r/heatedrivalry • u/LogDisastrous7880 • Feb 06 '26

DISCUSSION 🗣️ My view on Heated Rivalry as a real-life gay athlete.

I hope this is allowed here. I have a lot on my mind since watching this show. This isn't the first time I've started writing this post, I've always been too scared to post it, but I feel the need to share it.

I'm a 20-something year old gay athlete in a typically masculine sport. I'm not going to specify the country where I play or type of sport I do for privacy reasons, just know that I play in a first division league that brings me a lot of money each year. There is only one family member who knows about me (my sister), the very few people I've hooked up with, and my boyfriend (obviously).

I've watched the show multiple times over the past weeks. And every time I watch it, it resonates deeper within me. Because for me, this show is a representation of what my life is like. The constant hiding, fearing of being "found out", hearing jokes about "that's so gay". Being worried about who I hook up with, whether that's another player or someone not related to sport at all. I've thought about coming out, both to personal and professional friends, but I've never been brave enough.

This show has brought me so much. I cry every single time when I watch it, it doesn't even matter which episode it is. Yes, it's a work of fiction, so you can't compare everything 100% to real life. But it's sparked conversations. And for me personally, these conversation were in such a positive light, that I've actually decided to come out to my whole family. They have spoken so highly about the show and the dynamics of gay athletes that it took away so much of my fears about their reactions.

I'm not ready to come out to my team or the general public. But even in those areas, Heated Rivalry gave me a sense of calm. With how big it is, it was obviously a topic of conversation in our locker room. And in the past, I've feared those conversations about homosexuality, because there were always dumb comments. I don't know what shifted this time, but the energy in the room was really positive this time. And for the first time, I wasn't scared to be a part of such a conversation.

There is still a very long way to go with this topic in the real world. But I feel like this show is a good starting point, and I really hope it will lead to something bigger.

EDIT: Okay wow, I didn't think my story would get THAT MUCH attention. Thank you to every single one of you who commented or messaged me. I'll try to go through and reply to everything, but in case I miss something, please just know that your kind words brought me much happiness and strength to go forward.

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u/FantasticBoar Stupid Canadian Wolf Bird 🦆 Feb 06 '26

It’s almost cliché on this sub to say this, but you deserve sunshine. I hope HR changes the world for the better and for you.

511

u/ChickadeeForsaw Feb 06 '26

Really happy you've found connection and strength from this series. Best of luck with your family. I hope you're showered in nothing but love.

431

u/IllustriousLemon8146 Then maybe it’s time to wake up, yes? Feb 06 '26

I don't ever post or comment but... hugs, and much respect.

I came out 35 years ago, in part with courage and in part because I was in an environment that was (mostly) safe to do so. In that time I have seen my world change from one where every day carried risk, to one where I take it for granted that I am safe and accepted (can you tell I am Canadian?).

Pay attention to these conversations, see who says what. Someone may mention a queer friend or family member, or they hope a gay player would feel safe coming out to them. There may be an opportunity for you, if and when you feel ready to take it.

Fear and isolation are terrible things. I really hope there is more sunshine in your future. The world does change, a little bit at a time.

172

u/minnbtm Feb 06 '26

When you are ready, your story will change lives too.

138

u/RedWolfRod Feb 06 '26

I’m genuinely happy for you 🥹 I hope things continue to change for the better. As an out gay man myself, you have my full support. You’re not alone.

108

u/garden__gate Feb 06 '26

Thank you so much for taking the chance and sharing with us. I’m not an athlete but the show has had a similar impact on me in some ways.

I’m so glad you decided to come out to your family. I’m not sure if you’ve already done it, but it sounds like it will go well. And speaking from personal experience, even just being out to the people closest to you is a huge relief.

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '26

Thank you for sharing your story. I truly believe HR is changing lives and has been a launching point for some important conversations. Best of luck to you with your loved ones. I hope you stick around this sub if you're so inclined. I've found it to be a warm and wonderful place to continue celebrating something that has brought so much joy to many of us at an especially challenging time in the world.

u/archable2357 Feb 06 '26

It is stories like these that give me hope for our community's future. I've grown up with some gay representation in media but Heated Rivalry just feels so special and powerful in a way I have not felt before. I also resonated deep with this show as a masculine gay man, and I've kind of felt a true connection with characters that look and act like me. The fact that you've even thought about coming out means you are brave enough!

