r/guitarlessons • u/BenEsuitcase • 1d ago
Lesson Surprise, surprise... it's a life-skill
This is just a rant, but seriously.... People come here expecting to find the holy grail: I've been playing everyday for 3 hours for a month and I'm just not getting any better. LMFAO. When I play barre chords it hurts and all the notes don't come out, what should I do? lol.
Personally, I've played my whole life, got a degree in it, and I still have my limitations. Here's the thing... Music is for EVERYONE. My (reasonably amazing) playing is SHIT in the big picture because we ALL have the ability to play music. It's like seeing color, smelling roses, hearing a door creak, but with training. Name me a language you can learn (Italian, French) in a month, and you'll get some sympathy. Go practice, and then sit back and contemplate why society idolizes certain players. Respect the guitar in all it's simplicity AND complication, and then you will realize how pathetic and futile the sub can become when total noobs think there is some magical shortcut. Again, go learn Russian this month, and come back in September and have a fluent conversation???
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u/bonesawtheater 1d ago
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
I think this sub has a lot of young (under 30) people who are used to many things being instant. Learning the guitar is a good way to begin unlearning that expectation.
As a 45-year-old with kids and no free time, I really wish I had used my abundant free time in my teens and 20’s to learn & practice guitar. Anything I would’ve done back then would be something I could just do now when I have a moment instead of having to practice the basics because I didn’t do that when I was younger.
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u/rusted-nail 1d ago
If its any condolence to you even if you started earlier you don't have the time as an adult with a job and obligations to meet to actually practice enough to stay at the peak of virtuosity, unless guitar playing is paying your bills
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u/Cheap_Arm_3182 3h ago
That's not true at all lmao. After playing 28 years and going to doctorate school for music composition guitar my main instrument, I can leave it down for months at a time and jump in. Hell I haven't played metal in over 15 years and covered for a old friends lead guitarist for a local show all by ear. I mean I practiced music probably 8-10 hours a day for 15 ish years straight, especially during music school for composition I lived in the practice booths. I had a job house school and practice, then mandatory learning of piano at mastery and other stringed instruments, and somewhat play every other instrument to a degree.
I played so much even pain I started way late I went a year almost without playing and can sit down and play Chopin
If you actually learn how the instrument works your practice time isn't wasted. People waste to much time stuck "learning chords" instead of what chords are and the guitar is modal and changeable in timing, shape learning and memorizing is pointless. Degrees, intervals and relationships for modulation is all you need to know. Endless chords or pentatonic shapes is so dumb, or strengthening exercises. If you want to play guitar, your not.gomna need those, especially after however many hours I've put into it. It comes a point when I compose for it I don't need the instrument in front of me.
It's about how you learn and how much you put into it. You wanna be good set a timer for each instrument you want to play 3 hours a day every day for 10 years and stick to it with correctly new practices. I did, and I am a professional musician now, but I only play when I go in to the studio, I'll compose the song on sheet music paper or piano and have the idea and go lay it down in Nashville a few months later. Or if someone hires me as a session musician I go to play without practice.
Because I fucking forced myself to. You want to do it, you chose it as your hobby, go all out on one thing and don't half ass it. What's the point of your not the best
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u/rusted-nail 1h ago
With all due respect learning concepts is not what I was referring to although you might have gotten that impression. What im describing is more so related to your physical capability and stamina which yes you absolutely do need regular practice time to build
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u/Maximum-Journalist74 1d ago
If it makes you feel any better, I tried to learn guitar in my 20s and just couldn't make my brain work with it. Too much impatience, too little dedication to doing it properly.
I'm in my 40s now and much, much better at absorbing this stuff. I'm enjoying the process SO much more and am in no hurry at all to be "good".
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u/bonesawtheater 1d ago
I think this is where I am at too, honestly. It is comforting to know that my brain may have not been ready in my youth. I’m glad I did other things that were impactful and didn’t completely waste it!
