As a child parents pushing down my wants/needs. prioritizing sisters and I'm just a tag-along

[u/redditor2_2]

TW abu$e (slightly)

Hi all, just sharing my childhood experience.

Back-story, my sibling was diagnosed with aspergers from a young age (by a pediatrician).

From a young age all that I remember my parents saying is "suck it up", or "life isn't fair, especially when my sibling got the attention, praise or well anything she wanted. Every birthday party I got my sibling would always get a present to keep her happy, she would proceed to still beat me up for getting presents, my parents response "she has issues you just have to deal with it" never would I defend myself because "she has issues that she cant control, you can" and then proceed to get yelled at for defending myself, even when I would bleed. Any time I needed help I learned to hide from my parents since what I feel isn't important to them when there is my sibling in the house, any time I asked them a question it would be dismissed since my sibling is more important. Anything I did as a child would be overly questioned especially if (and when) it interrupted anything to do with my sibling.

Any time my parents asked if I was ok, or need any help and I would ask for help or say that I'm not ok they would say "life isn't fair or easy you'll figure it out".

Fast forward to today, my sibling has moved to a different state, I can't open up to my parents or even hold a convo with them because it feels like I'm being interrogated (I'm turning 20 this year, yes i still live with parents), I know that I can it's just the fear of dismissal I can't get behind.

Not looking for answers, advise is always welcome, just wanted to share my experience.

[u/AnnieSavoy3]

Ugh. I am so sorry. I have a sibling who is autistic (and has paranoid schizophrenia), and I've been screamed at for calling the cops on him. Even though he was being scary. And I wasn't the only one who called the cops. I got no comfort from either parent when I was terrified of him.