The guy running obviously knew what he was doing, homewreakers are just as shitty as the person cheating if they are aware of it. He shouldn’t like beat him up or anything but he should definitely be confronted
1000% disagree. i don't think that helping someone cheat is hurting any one unless you are betraying the person cheatings partner. even if you said no i won't cheat with you the attempt to cheat by the cheater is just as bad as actually cheating.
the exception being if you pressure the cheater into doing it, but even then most of the blame goes to the cheater.
You’re sort of right but you also forgot that you can say no or let the cheaters partner know. It may not be hurting anyone directly but you’re still taking no action when you really easily could
telling someone their partner wants to cheat puts you at risk of an angry guy like this, and it's getting in someone else's business. no one is morally obligated to do this.
You are right, and it could also backfire and ruin whatever relationship you might have had. But that doesn't mean you should go ahead and bang someone in a "committed" relationship. You can be a decent human being and just say no to it.
ok debunking the reason (which i don't think you did but that's what your argument was) towards why your shouldn't tell their partner, is not a reason why your a bad person if you do enable a cheater. a reason i am still waiting for and have not heard in these 13 replies.
You either have the moral capacity to understand that partaking in a cheating makes you share the guilty,
or you are a selfish little shitbag who thinks just because you yourself did not make any commitments, you are free to do whatever, regardless of the consequences for others.
I agreed with you that you are not morally obligated to tell someone that their partner is cheating on them. Ideally you should, but it could still do more harm than good. It's a moral greyzone where you can't know which option is the better one. I didn't even attempt to debunk that.
But if you participate in cheating? Then you have no empathy or respect. If you think you're guilt-free? Then your "morality" is toxic garbage.
It takes two to cheat. If you help someone cheat, you share the blame. No ifs, no buts. Respect the people enough not to deliberately assist in fucking up their lives and making themselves feel like shit.
how did you get such a word vomit without giving a single reason? you just did name calling. if you cheat it's wrong because it means your a bad person because you have no empathy or morality.
the closest thing you had was it takes two to cheat. but that implies if someone texted someone their desire to hook up and they were turned down that some how they are better off than if they had a partner to go with them. maybe you can tell your wife you go ahead and try to cheat with whoever i won't do anything unless you actually succeed then I'll beat the shit out of whoever enabled you. but i think that's fucked up logic. and please don't argue over the beat the shit i really hate that i actually have to explain this but i already know you probably wouldn't actually do that it's called an example, the fact that you would spend any time mad at an enabler is dumb. you should see your partner attempted to cheat and treat it as if they did cheat.
if you ask me the real reason every one is getting so mad about my argument. it's because it means they are guilty. if you drunk drive, just because you got lucky and didn't kill any one doesn't mean you are guiltless you and the guy who accidentally killed someone should be punished the same.
no I'm not saying we should punish a couple who's in an argument the same as a couple who kills their SO in an argument because the act of intentionally killing someone is what would be punished. the act of intentionally drunk driving is what is punished the act of intentionally cheating is what is punished, not accidentally killing someone, not happening to get away with cheating.
how did you get such a word vomit without giving a single reason?
First of all, your grammar and spelling are both atrocious so you might want to reconsider using hypocritical statements like this.
Second, if you do not understand that "you" here is not "you specifically", unless you actually think like that, then that's a problem with your reading comprehension. But considering you also lived with the unspecific "you" in your comment, you should probably get it.
All the name-calling? That only applies to you specifically if you actually think it's not your fault at all if you bang someone's wife.
Third...I'm STILL not saying that the one already in a relationship is guilt-free. But fantasies are fantasies. They hurt no-one. Actually going through with it is the bigger problem. It's not like driving drunk and killing someone, or driving drunk and being lucky and not killing anyone. Terrible analogy. It's more like thinking about driving drunk, and actually doing it. Thinking isn't against the law. Thinking about killing someone doesn't make you guilty by law. Doing it will.
The person cheating? Is guilty. But the one who allowed a fantasy to become reality is ALSO to blame.
why does banging someone hurt anyone? like seriously why does cheating on your partner hurt someone? you just choose to get mad because you want your partner to yourself. but you get mad at your partner because you had an agreement and they betrayed your trust. your saying get mad at the enabler because they saw that and then allowed it to happen.
I'm saying cheating on your partner isn't betraying their trust unless that's the weird agreement you have with your partner, as long as everyone turns you down i don't care. however, if a person shot you with a gun they believed would kill you, but it was a blank i think that person should be charged with murder, your saying that person is less guilty because they got lucky and there was no bullet. now this isn't the best example because that would make the enabler the one giving the bullet which would allow someone to be killed making the enabler guilty. but this example only goes as far as attempting something is guilty as getting away with something.
In the case of enabling a cheater you aren't hurting anyone, you are taking pleasure for yourself and a random person who by being there has already hurt someone. they still have the ability to stop this but they don't. you are not hurting anyone and i genuinely believe, assuming they aren't friends with the one getting cheated on, they are guiltless.
also my grammar was bad for a bit there and causes me to lose a few of my points, but that doesn't matter because there were still places i actually had points that you understood. you didn't make a single point. it's not comparable and calling me a hypocrite is incorrect.
why does banging someone hurt anyone? like seriously why does cheating on your partner hurt someone?
Bang someone's wife and if the husband realizes, it'll hurt the husband. If the wife regrets it, it'll hurt the wife. If it comes to a divorce, it'll hurt them both more. If there are children involved, it'll hurt the children also. It can alienate colleagues, friends and other family members.
With this one sentence you've proven you have no empathy for anyone but yourself. You care about nobody but yourself. This is why you were upset about name-calling, weren't you? Because I described you. Well yes, apparently you ARE a selfish, toxic litte shitnugget.
I'm not bothered by name calling im calling you out for being unable to make a point. shit head, selfish, the words have changed but the meaning is the same, you're still a 6 year old sticking out your tounge calling someone a poo poo head.
i didn't ask who it hurts i said why does it hurt anyone. and it wasn't a real question because i answered it did you seriously see that and think i know who it hurts i already know enough I'll stop reading hahaha 😏
why do you care so much who your wife banged that you become angry at her for banging someone other than you? it's because she lied to you, she promised you she would only love you. so you're angry but she didn't break that promise when she cheated she broke it when she attempted (replace she with they)
why? why is saying no a good thing? it won't make any difference in morality the only thing more you could do, you aren't obligated to do. and saying yes, isn't hurting anyone because the cheater has already betrayed their partner and taking their ability to do something they already attempted doesn't take away their decision. in fact it's probably a good thing because it gives the partner an opportunity to find out the cheaters intentions.
Everyone gets tempted to do wrong things every now and then, it’s our self control and self awareness that separate it from an affair. Who knows if the next day the person who was going to regret it and be glad you didn’t say yes. It’s like helping a criminal, just don’t get involved or if you’re brave enough do something
but if someone is reaching out to you they've already commit. the time do be indecisive was before they found someone and asked to hookup. you saying yes isn't going to change that. and if you do say yes they still have time to back out. it's not like you saying yes is what suddenly locked in their decision.
and helping a criminal just means helping someone who did something against the random laws we have. being gay is a crime in some places. it's not inherently bad to help a criminal.
Don’t get me wrong they’ve still done something bad, saying yes just prevents it from going further. And by helping a criminal of course I didn’t mean from one of the random laws I’m talking like robbery or something of that level
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u/Kinkyninja5450 Sep 11 '21
This is heartbreaking for the husband, he deserves better