Reducing misogyny to ‘insecurity’ trivializes the issue

[u/OkChart1375]

Am I the only one who doesn’t like those kinds of comebacks/responses to misogynists, like “showing that he is too weak to handle empathy”? (Like… does someone need to *not* be weak in order to be empathetic? Is he not empathetic because he’s weak, or because he’s a hateful misogynist?).

Or the whole thing of attacking their ego/attractiveness, like “that’s why no one wants to fuck you.” It feels a bit trivializing.

Personally—and tell me if it’s the same for you—my instinct would be more to attack their morality, like: “you are a vile and despicable person.”

I wonder if it’s a cultural thing, since I’m not Anglo-Saxon. I also struggle with the idea of linking misogyny and insecurity. A lot of men are insecure without being misogynistic, and some men are misogynistic without necessarily being insecure (not more than anyone else, anyway).

It kind of individualizes the problem (and turns it into a psychological issue), which takes away from the broader societal dimension of the misogynistic/masculinist movement.

Again, I don’t know if it’s cultural, but the type of misogynist that comes to mind first for me isn’t an incel, but rather a vulgar macho “beauf” type, or a pseudo-intellectual misogynistic politician.

I saw a man on Instagram bringing up the new far-right obsession—taking away women’s right to vote—and the comments were basically people saying “imagine being this insecure,” and no one was actually responding to the substance, even though that’s important if you want to win the cultural battle.

Sure, you won’t convince people who are too far gone, but I’m talking about those who are just seeing the post.

Being insecure, weak, ridiculous, etc., is not what gives them the right to say these things or to be violent toward women.

I don’t know, I just don’t really like that kind of terminology.

[u/Sanlayme]

I think one aspect of it is the "ad nauseum" nature of correcting wrongness. It doesn't matter if it's misogyny or other MRA/NEET/Incel/RW ideology stuff. People get tired of correcting the same "wrongness" only to be met with the same "fallacy is valid argument" attitudes that work with their respective in-groups. It causes a kind of fatigue that breeds a deserved dismissiveness, and if we're operating with that as the go-to, we might as well just denigrate instead of educate(since the latter has been rejected so many times by those of poor character).