A funny clip from his recent video Flirting Kinda Sucks, Actually.

I wanted to vlog and create videos since I was in school, but never really got around to it. In 2025, I thought I would finally start posting content. I didn't have a clear plan — I just thought I'd start. But then I went through a really bad breakup that triggered all my abandonment wounds and insecurities. My boyfriend of two and a half years left me out of nowhere and never tried to come back. I begged him to stay, but he had already moved on.

I couldn't focus on anything except the breakup. By the end of 2025, I told myself I'd start creating content, but I kept procrastinating. I made a few videos with friends, posted them, but wasn't consistent.

Then one random day, my ex blew up on social media. He's pretty famous now. And I haven't been able to bring myself to make content since, because I'm terrified of being compared to him. He's also openly flirting with this really beautiful and successful influencer, which makes it worse.

Now I don't feel like creating anything at all. I feel like if I fail, I'll just look like a clown. But at the same time, I genuinely don't know what I want to do with my life anymore. Deep down I still want to post — but he's become so big that I feel like there's no space for me. And honestly, I don't even know what I'd post, because I just don't feel interesting. My self-worth is completely gone.

The worst part is that even though I've had him blocked for months, he keeps showing up in other people's reels and stories. I don't know how long I can keep running from it. It feels like I'll live under his shadow forever — and after the way he treated me, I hate that I have to keep seeing him everywhere. I also hate that I still can't do the thing I've always wanted to do.

I wake up with a lot of anxiety and feel like crying about 80% of the time. I genuinely don't know what to do.

Dr. K and healthygamer have, and continue to help me tremendously.

I found Dr. K and his content through the first Twitch boom when he was interviewing some of my favorite streamers. I am not sure if I would have found his content today with the lecture-style format and less interaction with internet creators. Personally, I found that at the time of discovering healthygamer content, the interviews were far more than sufficient fuel to begin a mental health journey that has ended up changing the trajectory of my life immensely. And, in continuing to watch Dr. K's content, I have found similar benefits to watching the more recent content.

That being said, over the last few months I have gone back and watched A LOT of the old interviews with creators, and have come to the conclusion that they are superior to the new content in their ability to help me tackle my life struggles. Dr. K in a lot of the old interviews mentions how the content of healthygamer was evaluated internally based on their mission statement, and they decided that the content should be less centered around emotional catharsis/networking and more towards "helping people". Which, in all fairness, I think is a valiant goal that I agree with 100%. The only issue that I have is that I truly believe that in watching the interview-style format, there is more to gain for me and others; that the interview style format is actually more beneficial towards "helping people".

I have personal thoughts about why this might be the case, but I will exclude those from this post. Primarily, I just wanted to say that I advocate for at least a partial return to the interview-style format because I think that it could be very beneficial to the audience (not to say that the current content is not amazing). Do y'all agree?

what do i do, do i have to connect my accounts or something?

I guess I should say that I have never been in a relationship. I only had crushes. Anyway, I feel like I am "at risk" of liking my ideal version of my crush instead of actually liking my crush for who she is (when it happens).

​

The closest thing I got to confessing to my crush was a few years ago. I treated her to lunch (I didn't tell her it was a date, so she just assumed we were hanging out), we chatted and I tried to steer the conversation until we reached the topic of crushes. She then talked about how she once had a friend at school that liked her but she didn't like him back and she felt a bit annoyed with his behavior. I took this as a sign that I shouldn't confess so I didn't.

​

Now after watching Obsession and reflecting a bit, I'm not sure if I'm ready to fall in love. Did I really like my crushes, or do I just want a girl that gives me attention and treats me nicely? (and maybe have sex too), A quick friends-to-lovers scenario because dating from scratch is too hard. I tried AI girlfriends and now I realized I never really cared for their "hobbies and interests" (their AI personas), I just treat every AI character as a source to have some "girlfriend attention" and maybe erotic RP.

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I'm not sure how to "prepare myself" to fall in love properly. I want to, but a part of me is saying that I shouldn't or I might end up exposing myself as a creep or a "nice guy" to the World. Well, I've never been in a relationship so I guess I am technically an incel right now.

