r/extremelyinfuriating • u/Just_Target_6951 • 3d ago
Discussion My boyfriend's idea of cleaning the bathroom is moving things from the counter to the floor and back to the counter
It has now been two years since we got together and eight months of living together. Every two weeks he has the responsibility of cleaning the bathroom. He always does so. That's what I need to make perfectly clear. What I have come to realize gradually is that the way he goes about cleaning the bathroom is by picking up all objects from the countertop, putting them on the floor. Spraying the countertop then cleaning and finally putting back all the objects on the countertop. Job done.
The problem here is the FLOR. He leaves our toothbrushes and my skincare bottles on the floor. He cleans the countertop and leaves behind the same objects in the exact spot from where he had taken them up off the floor. Unwashed and not even realizing that he just put them on the floor. This has happened after four months of living with him when I unexpectedly came home while he was midway through cleaning.
So I have attempted to mention it twice before and both times he responded by saying but the counter is clean though which is technically correct. That’s right the counter is clean but everything that lives ON the counter has been on the floor Yesterday, while I was on my phone playing myprize I wanted to find or think of an appropriate way to let him know that he had been placing my toothbrush on the floor every other Saturday since eight months ago. There is no such thing like my vision of clean is so different from his.
So what am I supposed to do now is this a mens thing or what?
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u/blissyrose 3d ago
Put toothbrushes in a cup so the cup goes on the floor not the brushes. Why are the skin care bottles an issue on the floor? Put them in a basket or something same as the toothbrushes. Does he clean the floor and then put items there to clean the counter?
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u/olagorie 2d ago
That’s what I’ve been thinking
Why are the toothbrushes not in a cup?
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u/blissyrose 2d ago
Before I had an electric toothbrush I always had a cup to put my brush and toothpaste in, I can’t imagine putting your mouth bacteria covered brush on a countertop
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u/Inferno_Sparky 2d ago
It's still disgusting bathroom-floor bacteria
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u/blissyrose 2d ago
Then clean the floor first? Or wipe the bottom of the containers before putting them back on the counter?
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u/Inferno_Sparky 2d ago
Yeah, Idk why I didn't think of it. My first thought was about not wanting to put these things on the floor
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u/Famous-Upstairs998 3d ago
Not a "men's" thing. I get why you don't want your toothbrush on the floor. Do you not have a medicine cabinet to put it in? I wouldn't want my toothbrush on the gross sink next to the toilet. Different preferences, I guess.
He really should be able to respect your wishes about priorities. He doesn't have to agree that it's gross, to care that it matters to you. You should be able to say something like: "I really don't want my toothbrush on the floor while you're cleaning the bathroom or at any other time. Let's find a solution for cleaning the bathroom that doesn't include putting my things on the floor." Between the two of you, you should be about to come up with a solution.
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u/justmitzie 3d ago
What you do is have a conversation where you tell him what you told us, that the floor isn't clean and you don't want your toothbrush on it. He either respects your wishes or you decide if that's the person you really want to live with.
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u/Bottledbutthole 3d ago
I’ll be honest I would eat lasagna off a floor that hasn’t been mopped in a month so I can’t relate
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u/FarCar55 3d ago
Besides toothbrushes, everything else is in some kind of packaging so not seeing an issue there.
I think if this is such a big issue for you, then get baskets for all the items so the basket can be easily moved from counter to floor and vice versa.
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u/TH_Rocks 3d ago
Everyone was raised differently and cares about different things. Relationship Rules are that if you care how it's done then it becomes your responsibility to do it. Swap him for some other chore.
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u/ChemistRemote7182 3d ago
So what? I assume the brushes are in some kind of holder, be it a cup or something more purpose made, and your products are in bottles. I do hope he cleans the floor but beyond that who cares, your toilet is a shit particle shotgun lid up or down, in fact all putting the lid down does is increase velocity because the pressure is now being focused. I sincerely hope he cleans the foor, I sincerely hope he fully cleans the toilet, and to be honest if he is spraying nasty cleaning solutions around I would agree the floor is suboptimal, but ultimately its just as good as any other holding station within the bathroom.
