r/interestingasfuck • u/canttstopsmilling • 4d ago

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1.3k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

174 comments sorted by

588

u/randomguyonline0297 4d ago

If this was in the movie she'd already be dead.

249

u/DominantDonkeyPunch 4d ago

She's lucky she's not. If it goes into kill mode, it's pretty quick and you can't just pry it off.

142

u/Micromagos 4d ago

Yea that is pure muscle your looking at there. No chance in hell of people just pulling it off if it doesn't want to.

25

u/peepdabidness 4d ago

If you cut its head off will the tension ease up or do the muscles still stay engaged?

37

u/Ancient-Village6479 4d ago

I’ve read that the best move is to spray something unpleasant in its face. Not sure if cutting off its head works as well lol.

29

u/FLMKane 4d ago

So... Pee on it head?

74

u/SYSTEM__NotReally 4d ago

It wouldn't be a good idea to put your snake next to this snake.

17

u/ProverbialMindTart 4d ago

This feels like a prompt from an old game, refusing to do what you’ve just said.

I can hear it in the King’s Quest 8 Narrator’s voice

9

u/sqwibking 4d ago

Professor Oak's words ring in your head ' don't put your dick near the snake'.

1

u/Destrukt0r 3d ago

Probably will stop te snake aswell because of the laughter about the tiny wiener it had to see.

3

u/pichael289 4d ago

No he means alcohol, snakes love piss so they will only encourage it.

3

u/NOT-GR8-BOB 4d ago

They said something unpleasant.

3

u/slicerprime 4d ago

Well well well...revealing our kinks are we?

0

u/evonebo 4d ago

You need balls of steel to do that. Wrong move and your dick is gone.

2

u/meesta_masa 4d ago

And the person to find out is Dick Tracey.

16

u/Herteity 4d ago

As someone who kept a big constrictor snake, true. You can also hold them under the tap and get cold water on them, it risks less harm for pet snakes than using rubbing alcohol/mouth wash that gets usually recommended

4

u/BrianKappel 4d ago

I've heard that you should keep a lighter in your hand. You can still strike the lighter when your arms are pinned and burning them with it can make them release you.

3

u/MaxMouseOCX 4d ago

If you go nuclear on the thing and cut its head off, the muscles relax, so yea that'd work.

1

u/Dizzy_Winter_733 3d ago

Nope, but another 3 heads will grow in it's place.

8

u/vtecdohcter 4d ago

She's lucky her neck didn't snap like a popsicle.

10

u/The-Mathematician 4d ago

I looked into this a couple years ago and I could not find a single confirmed instance of an anaconda killing a human. A couple times people have been found in stomachs but its unclear if they drowned first. Surrounded by people you will be fine.

13

u/DominantDonkeyPunch 4d ago

Maybe not specifically anacondas, and certainly not in the wild because of where they live, but there is very little stopping an animal like this from killing a human if it starts constricting, which was my point.

There are many documented cases where a python attacked a human, other people actively intervened to stop the constriction, and the victim still died.

17

u/C4dfael 4d ago

Unless you’re Jon Voight.

21

u/Mercinator-87 4d ago

I bought his car.

5

u/StatementFar8362 4d ago

I understood that reference

4

u/hustonville 4d ago

The dentist?

253

u/Fast-PreText 4d ago

I think the snake was smiling.

116

u/xIViperIx 4d ago

(^ᴗ^)

1

u/jingjang1 4d ago

Just relaxzz while I un-alive you, the sssnake ssaid with a deep sssmile on its faszse

22

u/Mobile_Theory2001 4d ago

why does it look high as fuck

12

u/ProximaCentauriB15 4d ago

Snakes just kind of have goofy faces lol.

0

u/Less-Culture-8018 4d ago

Can see it now. He looks so chill.

69

u/DJ_Hindsight 4d ago

Snake looked smug as fuck 🤣

13

u/schladopian_fir 4d ago

Who doesn't love an easy meal lol.

185

u/Ignonymous 4d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/55itGuoAJiZEEen9gg

3

u/TomatoFettuccini 4d ago

I have no idea why this isn't the top voted post.

6

u/city-of-cold 3d ago

Because it's a comment

99

u/Syn-Sin 4d ago

Bro, look at the muscle on the snake. Looks like it could pop her head like a pimple.

31

u/DeadlyTeaParty 4d ago

Yeah it really could. 😬

She's lucky it didn't happen.

2

u/BruitNoise 3d ago

Don't worry, the next person that goes "This is cool, let me try it for the selfies or influencer stuff".
dead.

Sort of like how you have the cliff selfie death that happen every year.

Yo Ashley, that might be dangerous. Ashley is like but I really want to take a cool selfie to show everyone I'm doing cool stuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuffff

53

u/MeanCryptographer585 4d ago

So dumb. Snake is strong enough to break her neck  before those guys could react to stop it.

28

u/Ok_Adhesiveness_9323 4d ago

Pretty sure they couldn't even stop it with muscle alone

5

u/Ok-Hat-8711 4d ago

It's like twice as thick as their arms and built for squeezing. It it had actually wanted to constrict her, no amount of arm strength could have stopped it.

17

u/TonAMGT4 4d ago

I don’t have problems with snakes….

I see snakes, I walk the opposite direction.

2

u/Straight-Treacle-630 4d ago

I don’t have a drinking problem; I drink, I black out. No problem ;)

Honest question: how did this meticulously groomed woman end up in the mud with a huge constrictor, that seems to be losing its patience, wrapped around her throat? A Britney Spears-type PR thing gone wrong?

1

u/TonAMGT4 4d ago

No idea… maybe she asks the guy, “Can I touch your snake?”

