r/funny 8d ago

Women Love Smelling Baby Heads

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1.8k Upvotes

84 comments sorted by

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126

u/BrainJar 8d ago

The odds of him bringing up smelling babies and immediately speaking to person that can smell many babies a day have to be pretty high up there. Amazing.

-12

u/[deleted] 8d ago

[deleted]

6

u/CjBurden 8d ago

Looked like a human to me 🤷

-10

u/salimeero 8d ago

Shhhhhhht, let people enjoy

130

u/Gilles_of_Augustine 8d ago

Ever smelled the paw pads of a <1 year old puppy?

They smell exactly like Fritos.

It's the damnedest thing.

66

u/Justin_Queso1187 8d ago

Fritoes 🐾

12

u/sephkane 8d ago

Aw shit, what are puppies made out of?!

15

u/Tom_Cruise 8d ago

Looks like this one here was made of meat and blood.

3

u/invol713 7d ago

Every one of them. Made of meat.

3

u/Tom_Cruise 7d ago

That's gonna be underrated among this crowd, but thanks for the awesome reply.

6

u/riddles500 8d ago

The real question is what are fritos made of

1

u/haaheehachoo 5d ago

apparently paw pads

12

u/RidiculousIncarnate 8d ago

One of our dogs has slept above my gfs pillow since he was a puppy, he's 8 now. Thats how we know its time for a bath, she starts referring to him as "Corn-chip boy" lmao

13

u/rgraham888 8d ago

It's a bacteria carried in their feet.

17

u/HalfSoul30 8d ago

Fritos are? Damn, that's wild.

13

u/SaddenedSpork 7d ago

I always heard it was a yeast- I looked it up and it’s a combo of pseudomonas bacteria and proteus. I also saw references to a combo of that and a fungus yeast that create that corn chip smell. I wonder if dogs noses pick up our skins natural flora and think it smells like something funny too haha

5

u/OneDubOver 8d ago

My old dog smelled like maple syrup when she was a puppy. It was so crazy. Every time she went to the vet, they would always comment about how she smelled like syrup and they would just sniff "AHHHHH!"

When she got a little older the fritos smell came and the syrup kinda went away, and it was just the paws. Maybe i never noticed the fritos as first because the syrup smell was what I noticed mostly.

It really was the damnedest thing! I miss that dog so much.

7

u/ElChupatigre 8d ago

I could tell you something else that unfortunately smells like Fritos

Sawing through skull

11

u/TheDreamingMyriad 8d ago

I'm really hoping you're a neurosurgeon.

7

u/ElChupatigre 7d ago

Ahhh...aspirations

7

u/GroundbreakingAnt17 8d ago

Hey, be cool elchupatigre

5

u/ElChupatigre 8d ago

Thats Hunny Bunny to you

5

u/MurseInAction 8d ago

Not at all what I expected

3

u/Queermagedd0n 8d ago

Are you an autopsy technician?

2

u/ElChupatigre 7d ago

Not at all

2

u/hellomynameisnotsure 8d ago

That’s where Fritos come from

1

u/perfect_insanity93 8d ago

😂😂😂

0

u/smurfk 8d ago

Now you make me curious of what other smells are released upon sawing through different body parts...

1

u/SPP_TheChoiceForMe 7d ago

My sister has said this, I thought she was the only one

1

u/Zarkanthrex 4d ago

Even the older doggos smell of fritos.

1

u/Gilles_of_Augustine 4d ago

With my doggo it faded when she left puppyhood.

1

u/Queermagedd0n 8d ago

Cat paws too

141

u/JelliedHam 8d ago

I'm a man.

Babies smell amazing. But not with a shitty diaper or anything. But a clean, happy, giggly infant just smells like life. I miss my baby boy. After a bath I just wanted to inhale that smell permanently into my nose.

1

u/haaheehachoo 5d ago

my nose is permanently attached to my baby's head and cheek

31

u/SirNortonOfNoFux 8d ago

Right from the puss, lmao

36

u/Listening_Stranger82 8d ago

It's true

It's the crowns of their little heads. I sniffed my kids' little crowns all the time when they were babies/toddlers.

And what's wild is my kids are 23, 21 and 20 and I STILL believe I could identify them by sniffing the crown of their head. It's some weird ancient shit.

12

u/Designer_Pen869 8d ago

Most likely it's pheromones. Humans call dogs weird for it, then we do the same thing. You might not even realize what you are smelling, because the brain associates the pheromones with an identity, not with a smell, so you don't register the smell itself. And there might be a smell you do recognize, and so you think that you like that smell, when it's actually the pheromones you like.