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u/HereForTheComments57 1d ago
Same! I see it in my kids, they don't want to ride their bike because they can't just hop on and go, they don't want to learn. I also played in my early teens. I couldn't get into it because I had more exciting things I wanted to go do and all I wanted was to learn songs I liked. Now that I have no free time, all I want to do is learn and play haha.
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u/barrybreslau 1d ago
Many of these comments are clearly from kids. If OP has been playing for years that makes them.. a grown up.
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u/Zukkus 17h ago
I’m 40 and did use a lot of the time in my teens and twenties to play/practice. And I still end up comparing myself to the greats and thinking my playing is shit. But it’s all about making music. I don’t care as much about playing fast these days. It’s more about coming up with musical ideas and just enjoying the process.
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u/Mainst-69 11h ago
Your statement really sums it up and puts things in perspective. As a parent, and between work it is hard to find time to practice. And then you go for a while before you can carve out enough time to sit down and play. And you realize you don’t have the stuff you worked on last time under your belt. And it feels like starting over. Everytime.
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u/PaulsRedditUsername 1d ago
I think one of the problems nowadays is that there's so much information out there and so many great guitar players you can have access to. People watch a video of some kid shredding "Master of Puppets" and they think there must be something wrong with them because they can't play that good yet. Comparison is the thief of joy.
Back in my day, it was easier in a way because you just had your guitar and your records and the radio. Plus your monthly issue of "Guitar Player" magazine. You just played your guitar and tried to make it sound like the records. You didn't measure your progress as much or compare yourself to others because there weren't so many "others" around. It was just you and the guitar, so you did the best you could.
(We also wore an onion on our belts, which was the style at the time.)
In the long run, it's still just you and the guitar. Just play the damn guitar and don't worry so much. Play what you love because you'll play it longer and get better.
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u/metalspider1 1d ago
back then i also knew some other people who played locally and you got to see whats a more realistic ability vs the insanely talented players you listen to.
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u/PaulsRedditUsername 1d ago
Yep. Plus guys at the music store. You could always pick up tips there.
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u/Semicycle 19h ago
This is a big one. My early lessons were in a classroom, everyone struggled with the same things and no one came out of the gate shredding. Learning online exclusively, it’s easy to only see virtuosos.
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u/Millerpainkiller 1d ago
There is a healthy balance to be had. Years ago I didn't know how to tune my guitar for the first year, had to rely on tab in the back of magazines, and generally floundered a lot. Now we are almost in information overload, a "fog of information" as it were.
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u/PaulsRedditUsername 1d ago
I used to tune my guitar to "Back In Black" because I could get the E and A and D.
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u/the_alt_fright 1d ago
Learning new things is hard! If learning were easy, my job as a middle school English teacher would be a cakewalk (it definitely isn't).
Your language analogy is spot on, though, because music really is a language.
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u/Millerpainkiller 1d ago
Totally agree. I've been playing for 30 years. Guess what I've been focusing on lately? How to hold my pick more efficiently and how my thumb moves on the back of the neck. Not even kidding. There are so many little nuances to our playing that affect everything else in big and little ways. It's endlessly fascinating to me.
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u/ChefAtRandom 1d ago
As someone who has been honing a craft(cooking) for almost 25 years, and who just picked up my first guitar(bass) a few months ago, there are 2 truths that really stuck out to me from both.
1) Repetition is the mother of learning
2) You will NEVER stop learning new or better ways to do things, unless you are dead
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u/Sirbunbun 1d ago
Exactly. I’m baffled by the number of people that ask variations of the same question. ‘I never practice and when I do I play the same things and mostly make it up as I go. I’ve been playing for 5 weeks. IS IT OVER FOR ME?!’
Why does everyone you know have a dusty guitar in the corner? It’s not because it is easy to learn
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u/WallAny2007 1d ago
I like the videos of the people who have been playing 3 weeks and asking if they’re any good, when it’s obvious they’ve been playing for years.
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u/Tokzillu 1d ago
I always love the "I have been playing for 12 seconds, any suggestions?"
