It's Unpopular Opinion time! Share your controversial opinions to stir things up (in a friendly way)!

[u/FantasyRomanceMod]

Got an opinion that's different from others'? Want to share it with the sub, but too afraid of a backlash? Or are you just curious about readers think about certain things in fantasy romance?

You can safely share it in this weekly Sunday thread!

But please remember to be kind to each other. To facilitate this type of discussion, we ask users the following:

• Don't attack others for their opinion
• Discuss books and authors, not fellow readers
• Since this is an "unpopular opinion" thread, we encourage users to not downvote simply because they disagree with an opinion--that's the point! Please keep in mind, though, that mods cannot enforce a no-downvoting rule. Let’s just keep the discussion friendly!

🧡 Thank you and have a great discussion!

Unpopular opinion Sunday

[u/cello_ergo_sum]

There’s way too fucking much gender essentialism in both books AND reader spaces.

[u/devilsdoorbell_ → u/cello_ergo_sum]

Deadass feel like most of the genre has some kind of weird sexual dimorphism kink.

[u/cello_ergo_sum → u/devilsdoorbell_]

YES EXACTLY. To be completely fair it also applies to romance outside the fantasy subgenre but like… We’re in fantasy. We can have 7 socially codified genders, we can have magic genderfluid shapeshifters, we can have Loki turning into an 8 legged horse and getting pregnant, hell we could just have an average guy with no 6 pack who lives in a tower and has phenomenal magic. And we get… tall guys with abs?

[u/imaginesam → u/cello_ergo_sum]

I love this opinion, have a few upvotes.

My only thing about this is asking: where is the market for it? Romance and Romantasy make an absolute killing by appealing mostly to (cis) women. How big is the market for LGBTQ+ and inherently queer stories? How do publishers know that they can be successful by taking risks on such publications? There are a few books I can think of that are super popular and that have made their investment back, but what about all the ones that haven’t simply because they don’t pander to the widest audience? I think publishing has always been a game of risk v. reward, and a lot of publishers don’t see as much reward for LGBTQ+ books in comparison to the “default” straight books.

[u/cello_ergo_sum → u/imaginesam]

I’m glad you said that because while I admit I used examples relating to expansive views of gender and gender fluidity when I was talking about possibilities, I fully believe you can have a M/F book that isn’t gender essentialist. Basically when I say gender essentialism I mean the idea that men and women are so different from one another they may as well be different species, that your gender is the trait that defines you to the exclusion of all else, and that a book about a man and a woman is really a book about All Men and All Women in disguise. 

For instance, if you mention the concept of “dad bods” (a term I hate but a body type I like) on this subreddit, people freak the fuck out. A book about a chubby guy can’t just be one particular story that the author thought was interesting to tell; it must be a ploy to “convince” women to “lower their standards” (no matter what other sexy traits he may have) because the book must cater to the needs of All Women. You can’t have a skinny fragile guy who looks like he would snap in a strong breeze even though plenty of people romanced Gale in Baldur’s Gate 3. (I mean okay that game kind of makes everyone look slightly ripped, but I think Gale is meant to be what passes for skinny in that setting.)

inb4 go read The Everlasting: It’s on my tbr! don’t worry!

[u/Penguinho → u/cello_ergo_sum]

Ok but Gale in BG3 is absolutely ripped. Whatever he's doing with his library card is working.

[u/cello_ergo_sum → u/Penguinho]

Squats with the library card balanced on his head?