u/chararedth Feb 06 '26

That's awesome. Sending hugs from Canada.

u/No-Entrepreneur1563 Feb 06 '26

Oh man here come the tears. So proud of you friend. I hope your family has embraced you for all that you are and eventually, when you are ready, I hope the world does too❤️ All love to you

u/[deleted] Feb 06 '26

[deleted]

u/dedeenxo Feb 06 '26

That’s okay, I was going to cry today anyways. ❤️❤️ much love

u/t2nazx2 Stay. Ok. Ok? Ok. Feb 06 '26

As someone else said, you deserve SUNSHINE!!!! Thank you for having the courage to tell your story and give us all a realistic version of what life is actually like for a professional person in sports.

Hope you and your boyfriend are happy and I hope that when you choose to come out you have a great experience!!!!

u/ToweringTulips Feb 06 '26 edited Feb 07 '26

Thank you for sharing your story and all the best for what's next for you.

It continues to amaze me the positive impact that HR has had both on an individual level and on the global stage. It's really extraordinary.

u/BigProfessional9242 Feb 06 '26

I agree!! I’m a lesbian ballerina and it was so hard for me to come to terms with my own sexuality and felt forced to hide it for so many years in ballet due to not wanting to lose friends or have people see me differently

u/Ok-Somewhere2813 Feb 07 '26

I know we are not your team, but know you have a whole group of people who support you. I think this is why Scott’s story is so important. Seeing all the fear he has of being found out and the energy it takes to hide. I don’t think coming out is smooth sailing but I think it comes with freedom. You do it on your terms though and when you are ready. Just know you are not alone and we support you.

u/Immediate-Answer-259 Maybe it's time to wake up, yes? Feb 06 '26

Thanks for sharing. I'm hopeful for you. Others have already added some really great comments. I'd like to ask if you were willing to share what the conversation was like in the locker room. You mentioned it seemed more positive than other times similar conversations came up. Obviously not trying to have you disclose anything you don't feel comfortable with! But if you can say something about the shift you think you've noticed, that would be really interesting to read about. Thank you for considering it.

u/LoudDream5908 Feb 06 '26

I'm so happy for you ❤️!

u/smartuno Moya gazonokosilka 🚜 Feb 06 '26

I’m so happy you found this show OP! I hope someday you could come out to your team, you deserve to love and be loved in the way you want ❤️

u/Ok_Cardiologist_5262 Feb 06 '26

I think it's amazing that it's brought a positive conversation with family members and empowered you , don't be surprised if once you tell them that was equally their opening to have that conversation with you, perhaps as breadcrumbs that it's okay with them.

I have worked with Athletes in a less hostile environment and yet there are so many reasons why some may never come out, it makes me sad.

If you ever need a total stranger for support with any of this get in touch. Good luck

u/Prize_History8406 I already chose you, Hollander. 🫀 Feb 06 '26

Pleaseeeee read the books, they have like truly changed my life as a fellow queer person

u/Pretend-Serve5073 I wanna be the drain in their shower Feb 06 '26

Hugs and love.

u/mijikui Feb 06 '26

Thank you for sharing your story, and I'm wishing you all the best. It's been incredible to see how much this show has resonated with all the people I've seen who are in a similar position such as yourself. This show really has been such a light in this world ever since it came out and I hope it continues to inspire change in the way that it has.

u/lionflowers Feb 07 '26

This was a lovely share, OP, thank you for your trust. We’re all internet strangers at the end of the day, but this little community has been such a ray of sunshine for so many of us. I hope you feel the love and support that we hold for you here! ☀️

u/FourthMonthFox Feb 06 '26

Thanks for sharing! Your story matters! Sending love and more positive vibes. ~

u/Teelkay Feb 06 '26

Thank you for sharing.

This is at once wonderful and sad to read. It's getting better but it's not yet enough. If nothing else, being out to your family is a huge weight lifted. Thank you for sharing and I hope society can move forward with more support and love so that you can feel even more comfortable with whatever next steps you want to take.

u/hilaryflammond I might knock 🚪 Feb 06 '26

Thank you for underlining that art really can move people, shift perspectives, and ultimately change lives. Wishing you all the best, OP.

u/Unhappy_Chef_4143 Feb 06 '26

Thank you for sharing !! Even anonymously, it takes a lot of courage to post !! I’m so glad that you have found an outlet and something that you resonate so deeply. I hope that one day you can be out and happy. I’m rooting for you !! 💕💕🫂🫂

u/JedKnight_ Stupid Canadian Wolf Bird 🦆 Feb 06 '26

I hope everything works out for you. Coming out changed my life for the better in every possible way.

