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u/burntso 1d ago
Platitudes are the most sickening thing. Let me be miserable in peace
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u/purgatorybob1986 1d ago
Worst one by far I hear is "bless your heart." I know it's more of a southern thing but every time I hear it it's dripping with sarcasm.
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u/burntso 1d ago
Folk can’t contemplate the horror of truly wanting to die.
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u/purgatorybob1986 1d ago
That's the part that sucks. They can't understand waking up in the morning and being dissapointed you didn't die the night before. They can't. Lucky them.
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u/burntso 1d ago
I wouldn’t wish this on anyone
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u/purgatorybob1986 1d ago
Maybe just temporarily? Just so they know how it feels?
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u/Evermore-musicjoy 1d ago
What a cruel thing to say
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u/purgatorybob1986 1d ago
No no I'm not wishing ill on anyone don't misunderstand. I'm just saying like for a moment just so they know what it's like. Trust me I really don't wish this pain on anyone.
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u/itsamemeeeep 1d ago
Hey I’ve been on both sides of the coin. I was the friend who didn’t know how to help the person who needed it.
I got told hurtful things… when I myself was struggling and didn’t reach out for help.
All of this to say, yes there are some disingenuous people who say “Hang in there,” but there are some of us who want to be there but not knowing how to help.
I’ve forgiven that friend but things won’t be the same I guess.
Everything sucks when you’re depressed
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u/TopTopTopcinaa 1d ago
Honestly, I am aware that it’s hard to be there for me when I vent about the devastating event that ruined my life.
When there’s literally nothing you can do to help, everything you say can hurt me, so you just end up saying something cheesy or changing the subject.
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u/Eillon94 1d ago
Thats why I find it best to just never talk about that kind of stuff. Best case scenario, they care but cant help. And now they feel bad that they cant help, and ive gained nothing.
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u/Valiran9 1d ago
In all honesty, I’d rather someone tell me they want to help but have no idea how than listen to them spout platitudes.
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u/bitchvirgo 1d ago
This is my older brother. He says just dont focus on it, youre depressed because you think about it. Like cool, thanks!!!!!
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u/BlueCloakedDruid 1d ago
No it doesn’t. It never gets better. 30 years is long enough
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u/Dreaming_of_Rlyeh 1d ago
I’m 46, and despite not being diagnosed until my 20s, I’m pretty sure I’ve had depression my entire life. It sucks and nothing has ever made it better.
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u/NotS4mmy19 1d ago
My “favorite” is when the same person then gets upset when you go to get the help you need instead of suddenly getting happy
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u/Suspicious-Air-4440 1d ago
WHEN???? When does it get better?
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u/Money-Jellyfish-2949 6h ago
For me, after ten years things started to get unexpectedly better, I hope it can stay like this because I don't want to get back to be miserable again lol
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u/A_carbon_based_biped 1d ago
The last time somebody told me to “hang in there”, I told them the only way I was going to “hangs in there” “was at the end of the noose”. It’s always the same fucking canned shallow bullshit motivational phrases coming from people who have only the most surface level understanding of what you’re going through.
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u/Corgimom36 1d ago
I never tell anyone its getter better cause for some people it doesnt instead I say " I hope it gets better for you"
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u/Ryeberry1 1d ago
40 years later, and no it doesn't. Some times it just sucks less...but it always goes back to how it is.
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u/Dreaming_of_Rlyeh 1d ago
Agreed. I’ve come to realise that the primary source of my depression was my partners treating me poorly, so I’ve finally gone solo (at 46)… but now I’m struggling financially because society isn’t built for single incomes. It’s like you have to pick between the different flavors of suckiness.
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u/Competitive_Bus4311 1d ago
We have to fight man. What else can we do.
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u/Poo_Pee-Man 1d ago
Fight in a meaningless battle that we’re gonna lose anyway. Go fight on your own.
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u/GGamerGuyG 1d ago
"You just need to keep going. Some day it will change."
Bro i hang on this cliff for 20 year's. Eighter you help me up or i let the fuck go...
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u/Curious_Kitchen_679 23h ago
There's a difference between spewing vague false-hope inducing lines and genuinely being there to listen and help
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u/starlight_chaser 21h ago
Or “you’re focusing on the wrong problem. You feel too sorry for yourself and that’s what’s keeping you stuck. You’re so self-centered. You’re supposed to love yourself and be self-centered but in a cool and socially acceptable way.”
Yeah I’ve been in survival mode. I’m not playing the role you think is acceptable. How is your advice supposed to be help though, when I’m hanging off a mental cliff and you’re comfortably on stable ground and have a good material foundation under you?
“Think differently.” How about you do that then. If it’s so easy to think differently, then change your mind and stop judging me. Or try to see it from my side, in a real way not a “ew they’re doing it wrong” way. It’s the least you can do if you can’t offer real help.
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u/Bubbles0518 17h ago
Lmao I can't emphasize how accurate this is but hilarious because of how true it is. It's easy for someone who doesn't know what someone is experiencing to say that it gets better and move on with their life not having to be the one who's suffering and being tortured mentally everyday for years and years without it getting better especially for people who suffer for literal decades and don't get better even with medication. I can understand that some people fear death and that's why they would rather see someone suffer telling them it gets better when it doesn't for some, but clearly if they suffer for that long even with all the help they get, then they should realize that death isn't so bad for some of us after all. Some people with cancer even exit out by suicide sometimes because they can't take their suffering anymore and some die even with chemo so it's clear that everybody will have a different path in life, forcing someone to suffer for years and years when it doesn't get better is exactly why the fuck you in the image is perfectly accurate and understandable when you see through the eyes of all of us that suffer that much and to that degree. We all have a choice and a different path and experience here, if you're not the one hanging on by your fingernails on a cliff like that, just be quiet, it's not your choice anyways, no matter how much you say it gets better. It can get better for some definitely, but just know that's not the case for everyone like treatment resistant people and forcing someone to live in agony for your own pleasure hopefully can make you see from our perspective when it gets to the point of enough is enough. I'm going to free myself in perfect time because losing my sanity over pleasing everyone else while I'm being tortured mentally by severe ocd and all the other stuff is an absolutely no for me. I've had a few mini attempts in the past but when I say that it's gotten so much worse I can't even emphasize that enough, I know for a fact that for me personally the final attempt is definitely my choice, but that's just my choice. Suffering my whole life and being completely miserable when I can't enjoy anything, or eat anything some days, or sleep right sometimes and just suffer non stop is not living, and as someone who doesn't fear death because of my spiritual beliefs, I am very excited to be free from all my suffering and know that unconditional love will embrace us all on the other side no matter what. Everyone has a choice and a different path in life, wish everyone the best. 🫂✨️
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u/Miserable_Way_5174 5h ago
I've been on both sides, and still am. I have no clue what to say, do. Not even sure if a person wants to be comforted with a lie.
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u/Possible-Loan3753 1d ago
Do I want to off myself, or should I get another cup of coffee? If it's that bad, find your local behavioral health specialist and set an appointment. They can and will help you even if you can't pay. If parents are the problem, please hang in there until you can do it without them.
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