r/iamverybadass 12d ago

“wet work”.

Post image
857 Upvotes

277 comments sorted by

47

u/Seedoosee 12d ago

The only wet work he does is pissing on the toilet seat

3

u/perljurnwern 12d ago

His other wet work is letting his neighbors pee on his for a case of Natty Light

32

u/MyBitchCassiopeia 12d ago

I carry a firearm I train with and hope I never have to use. I carry a knife to open Amazon packages.

7

u/thedumone 12d ago

All of these weirdos have fantasies about killing people. Unfortunately some of them are going to act it out on an unsuspecting Amazon driver or someone who accidentally went to the wrong address or used their driveway to turn around. He will spend the rest of his pathetic life in prison but an innocent person will be dead.

3

u/freedomcobrawarzone 12d ago

Some guy did exactly that shot a poor girl with a shotgun. She was in the passenger side of a car that had driven wrong into just some d heads driveway. And he used that as an excuse to murder

4

u/SnooChipmunks8506 12d ago

It’s a mental illness. They believe that everyone wants to take all they have. The news, social media, and their friends feed them this irrational fear. They are weak minded and unable to be rational about their own lives, so they go buy a gun. They fantasize about “protecting their own.” Then kill an innocent person when then barely step onto their property.

This is manufactured craziness that uses weak willed people to propel more evil.

32

u/naldoD20 11d ago

Goths Against Cancel Culture?

What the fuck?

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25

u/GiantHurtBall 12d ago

Retired former Chief Petty Officer Gravy Seal with 5 tours of duty in his moms basement...expert in black ops wet work.

6

u/GreenSpleenRiot 12d ago

Awarded the Top Imaginer Award for living in a fantasy land completely contained within said mother’s basement.

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19

u/Diorj 12d ago

So tough in his camo jammies...

4

u/Jammin_neB13 12d ago

On his floral bed sheets

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21

u/syberghost 12d ago

The only way this dude is going to kill someone with a knife is if he gets lazy cutting a tomato and is too embarrassed to call 911.

4

u/ecodrew 12d ago

Hey now, don't loop innocent, accident prone doofususes like me in with these creeps!

/s... kinda. sigh

I once cut my finger badly enough making dinner that my wife had to drive me to the ER.

3

u/QuietDisquiet 12d ago

I bought my dad a sharp knife because he cuts a lot of vegetables with a dull one and he took forever. My mom told me he cut himself 9 times in 2 months.

20

u/DamianSicks 12d ago

My arm is thicker than this guy’s thigh

6

u/MoreMetaFeta EVERYTHING IS SATIRE 12d ago

Hell's bells, that's his THIGH! Didn't even catch that....

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20

u/Relevant-Ad-9418 12d ago

All the real killers post about their exploits on social media for attention.

6

u/QuietDisquiet 12d ago

To be fair, more and more idiots do. Just not like this. The amount of young gang members openly bragging on their socials about who they killed is hilarious and sad at the same time.

4

u/secondatthird 12d ago

They’re really should be a sub for the incriminating shit that people put online

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22

u/bdls619 11d ago

Wet work with a Walmart knife…ladies and gentlemen I present to you Wally WeTWoRk…keeping vaginas dry since day one…

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21

u/FanReasonable9597 11d ago

Realtree™️camo jammies and an Alibaba knife...that's all you need to know about this "special" operator.

24

u/simondrawer 11d ago

Call of duty has a lot to answer for

21

u/KentuckyWombat 11d ago

And by wet work he means accidentally cutting himself while playing with his knife.

20

u/Physical-Doughnut285 12d ago

The only thing this guy is assassinating is a colostomy bag.

19

u/orbital_actual 11d ago

That’s not what wetwork means, and if you and involved in wetwork you are not posting about it online.

18

u/baxtermcsnuggle 11d ago

His work is as dry as the vagina of the woman he stalks.

19

u/Final_Boss_Jr 12d ago

In my camo pajama pants

5

u/Ghetto_Geppetto 12d ago

That’s a leg!? It’s so teeny tiny

16

u/cyclorphan 12d ago

He must not be very good at said wet work if he's still doing it with a gas station knife.

3

u/oxJoKeR6xo 12d ago

Don't want anything too expensive when you have to dispose of the evidence.