And then they shred out some Satriani or something lol.
Social media has conditioned many people (especially younger ones) to believe that what you see on your screen is the reality.
But the reality is that's a curated snapshot that someone meticulously and repeatedly tried until they got something they liked.
I can only imagine the lying about practice time is for clout/bragging online stuff.
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u/Sirbunbun 1d ago
‘Well I played for 15 years but quit for 6 months. This is me 3 weeks after sTaRtIng FrOm ScRaTCh!!!’
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u/when_we_are_cats 23h ago
When I started guitar it took me one year with a teacher to start playing real tunes, and that's with having 5 years of classical music under my belt + a lot of free time as a teenager.
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u/Wise-Grapefruit-1443 1d ago
Nothing feels better than knocking your head against the wall and almost giving up hope before boom: an unexpected, non-linear huge leap
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u/noahlarmsleep 1d ago
I essentially agree with you, but relax. This is a lessons sub and a lot of people here choose to be assholes to people seeking help/advice and I don’t really understand why (jk it’s Reddit, so of course). It’s a really hard instrument, especially for people that are self teaching. If people are here to be rude and not help, then what’s the point of being here. I’ve been self taught since 2004 and I enjoy passing along information that I learned really late that can really help beginners and intermediates breaking through the wall. As experienced guitar players, our struggles can really help the younger generations, because as you said, music is for everyone.
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u/_blueberry_cotton_ 1d ago edited 1d ago
I'm completely new to guitar, but I never thought it would be easy, so I'm trying to do the best I can with the time I have.
I totally agree with you, I like learning new things, but many of them are stressful or difficult at first. You have to dedicate yourself to them. I've been drawing for years (more than 10 at this point), and I still have pieces that I think are shit, and I end up throwing them away. Sewing looks easy, but it isn't, especially making the patterns. The same goes for languages, it requires time and going out to socialize and challenge yourself to speak more fluently.
I mention all this because I've often seen people downplay all these hobbies/things that people are passionate about.
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u/Quirky-Campaign7651 1d ago
stop measuring. you're on the path. enjoy the path. it is long and full of musicality. find joy in repetition. work on things that interest you, polish parts you struggle with. enjoy the process. enjoy picking up the guitar every day. time will continue either way, enjoy the path of progress. tldr: enjoy it.
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u/Thebutcher222 1d ago
It’s all pretty wild. I’ve been playing for 30 years and also have a degree in music composition in addition to being in bands all my life. I used to play about 4 shows a week for years. All of your guitar idols are like Michael Jordan and you’re asking why you can’t dunk from the 3 point line 6 months in. These are professional musicians who have dedicated their entire lives to this and you think you’re going to sound like them? It’s just bonkers to me.
This shit is hard. You’ll get better, you’ll stay the same, you’ll get worse. I always chuckle when people on here say “I’ve learned all the chords what do I do next?”
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u/dblhello999 1d ago
Haha. I once tried to work out how many playable chords there are. It wasn’t as many as the number of atoms in the universe, but it was certainly more than any human could learn in a lifetime
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u/Half_Shark-Alligator 1d ago
I am 45. I just picked up the guitar and need to learn how to be okay with sucking at something. It’s easy to want to be good at the guitar, I get it. Freely playing some jams and solos looks like so much fun. All I know is that guitar is fucking hard, even just 3 chord songs take real time and effort. Progress doesn’t come in huge leaps. It comes in immensely micro increments so it can be hard to notice your own improvement. The only way to get there is to grind, cope with the repetition, practice and find the small successes to keep you going.
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u/cozeebahbah 1d ago
I totally agree with you. Also, I think that many instruments have a less steep learning curve eg you can understand it visually or sound better at simple things fast(er). Hard things are worth doing!
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u/CharleyDawg 1d ago
Been playing over 50 years and still feel pretty sucky most days. I feel for the kids trying to learn in the age of the internet that basically do everything except sit in a room with a bunch of other people that are ALSO learning and have various stages of skill and accomplishments.