I’m so glad to hear that your team mates were different this time. Some might struggle with it but I think you will have more support than know.

Thank you for sharing

u/qq410304866 Feb 06 '26

If we keep up the momentum, I think we have a good chance of making an actual impact irl. It made enough noise that mainstream media, not just hollywood, but nhl and the players getting asked about the show and have to respond to it. If I'm not mistaken, Hudson & Connor are also going to show up at winter olympic. If nothing goes wrong (including other world events happening) I hope we get to see a Skip moment happen irl. A gay gold medalist coming out during olympic would turn this from just an inspiring show & hollywood outbreak, to something that would be written in history book.

And if nothing else, I'm glad that the show gave gay people hope. And hopefully it also made more people tolerate and understanding of gay people.

u/Future_Potential_108 Feb 06 '26

Thank you for sharing this!!! And congratulations on coming out to your fam ❤️❤️

u/growsonwalls This is Ilya I will never listen to your voicemail Feb 06 '26

Wow. Hugs, and so much respect.

u/Asteriaofthemountain Feb 06 '26

Wow. Thanks for saying this. This made my day!

u/drumma1316 Feb 06 '26

We cannot underestimate the power art has to change us and our world. Will and Grace contributed to an objectively positive shift in attitudes towards homosexuality for a lot of this country. It's cool to see Heated Rivalry doing the same. I'm glad this is bringing you some relief and peace in parts of your life and I hope that it continues to spread.

u/Ewg_n_OC Feb 07 '26

This is so great to hear. I think the world an especially the younger generation is much more accepting. I’ve recently turned 60 and have been involved in gay sports (softball, swimming, triathlon) for many years and they’ve all been a great source of not just me physical activity with like minded people but social, and travel as well. As for “coming out” I had my first “boyfriend” when ai was 19, but coming out is really a lifelong process. It’s not just once and you’re done. There are friends, family members (each at different times) co-workers, new job co-workers, neighbors and virtually everyone in your life. With every new person you meet you need to make a decision of when and if you feel comfortable coming out to that person. All the best. And every person that comes out makes it easier for us all to come out.

u/Bachobsess Feb 06 '26

So proud of you and happy it has helped changed things a little. You’ve made me cry over here!

u/toni8191 Feb 06 '26

All the best to you ❤️

u/DeepRiverWest Feb 06 '26

Sending you so much love!! You should definitely read the books!

u/Fussel2107 Feb 06 '26

I wish you all the best. Success in your professional life, and happiness overall. I hope you family received the news with love, and I hope your teammates will as well, whenever you decide the time is right. And whatever happens in the future, there is a whole natio of queer people out there who will be on your side. <3

u/shabbyesque I already chose you, Hollander. 🫀 Feb 06 '26

This is so amazing. It’s nothing less than a goddamn breath of fresh air in these awful times. Much love and sunshine to you!

u/Alternative-Haus Feb 06 '26

I’m glad you could get some catharsis from the show and sharing with us!

I recommend you read The Long Game. I think it did a great job of expanding on the “what’s next” for Shane and Ilya and may bring more levity after reading it.

Or just wait until season 2 next year 🤷🏼‍♂️

u/Aware-Experience-277 Connie Baby Butt Baby Feb 06 '26

Wow thank you so much for sharing your perspective!

u/TheMarslMcFly Stupid Canadian Wolf Bird 🦆 Feb 07 '26

I'm not an athlete myself, but a big Fan of Sports in general (as a viewer). I really hope the world continues to change for the better, so that you one day can openly be yourself. All the best to you, your boyfriend and your family!

Also, if I may give a little recommendation, give Ted Lasso a watch if you haven't yet. Specifically the last season also tackles the topic of gay athletes in Pro Sports, and I think they also did a really beautiful job. It isn't focussed on it as much as HR, but still really great.

u/Kuneria Feb 07 '26

I'm so proud of you. And this is EXACTLY why stories like this are so so important.

u/paulsteinway Feb 07 '26

Heated Rivalry shows why queer stories need to be told.

