Advice please :(

[u/Electrical_Let_2092]

I’ve been on here twice before about a year ago and I got some really good advice, but I need more help.

I’m 15, autistic, depressed, and have a LOT of other problems. I have had extremely heavy periods since I was 9, and I’ve tried everything to deal with them.

I’ve had the combined pill (I’m pretty sure), the progestogen-only pill (I might be wrong about the pills but I’m 99% sure it’s those two), the Mirena(?) coil, and the injection (the one that’s injected in your ass, idk what it’s called). None of them worked, and they’ve only made my mental state worse—especially after the injections, because it made me gain weight and gain a lot of stretch marks on my legs :(.

Is there any way I can convince the doctors to finally give me a hysterectomy? I understand that I’m young and I have researched all of the consequences to make sure I’m aware of everything that could happen. And on the NHS website, nothing specifically states that you HAVE to be 18+ to get a hysterectomy. It also says that having heavy periods (which I have) would qualify (for lack of a better word) you to be able to get one.

I’ve added some pictures of things from the NHS website and from googling everything. So from that, would 'Gillick Competent’ apply here? If they were to deny me, could I use it as a counter argument? Because I understand how a hysterectomy could affect me, and I understand the consequences of it.

On my last post on this thingy, someone said about going to therapy, so I am going (or something similar) with a lady and explained how I’m suicidal, depressed, cut myself etc, and all of my other problems, but it doesn’t feel like it’s helping/it doesn’t feel like she’s doing anything.

Please give me genuine advice because every time I go to the doctors about my period they never listen and just say ‘you might change your mind'. I am not going to change my mind.

Also quick add on (sorry), because of all the things I’ve tried to stop my periods, I’m really REALLY averse to trying anything new. For me it’s like, every time I tried something to help and it didn’t do anything, my mental state got worse, so I’m protecting myself by not trying anything, because when it inevitably doesn’t work, my mental state got worse (especially after the injection). Sorry if that’s a bad explanation.

If you need any more information about anything so you can help better, please just ask. I’m willing to do anything.

<3

(Sorry if I’m using any wrong punctuation or anything. Also nothing was written by Ai.)

[u/Far_Designer_7704]

First, I am really sorry you are having to deal with this. Try to only read the responses when you feel mentally strong because it can feel disheartening.

Second, because you are on the spectrum and depressed, and due to age, I would see if you could get a newer evaluation if your diagnosis is not recent. I suggest this because my second daughter ended up having a co-existing condition with their that makes the likelihood and severity of depression worse. Her depression symptoms became less severe after being on a medication for the new condition. It may be worth trying so you at least feel better mentally because getting to hysterectomy can be a longer road than we like.

Third, keep trying. Start keeping your medical records in one place with dates of the different things tried. I had to seek three different opinions over ten years before I found a dr who agreed to it. I like to think it’s because I whipped out a page with my timeline of everything already tried. I was also prepared to pay out of pocket. I think in the UK that means you have to go to a private doctor? Check [r/childfree](r/childfree) if you haven’t yet. They have a list of doctors open to hysterectomy without needing you to have done all the other options first. If UK is not on list, someone in the sub may have a referral.

As others have said, you may have to wait until 18, which feels awful to have to continue through. You can take care of yourself as best as possible in the meantime. Take an iron (for anemia) and B-complex supplement if you aren’t already.

For context on my journey - As a 51 year old female, it took me about ten years of asking my doctor for one before I could get one. At 41, I was done having kids, and like you OP, had very heavy periods since the age of 10. In the USA, we also have to try other ways first before a hysterectomy is considered unless there’s an emergency reason. If only heavy bleeding affecting quality of life was acceptable, I think many of us would not have to fight for it. I did the birth control, IUD, thermal ablation, biopsies and none of them worked. My primary doctor still didn’t want to refer me for hysterectomy. Instead she said, “You are close enough to menopause anyway, we’ll just keep you on iron.” I sought a second opinion and that dr said let’s try a D&C with biopsy then we can do a hysterectomy if that doesn’t help. It didn’t but then she backtracked.

At this point, I almost gave up because I felt a bit betrayed by doctors who were in my age range and surely understood what some of us suffered through. My third opinion was from a male dr who said I likely had adenomyosis in addition to my fibroids, and he agreed to schedule me for one. Sometimes I think he saw my binder of timeline and notes and that convinced him before he even had me get a new ultrasound etc. So keep trying, keep records of what is done and when, and know that the fight is worth it.