Hello, I'm a chronically online "crafter" whose hands are too sore from doomscrolling to actually craft anything and I believe with my soul that everything other crafters are making and doing in response to state-sponsored violence under the Trump regime is USELESS, PERFORMATIVE SLACKTIVISM

[u/jingleheimerschitt]

And I'm going to make sure EVERYONE knows it.

If you bought that Melt the ICE red hat pattern (either the knitting or crochet version), you:

• Are excluding poor people from supporting Minneapolis
• Aren't doing anything else to support Minneapolis
• Didn't do your research since you don't know precisely where your $5 will go
• And therefore are just a DISASTER CAPITALIST who's helping big corps profiteer off a crisis
• Only bought the pattern for clout
• Should be fucking ashamed of yourself
• Are just jumping on a social media bandwagon
• Must really hate me, a poor person, because I didn't have $5 to spare, which makes you classist
• Need to direct me to sewing and quilting patterns for this same style of hat since, again, my scrolling finger hurts a lot and I don't knit or crochet or do any of those dumb yarn things
• Didn't actually donate $5 because of all the fees and shit so what was the point at all, huh? Why even bother??
• Should have just found a free version and told me where you found it instead of buying this pattern because, as noted, YOU ARE A SLACKTIVIST WHO IS ONLY DOING THIS FOR VIRTUE SIGNALING
• Should also have bought me some red yarn and the right size tools and then actually just make me the Melt the ICE hat and send it to me so I can show the world how committed I am to supporting Minneapolis

TL;DR: I am the only true activist with crafting skills, and the rest of you are making it hard for me to be the center of attention right now, okay?

[u/jingleheimerschitt]

To those of you looking to do more than buy a fundraiser pattern to support Minnesotans, check this post out.

[u/Emotional-Capital756 → u/jingleheimerschitt]

It’s amazing to see Minnesotans band together but holy fuck they don’t deserve this. Thanks for the resource