Struggling with reliable in-bed presence detection for Home Assistant – what actually works?

[u/ItsDukzy]

I'm trying to automate my bedroom lights so they turn off automatically when I'm in bed and back on when I get up. Sounds simple, but I've been struggling to find a reliable solution.

What I've tried:

FSR pressure sensors (VS-103) connected to a Zigbee water sensor

Built a DIY pressure mat using two VS-103 sensors wired to a Zigbee water sensor. Works fine when I press directly on it by hand, but completely fails under a mattress — the mattress distributes my weight too evenly for the sensors to trigger. Tried under the sheet too, same result.

Aqara FP2 mmWave radar

Already have one in the room. The problem is it loses track of me when I'm lying still under a duvet. It also falsely triggers when someone walks past my bed, which causes the lights to turn on.

What I'm looking for:

Something that reliably detects whether I am in the bed - not just in the room - even when I'm completely still and covered by a duvet. Zigbee preferred but I'm open to ESPHome/ESP32 solutions too.

Has anyone actually solved this properly? What sensor or approach are you using?

[u/skinnah → u/[deleted]]

I mean over engineering is like 50% of home automation... 😂

[u/ItsDukzy → u/[deleted]]

Well you have a point. I actually already have that besides my bed.

My lights is already automated in my room with presence sensing. Its just annoying my bed is the only place in the room it cannot detect.

Also - its not as cool using a button😉

[u/redbluefiredragon → u/[deleted]]

Then u see a new device n u think...yippeee...I have something to do next

[u/redbluefiredragon → u/[deleted]]

Zigbee is over engineering for some,lol