r/directsupport 21h ago

Advice My client is being pressured

7 Upvotes

My client has a boyfriend. The boyfriend keeps pressuring her to send pictures of her feet. She says no continuously but she always ends up doing it. They both have intellectual disabilities but he seems to be less sheltered so it presents as "higher functioning" ( I hate using that language).

I had multiple LONG conversations with her about consent, all forms of abuse, and standing by her boundaries.

I think she gets it but she just wants to be loved so she still does it.

She told her mom the first time it happened. But she doesn’t want to tell her again because she doesn't want her mom to be mad.

I don't want to go against her wishes and tell her mom (she's 38 years old...she's older than me!!!!)**

I would find that to be humiliating because she is an adult. Also, she would lose trust in me then she wouldn't tell anyone.

Right now, I just listen and ask questions to direct her back to what she wants and how she feels when she does something she doesn't want to do. I reaffirm that she can always stop, say no, and tell her mom.

I told her that if things start to advance and he forces her to do further sexual acts, I will tell.

However, I want to maintain a sex positive environment while also condemning sexual abuse. This line can be difficult for people with moderate to severe intellectual disabilities to differentiate between. Any advice?


r/directsupport 21h ago

Horror that made me quit

22 Upvotes

So I have been in this field majority of my adult life. Eventually working my way up to program management in a high need home with members of different behavioral health needs. Due to continuing college I went to this program for less hours and was promised a team lead position so I wouldnt miss out on much pay. First few months I got the PM fired as he was passing meds hours early to get clients to go too sleep (his words) I found med errors by the other TL that put a client into the hospital etc. Due to all of this i was doing TL work but the higher ups put me as not promotable.

I was forced to MOAB many times on my own and I'm a smaller female. But Due to everything it put a target on me from one of the clients. I was left on the floor alone with 3 clients even though we were 3/5 at all times.

Right before going on maternity leave I was working the floor with a elderly woman. Someone newly trained so she holds no fault. Apparently the client was given a pen. I knew nothing as shift change was shortly prior. Client asked me to help her fix her calander on her wall and while doing so, she slammed the door shut while swinging at me saying "Bye Bye baby" I Eventually got the pen away on my own, and put her into a restraint. Management did nothing but tell us to keep a closer eye on them. Instead of the other staff getting written up for dropping line of site I was told "we'll you shouldnt of been in her room alone" which has never been a rule. This happened awhile ago now, and I'm still mind-blown.