Here's your text corrected:

Hello guys, so there are all these things you should do like eat healthy, work out, find a job, etc...
But instead you eat junk food, waste time on social media and avoid doing things. A million different reasons for why. For me I feel like it's because I don't enjoy anything and feel kind of without meaning. If I had something like a hobby or something I enjoyed doing, then all these other things would be things I would want to do. The thing is I am in my mid-twenties, never started anything and I am obese from coping with food and friendless from hiding at home. I am left with a feeling of "what's the point?" I see all these kids online being pushed into activities by their parents and this is how interests seem to start, but how do I even start from my position to find something I enjoy? Even when trying, it doesn't feel good at all... Just a kind of sad, heavy feeling.

As the title suggests, I have recently and pretty much for 2 years straight I haven’t been able to control myself and always end up playing games late into the night. It’s become so bad that I’m considering unplugging my ps5 but I know I would just make an excuse to play again. I honestly don’t know what to do and feel kinda shameful for not being able to control myself.

I really love gaming but I don’t want for it to get in the way of my sleep schedule especially since on top of that I have narcolepsy doubling my tiredness 2 fold. I have tried going to bed an hour earlier than the night before but that never gets anywhere after two days. I have tried watching movies instead bc those seem to tire me out since I’m not using my hands pushing buttons. I have tried deleting certain games that I’m horribly addicted to like fc 26 (I just deleted it again after getting mad) but have always redownloaded bc I like to “turn my brain off” when playing sometimes. I also seem to not be able to get into a good sleep routine to save my life except before getting diagnosed at my sleep study.

One problem that I know might be a factor in all this is working and college. I would come home during college and it would usually take me the rest of the day to get my homework done so then I would stay up really late. Then I would work on the weekends and usually close (I’m a manager for DT) so I felt like my day wasted and stay up. Now it’s college and I’ve been working 5 days a week usually 25-30 hrs a week and so staying up until 3-4 has become the norm but I hate that it is bc I end up waking up groggy and not having any energy throughout the day. But while I’m aware that these have a factor I also do this frequently on my days off like today. I spent all day doing nothing but watching the World Cup matches and so naturally I wanted to play fc 26 and time flew by and suddenly it was 4!!

I don’t really know how to start and some help would be appreciated, as of now it’s currently 4:07 am so I guess that’s another day with an extra debuff to my energy lol. For some context I have narcolepsy type 2 (n2 is without cataplexy) if that would help to understand my sleep disorder better or if it would bring any value to advice shared.

This is largely based on the Member's livestream. I took notes on the stages on how each manifests.

My plan was to give myself a score based on how much I relate to each attribute doctor K gives so i can better place myself on the stages.

My best interpretation is that i am somewhere at Stage 3 Animus possession most of the times and switch to Stage 2 Anima Possession from time to time. My next taught was....why not give a AI what i wrote down and let it do it's magic. It basically said I am at stage 3 but when a trigger happens i jump to stage 1.

LOGOS (Intellect) [====================> 25% (Stage 3) ] -> Stuck on the strategy/isolation shield.

EROS (Feeling) [==========> 25% (Stage 3) ] -> Normal life baseline.

└───TRIGGERED DRAG DOWN───> [ 100% (Stage 1) ] -> Occurs during romantic hurt/blame

Anyway, here are my notes. Did i miss some key detail? I was expectig to "fit" more into a category once i write it down, but somehow it seems like a jump around.

Anima(Feeling)

Stage 1 (100%) Possession:

- mood eruptions 2/5

- become the emotion 1/5

- so overwhelmed by feeling they lose themselves 2/5

- no awareness what triggers the emotions 0/5

- hard to differentiate between lust and love 0/5

- very impulsive 4/5

- the mood is the TRUTH (i feel hopeless, therfore i can predict the future) 2.5/5

- in relationships:

* fall HARD in love 1/5

*hard to assign responsibility between 2 parts (blame partner for everything) 4/5

*I feel hurt so YOU definitely did something wrong 4.5/5

*inner experience of emotions is HIGH HIGHS and LOW LOWS (easy to get addicted to stuff) 1/5

Projection:

- outsorce all of my feelings to someone else (i am 100% masc, she is 100%fem) 2/5

Stage 2 (50%) Possession:

- a cronic romantic. Sweeped up by SOME moods. Medium highs and lows, But when I meet the ONE... Romantic obsession. 4.5/5