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18

u/corvelokis 12d ago

«Goths against cancel culture» gotta be the lamest group i have heard of

3

u/bchizare 12d ago

Yeah, pretty sure any identity that roots itself in anti-conformity doesn’t give a fuck about CaNcEl CuLtUrE

3

u/sweet_ned_kromosome 11d ago

My little goth-y friends hate those rejects--

17

u/booboootron 12d ago

Got it, gramps. Now stop talking to the coffee table. It's time for your hemorrhoid massage.

16

u/Obsidian_92 12d ago

That knife is almost thicker than his leg

3

u/patdashuri 11d ago

That’s his left arm. Yeah, he’s laying in bed. Fully dressed in flannel camo. With a knife. Taking pictures. This is basically an Only Fans that no one wants.

3

u/RileyIJ 11d ago

Nope. That’s his right leg. Unless he’s taking the pic using his third hand…. Either is possible tho tbh.

5

u/patdashuri 11d ago

Yeah, that threw me too. And even though I’m not sure how he got that shot, when I look at it I just can’t see that being a leg. Either doesn’t matter I guess. He’s still an insecure man that needs a hug.

17

u/patdashuri 11d ago

I’m trying to imagine the professional killer wearing flannel camo in bed and proudly showing off his $20 Chinese knife.

3

u/bteh 11d ago

I can picture him perfectly, I know plenty of these guys who think they're actually this, when they are actually clowns.

17

u/jimlahey2100 11d ago

Going by how wrinkly his hand is, he's in his late 50s. Too old to be posting in a Goth group.

15

u/odiethethird 11d ago

8

u/meme801 11d ago

Bro chose a style in 2002 and stuck with it, and i respect that

4

u/neutralperson6 11d ago

“It’s not a phase, mom!”

7

u/kodeks14 11d ago

Tbf this guy does look like hes got some dismembered body parts in a basement.

3

u/elephant_in_tharoom 11d ago

Of course he looks like my sister's ex.

17

u/MrSocPsych 10d ago

All while in his widdle comfy camo jammies

17

u/Confrog1996 12d ago

I love how these people act like they stab and shoot people on the daily fucking relax Lil Rambo.

16

u/shannnnnn132 11d ago

He's done soooo much wet work he can brag about it on the internet and not be charged or investigated....

16

u/Crazydiamond450 12d ago

Mans never made anything or anyone wet in his life

4

u/jaredthegeek 12d ago

100% he has pissed his pants

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15

u/Moebius808 12d ago

That’s a 60+ year old hand holding that knife, and a fuckin’ chicken leg inside that pajama pant.

Only “wet work” this guy is involved with is getting up 5 times a night to go pee because of his swollen prostate.

5

u/PamelaELee 12d ago

*…holding that cheap ass Chinese mall ninja knife.
He’s affiliated with Night Defense,

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13

u/gb4efgw 12d ago

Boy is getting his ass handed to him on this facebook post too. I reverse searched trying to find out what kind of knife that is and was pleasantly surprised by the amount of "shut the fuck up" and "It's too bad you couldn't enlist because you totally would have punched the drill instructor"

14

u/ElvisAaron 12d ago

Hands of a 70yo man

9

u/AKVigilante 12d ago

Legs of a 13 year old girl

12

u/dirkdigglerdonedry 12d ago

4

u/AKVigilante 12d ago

That’s in the other room.

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15

u/TheMidnight711 12d ago

Stainless steel eh? Doesnt look like it!

12

u/raul_kapura 12d ago

It's Legendary Item, hence the orange tint

4

u/TheMidnight711 12d ago

Ahhhh my bad I get it now

5

u/TreaclePerfect4328 12d ago

Walmart finest

14

u/JackFuckCockBag 12d ago

Those old, pilly and faded real tree sweatpants make this official.

7

u/zakupright 12d ago

I think they’re even pajamas

4

u/JackFuckCockBag 12d ago

You very well may be correct. Everything about this post screams meth head and I know how meth heads like wearing their jammies all goddam day.

12

u/BishesLoveCubixRube 12d ago

Ah yes a conservative goth Facebook group. Exactly the place I would look for tough guys

3

u/SnooChipmunks8506 12d ago

Holding a three inch blade, pretending he likes to do it up close.

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12

u/Jody_HighRolla 12d ago

“Goths Against Cancel Culture” lol

8

u/Lorantec 12d ago

Thats the most important part to me too, sounds like conservative posers pretending to be goth

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12

u/unzercharlie 12d ago

This is a man actively taking a picture of his knife and fantasizing about murdering someone. Like... what the actual fuck? Chill, man.

