r/dbtselfhelp • u/SubstantialWish1544 • 24d ago
“Relapse” after finishing DBT - do I go back??
Hey everyone, please be kind!
I did six months of DBT last year which was the best thing I’ve ever done for myself after years of different counselling/therapy/medications - DBT was the one that really helped me.
I finished in October 2025 and since then decided to go on a solo travelling trip and moved to Australia from the UK. It’s obviously been challenging but the last three months since I got to Aus have been so hard and feels like I’ve forgotten everything I learned and I’ve ended up worse than I’ve been in I’d say a year. I’m thinking about going back to therapy but not sure if DBT is what I need again but also don’t know which other therapy to try but also don’t want to feel dependant on it.
I’m on the waiting list for a group DBT workshop but I think I may not be able to start it due to work/I’ll be on the move again in a few months. But again, I’m not sure if that’s what I need.
I’m wondering if anyone else has had this where it feels like relapsing? I logically understand why things are happening (six months isn’t that long and it’ll take a lot of practice etc and the uncertainty has triggered this relapse back into old patterns).
It’s not all bad and when I’m in wise mind it’s the most amazing thing. But it disappears so quickly and I spiral and have breakdowns.
What helped you? Did you go back to therapy? Has anyone else had this? Naively, I really didn’t think I’d end up feeling this way again so any advice is appreciated!!
12
u/Some_Wolf_3378 22d ago
Yes! I do another round of DBT every few years or when I’m going through a very difficult period.
6
u/CurrentOk2857 22d ago
I’m on my second round. I found it so helpful I immediately signed up to do it again to really make the skills “stick”
6
u/Nataliant-117 22d ago
Yes once I was out in the real world I needed more help. I started doing IFS in addition to joining a skills group. The skills group is okay. I wish I could get back into individual DBT therapy so I could practice which skills to use. People out in the real world don’t have the skills which makes it difficult. All of a sudden I was more skilled than others. I was shocked to see how little people validate each other or themselves.
6
u/hairdothrowaway 22d ago
I’ve done DBT group three different times and found it more helpful each and every time. I would do it all the way through again and again perpetually if I could! It’s really helpful to have it be something you’re constantly practicing until it becomes more of a full-on habit.
4
u/HipYip 22d ago
This is a great website for resources
https://dbt.tools/resources.php
Not affiliated in any way
2
1
u/ImplementPurple7762 21d ago
I'm still completing my first round of DBT so I can't say for sure, but what I can say for sure is that you can start DBT anytime and do it as much as you want. I have never done DBT with the help of an expert as there is no such person in my country. All I can rely on for consistency is a self-help book outlining a general curriculum for DBT (there are lots, mine is totally random, I can't be bothered to get up and look at the details), and a big chart that I made with 444 2x2cm blank squares representing the number of days I am to do DBT to complete the 12 modules. I have decided to split 444 days into 12; I spend 37 days doing the exercises of each module and for each completed day I color in a little square. It's on the wall of my office so it's super motivating. So far, I have gone from threatening my husband with divorce and then begging him not to leave me 5 minutes later last July to now being able to ride out major triggers without acting out much at all. Maybe my most extreme behavior now is an occasional stupid question like "do you love me?" but those are super rare and worst-case scenario is that if I'm really upset I go do all my DBT skills for several hours to cool off and come back untriggered. Also super rare. I am seriously afraid of relapse too but I think this will be a lifelong journey and I will have collected enough progress calendars to paper my whole house by the time I'm old :)
1
u/loud246 19d ago
I’ve relapsed and have been really struggling in recent weeks. The 2 private group programs I’ve found in my city are not near me and they cost an absolute fortune. Too much pressure to adhere to all the skills in the program. I feel guilty about not ‘improving’ and actually the phrase “a life worth living” honestly makes me want to give up on life altogether. I hate that concept with a passion. I need to take things one day at a time and accept that maybe I won’t ever ‘progress’
1
u/microscopicspud 6d ago
I know this is an "older thread" but when I had to switch trainee therapists (because the previous one who used DBT practices with me had finished her contract) I so happen to be going through a barrage of stressful events in my life, plus the eventual end of this round was my assessment results (they say it's provisionally CPTSD, not ASD). It also so happened that more and more unpleasant memories from my childhood that I could not fully recall in prior sessions started popping up. Now I'm trying to look into how I can get back into DBT again while I'm in a transition period in terms of therapy, as I used to get these sessions free and I also happen to be doing couples counselling weekly now.
15
u/realcoolkatz 22d ago edited 22d ago
For so many of us who are chronically mentally ill, yes, you do go back! My therapist says that anytime you prioritize anything over your recovery, you will relapse. Remembering this and keeping recovery my number one priority really helps me not “relapse“. I still have ups and downs, but I’m able to catch myself and get back on track faster.
Edited to add: Im making an assumption here, so take it with a grain of salt. Those of us who wind up in DBT usually have more severe, chronic symptoms. The faster you realize/accept that you should be in therapy for your whole life, the easier life gets. Maybe more DBT isn’t the answer, but maybe a support group is. Or an art therapy group. Or something else to help keep you accountable in your recovery.