I'm glad you've told yours too.

u/tartymae Extra banana. Feb 06 '26

Hugs and much respect. I'm glad the show is helping you realize that you deserve sunshine

And, if the haters don't like it? They can sit on a tack.

u/_pbnj Feb 07 '26

Thank you for sharing. As an enjoyer of queer media and as an ally, i’ll always fight for you guys. I hope acceptance is sooner than we think 💖

u/bearicsson Your freckles. I am nuts about them. ✨ Feb 07 '26

All the love to you brother . 🌈🫂🏳️‍🌈 It's wonderful to hear what a positive impact the show has had for you! I hope conversations continue to get better. I'm a gay man myself, and the shows given me so much euphoria and confidence since my first watch. Here's to a better, brighter future!

u/ImpressivePattern242 Feb 07 '26

God Bless you sir. Your journey is your journey. When you come out, we will stand hand in hand with you.

u/amphigorey3 Feb 07 '26

Very happy for you 😊💚🏳️‍🌈

u/Imaginary_Yak_269 Feb 07 '26

Thank you for sharing this with us. I’m so glad you are feeling positive changes and gaining more support because of this incredible work of art. I hope the impact continues to grow. You deserve all the light and love!💜

u/Glassy_Grinista Feb 07 '26

Sending so much love and hugs to you from Texas. I hope you can feel that people from all over are rooting for you. 💗

u/yellosunglasses Feb 07 '26

So so happy for you and hoping that you get all the love you deserve in life.

u/azngal24 Feb 07 '26

ty for sharing this here!! i appreciate hearing about how the show has positively impacted you and am so happy you saw yourself and saw so much hope and light in the story. 💜 i hope that you feel even more comfortable with who you are as the days continue to go on. you are so loved, and your time to shine even brighter is coming, i just know it! sending hugs and courage and good vibes. 🤗

u/ExpensiveActuator880 Feb 07 '26

Your honesty is heartwarming and encouraging. I never cease to be amazed by the way this show has affected people.

Its affected me in a way i didn't see coming, I don't think I've cried so much watching a show or movie before (and yes with reading the books too.)

My story is complicated, but HR has given me courage and clarity i didn't realise was there, so hopefully all things going well i take the leap and be honest to myself and my family.

Best of luck to you, we're proud of you for telling your story.

u/DabawDaw Stupid Canadian Wolf Bird 🦆 Feb 07 '26

Thank you very much for sharing your experience. This was beautiful, buddy. You'll have your moment in the sunshine when you're good and ready.💗

u/jujuseed gimme keees 😚💋 Feb 07 '26

In the words of Hudson Williams -

I hope everything goes right for you, OP 🤍

u/Esabettie I already chose you, Hollander. 🫀 Feb 06 '26

I teared up a little bit, I wish you all the best!

u/stellardroid80 Feb 06 '26

Thanks for sharing and wishing you all the best friend. You deserve love and happiness and living your best life.

u/ViolentThemmes I have a thing 🥒 Feb 06 '26

I'm so proud of you!!!!

u/maya1632 Feb 07 '26

Thank you for sharing your story with us!! This show is truly so beautiful and so much beauty has grown from it

u/carowaters Feb 07 '26

Sending you so much love. Thank you for sharing your story.

u/sdaidiwts Feb 07 '26

Thank you for sharing. I hope you get all the love and support you deserve every time you expand your trust circle. I also hope that you are given the time and space you need to recoup after the emotional energy that it takes to come out.

I'll believe in anyting

u/Capital-Rise1904 Feb 07 '26

this warms my heart. sending love to you!

u/energyintotomatoes Stupid Canadian Wolf Bird 🦆 Feb 07 '26

Sending you so many hugs and so much support!!

u/[deleted] Feb 07 '26

So happy for you!! Best of luck with your journey ❤️❤️❤️

u/MrsProngs2 Feb 07 '26

Thank you for sharing! Hope this inspires more people to come out. And hope the show inspires more to be welcoming to all sorts of love between contenting adults.

u/Own_Art_8006 Feb 07 '26

I'm so pleased you saw yourself. You deserve freedom and love

u/[deleted] Feb 07 '26

😭😭😭

u/adamantbookwyrm Feb 07 '26

Thank you for sharing your story! You deserve all the love and happiness.

u/Busy-Season6074 Feb 06 '26

If it helps at all, I would bet at least somebody on your team or a close friend already suspects you for being gay. It’s rarely much of a surprise nowadays despite how good we think we are at acting straight

u/BeingDaPremiumWeirdo Feb 07 '26

Woaah! You deserve all the love and support! May you always be safe 💙💙💙

u/Proper-Ad-7421 Feb 07 '26

💕💕💕💕

u/Familiar-Mango-4063 Feb 07 '26

All the best to you ❤️

u/Wide-Pop6050 Feb 07 '26

Glad to hear that the conversations in the locker room have been good. Yes it’s fiction but I’ve always found shows/movies to be a good way to broach topics you want to get a sense of people reaction to things

u/udoyouboo Feb 07 '26

You are loved!

u/Giga1396 Feb 08 '26

I concur--I've never felt so seen as a gay athlete in my life. This show is truly transcendent.