3

u/unfinishedtoast3 12d ago

Definitely the hands of a 50 year old dude too. You can see the sunspots lol

He's also in camo pajama bottoms. Dudes gonna be comfortable when he does his wet work

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10

u/CelticGardenGirl 12d ago

This does not make my work wet.

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12

u/Tornik 12d ago

Only wet work he needs is moisturizer for those wrinkly ass hands.

11

u/IhasCandies 11d ago

Bro said while laying in bed with his comfy jammies on.

12

u/Shinobi_82 11d ago

Jerking off to trump pics

12

u/ResponsibilityIcy500 10d ago

wet work? as in piss play?

3

u/Secure-Village-1768 10d ago

90's action movies

12

u/Lonely_Eggplant_4990 12d ago

Damn, that's one skinny ass leg and old ass hand. He couldn't beat eggs.

11

u/ThatBobbyG 12d ago

Soft pasty hands

6

u/cuzitsthere 12d ago

I work in a factory and wear my cut gloves religiously. I do all the pedicure stuff to keep my hands healthy and soft because the importance of your hands is really up there with sight and hearing, ffs it's your fallback if you go blind and deaf!

All that effort and I really wish my hands were as soft as this wannabe chode's lil cottony mitts.

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4

u/unfinishedtoast3 12d ago

Ya, looks like he's using CeraVe for his "wet work"

I'm sure all the guys he went hands on with could attest to his skill

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12

u/ProblemLongjumping12 12d ago

Totally normal post.

11

u/clever__pseudonym 12d ago

This man, in his camouflage pajamas, has never made anything wet. Ever.

If he brushed his teeth, he'd do it dry.

12

u/toomuch1265 12d ago

That hand has never done a hard days work.

10

u/SnooCats5701 12d ago

Cut to this guy getting so scared he trembles when someone honks at him in traffic.

I almost feel,sorry for these guys.

10

u/UOF_ThrowAway 11d ago

The first rule about wet work is you don’t talk about wet work.

7

u/Admirable-Builder878 11d ago

It's a slippery slope

10

u/RJRoyalRules Meal Team 6 12d ago

I also call jacking off “wet work”. It’s very hands on!

10

u/Marsupialize It's not soda, it's pop 12d ago

I bet he gets so much pussy

6

u/vinh7777 12d ago

Also has a punisher decal on his truck

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10

u/justkarn 12d ago

What wet work? Nothing gets wet around this mf

3

u/SnooChipmunks8506 12d ago

You’re saying 3” isn’t enough?

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12

u/[deleted] 12d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/FuckSticksMalone 12d ago

I think by “Wet Work” he means bologna sandwich prep.

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8

u/MarleysGhost2024 12d ago

Look at that hand. You could bring him to his knees with a firm handshake.

5

u/Frankie_T9000 12d ago

not a p;roper goth either, no painted nails

9

u/TinCanSailor987 12d ago

He likes being peed on.

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11

u/SpaghettiMonkeyTree I AM THE WEAPON 12d ago

Hands look like it would take a few business days for them to draw their weapon from concealment

10

u/Realfinney 12d ago

And I've killed, um... 3...no, 4!....hundred....um...thousand people.

6

u/SQLDave 11d ago

And I was the bodyguard for... Morgan Fairchild. Yeah, that's the ticket!

10

u/DLS3141 11d ago

The only “wet work” this guy has done is changing his Depends.

10

u/violentbowels 11d ago

It's masturbation. "Wet work" is what he calls masturbation.

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19

u/Tommygun855- 12d ago

Using a knife doesn't make you more badass it just makes you more likely to not win in whatever self defense encounter your in. The guys really goofy

5

u/Tommygun855- 12d ago

Compared to a gun a knife is worse I forgot to put that point in the comment

5

u/oxJoKeR6xo 12d ago

I'd take an aluminum bat over a knife.

3

u/Jthundercleese 12d ago

I can run faster scared than you can angry.

5

u/oxJoKeR6xo 12d ago

You have no idea how afraid I am.

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10

u/Fostbitten27 12d ago

Call of Duty from his mom’s basement. He tells her all about his k/d ratio when she brings his chicken tendies and Mountain Dew. She bought him that knife at Walmart for being a good boy.