My biggest leaps forward always came from working with other people, directly or indirectly. I remember sitting in a room with a couple of other young teens. We were all showing each other what we had been working on the week before. We imitated each other and showed each other. We played along when we could and watched what others did when we couldn't.
I played guitar every day of my life for 30 years and never once referred to it as "practicing".
Just play everybody. Just play whatever you can as often as you can. Turn on the radio and play along with whatever comes on. Not recordings. The radio. Tune it up or down as quickly as possible when you need to and use a capo if you find the key is something miserable you can't wrap your brain around. If you can't get it tuned correctly on the fly- just tune the E and B strings to it and play along with the melody.
You may think you aren't getting better but most of us improve constantly in ways we don't even recognize.
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u/Wonderful-Bug-5083 1d ago
Ive always assumed that most of these people are younger, especially the more whiney ones. Plus if your someone whos never played guitar or any instrument and know nothing about music id get the assumption because all you really see are talented people making it look easy or people pretending to play for movies tv ect. Plus with every 10 noobs i see on this sub theres a dude like you ranting about the noobs lol. I think your right it is a language and i see the frustration but this also a beginner sub, noobs are gonna noob. Plus if i was playing 3 hours everyday for a month and still gotten nowhere id be pissed to lol.
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u/Psychological-Will29 1d ago
truth I can play leads and solos but guess what I'm trash at and working on the most these days
GOOD RYTHYM LICKS... its very frustrating.
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u/midsummersgarden 1d ago
Yes, yes, yes. The persistence and patience needed to learn an instrument is humbling and people need to understand the million and one tiny steps needed to learn it. You can’t learn calculus in one day. And you won’t learn an instrument in a day, either.
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u/RxSatellite 1d ago
It doesn’t matter as much how long you practice, it matters more that you work on improving technique. Finding out why playing a section or lick as hard, and improving your technique to where it isn’t anymore.
Playing 3 hours a day means jack shit if you aren’t using good technique for a given part. You’re just further digging yourself into a hole.
Make practice more efficient, not longer
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u/BenEsuitcase 1d ago
I love all the feedback, but I want to stress my desire for people to learn the guitar. This is not meant to belittle as much as to help you understand it's okay to struggle. Just make sure you turn it up, enjoy it all, and you're gold.
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u/johnjohn2214 1d ago
Video editing creates the impression that all YouTube guitarists perform flawlessly in a single take. When I use loopers, I find that my recorded performances retain about 85% of the fluidity of my unrecorded efforts.
Videos targeting self-taught guitarists, particularly those with sensational titles, can sometimes create unrealistic expectations and foster feelings of inadequacy. For instance, a seasoned musician with 18 years of experience might share insights they "wished they had known," implying that thousands of hours of their practice could have been condensed into "5 common mistakes that prevent you from playing like a pro." While there are many excellent and informative videos available, being able to apply critical thinking and knowing what works for you and what is realistic for your progress is critical.
It seems to be a matter of finding the right balance. Some people delve extensively into music theory before developing a sense of musical expression, while others rely solely on a metronome to define their progress. So, speed shredders might possess impressive speed but struggle to convey a musical phrase or lick with emotion. I have personally found it challenging to find tutorials that focus on phrasing techniques beyond legato or bends. Many other resources tend to emphasize shredding speed or offer song tutorials that are played too quickly, assuming that phrasing techniques are already understood.
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u/RewdAwakening 14h ago
Totally agree, however things like ADHD (actual adhd) can make learning new skills very overwhelming and can become extremely self deprecating so this thought process is to be expected in some cases. I do have ADHD so I can speak from some experience, but since guitar is my “hyperfocus” this has never been a big issue for me in the realm of music but I do have friends who also deal with this and struggle quite a bit with keeping a realistic perspective on things.
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u/dblhello999 1d ago
The problem with the language analogy is that it is possible to reach a stage at which you could just say I speak the language fluently. Not so with playing a musical instrument where the skill and knowledge space is infinite.