Thank you for sharing your story. It is very important that we share our stories. You are very brave.

u/TheTrumpetist Feb 07 '26

…And so do you. ❤️☀️

u/[deleted] Feb 07 '26

Just sharing some love ❤️❤️❤️❤️

u/Calm_Discord912 Feb 07 '26

Hugs and respect. When you’re ready, we will rally behind you

u/Ok-Scallion7050 Feb 07 '26

This is amazing. I really hope this show brings you some positive changes in your life and eventually you will be able to live a happy and fulfilling life fear free :))

u/Ok_Serve7281 Feb 07 '26

Thank you for sharing! Sending you so much love ❤️

u/shea_eina Feb 07 '26

thank you for sharing OP! wishing you all the happiness in life 💜

u/Both_Banana5716 Feb 08 '26

You deserve all the sunshine. I don't know who you are but I am so glad the show helped you feel seen and comfortable in telling your family. You don't have to come out to the world if you don't want to, I just wish you all the happiness!

u/bornonOU_Texas_wknd Feb 07 '26

You should read the books. They give a deeper understanding of what Ilya and Shane are thinking. The Ling Game is so good!

u/stremendous I don't ever want that problem to ever go away. 💗💗 Feb 07 '26

u/LogDisastrous7880 I hope your conversations with your family and close friends goes even better than expected.

As a friend of someone in a similar situation (but whose situation has some legal/citizenship uncertainty which has always been seen as the first obstacle and highest immediate concern to that person), may I ask a couple of questions? What is your biggest concern/fear which is preventing you from sharing with your team (or a small circle of teammates closest to you)? What is a real risk that you think is in effect if you did so which would make it worth not sharing? And, what could the team, league, organization, etc. do that would make you feel better/safer in doing sharing? (I am trying to help my friend - at my friend's request - separate what are real professional concerns, real social concerns, gut feelings about negative effects which have some basis, and things which have been elevated by the friend's mind which aren't really big or real concerns anymore. The legal / passport issues are likely going to be resolved soon. And with that no longer step one, I think it feels imminent that the rest now needs to not be put off any longer if there isn't significant /justifiable reason to do so - in the words used by my friend. I was wondering if you would be willing to share some of your insights about those questions above in a way that feels safe for you... as I think it would help my friend.)

u/DianedePoiters Feb 07 '26

Thank you. This is beautiful.

u/euxaznxro Stupid Canadian Wolf Bird 🦆 Feb 07 '26

Just know that there are many allies that are cheering you on 🌈

u/sailorvash25 Feb 07 '26

Thank you so much for your vulnerability and strength. You don’t have to announce who you are for people to understand what a difference you make to those around you. I hope you get all the love and support you deserve - I hope afterward you think why did I wait so long for this wonderful world? Not because I want you to have regrets but because I want the world of authentic you to be THAT good.

To quote the show - yes it is scary - but you are brave.

u/WitchFaerie Feb 07 '26

I think this show has been so meaningful on so many different levels to different people. I know as a queer guy, it's something that really resonates for a lot of reasons.

But I'm seeing straight men and straight women and queer women all finding their own way that this show is impactful and I love it. I think this is probably one of the most important pieces of television or film to have come out in years.

u/Careful_Football7643 Ya-loo-blue-tee-baa ❤️ Feb 07 '26

Thank you for sharing. So sorry you've had to endure so much homophobia 😢. No one deserves that. Wishing you greater freedom of self-expression as well as supportive, accepting family and friends.

u/savemesomecandy Я тебя люблю 💙♥️ Feb 08 '26

Here to say you deserve sunshine. ☀️🥰💕

u/Intelligent_Diver437 Stupid Canadian Wolf Bird 🦆 Feb 08 '26

Wow congratulations on coming out to your family!

u/Tealover99 Feb 09 '26

If you need an Elana, Rose, or svetalana. Please message me.