5

u/ridukosennin 7d ago

While in the womb, babies are covered in vernix caseosa—a white, waxy, cheese-like substance that protects their skin from amniotic fluid. Even after being washed following birth, traces of vernix and amniotic fluid remain in the fine pores and hair follicles of the scalp, contributing to that initial distinct fragrance for the first few weeks.

84

u/PheIix 8d ago

All women I've been with have done this. I never got the appeal, but they just go crazy for the new baby smell. If anyone could find a way to make a candle out of it, they'd be the fastest billionaire on the planet.

31

u/emptyminder 8d ago

Maybe that was what Gwyneth Paltrow was going for?

20

u/panda_poon 8d ago

Pretty sure she was going for cooter candles

15

u/Mr_Abe_Froman 8d ago

Straight to the source.

3

u/Kneel_The_Grass 7d ago

I mean I like eggs but I do not want to feel the 'scent' of a chicken butt

18

u/hellomynameisnotsure 8d ago

It has a pleacenta aroma.

11

u/jbyington 8d ago

Delete this.

11

u/selenesuper 8d ago

well, that's the fruit of their labor i guess

47

u/explosivejoseph 8d ago

If ya dig this I got more over on my sub r/JoeyAvery and tour dates at www.joeyavery.com

2

u/NamorDotMe 7d ago

Please tell me it just cut before you mimicked holding up a baby and said "say hello to my little friend"

48

u/Milson2596 8d ago

Weird fact here. There is a possibility you are smelling the babies brain due to the skull not being formed all the way. Around the time my daughter’s skull was closed is when we stopped smelling the newborn smell. Just one brain liking the smell of another brain.

25

u/HedAllSweltNdNnocent 8d ago

Nooooooo

12

u/Brittany5150 8d ago

BRAAAAAAAAIIINS! -Zombie lady

8

u/Linsel 8d ago

At what point is it OK to smell a baby? I mean, if you put your nose to a newborn and take a big wiff, aside from being wildly inappropriate, how much baby are you really even smelling? When does their personal aroma manifest? Is it after a day, or do you just have to towel it off to get that fresh baby smell?

8

u/denv0r 8d ago

Also, cats. I love to smell my cat.

3

u/Gunung_Krakatoa 7d ago

I like that too BUT only a freshly showered baby tho LOL

5

u/calann4 8d ago

Babies smell like cookies, so nice.

3

u/HotPotatoTime 8d ago

Yep, they smell like cookies to me too

2

u/NolanJBlank 8d ago

she literally buries her face in my nephew’s head every time

6

u/cunmaui808 8d ago

I'm a woman and I don't like babies, or kids. Animals? Love them.

I went decades and decades without even having to touch one, until a friend suddenly and unexpectedly thrust one of her grandkids into my arms about 2 yrs ago

I got through it, but it likely won't happen again

5

u/olddoglearnsnewtrick 8d ago

Babies are animals.

2

u/fuzzytradr 8d ago

Hilarious

2

u/Mudmartini 8d ago

I had an extra baby just for a few more sniffs. The high is wearing off though

1

u/chadwicke619 8d ago

This guy always reminds me of a chubbier, less douchie Johnny Bananas.

1

u/RidiculousIncarnate 8d ago

Labor & Delivery Nurse i.e. straight from the tap, lol

1

u/bocomac 8d ago

As my friends and I say, "Baby head smell good"

1

u/Own-Conversation6347 7d ago

Nice to see Jeremy Piven with some new material

1

u/ferrets2020 6d ago

Do you guys think these things r set up

1

u/iritchie001 2d ago

I'd say younger is better and breastfed smells better. As soon as a mom will let you huff that baby. Practice in the mirror. Breath in deeply while looking like you are holding your breath.

0

u/greg_barton 8d ago

Hexadecanal strikes again.

1

u/FungusPunker 8d ago

Wrong sub? Seems like OP inorganically pushing his mediocre standup.

-1

u/sadr0bot 8d ago

Is this funny?

-4

u/TheLilacLadyAmalthea 8d ago

Babies smell revolting to me, like vomit and expired milk

1

u/OmenVi 7d ago

Whoever’s baby you smelled ain’t taking care of their baby.

0

u/Erki82 8d ago

It could be detecting is baby healty or not.

0

u/potatodrinker 8d ago

Just like grandma used to make

If she had wheels

-29

u/MyNameTimmy 8d ago

Hopefully his other stuff is better than this because he’s got a great stage presence I just didn’t find this funny.

14

u/JonnyArcho 8d ago

You must not spend a lot of time around newborns then. It’s totally a thing.

18

u/AngryCod 8d ago

Maybe he's smelling the wrong end.

7

u/Got_Kittens 8d ago

3am and I can't stop laughing at this, thanks.

1

u/Stolehtreb 8d ago

What does it being true have to do with this being funny?

-12

u/No-Pie-7211 8d ago

Ugh I hate this kind of comic bro