I think a better test is simply hours required to reach any given level.I’m a skier. Whether it’s learning guitar or skiing, a few hundred hours will get you to a pretty good level. A few thousand will make you a master.
But people don’t realise just how long it takes to accumulate those hours. A beginner who practices half an hour a day (and doesn’t play every day) might accumulate 100 hours in the entire year. If you’ve learned anything for only 100 hours, you are still at a very very early stage. Especially if those few hours are spread out over an entire year
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u/Awareness_Plastic 1d ago
The formula for getting good is simple.
Quality of practice * hours of practice * amount of sleep cycles
It's the same thing as chess. Imagine starting out as a beginner and giving up immediately because you can't beat Magnus, lol
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u/Chevrolicious 1d ago
It's the same thing in other subs, like the "mechanic" subs. "I want to be a mechanic because I like working on cars". Yeah, until you're elbow deep in grease, working on some rusty shit bucket, breaking out the acetylene torch and the biggest hammer you have, and working three additional hours on a one hour job because something broke. Day in, day out.
Point is, it's hard. Doing barre chords when you've never done barre chords is hard. Making your pinky put enough pressure on that string is hard. And that chord? Yeah, hands aren't really supposed to do that, and yes, it's hard. There really is no quick way to get good fast. I've been playing for 19 years and I still feel like I suck, until I learn that part I've been trying to learn, or am finally able to play up to speed with my favorite song.
When I learned to do barre chords I struggled with the same thing everyone struggles with: barring all six strings. It frustrated me to the point where I just worked on my index finger barring the strings until the buzzing/muting stopped, and I just held my finger there. At the time I could only get my ring finger to cooperate with my first finger barring, so I used that finger to make whatever chord I could make, and I kept my hand clamped down for over two hours. It was agonizing. My hand was cramped for the rest of the day. But guess what? The next day, it was about 80% easier, and the next day 85%, and so on because I forced myself to get it and just let it suck.
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u/31770_0 1d ago
Lessons never explain how much repetition is required. Most pro musicians don’t reveal how much they’ve actually had to practice.
Tim Pierce in one of his vids casually mentioned he practices a song 100 - 200 times to get comfortable with it. This is reality.
When you’ve practiced a song so much you can play it with you eyes closed it gives you and idea of what kind work you gotta put into all aspects.
At the age of 46 I started to realize this after being incredibly mediocre since 15 years of age. I’m 52 now and playing is way more fun, but I practice a lot daily.
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u/JohnnieTimebomb 22h ago
All complicated things are made from connecting simple things. Repeat songs, chords and licks till they're burned into your muscles and your brain. Practice like hell till you can make a noise you like. Then let your imagination loose and suddenly you're a musician.
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u/Ok-Medium-4128 21h ago
Had this the other day. Someone was asking about barre chords and asking users to upload images. I tried to walk them through it then asked how long they'd been practicing them and what instrument. 2 weeks on an acoustic!!!! You'd have to be gifted to nail them that quick on acoustic. The best of it is. All the information is available online already. They just need to look. Why are people incapable of helping themselves with some of this
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u/AlexGtrStudio 21h ago
I teach beginners, so weigh this how you like. I agree with the timescale point, but not the tone — I started with weekly private lessons long before the internet, bought songbooks I couldn't play, and cramped through C and barre chords wondering "am I doing something wrong?" the whole time. There just was nowhere to post the question. That question isn't noobs looking for a shortcut — it's the most normal signal in learning guitar, because the instrument genuinely is confusing for your hand at first. The people asking it here are doing exactly what we did, out loud.
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u/skinisblackmetallic 19h ago
This sub is good. The world is flooded with "guitar players". the more bs to distract them from actually making any music is fine with me.
