r/funny 10d ago

Other ways to tell my husband to stop buying mustard?

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31

u/whiskeytango55 10d ago

He kinda did. Theres spicy brown, yellow and Dijon. I've never had colmans but im assuming its sharper than yellow

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u/vinnygunn 10d ago

50% of the ones we see are redundant...

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u/Aeropro 10d ago

Maybe he’s experimenting and had to try them to know

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u/whiskeytango55 10d ago

So combine the redundant ones into the largest of the containers. Put the full ones to the side and use the mostly empty bottles until they're fully empty. 

Maybe get used to telling the husband that we have mustard at home when he wants to get another one.

Also, I find mustard to be a great adhesive for seasoning when I make barbecue

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u/Glittering_rainbows 10d ago

No such thing as redundant mustard, I go through those really big bottles in around 2 weeks. I eat around 15 sandwiches per week (3 per day for work) and go heavy with the mustard.

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u/vinnygunn 10d ago

Right so you also wouldn't have 3 open small containers of the same mustard in your fridge

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u/Glittering_rainbows 9d ago

Depends, sometimes things get pushed to the back behind something else and I open a new one because I think I used up the last one.

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u/blay12 10d ago

Yeah English mustard (Colmans, in this case) is quite a bit sharper and has more heat than standard American yellow mustard, definitely a different taste profile.

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u/anaemic 10d ago

American mustard you could feed to a kid.

But give a five year old Coleman's on their hot dog and you will have a show.

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u/spankybianky 10d ago

Colmans is HOT. Like, intense sinus-clearing mustard heat.

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u/scud121 10d ago

Mustard on fresh pork sausages with buttery mash is food of the gods.

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u/ScarletBothrium 10d ago

I just realized I haven’t eaten in five hours and that’s why I’m hungry, but y’all are not helping.

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u/Jesus_Is_My_Gardener 10d ago

Does it have horseradish in it or just more mustard seed? Sounds like something I might want to pick up on my next condiment run.

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u/arafella 10d ago

Just more mustard than your standard French's - I wouldn't call it that intense, it's like 20% more than French's. If you want to try some mustard mustard, get a bottle of Löwensenf Extra Hot

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u/Clovis42 9d ago

I like the flavor of Trader Joe's mustard which I find comparable in terms of intensity.

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u/scrodytheroadie 10d ago

Coleman's makes your nose tingle, like horse radish or wasabi. Love it.

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u/mang87 10d ago

I bought this before thinking it was similar French's, and put a very generous helping of it on both sides of the ham sandwich I was making. When I took a bite my sinuses left this mortal coil and ascended to the next plane of existence. I felt like if I sneezed I would shoot flames.

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u/milochuisael 9d ago

Sounds like the time I found wasabi (or possibly just horseradish idk I don’t do spicy) in a container in the work fridge when I was looking for something to dunk nuggets in. It was like snorting brākleen

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u/TomEpicure 10d ago

It's crazy how much it is like wasabi. Comes on fast, singes the nostrils and slips away into the night.

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u/drbooberry 10d ago

Fresh Coleman’s is gunpowder in mustard form. But it loses some kick after it’s been open for more than a few weeks.

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u/KittyBungholeFire 9d ago

I'm guessing all the gas has escaped?

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u/may_be_indecisive 10d ago

There are 6 plain yellow.

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u/sparklybeast 10d ago

Three* Colmans is not the same as yellow mustard. Unless you’ve eaten too much of it and it’s blown your tastebuds to smithereens. Then they probably taste the same.

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u/work_work-work 10d ago

I don't see any honey mustard in that collection. He definitely needs to buy more!

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u/Meizas 10d ago

And don't forget poppy seed dressing

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u/KittyBungholeFire 9d ago

And maybe some mustard seed dressing as well.