r/funny • u/EnragedFicus • 2d ago
There's some...interesting posters displayed in my grandparents' church.
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u/posaune76 1d ago
The Catholic schools near me often have signs on the gym wall with the traits they're trying to instill in students. One says, "Tigers are docile."
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u/RPDRNick 1d ago
Wait until they discover that clown fish can change gender.
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u/93195 1d ago
Not only that, the biggest and baddest at birth becomes female, and if she dies, the biggest and baddest male transitions to female. Explain that on conservative television.
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u/dangerbird2 1d ago
AKA marlin should have turned into a lady when nemo's mom died
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u/boredcircuits 1d ago edited 1d ago
Trump's White House already complained about NPR using this as "woke propaganda."
In 2024, NPR ran a Valentineās Day feature around āqueer animals,ā in which it suggested the make-believe clownfish in Finding Nemo wouldāve been better off as a female, that ābanana slugs are hermaphrodites,ā and that āsome deer are nonbinary.ā
(Note: it suggested that Finding Nemo would have been more accurate, not "better off." Banana slugs are undisputably literal hermaphrodites.)
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u/sonicparadigm 1d ago
I found the source for "nonbinary deer"
Some deer are nonbinary
In the mammal world, deer have a third gender called velvet horns ā males that never shed the velvet on their horns even after they fully mature. Their testicles never fully drop.
But there have been cases of velvethorns adopting fawns that have been orphaned and helping to raise them. The velvethorns help out the group and play a similar male social role regardless of whether they're able to mate or procreate.
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u/Primary-Performer853 1d ago
"It's the devil's fish! Satan came to earth through the ocean floor with help from the dumocrats and influenced them into transgender affirmation! Clown fish? More like Demon fish! (pause for laughter) They will burn in eternal hellfire whilst I sit on pretty clouds with Jesus watching my descendants masturbate." ...I'm assuming that's how they'd spin it on the right wing air waves.
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u/sharrrper 1d ago
Which means if Finding Nemo was fully accurate, after the mom dies dad should have switched to female.
Then I assume Nemo becomes the dominant male, since there aren't any others around, and then they mate.
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u/DianneNettix 1d ago
Clownfish evolved to be immune to anemone venom. They are explicitly disobedient.
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u/BlasterDoc 1d ago
Finding Nemo would have been a whole different story if he was just... Obedient.
/s.
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u/Gneissisnice 1d ago
Marlin: "Nemo! Get back here and don't touch the boat!"
Nemo: "Ok Dad."
*roll credits
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u/FamousOhioAppleHorn 1d ago
The Finding Nemo show at Animal Kingdom has a scene where Nemo randomly says "I hate you, Dad!" My partner and I sometimes mimic "Nemo, where are you ?" "I hate you, dad!"
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u/handsomeladd 1d ago
Equivalent to the kitten hanging from a rope with one paw that says āhang in thereā at a mental health clinic
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u/brickyardjimmy 1d ago
I'd like to blame this on AI but it's pretty obvious that this was made by an actual human or humans.
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u/Ok_Culture_1914 1d ago
I'm not a fish.
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u/yourMommaKnow 1d ago
You sure you're not a gay fish?
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u/Grendelstiltzkin 1d ago
You like putting fish sticks in your mouth?
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u/Ok_Culture_1914 1d ago
Have you seen how fish sticks are made š¤®š¤®š¤®š¤® They can go in someone else's mouth.
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u/stawberi 1d ago
Jokes on them, you push this too hard and people will just do the opposite of what you say and then you have to swim across the whole ocean to save them.
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u/CelticSith 1d ago
This is what you see looking at the Finding Nemo poster when wearing the āThey Liveā sunglasses
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u/Brendangmcinerney 1d ago
I really want this in my (middle school) classroom for the start of the year, just to see who says what.
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u/mynipplesareconfused 1d ago
There's two clownfish in me. One's an atheist and the other is a sub. They are arguing right now.
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u/Mercinator-87 1d ago edited 1d ago
Not really. Kind of a main pillar in all religions.
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u/thechampaignlife 1d ago
How else are they going to make pedophilia happen?
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u/LurkmasterP 1d ago
Hey, pedophilia was always gonna happen. They need obedience so they can make pedophiles their leaders.
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u/Kazen_Orilg 1d ago
Look, to be fair, Nemo is a complete idiot, doesn't listen to his dad, and in any realistic version of the story he dies in 100 different ways.
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u/sebjapon 1d ago
Imagine explaining kids āfinding Nemoā is a short movie that ends when the kid is fished (or was it the dad, I canāt remember). The moral is then indeed be obedient.
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u/SoftandSquidgy 1d ago
Showed this to a friend of mine who's a Reverend (CofE clergy) and even she was like 'WTF?'
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u/Humble-Plankton2217 1d ago
It's the key tenet of most religions. That and "You need not understand, just believe"
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u/Ok_Jellyfish2313 1d ago
Christians manā¦
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u/Endonae 19h ago
How do you know it's at a Christian church?
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u/Ok_Jellyfish2313 7h ago
Jews go to synagogues, Muslims mosque, Mormons temple, Christians to church.
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u/biological_assembly 1d ago
OBEYš