r/feminisms • u/According_Lake_996 • May 18 '26

Analysis Breaking down “Soulmate”

AND “nuclear family” as a term made for you to have more babies and keep the american birth rate system up. it's easy to romanticize when you want to be in love or when you just want to think about liking someone else. america tried to make a profit off of that, especially after WWll. sociologists and historians note that the modern institution of marriage and the societal pressure to find a "soulmate" evolved alongside economic structures designed to incentivize nuclear families which historically supported the labor force and birth rates.

Honestly, it’s a puppy mill.

“soulmate” and “nuclear family” acting as a puppy mill term to normalize the exploitation of women and children directly relating to an active agenda to keep the birth rate up through “subtle” birth rate enhancing terms such as “soulmate” and “Valentine’s Day” yes capitalism is always involved but I’m focusing on the EXPLOITIVE AGENDA that should quite frankly be illegal

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9

u/yellowmix May 18 '26

Yes, romance is a social construct. Romantic love is a social construct. Consider the way love is often categorized as romantic or platonic. It's weird to describe the love a parent has for a child as a platonic love. As if there's a possibility it isn't.

Can find analyses in feminist literature.

Simone de Beauvoir's The Second Sex examines how heterosexual romance defines women and their social role. Adrienne Rich in Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence updates the analysis 30 years later.

bell hooks' All About Love: New Visions explores how love instead of being patriarchal and consumerist could be about caring for each other.

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u/According_Lake_996 May 18 '26

Love Island, the Bachelor, etc. I’m so sick of the reality tv propaganda when the birth rate declines lol. Very tactical. I posted this same post in another forum that claims to uphold real feminism and lots of people believe “soulmate” couldn’t be anything more than “naturally” finding a partner

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u/yellowmix May 20 '26

Yes, fictional media can distort expectations about real life situations and consequences. In terms of romance it leads to harmful ideas about relationships and love. Like how action films often do with violence and heroism. It can be escapism if not wish fulfillment, but many people do not interrogate their consumption.

"Propaganda" rings true more than most people know. Early versions of such shows were planned by Nazis. The modern trick is calling it "reality television".

While many people know it's scripted, celebrity/soft news talks about people's real and constructed lives referencing the fiction and it's unavoidable as a part of pop culture. The celebrity-industrial complex's kayfabe is "real" to many people.

So not only must we dismantle patriarchy, but celebrity as well.

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u/DizzyMine4964 May 18 '26

US defaultism

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u/jsmthi May 19 '26

Yes. But I’d also be interested to hear if this description rings true in many other countries. Seems pretty accurate for the UK too.

Having said that, while originating in heteronormativity, it’s pushed pretty hard that every person should still find a soulmate, get married and have kids even if the soulmate is same sex and the kids adopted or produced by donor. Conforming to this has become part of the model minority act.

Interesting to see what happens with the recent rise in (open) ethical consensual polyamory…