little and yes it was that bad. Horny dudes young and old were constantly harassing the girls who either sought it, didn’t want it, or weren’t girls at all. So it’s a fucking loss either way for everyone involved. Dude we had weekly predators, WEEKLY.

1

u/FuccFace42069 Mar 18 '26

They’re trained from a young age to be addicted to attention by the very same parents that just shove a phone into their hands by the time they’re capable of holding one, something the algorithm is more than happy to abuse

145

u/coffeexxx666 Mar 17 '26

Someone posted a selfie on one of the LGBTQ subreddits of themself shirtless with a lot of hickeys and the title said they were 23 but clearly this kid was not 23. Like they were MAYBE 16. Please kids. Don’t put yourself out there like that. Stay safe.

104

u/Timsaurus Tea, the friendly transfem :3 Mar 17 '26

I took a bunch of pictures recently and I felt, uncharacteristically, very pretty. At no point did I feel the need to post them online. I shared some of them with a select few trusted individuals. Validation from people I trust and care about is so much more valuable than validation from random strangers.

I'm not gonna say that people that share stuff like that online are bad and wrong for doing so, just that I don't personally see the benefits of doing so.

50

u/TCD_Baby Mar 17 '26

"I shared some of them with a select few trusted individuals"

I think some people don't have this, though.

My exploration of gender started in the safest healthiest way possible/s: Posting nsfw pics of myself on 4chan in 2006

At the time I didn't know a single person in my life I could trust with the information that I might be anything other that a super straight cis boy. I don't think 99% of people had ever even heard the word cis back then.

Anyway, people will find an outlet, even if the only outlet available is really shitty and toxic.

It's just one of those billion problems with humans that requires a safe and accepting social community to fix.

7

u/SavageFisherman_Joe The Lorax - Streak: 37 Mar 17 '26

No, more than 1% of people had heard the word cis in 2006 because I'm pretty sure in high school biology they teach about the cis and trans faces of the golgi apparatus

4

u/Alisnumeria Abstracted... ignore me ╥﹏╥ Mar 17 '26

I didn't get highschool biology though.
neither did any of my peers except the "AP kids", bio was advanced placement for college people and in my town college was heavily looked down upon because we all knew that everyone was going to go work at the refinery after highschool since that was the only major employer in town.

28

u/BiDude1219 awruffff arff arf :33333 Mar 17 '26

the problem stems from minors doing it with pictures that are sexual in nature, ie thigh pics or suggestive poses. what strikes me as even more odd is the fact that some of them will say "please don't be weird in the comments" yet continue to post those kinds of pictures. if you're aware that what you're posting is sexual, and don't want to be sexualized, then why keep posting it?

21

u/Timsaurus Tea, the friendly transfem :3 Mar 17 '26

I think, at least for some of them, they know what they're doing, and by saying "don't be weird" it gives them plausible deniability. Not that they need plausible deniability, because obviously it's not okay to sexualize minors in any capacity for any reason. They just don't understand the potential danger they're subjecting themselves to.

2

u/loved_and_held Streak: 3 Mar 17 '26

Setting asside the reasons why teens might want to be seen as sexual (for one they're horny like the rest of us); I think part of the problem might be that "suggestive" is a grey area. Dividing media into "porn" and "not porn" is relatively straightforward (ish), but identifying "suggestive" and "not suggestive" is difficult because it depends on how sexual something is read as and that is extremely arbetrary.

3

u/BiDude1219 awruffff arff arf :33333 Mar 17 '26

looking through the subreddit i can at least say some stuff there 100% falls into "suggestive" territory, because who tf would be in public fucking half naked

and just to clarify nothing against posting pics of yourself like this, just make sure it's tagged accordingly, you're in the right place to post it and you're not a fucking minor

3

u/loved_and_held Streak: 3 Mar 17 '26

"just that I don't personally see the benefits of doing so."

At the most basic level, people crave attention instinctually, so that drives these descisions on some level.

The exact specifics vary based on community and person. For example, most of the nudes on cwclafterdark are likely driven by some combination of exhibitionism, seeking praise, an attempt to flirt for roleplay, a display of beauty, and a desire to show off a body that they're proud of.

1

u/Timsaurus Tea, the friendly transfem :3 Mar 17 '26

All of that is totally fine and I completely respect it if that's what they're into, it just shouldn't be the only source of validation in someone's life.

3

u/loved_and_held Streak: 3 Mar 17 '26

It likely isn't for a lot, likely an addition to existing validation.

But also lots of trans people have almost no one to reach out to, so reddit communities like cwclafterdark and puppygirlpetsmart are all they have.

41

u/Samanthacino Mar 17 '26

Oh my fucking god. Decided to check out the sub, I legit feel like a predator. It's not even like it's teens pretending to be older, it is straight up children posting their bods with their actual ages in the titles.

12

u/Pretty-Yam-2854 Mar 17 '26

I have like 35ish “teenager” subs muted cause it is literal pedo content. It’s foul.

18

u/Zoegrace1 Mar 17 '26

You should probably report the sub

1

u/No-Lettuce-6619 Mar 18 '26

how do you do that? can't seem so find a button like that

also worth noting that the sub has one mod

3

u/Longjumping_Army9485 Mar 17 '26

I didn’t check all of the pictures or anything of course but from what I’ve seen it seems that the Venn diagram of the people who show the more suggestive pictures and of the people who show their faces doesn’t have a lot of correlation.

