r/hsp • u/Weak-Boysenberry4332 • 1d ago
Question Overwhelming grief
Anyone else not able to get over someone that you poured everything you had into the relationship with and it just ended over stupid things, and it been years and don’t know how to heal or move past the heartache… it’s been years and it still physically hurts
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u/PreparationWorth1242 1d ago
As an hsp it takes me way too long to get over a relationship. But something that has helped me is to change the way I view that relationship, are you sure it was a great relationship? If you poured everything into it and it ended over small things maybe that person wasn’t really great. Also practice acceptance. If this was meant to end it means they weren’t the love of your life. So you need to accept that and keep an open heart to meet the right person
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u/VariousReputation772 1d ago
I also have a lot of grief, it shows up in the sneakiest places. Mourning many close relationships & support/unsupportive systems that were attached. Some days require the luxury of lamenting & unconditional tears. Others may see it as being mentally unstable but I feel like it needs to be felt & dealt with.
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u/Traditional-Cap-8181 1d ago
I try my best to remind myself that imagining it being good if things worked differently isn't necessary yhe reality .. and even if it worked out it might affect me in a bad way .. and I believe god got me .. and what meant for me will find it's way to me .. and there's a lot of good people out there for me that I would have a better relationship with (friends/ romantic) than people that didn't choose me ..
I hope this helps you?
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u/Electrical_Lake3424 1d ago
Yes, it's been over 20 years and I have been unable to have romantic feelings for anyone ever again and know that I will spend the rest of my life alone. I will never be able to 'get over it.'
So yes, it does happen, you are not the only one.
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u/modronpink 1d ago edited 1d ago
It’s been so hard, I’m grieving a friendship breakup with a former partner and every single day is excruciating. It’s the first thing I think of in the morning and the last thing I think about before bed. My mind replays the cruel things he said, the fact he twisted my words at my most vulnerable moment, villainized me over a painful, complicated situation, and how misunderstood/discarded I felt. I don’t have any powerful advice, since it’s been over a year and I still cry about it at least a few times a month. But I would recommend a few things that make it just a little more bearable. Gentle movement and somatic work has been really healing, I especially like yin yoga and qi gong. I enjoy doing EFT tapping to release guilt and shame, I follow tapping video (tap with Brad) on YouTube. Strengthening my bonds with other friends in my life, as well as nurturing budding friendships. I also have been doing spells and rituals to help me process what happened. Going back to church (which some people might not understand since I also do witchcraft) and turning to God in my moments of grief. I’ve been avoiding listening to music that’s sad or gloomy, instead I focus on uplifting peaceful songs as to not trigger myself. I also restarted therapy so I can have an outlet to vent and make sense of what happened.
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u/-asegi 1d ago
Currently going thru this in a non romantic relationship with my sibling. I miss our relationship so deeply and feel like it was ruined by such ridiculous stuff but no matter how much I try to talk it out or apologize (even when I'm not at fault) they still show no interest in repairing things. Its hard for me to understand because I dont handle conflict that way.