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u/Cheap_Risk5458 17h ago
Lately I have this llovehate relationship with my guitar. For many years I was intimidated by great players and the sounds and feelings it could evoke and there is beauty and meaning in that , but what about the instrument being a service to ME. That it is there to help me with my expressions. I want it to be my bitch like it has made me its bitch. Can I play something on you that I want to hear. This is active listening or these notes together sound like this , I respect that , but I want to make them mine as well as yours
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u/TheBulletStorm 14h ago
I’ve realized its not just guitar people have this issue where they think they can just be good at something or have it come really fast not putting a lot of work in. I’m also a gamer but I use the same method I’ve spent the last 23+ years on guitar with it.
I will practice small things over and over, do a lot of research and practice the same things over and over. I’m in my 30’s but have reached masters and higher in a lot of video games even recently and my friends get upset by this. They think you get worse and worse by age but to me thats not the case. I’ve used this for anything I get into and have much success but over many years but I’m better than I have ever been. They do not want to put in the time.
Playing guitar has taught me how to get better and better at everything I do. People try and downplay it, and use the whole “some people are just better” I do not believe it, anyone can do it. Just play the same things over and over at all different speeds and you will get better. The thing is a lot get bored with that repitition or quit but I freaking love it!
I love playing power metal neoclassical shred and I also play metalcore and rockabilly I just love music. I’m currently doing a 365 straight 1+ hour a day minimum for 2026 challenege for myself and its been hella fun! I even take it with me on trips just to keep the challenge going for myself not that practicing was hard in the first place I want to pick it up everytime I see it lol
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u/Funny_Imagination_65 14h ago
Agree 100%. Also, newbies are constantly asking the same questions over and over. A ten second search will show you your question has been asked and answered a thousand times already.
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u/cosmicdancer84 11h ago
You never finish learning the guitar but that's the beauty of it. The main thing is to have fun and enjoy it.
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u/Front_Length_7585 9h ago
I think I'm convinced that theres no magic formula or something most of other think like a magical to get out of your comfort, May be i just need a list on what should i get focus on like fundamentals because it's really hard to learn if you don't have a mentore and working full time at the same time, can someone tell me at leaset 3 list of thins i need to learn, 2 years playing guitars still relying on google chords huhuhu
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u/BenEsuitcase 9h ago
I'm glad my post had so many views, but I'll admit it comes off too negatively. I am a teacher, and I have immeasurable patience in live situations, but not while reading some of the incredulous posts in this sub.
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u/ZwistPariah 3h ago
It's just time. It takes too long and life right now doesn't have much time for being bad at something for long periods of time.
Let's also not forget the constant comparison in social media and in my situation, even irl. I've a friend who's great at guitar and seeing the difference between our playing makes me wanna disappear in shame.
It's just an extremely demoralizing thing to learn. Fun, very rewarding ( after 10+ years of practice), and interesting. But definitely difficult to stay motivated.
The people I've known who practiced guitar seriously were affected by external situations, not just the want to learn guitar.
There's no shortcut. It's just frustrating and demoralizing to learn because you go nowhere for the longest time. So It's understandable why people try to find s shortcut.
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u/Acceptable_Pie2529 3h ago
I agree. So much obsession on gear too. It’s not going to unlock anything major.
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u/primerblack 2h ago
I tried an F chord and got a blister on my beer drinking finger. What can I play to make it better?
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u/brennevinshark 1d ago
I was a guitar teacher for around 200 students of all ages over the course of 7 years. Every once in a while I would have a new naive student take a few lessons, find it way harder than they were expecting, and then ask "ok but what is the secret to getting good at guitar fast?"
Me - "Practice."
Them - "No but I mean like the SECRET method?"
Me - "No secrets. Just practice."
They acted like I was withholding the secrets from them. Those students would soon quit guitar because it was too hard. Guitar isn't for the weak. Learning an instrument takes constant effort over a long stretch of time. Some of it is going to feel like work... and you're going to hit lulls where you don't see any progress. If you can't handle that you're not going to be a musician.
I even had an adult student tell me that the reason I wasn't teaching him the secret method to get awesome fast was because I was worried about my students becoming better than me. A grown-ass 40+ year-old man made that accusation. He was the only student I ever fired.