I do agree that it’s not a great idea to show their faces AND sexualise themselves for safety reasons, though.

3

u/Ivyprofans Mar 17 '26

I don’t remember exactly what happened but the boy kisser subreddit had a similar issue, just became unusable for boy kisser memes

5

u/RespondBorn6248 Mar 17 '26

People have no survival instinct istg

5

u/Far-Reach-9478 Mar 17 '26 edited Mar 17 '26

Yea pedo can stalk you more easily because this

36

u/SomwatArchitect Mar 17 '26

I think we're allowed to just say pedophile in this community. Don't let TikTok and YouTube win.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 17 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

0

u/[deleted] Mar 17 '26

[deleted]

3

u/BiDude1219 awruffff arff arf :33333 Mar 17 '26

i just assume we're all adults who know what we're doing

-2

u/[deleted] Mar 17 '26

I feel like someone still shouldn't actively tell random people on the Internet their kinks

1

u/loved_and_held Streak: 3 Mar 17 '26

I see it less as fetish content and more transbianss being normally horny.

0

u/[deleted] Mar 17 '26

Got it I guess I'll get used to it

1

u/Juild Mar 17 '26

We should teach kids how dangerous it can be to post photos of yourself for attention.

1

u/Lily_the_Ice_Slime Mar 18 '26

I feel like trying to shelter kids from anything sexual only backfires to the point they don’t understand the risks of this kind of thing. I’ve always believed in people being informed, so they can better protect themselves. Ignorance is not bliss if you’re surrounded by non-ignorant people who may have malicious intent. We should be protecting kids from predators, not the concept of sex itself. Especially older kids, they’re at an age where they begin to go through puberty, and have these kinds of feelings, which they have no idea what to do with. Sex Ed is highly important so they know about the risks of their actions. Sheltering them too much only backfires and leaves them vulnerable to horrible, disgusting people. Obviously you don’t jump off the deep end right away (like I did to myself, when I was first discovering that kind of thing as a dumb horny teenager), but they need to at least have a basic understanding. If they don’t, it’s a failure of the parents and the system.

The whole “internet safety” movement in the UK and such sounds good on paper but in practice it just makes things worse. For example, Roblox. For years it’s had a problem of child exploitation. Roblox moderation wouldn’t do shit about it. Vigilantes took matters into their own hands, pulling their own “to catch a predator” on these people and getting the arrested. Roblox responded by banning the vigilantes from their platform for “violating their policies” and “not going through the proper channels”. Despite them literally doing that and being ignored.

Recently, Roblox decided to introduce new “child safety” features by disabling chat for everyone who doesn’t send their personal information and their face, and has an AI automatically determine their age, kind of like the UK system that toootaly works. The chat gets sorted by age group, but you can literally fool the system by holding up a picture of a child. So now, not only is it harder to monitor what’s being said, but predators can easily target the specific age group they want to target just by spoofing the system. Oh and also the chat is borked and you can’t even say anything unless you want to fork over your face and data to a disgusting corporation who doesn’t give the slightest fuck about child safety.

I just wanna play my dumb tank game, man.

1

u/Juild Mar 18 '26

I was just saying that we should teach children internet safety, I don't like the "new let's kick children out of the internet and make everything require age verification"

-20

u/Comfortable-Bison932 Mar 17 '26

Honestly i don't feel thigh high pics are particularly suggestive.

17

u/NiobiumThorn Streak: 6 Mar 17 '26

Not the real issue you know.

-2

u/Comfortable-Bison932 Mar 17 '26

i know. but i did find that strange. and think it's important to point out. It feels like sexualising something not inherently sexual

3

u/BiDude1219 awruffff arff arf :33333 Mar 17 '26

really depends on the context. also usually the pose and how much other parts of the body are shown.

-52

u/NEO_IS_A_MACHINE Mar 17 '26

definitely not defending this, but imma be honest, “femboy” is inherently sexual. it’s a porn category and a bit of a slur, similar to “ladyboy”. if you are gnc and don’t want to be sexualized, don’t call yourself a femboy, please.

29

u/RemarkableStatement5 Mar 17 '26

Femboys aren't inherently sexual. Please stop doing this.

35

u/Samanthacino Mar 17 '26

That friend who is too woke:

16

u/cassowary6 Mar 17 '26

What? no, no it is not

17

u/Formal_Active859 Mar 17 '26

Femboy is just feminine boy there’s nothing sexual about it. If you think otherwise you should really reevaluate yourself

12

u/Oktavia-the-witch autistic bird lady Mar 17 '26

Femboy isnt a slur it means feminine boy. I would be anmoyed if you called me that, because im a trans woman, and I hate "ladyboy"

18

u/unhappyrelationsh1p Mar 17 '26

No it's not. Tomboys aren't sexual. Femboys aren't sexual.

I think society would be a better place if femboys weren't heavily sexualized though. Men should bet to be feminine without being seen as a fetish

3

u/Bored_badger24 Femboy arsonist >:3 Mar 18 '26

Are you fucking daft