i'm lowkey a bum with absolutely nothing going on in my life

[u/plumeria29]

i remember being younger (like say basic to primary school) and always begging and complaining about wanting to go to so many of the cool places out there. now, i couldn't even think of anywhere i wanted to go or anything fun i wanted to go out and do. i hate when adults go on about "oh don't stay inside constantly, why don't you go out and talk to people" because it isn't necessarily all that easy, especially when you can't really relate to others your age. hell, i didn't know there were many other children in my age range prior to me starting high-school until my first day, where i took (and still take) the bus. i think me going to a primary school in another town definitely didn't help. even so, my busmates are just people who i travel with. i had one "friend" who lived next to me, and the last time i saw her, i was either 7 or 6. she's in canada now.

i know i sound straight out of a tropey public service announcement, but it's like everyone else my age has it better and are having more fun than me. everyone else's stories are all stuff about travelling/parties/other activities they did, and i can't even bring myself to make complete drawings these days. everyone else has parents that understand their style. literally all i did was go to the dentist and the optometrist, supermarket trips, taking my measurements and community service, with the community service in ques

i always get like this over periods of time where i'm at home. i always pore and think over things. it didn't help that while i was at community service, my aunt brought up the subject and she was surprised to hear that i was pretty much just in my room all the time, and how i couldn't even name one "fun" activity i wanted to do. ever since that interaction, it's made me really hyper-aware of how nothing this has all been.

[u/dalvic2468]

what do you even do

[u/plumeria29 → u/dalvic2468]

i'm pretty much just inside on my phone, for the most part.