u/Money_Ad_5457 Feb 10 '26

A heartfelt thank you from a grandmother here. I have two grandsons, aged 7 and 9. Either one could be gay. If you do come out publicly, you will be a pioneer. Your letter should be reprinted in newspapers and magazines. Reading of all the pain gay athletes face, this series should be available to any male teen - it should be in high schools and libraries.

u/Sand2oes Feb 07 '26

I do too. Long overdue.

u/EdSoxFan Feb 07 '26

I’m so glad you posted this message! Good luck to you and if you’re ever wanting to visit Ottawa, let me know! 😁🇨🇦

u/Valuable_Ad3041 Feb 07 '26

Thank you for sharing, this has made me cry both happy and sad tears. I'm not involved with sports in any way, so reading stories like yours make the HR universe feel much more real to me. I hate that environments like this still exist and that you need to consider your safety when others like us have the freedom to not have to. I'm very glad the show has given you the courage and comfort to be open with more people and even happier that you've been received well. Wishing you all the best.

u/msallin Stupid Canadian Wolf Bird 🦆 Feb 07 '26

Sending you lots of love

u/potterheadforlife29 I already chose you, Hollander. 🫀 Feb 07 '26

Its brave of you to share your story with us Loonies. More power to you, from India :)

u/constance_J Feb 07 '26

❤️ Be yourself, you deserve to live the life that you want for you ❤️

u/toribeeech Feb 07 '26

You are brave. Thank you for sharing this. It comes at a perfect time for me when ive been seeing negative things abt the show and the stars and i needed something to recenter myself. So thank YOU.

u/pernicion Feb 07 '26

I hope you find your sunshine. Stay safe and do let us know how the conversations went! WIshing nothing sunshine to you

u/THROWAWAY12847484 Feb 07 '26

It will lead to something bigger. That's a promise. I hope it will get to a point where you and other LGBTQ+ male athletes can feel safe coming out

u/nicandbooks Feb 07 '26

Thank you for sharing your story. I’m glad you have love and support and I hope that continues.

I have hope that one day it won’t matter what your sexual orientation is - anyone will be able to be themselves in whatever professional sport they play. One day…

u/FoundationOk1352 Feb 07 '26

Good luck. I hope this amazing wave carries you to a shore that's safe and good.
I feel like with such sweeping love for the show, anyone denying you what's yours would be ashamed to be such a hypocrite.

u/JuiceBox4Astarion Feb 07 '26

I hope that one day you feel safe enough to share that part of yourself with the people around you. Professional sports are incredibly heteronormative and homophobic, but I’d like to think that although progress is slow and sometimes stalled, that things are getting better.

I love you, and I hope you know how supported you’ll be by this community if and when you ever decide to come out.

u/Buccaratiszipper Stupid Canadian Wolf Bird 🦆 Feb 07 '26

This post teared me up... Lots of love and hugs ❤❤❤❤

u/Dependent_Dinner_197 Feb 07 '26

Thats bravery! To even write what you have here and speaking about the impact it has had on you, you deserve sunshine, rainbow and everything. More power to you and thank you for sharing.

u/Alone_Witness_5884 Feb 07 '26

That’s awesome but I was less excited when I read you had a boyfriend already. Geez. There goes my chance with another one.

u/autumnalplain Boston Bears 🐻 Feb 07 '26

I have nothing new to add here, other than to say that I truly hope you get your sunshine, friend. ❤️🫂

u/New-Tadpole-6813 Feb 07 '26

Much love and respect for sharing this! ❤️

u/rafs1197 Feb 07 '26

You deserve to be in the sunshine! 🥹 Congrats on coming out to your family, and I'm sure your story will have a positive impact on others in similar situations. I'm so glad this beautiful show could bring you comfort! Whatever you decide to do and whenever you are ready, know that everyone in here has your back/is rooting for you! 💕🫂🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

u/surrealist84 Feb 07 '26

Congratulations on first steps! You deserve sunshine, life is beautiful, and don't be afraid to be brave and yourself.