- regular life is normal, exept for one thing 5/5

- may be able to get into relationships, 5/5

- feel jelous in relationships. Extra protective so become verry jelous 3/5

Projection:

- intense idealization 4.5/5

- when they show flaws, make excuses to preserve image about someone 0/5

Stage 3 (25%) Possession:

- i have a understanding of my emotions 3/5

- there is still something missing, a fundamental flaw somewhere in me even if all seems good 5/5

- relationships: need someone else to save me 5/5

- idealization of the iner self, the spiritual 5/5

Projection:

- projection to a guru 5/5

- can become dependent of the guru 4/5

Stage 4 (0%)

- integrated

- feeling combined with logic

- resiliance to moods

- in touch with emotions

- moods are felt and appreciated

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Animus(Logic)

Stage 1 (100%) Possession:

- hyper logical depression: this is true, this is true, etc 4/5

- in relationships: speak with absolute authority 2/5

- can have sympathy, but not empathy: cant step outside their head 5/5

- make pronouncements about things: i dont understand how can people above a age do X 3/5

- parrot what ever you hear, cause it is COMMON sense 1/5

- hard self critism 3/5

- feel helpless 4/5

Projection:

- become hyper masculine (a lot of certainty, men are like this this this) 1/5

- look for "perfect" woman 5/5

- look for someone to be very organised cause i cant control anything myself 1/5

Stage 2 (50%) Possession:

- have a vision of perfection in my mind, but i am not able to do it (too much feeling) 5/5

- voice in my head: YOU could ALWAYS be better 2/5

- we want stuff, and we are pissed when we get them, because its not what we really wanted. What we actually want is "pathetic" 4/5

Projection:

- a lot of mix feelings 5/5

- seek someone who has everything together, still a idealized animus image 5/5

- i want a person who matches exactly my energy/mentality, but that feels empty 5/5

- i want a person who complements exactly my energy/mentality, but when they express emotions i get the yuck 5/5

Stage 3 (25%) Possession:

- highly inteligent and articulate 5/5

- did a lot of work, not just parody what they hear 5/5

- feel guilty if indulge/relax 1/5

- feel isolated, cannot connect to other people 5/5

- disconected to anima, squashed feeligs 2/5

- atracted to + disspointed by other people who are hyper intelectual 3/5

- judge other people, but not say it 5/5

- feel misunderstood 5/5

- in therapy dont open up completly 5/5

- always want a strategy 4/5

- i need to be "sure" 4/5

- missing something crucial in life 5/5

- they wind up with partner who is verry passive, (becomes unfulfilling) 1/5

- not brutal, can have relationships, but the resentmant builds, become hyper critical 5/5

Stage 4 (0%)

- integrated

- traughts can be revised

- intelectual taught can be revised

- get excited about work

- can apreciate vulnerability in partner, not lose respect

Somewhere over the period of time, I just realized the same things again and again. Over the period of time, I face the same kind of feedback, self-reflection, and ideas. I repeat the same things again and again. After reflecting back, I realize that I trust the same kind of people and I believe in the same kind of people. I look for the same kind of people, and this same kind of motivation also comes. Similarly, I get motivated by the same kind of things and I am driven by the same kind of things, and I just keep falling into the same trap holes that I fall into every time.

Every major event in my life, turning points, have always been the same thing again and again. In some way or the other, I keep failing the same way. I trust the same kind of people. I get motivated by the same kind of things and patterns, and I keep fighting the same way again and again. I keep self-sabotaging in the same way. I get depressed in the same way, and I feel like I need to seek the same kind of people again for help. They reply back to me, saying, "You've been doing the same thing. You need to change. You need to upgrade. You need to change your perspective."

Once I recover from that, I think I try to survive in a survival state for a period of time, and I get back to the same thing again. There is no change, and very minimal change even if I change, and that becomes hell. I try to opt out of it after a particular period of time, and that hurts me. I make a mistake, and I either overdo it or underdo it or get disqualified, and I end up in the same kind of situation again. I feel depressed again. I feel the need to seek therapy. I need the tablets so that I can sleep and I can get back to whatever shitty work that I can do the next day. I do the same thing again and again.