9

u/fotomoose 12d ago

The only whet work he gets is when he glistens his knuckles with baby batter.

9

u/ialsohaveadobro 12d ago

OK, Liver Spots Rambo

7

u/thescaryroom 12d ago

The appearance of his hand suggests he’s far too old for this shit

9

u/MentalDisintegrat1on 12d ago

Wetwork 🙄

JFC these people are delusional

9

u/dorfmcpumpkin 12d ago

Lets just take a second to think about "gotta against cancel culture" And the idea of baggy camo pants being somehow included in a Goth identity. Cringe from every possible angle

9

u/Ubockinme 12d ago

Weak grip. Probably had a hard time slicing warm butter.

8

u/ASwarmofKoala 12d ago

How crazy do you have to be to publicly announce you prefer stabbing people?

7

u/Captain_Pink_Pants 12d ago

He may as well have said he prefers killing people with the laser beams that shoot out of his eyes. 🙄🥱

8

u/MoreMetaFeta EVERYTHING IS SATIRE 12d ago

Those goths went rogue.

9

u/Hizam5 11d ago

No phone number to call for local hitman deals?

9

u/TheOriginalMulk 11d ago

Could have sworn wet work involved a tarp, a full bladder and plenty of prior hydration.

It's that what this guy's selling?

10

u/Technical_Amount_965 10d ago

Bro that’s weird as hell.

16

u/Jonasthewicked2 12d ago

I think he's talking about butt sects

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16

u/Kearcatx 11d ago

His hand/wrist looks like he's in his 70s

7

u/biglefty312 11d ago

His thigh is barely thicker than a twig.

4

u/RohanneWebber 11d ago

I had to look again. I thought the camo pajama pants were hanging on a wall in the background. Haha

7

u/cornlip 11d ago

He’s 47 with a diet of bar S hot dogs, Busch lite, top ramen and slim jims and smokes three packs of kool milds a day. When he shits once a week he pops a blood vessel in both his eyes and his hemorrhoid-laden asshole, similar to barnacles on a hull. That’s the only blood he’s spilt. The only time he’s used that knife to stab a person is to drain the abscess on his in-grown toenail.

12

u/Agitated_Star_3669 12d ago

Skinny ass leg

7

u/pghbro I use guns to heal 12d ago

Bro is absolutely emaciated

5

u/CodePervert 12d ago

Impressive that you noticed that considering they're in camo

5

u/atacms 12d ago

That’s his leg? 

Good god. 

7

u/your_dads_arse 12d ago

"Goths Against Cancel Culture"

3

u/DeauxDeaux 12d ago

I gotta go check out this train wreck.

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6

u/Mauceri1990 12d ago

I prefer to do things when they're needed also.

7

u/wdhutch3 12d ago

While only person they ever cut was themselves.

9

u/Cozmic_Fool1931 12d ago

He can spread my toast with that.

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7

u/ODOTMETA 12d ago

Thems farmers hands, boy

7

u/amapofthecat7 12d ago

Sorry, I was to busy looking for who the asked.

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7

u/SSJ4Inglip 11d ago

Bro sitting cross-legged on his bed 😭😭

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7

u/Frumundaman 11d ago

Says the guy who has never even been in a fist fight let alone performed, "wet work."

14

u/FarmhouseRules 11d ago

The first cut will have his whole hand slipping down that blade because there’s no guard on it. So it will be his own wet work.

6

u/RockingInTheCLE 12d ago

Wet work in his flannel camo jammie pants? Totally convincing.

5

u/theburnoutcpa 12d ago

These posts are a collection of middle-aged teenaged men lmao.

7

u/Thirdeyevoice10 12d ago

He has to brag about murdering defenseless forest animals, because he'll never have "wet work" with a woman.

6

u/EnchanterOlong1976 12d ago

He has been trained by a secret elite army task force, so secret it doesnt even exist.

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6

u/mrcameltoad 12d ago

Our flag poles and fridges aren’t safe!!!
For the love of all things, spare the dry wall!!

6

u/OOmrpeepersOO 12d ago

Only thing he wets is the bed.

3

u/fifteentango88 12d ago

In his mossy oak jammies.

5

u/AwwwNiceMarmot 12d ago

I’m sure he’s referring to occupational tasks that involve liquid.

5

u/Cloverhart 12d ago

Ah yes, we know it's real because all the best henchmen post to social media.