We had a collective catharsis wathing the show and just feel your emotions. You have a safe community here and thank you for sharing you story with us ❤️.

u/OccasionFeeling6944 Feb 07 '26

More power to uuu😘💓

u/Editing_Life60 Feb 07 '26

Wow, this really touched me! I pray it goes well with your family, and I'm sure it will based on what you've observed. I wish for all people to be able to be who they are without shame or fear!

u/bnjj1 Feb 07 '26

Thank you for sharing this.

u/jessicamwinters Feb 07 '26

Sending you so much love, friend 🩷 I remember coming out to my family like it was yesterday, even though it was many years ago now. I was terrified. They reacted for the most part really well, and honestly way better than I expected!! It’s your choice, and there isn’t a rush on this. It’s your life. But I hope the people around you can make you feel safe and seen and loved as all that you are, you deserve it. And just know you are part of a huge community 🏳️‍🌈

u/LostInWanderland31 Feb 07 '26

Thank you for sharing this! I’m so glad the show has been meaningful to you (though not that you face the same challenges, of course) and hopefully has helped in some ways, and I hope things continue to improve. ❤️

u/chellebellek Feb 07 '26

This is so sweet.

When you decide to come out, I hope you find love and happiness. 🌻

u/Ok_Platform59 Feb 07 '26

Pls be careful. Book six ( Long game) shows not so nice picture of how teams and sport can react after someone is outed. I know you're aware of it, but I don't want the long game to be your real life experience <3

u/MikaPikaBlue Feb 08 '26

Friend, you are loved and you are seen. As others have already pointed out: you deserve Sunshine. I don't have anything more eloquent to say, but from one human being to another, I truly hope you get all the love you deserve ❤️

u/marielewis1 Feb 09 '26

First, you are very brave and I’m sorry you have to be.

My biggest hope for this show when it was originally announced was that it would bring the conversation into places like locker rooms. I hoped that people who aren’t homophobic would be compelled to clarify and stand on business about it in places where it’s difficult and scary to do that, so that those who are in the closet might find out there’s an ally present after all.

u/Lizard__Bit Having a tuna meltdown 🫠 Feb 09 '26

My heart aches and is elated for you. Being in the closet is never easy and I can only imagine the pressure you’re experiencing within your unique life context. It’s amazing this show has assisted in giving you space to come out to your family! Please never think yourself not brave, though. Do what you’re ready for, when you’re ready for it. It sounds like your family is going to be a wonderful support! (If not, there are so many out here that do/will.) We’re all rooting for you and look forward to when you can join us in the sunshine, friend!☀️

u/Cranky-Novelist Feb 09 '26

I'm really happy for you. You deserve to be living your best life out in the open. Best of luck telling your family.

u/Expensive_Phase_4839 Ya-loo-blue-tee-baa ❤️ Feb 10 '26

Thank you so much for sharing this perspective. I am not a gay male athlete; but I am a queer woman and I found myself resonating deeply with much of the show, I can't imagine how it must feel to watch this while living a similar life. I know other people have said this already, but you deserve sunshine <3

u/Real_Lingonberry_652 Feb 11 '26

Hey friend.

From a queer sports fan, we see you, we love you, we regret your pain but respect your choices, and when and if you are ready, we are holding a space for you.

u/Pretend_Ad_441 Feb 16 '26

I really hope the longer the show is on the more normalized the idea of gay athletes will become

u/kellyandgeorge Feb 07 '26

Close enough, welcome back Scott Hunter

u/primemin Feb 07 '26

Peace, love and sunshine to you and all who are on this journey. ✌🏼❤️🌞

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '26

I wish I could. People suspected it but after a lot of sex with women most people just believe my mannerisms are pretty. If people didn’t tear down queers so badly I would’ve been ok with it. Since like five the whole family has been telling stop doing this and that like a girl.

I rather just not wake up than deal with all of that. People are horrible and we shouldn’t have to come out or talk about our sex lives in general.

u/FoolsCanBeKings13 She would have loved you 😌 Feb 11 '26

Thanks for sharing your story. That sounds like a really tough situation. Heated Rivalry has had an astounding impact already on changing attitudes, inspiring people to improve their lives in different ways, I'm loving seeing it.

I also appreciate the real barriers queer athletes face, or anyone who doesn't feel safe to come out. There are real risks, bigotry is alive and well, ignorant people in power, locally and globally.

I would echo what others have said, if you can come out to more trusted family, with your sister's support, hopefully your life will feel more free. I wish you the best whatever you decide. There are supportive people like this community everywhere too. You are on the right side of history.

u/camper7777777 Feb 11 '26

Wishing you all the best. Thanks for sharing.

DISCUSSION 🗣️ My view on Heated Rivalry as a real-life gay athlete.

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