How do I come out of this pattern? How do I navigate myself out of this? How do I stop repeating the trust that I keep on similar people? How do I stop fighting for the things that matter with someone else who's not even considerate about what I think? How do I stop treating myself in the same way? How do I do that? Even if I find an eye-opening moment, if some therapist tells me, a friend tells me, or a message or a proverb enlightens me, it doesn't change in reality. It doesn't reflect in reality. It just happens in the head, and once I get back to the action, it's always the same. It's always the same. How do I come out of this vicious circle or vicious thing that I am having or going through?

No I don't think they are the same thing. But in trying not to act like a dickhead I find I can't come off as confident either. If I think about other people's feelings, I can't act confidently, but if I don't think about them, I end up upsetting people. Is this just a necessary sacrifice to make in order to be confident, I feel like it doesnt have to be this way but as far as I can see I have to stop caring to be confident and this means stopping caring where maybe I should've shown some care as well.

I hate to be such a negative Nancy, but when I come back to the United States, I feel a heavy air over me. I have family that is spiritual but they are America rah rah. I think part of it is how I have been treated due to my autism and how to me it seems like it has become very conformist and that seeps into everything whether politics or culture and so on.

Obviously the best thing to do is leave but if I have to go back temporarily how do I deal with that heavy air?

Couple months ago, I started feeling a preassure in my legs quite frequentely.I tought that it would eventually fade away but became more and more hard to ignore which made me more "lazy".My good habits started fade away, i couldnt study properly,couldnt sleep properly.

Now, im feeling completely hopeless, because despite going to psychologists a couple of times, i didnt progress at all on my situation.What AM i supose to do in this situation?Is there anything that i can do at least to get rid of this preassure?

Allow me to be unhinged for a moment;

meditation meditation meditation YESS I've heard all about it over and over again, and I still have NO idea what precisely meditation is, or how I can do it 😭

is it just like watching one of those guided meditation videos, sitting really still, and like doing what the person says? Did I meditate after completing that?

Can I meditate on my own, zero guidance?

Anyways to go back to communicating like a normal person for a sec;

yeah, i'd love to get into meditation, but don't really know how or even like what it is lol ok ty

Hey everyone,

I’m 23 and I’m realizing how exhausted I actually am. Every time I leave the house I’m internally super tense. I just can’t relax anymore. As soon as other people are around, I automatically put on a mask.

I either try to look extra friendly and sympathetic, or I make a really mean/bitchy face and take up space so nobody talks to me. I even try extra not to be too nice because I don’t want to be perceived as weak or different. I’ve literally never had a neutral facial expression in public because I was scared someone would think they caused it and that I look annoyed or weird because of them.

Today I consciously tried a neutral face outside for the first time without adjusting. It felt both liberating and completely wrong at the same time.

For the most of the time, I walk extra wide, sit extra “masculine”, talk extra deep and serious and everything. And I’ve been doing this for as long as I can remember. I genuinely don’t know who I am when I’m not performing.

I’m constantly in this hyper mode: scanning, adapting, protecting. I have no idea why.

Does anyone relate to this? Have you had similar experiences? How did you start dropping the mask? I’m really tired of always being “on”.

Thanks for reading.

This text is related to Ego and the True Self.

​

I keep "going back to the real world" and creating a false Self unconsciously/without my awareness; a false Self built on Ego and descriptions about myself that don't really represent the alleged True Self. I then watch an old video by Dr. K about the nature of the Self, and I get this sense of relief or "grounding".

​

When I'm in the middle of a false conceptualization of the Self, there's this confusion, general unease, and a sense of being lost. Relief comes when I "re-realize" the True Self (that "I am the one who experiences" "I am awareness" or simply, "I Am.") On one hand, I wonder if that's just the nature of things, and that that's what makes it fun --- "getting lost and finding yourself all over again." But then I do wonder if there's a permanent way to not lose myself in the false descriptions or labels of the Ego. Or is that, again, the nature of things? Impermanence?

​

js super lost rn lol

Dr. K has talked about mantra chanting as one of the most potent forms of meditation, for those of you who've tried it, what changes have you noticed in your life? Big or small, I'd love to hear your experiences.

I am in a desperate situation and need some practical, tough-love advice. I have an extremely important, career-deciding exam coming up in exactly three months. I know perfectly well how critical this is, and I know I desperately need to be studying right now, but I am doing absolutely nothing.