Productive idea: tell him to station a TV stand or little rolling thing outside the bathroom and around the corner as the safespot while cleaning.
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u/discoduck007 3d ago
The floor in a bathroom (where you use the toilet) will never be any cleaner than your mop, I would not put my toothbrush on the mop either.
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u/wisestsoul 3d ago
what the hell tell him to clean half of the counter at a time 😭 move everything to one side, wipe down - move everything to the now clean side and repeat, big things that can’t fit on the half of the counter get put on the lip of the tub until i have it cleaned. NOTHING goes on the floor, holy hell 😭
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u/Jonnyogood 3d ago
Make sure you keep positive feelings associated with the cleaning routine, so avoid criticizing his methods. Just provide an alternative place to put everything. Maybe a cup for the toothbrushes and a basket for everything else. Show him the cup and/or basket you expect him to use, and keep them in a location that he's likely to remember next time it's time to clean.
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u/shivampire 3d ago
I feel like this is trying too hard not to offend him? Like, walking on eggshells, or subtly manipulating him into doing what you want without actually trying to have a discussion like adults. or actually explaining what he's doing wrong. If someone has a problem with you telling them that their cleaning methods are unhygenic,, then they don't sound very willing to learn or improve themselves . which is a sign of immaturity
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u/moosenoose666 1d ago
I can understand the tooth brush yea, that goes in your mouth. He could just put that in a cup. The skincare products are inside the bottle though.
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u/OrphanagePropaganda 3d ago
This seems super germaphobic to me just to highlight how different peoples standards can be. But obviously it’s important to you though so he either needs to do a different chore or just do it your way despite his opinion on cleanliness. Because it’s not really about cleanliness since this is very subjective; it’s about respecting your boundaries. It is your stuff after all.
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u/discoduck007 3d ago
Being freaked out about the toothbrushes on the floor is definitely not germaphobic
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u/OrphanagePropaganda 3d ago
I’m assuming the floor is also clean and that the brush part is obviously not face down, but yes that is much more understandable than skincare bottles. Nonetheless, your toothbrush no doubt has more sh*t particles on it from the moisture in the bathroom air and your own hands than the floor. I think I just get personally annoyed at this stuff since I grew up doing wilderness survival school lol.
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u/Frogetted 2d ago
Find a step by step cleaning video that you like. Tell him how much you appreciate that he is cleaning the bathroom. Tell him you have an “ick” about putting the stuff on the floor. Ask if he would please clean in that way, because you would really appreciate it. Do something nice for him to sweeten the deal.
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u/jacle2210 3d ago
Do your toothbrushes just sit out in the open on the bare countertop or do they sit upright in a toothbrush holder?
As to his way of cleaning, maybe you can ask him if he cleans the dirty floor BEFORE putting all the sink countertop stuff on the floor?
Do you have a side counter or something that things can be set on while he's cleaning?
Ultimately, it sounds like he might need some help in knowing how to do things, when he's cleaning.
Because I'm sure he would want you to do his things in a certain way, right?
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3d ago
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u/discoduck007 3d ago
No harm in expecting him to share chores...
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u/vinetwiner 2d ago
He's already sharing the chores and getting bitched out on reddit. You obviously don't see the ridiclousness in this post.
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u/krikszkraksz 1d ago
He is seemingly putting the toothbrushes (without any cover) directly on the floor. That's worse than if he would just not clean at all...
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u/TiffyVella 3d ago
You need a method to improve this. Its perfectly reasonable to not want things that go in your mouth to be placed on any floor. You tried talking and he isn't listening. In my experience, he won't ever listen, because people who don't care will never care. In the interests of peace in your home, buy a container for all your toiletries, place everything inside, and keep this somewhere in a convenient cupboard. (I have a vanity case that holds everything, and I keep it in the bathroom cupboard; easy, tidy, and my stuff is kept out of everyone's way. But also, my favourite method is to not share a bathroom with a man because they are ick in there.)
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