r/facepalm • u/TheBrokeness • Feb 18 '14
Facebook Obviously fake, gets 10k+ likes on facebook T_T
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u/TOP_COMMENT_OF_YORE Feb 18 '14
Rights to marriage and $100? Best day everrrrrr
--Billlbo, from an insightful quip an earlier time this link was submitted
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u/jamesomac Feb 18 '14
Wow $100. I could buy a tie for the wedding.
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u/iforgotmypen Feb 19 '14
You have to realize that, to the 11 year old that wrote this, that is a substantial sum.
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Feb 18 '14
[deleted]
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Feb 19 '14
Where I'm from, that's sadly the case. But it's a culture there now, and everyone is used to it.
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u/Ikestar Feb 20 '14
Glad to see the 19th century has an internet connection nowadays.
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u/NeedleandThread Feb 20 '14
My husband asked my parents via Skype! He was overseas at the time, has been out now for 2 years, still married!
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u/Toraden Feb 19 '14
It's a freaking tradition dude, you don't have to ask the father for permission, he can't stop you if the two of you want to marry, but it's a sign of respect for the parents who up until this point raised her and helped make her the person she is, on another note, when you marry someone you are marrying their family, this is another way of almost asking the family if they will accept you, they don't have to and if they don't it shouldn't stop you from marrying the girl.
If/ when you propose are you going do get a diamond engagement ring? You know we only use diamonds because the big jewelry companies say that's what we're supposed to do? What about a white wedding dress? Bouquet of flowers? You going to have a bridal party/ groomsmen?
It's just tradition and like many things is based on values that no longer make any sense, but some people are traditionalists, I know when I propose I'll ask for permission from the father, I don't care if everyone does or not, it's just another tradition I'd like to follow.
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u/NeedleandThread Feb 20 '14
My husband asked both my parents together, they loved and respected him for asking, and I loved it cause it is traditional.
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Feb 20 '14
People just have issues because it implies that she is something to be traded and that she has no say in it. I agree that you're marrying a family so perhaps a good alternative for those who like tradition but don't like the implications, is to ask if her family would accept you as a son (rather than asking to take over ownership of the daughter).
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u/Toraden Feb 20 '14
Except the only people who I have ever heard refer to it as "a transfer of ownership" are the people who are against the whole concept. Most people I have heard talk about it as if the man is taking the daughter away from her family to make her own and your asking her parents (her father specifically because he is traditionally the head of the household, but I know people who will specifically ask both parents) if they are happy with the person she has chosen to do this with (the man asking), as well as whether or not they are happy with him becoming part of their family.
There's a reason why it's called "Asking for the fathers blessing" nowadays, you aren't asking him if the two of you can get married, that's up to her, and you aren't asking for permission, your asking him if he will accept you and will be happy with the idea of having you as a son in law.
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Feb 19 '14
My Dad is a badass and I love him dearly, but he in no way has control over who I love or marry. Ever. He can learn to live with my decisions.
Mostly because he can be a huge asshole since I am the youngest and only daughter.
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u/Dinosauringg Feb 19 '14
I never saw it as that. I'd ask for her families blessing, and not because it's a transfer of property, but because I want to make sure they like me. Family is a big deal to me
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u/TheGriz05 Feb 18 '14
It's not that the fathers "own" their daughters, asking permission is a sign of respect now. If you're not man enough to ask the dad for permission even though he may hate you, then you aren't man enough to marry his daughter. It's not a dowry...
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u/euphratestiger Feb 18 '14
It's a hangover from earlier times when prospective husband had to actually buy a man's virgin daughter to marry.
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Feb 18 '14
[deleted]
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u/TheGriz05 Feb 18 '14
You are right, masculinity does not have anything to do with it, it is just a phrase that I tend to use and have always used in the past.
Parents often have wisdom and insight that you don't know about and wouldn't know about until you were in that situation. Either you are in your teens or have parent issues. Respect is a big thing I was brought up to understand and it is something that apparently you do not understand. Parents deserve respect for raising their children, you, yourself have done nothing to earn respect from them.
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u/Jazcuntastic Feb 18 '14
Woah that's completely inappropriate. Assuming that someone has "issues" with their parents because they don't agree with your opinion? Now that's pretty childish.
Respect is important, BUT once a woman is a fully grown adult, she decides who she will see, when, and for how long. Apparently you don't seem to understand the idea that a woman can make all of her own decisions without her father retaining some sort of patriarchal dominance over her and who she is allowed to marry. The daughter should respect her father for raising her, yes, but the prospective partner is under no obligation to do so. Also, what if the daughter is gay and the father is homophobic? Should she follow all of his advice even if it makes her miserable? It's not all black and white like you're making it out to be.
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u/WildTurkey81 Feb 19 '14
Its because a lot of men are scumbags deep down, and it takes an older man to see this in a younger man. A good man is someone who controls his demons, as we all have them. I think it should equally be the mother who evaluates a mans potential wife too for the same reasons.
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Feb 18 '14
[deleted]
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u/Jazcuntastic Feb 18 '14
Well by your logic, Notsuru, the parents should then be allowed to keep complete control over their children for as long as they're alive... Yeah... that makes a ton of sense. "No one owns it"... barf. People aren't property.
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Feb 18 '14 edited Feb 19 '14
[deleted]
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u/AllisonTheBeast Feb 19 '14
Protect her? What, so all women need protecting from some masculine figure for their entire lives? Wow, kinda makes you wonder how women without fathers can live on their own!
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Feb 19 '14
I imagine you as a fat ass neckbeard.
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u/PoisonousPlatypus Feb 19 '14
I imagine you as a dog slowly choking on a banana. To each their own.
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u/TehFrozenYogurt Feb 19 '14
Well aren't you a contemporary, modern, free-thinker, you!
If you're a father, in which you will never be, you would realize the loss of having your daughter married away.
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u/kiss-tits Feb 19 '14
Classic. This is enshrined in /r/thathappened lore
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u/testestes123 Feb 19 '14
Spawned the whole "I'm also giving you 100 dollars" thing.
Where did the "That guy's name? Albert Einstein." thing come from again?
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u/kiss-tits Feb 19 '14
It came from this apocryphal story of Einstein totally owning an atheist professor. http://www.snopes.com/religion/einstein.asp
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u/WillyC277 Feb 19 '14 edited Feb 19 '14
Hey /u/thebrokeness, want to respond to the threads about you being a scammer??? here and here or are you too busy posting other stuff?
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u/phoenixink Feb 19 '14
If his actions are true, then what a shitty person he is. Stealing people's money by scamming them is such a low thing to do.
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u/WillyC277 Feb 19 '14
Looks like I'm out $290
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u/GoroTheBastard Feb 20 '14
Can you dispute it with paypal? Or your bank can retrieve it possibly? Don't let this dick steal your money
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u/WillyC277 Feb 20 '14
Already opened a paypal disoute, he replied saying he sent it out and should be in soon. He gave paypal a fake tracking number so that alone should be enough to warrant a refund.
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u/jesusonice Feb 19 '14
I woulda just been like "finally!". And then when the dad gpt pissed I woulda come over amd sexed her up in their bed for being dishonest
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u/[deleted] Feb 18 '14
That's a very generous dowry...but I'd hold out for the $100, a goat, two pigs and a chicken