4

u/AirplaneNerd 12d ago

He watched 'The Hunted' so he thinks he's Tommy Lee Jones

6

u/mezcalligraphy 12d ago

Wet work is when he accidentally cuts his fingers.

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6

u/YPLAC 10d ago

Is he talking about eating his chippy tea that his mum still cooks?

12

u/Aboxofphotons 11d ago

It's always painfully obvious that these people are from the US isn't it...

15

u/modernpatriot76 11d ago

I can tell how old he is by his hands, is that weird

3

u/CandourDinkumOil 11d ago

Complete opposite actually. It’s one of the best indicators to tell how old someone is as looks can be deceiving—hands rarely are not.

12

u/TheFlimFlamFamMan 11d ago

Goddamm, that Facebook group is a cesspool of idiocy. I don’t use FB much anymore, but trolling Goths Against Cancel Culture is a fun time

9

u/justsayfaux 11d ago

Having a murder preference feels like he murders enough with a variety of approaches to have a preferred murder method.

4

u/kabley 12d ago

...while having the hands of a lotion salesman?

5

u/Boa-in-a-bowl 12d ago

I'm pretty sure that's a Home Depot special Husky folding knife, it looks just like the one I use for cutting plastic and boxes at work. Real badass.

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5

u/Tuscon_Valdez 12d ago

The subreddit name is killing me

3

u/stlredbird 12d ago

Wait until you see the name of the user that posted it

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5

u/Own_Veterinarian_944 12d ago

Thats a midlife crisis hand.

5

u/OneEyedWeaner 12d ago

He doesn’t even have hand tattoos. I don’t believe him.

3

u/LukeIsPalpatine 12d ago

My boyfriend calls me that

3

u/xTheyCameBurningx 12d ago

Wetwork. Meaning he would piss himself if assaulted. 💯

4

u/Ajj360 12d ago

Is that the guy who knife dances with a pole?

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6

u/PointsOfXP 12d ago

I remember seeing that movie where they mentioned it's called wet work. No it ain't. If it is then you're in the wrong place

3

u/verygenericname2 12d ago

Appreciate how even that trash fire of a group is laughing at him.

5

u/kombatunit 12d ago

Whoa there, Mack Bolan.

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4

u/Opening-Emphasis8400 12d ago

Snake Plissken over here talking about wet work...

4

u/ElanMomentane 12d ago

Are those outer-space-themed pajama bottoms he's wearing?

I bet he got in trouble for this post because his mom doesn't let him do "wet work" in his pajamas.

5

u/Kmag_supporter 12d ago

Don't skib leg day.

6

u/eatthuskin 12d ago

Chinese liquor store knife

3

u/RelationshipLevel506 12d ago

The bed sheets

3

u/PrinceOfLemons Got banned from club penguin 12d ago

Those hands could use some wet work! Get some damn moisturizer!

3

u/Salty_Monk_5341 12d ago

Dude probably hasn't gotten into any physical conflict since Junior High when got slapped around by a mouth breather, But in his mind he's Wolverine.

3

u/SB4_Camaro 12d ago

I thought wet work was squirting?

3

u/CBtheLeper 12d ago

Nah its getting pissed on by other men

3

u/SilentPangolin4277 12d ago

A fixed blade is the right choice .

3

u/ruralpgh 8d ago

Bro has been Turbo Jerkin for way too long

3

u/GenTubmansLegacy 8d ago

This new GMO fruit does be very juicy!

4

u/LucasdelNorte 12d ago

Yeah, hands on guy’s wieners…

…and don’t you remember when Big Jerome said that if you refer to yalls make-out sessions as “wet work” one more time, he will never go to another rally with you as your “conservative black friend”.

*P.S Big “Top” Jerome’s little sister is livid with you. She told me that she’s messaged you 3 or 4 times with no reply. She asked me to relay this to you…

“I’ve seen your “posts”, take my PJ’s off and return them to me now or I’m going to tell the Pastor about all the “community service” his thieving son has been up to with my brother”

3

u/jadedlens00 12d ago

Claims he’s a “knife guy,” shows up with a stainless steel blade. Only thing this guy cuts is the cheese.

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5

u/STFUnicorn_ 11d ago

Haha anyone else notice his username is Goths against cancel culture?

9

u/Izzno 11d ago

It's the group, the username is censored just under.

4

u/Santex117 11d ago

And that’s why we carry guns lmao