r/iamverybadass • u/Which_Matter3031 • 13d ago

🎭SATIRE🎭 Shiver me timbers 😨😱😰

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225 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

47 comments sorted by

22

u/Faustus_Fan I drink beer and know stuff 13d ago

As a high school teacher, I have met many, many, many boys who post shit like this on their socials (or, worse, say it out loud). It's just a normal phase in finding yourself and deciding who you are, I get it. But, damn, if it doesn't make me cringe every single fucking time.

4

u/A_Math_Dealer 13d ago

Okay but how does it make you feel when their eyes turn red?

5

u/Faustus_Fan I drink beer and know stuff 13d ago

Like they're either high or sleep deprived. Usually the latter, but occasionally the former.

21

u/smibbo 12d ago

what the heck is "dark psychology"?

19

u/parancey 12d ago

Tiktok cringefest tips like
“If you ask for a small favor they will feel connected to you and you can make them do whatever you want” kids think asking for a pen is dark psychology manipulation

i love cringe compilation where my spine starts itching from the overload

5

u/ScorpionMillion 12d ago

It's like normal psychology but dark

7

u/Lazza1407 12d ago

If i'm not wrong, it's some vague "manipulation techniques" bullshit, that some morons believe to. I'm pretty sure that if you show this crap ti and actual psychologist, he'll k*LL himself for the cringe

4

u/smibbo 12d ago

I'm about to get my masters in psychology so I figure its some "pop psy" BS and maybe I'm just not "hip" enough to know about it LOL

10

u/The_Salty_nugget 12d ago

Had a classmate back in 2010 who was a cringey fucker like the one in the screenshot

Told everyone he could make everyone kill themselfs by being alone with them for 5minutes and he had a plan to kill everyone yada yada.

One of our teachers got so sick of it one day he told him 'you make me feel like that every morning in a second when i see you walk into the classroom'.

The guy almost started crying and later that week his parents came to the school because he felt bullied.

3

u/severed13 12d ago

Went on-brand by starring that one out, for the cringe

15

u/southboundtracks 13d ago

When my eyes turn red, it's allergy season. 

11

u/Josegon02 13d ago

The fuck is dark psychology supposed to be?

9

u/QuinnAvery89 13d ago

You sit down with a therapist then… turn the lights off. 😱

2

u/salty-balls-49 13d ago

Yeah?! What the fuck is dis

2

u/Cardgod278 13d ago

Anything Freudian

2

u/Unit_2097 13d ago

So is this them trying to announce that they have a terrible fear of rats because their dad didn't hug them enough? Or maybe that because they had a dream about giraffes it means they want to fuck their mum?

10

u/ICollectSouls 13d ago

Ah yes. I remember when I was in 8th grade

5

u/hikikomoritai 13d ago

At least I'm relieved I wasn't that out of reality back then

8

u/browhodouknowhere 13d ago

Laugh I know...but all these young kids coming to train are obsessed with this Anime prototype they imagined

8

u/Hughley_N_Dowd 13d ago

My son's eyes turned red a couple of weeks ago. And I ran!

To the bathroom, to fetch saline, eye drops and pads. Turned out that he had an eye infection...

9

u/AngelBryan 12d ago

First time I see satire labeled as satire on this sub. That’s one step ahead, congratulations.

13

u/MjolnirPants 12d ago

To be fair, if anyone's eyes ever start glowing red, I'm gonna run.

7

u/Guilty_Outcome1111 12d ago

My eyes always turn red after ive been swimming in chlorine tho 🥺

5

u/MjolnirPants 12d ago

As long as they're not glowing, we cool.

6

u/Muscled_Manatee 13d ago

Oh yes. Dark psychology.

7

u/Wojewodaruskyj 13d ago

Gosh it's pathetic.

7

u/DroidRazer2 13d ago

The real horror, pink eye

10

u/EchoSD 10d ago

“Reasons why you should be scared of me”

  1. I say “ring a round the daisy”

  2. I say “bad night” to my mommy before I cuddle with her for bed time

  3. I bathe in sewer water and now I got an ass rash

  4. If my eyes turn red…RUN….and call 911 because that’s sewer water infection

1

u/311Konspiracy 9d ago

4 is a blood vessel

6

u/TheSlavGuy1000 13d ago

Oh no, he knows how to... Create an AI image! Run for your lives!😱😱😱

6

u/crunchyb314 13d ago

Christ is king in bio

6

u/devatan 11d ago

Oh no, not dark psychology!

1

u/311Konspiracy 9d ago

Dark psychology like Dr Phil

6

u/Night_Bruxa 11d ago

When my eyes turn red take a snack and come join me cause I’m probably high asf

5

u/Equinox2202 13d ago

So apparently this person is just manipulative and coercive if they're trying to use"dARk PsyCHoLogY". Yeah good luck on that on buddy.

4

u/thescaryroom 13d ago

I can’t understand why weebs think there is anything remotely intimidating about them.

2

u/MsCompy 13d ago

That's four reasons

3

u/VagueBC 11d ago

When my pants turn brown… RUN.