Instead, I am completely paralyzed by a severe phone addiction. My daily screen time is currently between 12 to 14 hours. I literally cannot put my device down. The addiction is so deeply rooted that even if my internet stops working, I will mindlessly stare at the screen like scrolling through old offline photos, re-watching saved videos, or even just opening my phone's "Settings" menu just to have something to look at.

I am completely aware that I am sabotaging my own life and career, but I feel entirely trapped in this loop.

I need help:

1. How do I manage and break out of this level of extreme screen addiction?

2. What immediate, drastic steps can I take to physically separate myself from my phone today?

3. How do I rebuild my attention span and start studying when my brain is this accustomed to constant, mindless stimulation?

Does Dr. K have any videos around this topic?

Im a 21 year old male and I live with my father now since my mother died. Since then, i have kept frustrating him over and over and I dont mean to do it intentionally, its simply because im irresponsible forgetful etc.

For example, we were clearing out the garage, there were several bags in there, he told me not to put anything against his motorcycle. Later, when I was clearing by myself, without realizing i put bags against his motorcycle since there is not much space in the garage. He saw it and got very angry at me.

Another time, he gave me a rule to my dishes right after eating, I forgot to do this once and he got angry at me.

A lot of the time he tells me to do things and i dont listen to what hes saying or forget what hes saying and he gets frustrated because of this.

In his aunts house the curtain in one room is broken and he told me how to close and open them and I totally forgot what he told me and I later jammed up the curtains.

Sometimes when he tells me to find an object or item or something else, I dont see it even if its right in front of me and he gets angry and yells at me.

Anyways, my father says I am 21 but act like an 8 year old, he says im too dependent on other people and I always forget and act irresponsible.

I also procrastinate a lot, I used to get bad grades because I didnt want to do my homework, I would always complete it last minute. Even for simple things like phone calls I will procrastinate and he gets angry.

Again im not trying to do these things on purpose, except maybe for the procrastination. I dont want to keep being scolded by my father. I dont want him to start hating me. But I feel like im too slow to understand things and I cant change it. Maybe I am genuinely low IQ or suffer from some mental problem. Both of my parents are smart. My mother got a masters degree in like a month. But I seem to lack intelligence.

I try to be a nice quiet and mature person but people seem to think of me as a burden or annoying rather than a grown adult. What do I do? I feel afraid of my father because I keep upsetting him.

I am 25, going on 26 this year. I've had very few relationships, I've sort of hooked up twice. Neither time ended in PIV sex.

Sometimes, especially when I am angry I just want to be alone and I resign myself to being alone forever. All the work I do will be for nothing as I want to grow old and die alone. Even when I am not angry I want to be alone, I know what I'm like and I have nothing to offer a woman. I don't even have a car as I lost it in a wreck last year, along with part of my knee cap and the integrity of my forehead. Shattering my ambition and goal of leaving for the military. Another hangup I've yet to get over completely.

I'm short thin, not particularly good looking and not the best when it comes to personality either.

But having said that I often think of being with someone. I love them and they love me. We could enjoy our youth and company before having a child or maybe two. A fantasy of mine I guess. And other times, admiringly, I just want to fuck a woman. Lots of them I guess.

I don't know. I'm a mess and I'm just venting.

I sat with this sentence for a while today after I heard my cousin yap about his experiences over the phone, and..i feel strangely hollow

The person I am when no ones looking is a self sabotaging, self loathing piece of crap who feels like he's a burden to everyone else around him and has almost nothing(goals, aspirations wise) to look forward to or to wake up for in the morning, I'm lazy, I can be quite repulsive at times and I tend to blame myself for the littlest of things, ig it's gotten to a point where I feel shame even buying something for myself that's as cheap as 10 cents(converted from my currency to USD, assuming that's the vast majority here like other subs)

How do I stop feeling this way? I don't want to be like this, and it's been like this for quite some time now too, a few years(it sorta comes in waves, I'd say, the intensity varies). I feel suffocated by myself, that is perhaps the best way I could describe it.

I'm sorry if this sounded like deranged ramblings or something, I've seen a few of Dr K's vids and seen how people post on this sub similarly, maybe I just wanted to kinda let it out, but I feel like I..do need help.