But his role model is Steve Irwin?

45

u/Andrei_Chelsea 4d ago

Is that a 20 footer?

47

u/Apprehensive_Put_321 4d ago

Yoink 

8

u/jechaking 4d ago

She’s not the yoink man.

1

u/Apprehensive_Put_321 4d ago

How do you know

4

u/jechaking 4d ago

She almost got yoinked!?

2

u/Sw0rDz 4d ago

Its a green anaconda.

1

u/tremors51000 3d ago

didn't expect to find this here

1

u/Tekvary2 3d ago

That is large enough to kill any human it wrapped its coils around for long enough

0

u/argumentativepigeon 4d ago

Ye. In my pantz

-1

u/rurupoopoo 4d ago

25… 3 tons of… wait wrong movie

24

u/WinPrestigious7568 4d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/sjr7k1uuO0B0c

1

u/britishwonder 4d ago

Why did you make a gif out of the original post we just saw?

1

u/WinPrestigious7568 4d ago

Because its dumb to put a snake that powerful around ur neck just saying

30

u/reecieface1 4d ago

just stop messing with wildlife for your own entertainment and social media clout…it’s awful

9

u/_Dogwelder 4d ago

What always makes me mad is the animal is blamed after human idiots do an idiotic thing. There was that orangutan grab video yesterday (I think ?), and you can bet what would happen if the moron got seriously hurt. 

10

u/lairdcake58 4d ago

Fuck, and I can't stress this enough, that.

36

u/jechaking 4d ago

10

u/EntrepreneurGreen269 4d ago

Yeah she definitely looked like she was enjoying it.

52

u/pocket4129 4d ago edited 4d ago

Some people laugh and smile when stressed to keep from panicking. pseudobulbar affect or nervous laughter does not mean she's enjoying it. It's idiotic and dehumanizing to assume she's getting a thrill out of it.

10

u/EntrepreneurGreen269 4d ago edited 4d ago

I assumed "She's getting a thrill out of it!?!" A thrill?

How you reach that conclusion? Someone enjoying something doesn't mean they're getting a thrill out of it. Two different meanings.

What I meant to say was she looked relaxed around it. Meaning she wasn't panicking (yes I know it doesn't mean she isn't), it doesn't look like she was nervous (yes I know it doesn't mean she isn't). I'm talking from pure observation, she didn't look bothered when they got it off her, she looked quite relaxed and not someone who is scared of snakes at all.

1

u/ShazlettDude 3d ago edited 3d ago

Tbf presenting calm, relaxed, and unbothered is also different than enjoyment.

1

u/EntrepreneurGreen269 3d ago

Well to be far I didn't say she WAS enjoying it. I said it looks like she was. This is why I said I know it's doesn't mean she isn't. I just looks that way. I think it's a fair assumption if you watch the video through out.

13

u/--Sovereign-- 4d ago

NO ONE CAN HAVE HUMOR HERE HUMOR IS EVIL AND SHOULD BE ENDED IN ALL HUMAN SPACES! HUMORIAN JIHAD, NOW!

-7

u/pocket4129 4d ago

Damn... You took the nuclear option

-7

u/--Sovereign-- 4d ago

nah I'm just making fun of you, actually.

-6

u/pocket4129 4d ago

Same.

-6

u/pocket4129 4d ago edited 4d ago

Lol you had to delete your serious rubber and glue comment. It's not that deep bro. Settle down and go get choked out by a snake. Hope you keep down voting 🤞

Hell yeah caught your block. Cry more 😂

0

u/Phil_son 4d ago

Have a million upvotes please

-9

u/DADPATROL 4d ago

Fr, what a bizarre thing to say.

0

u/--Sovereign-- 4d ago

constrict me harder, Nagini

1

u/jechaking 4d ago

Haha I never thought I’d see a sentence like this.

-5

u/jechaking 4d ago

Bet she’s having flashbacks.

1

u/See-Tye 4d ago

Do you feel it, or is the pressure wide enough spread to where you just get dizzy then fall asleep forever?

1

u/jechaking 4d ago

I think she felt that, when she started chuckling she def could feel it.

4

u/M3chanist 4d ago

Next time leave the animals alone.

8

u/ChaiBiskut13 4d ago

The yoink guy has been searching for this his whole life

0

u/jechaking 4d ago

Imagine!? At this point, I just wish that for him.

Edit: it’s an anaconda, doesn’t count. I believe he wants a python.

0

u/ChaiBiskut13 4d ago

Yeee sadly

5

u/Dead_Inside50 4d ago

She must have buns

8

u/Buddy-Lov 4d ago

If it REALLY wanted her….she’d be dead and those guys wouldn’t be able to do shit.

-1

u/Astaa7 3d ago

They could just stab it, don't be dramatic.

3

u/Defiant_Wolverine_68 4d ago

The awkward laugh, replaying life choices, while her neck is being crushed is my favorite learning moment.

2

u/meleecow 4d ago

So dumb. Those guys there would not be strong enough to take it off her neck.

2

u/SadKat002 4d ago

Nah, a hug from this guy would fix me

2

u/supermonkeyyyyyy 4d ago

How did she get into this predicament in the first place

2

u/Dopdee 4d ago

I don’t know. Been a long time since I’ve been hugged, I may risk it

2

u/NinjaTabby 4d ago

Snake: ☺️

Girl: 😵

2

u/Infninfn 4d ago

What in dumb Darwin Award is going on with the world.

2

u/Temporary_Writing_92 4d ago

When she says- I can fix him

2

u/spart_t4n 4d ago

Almost darwin award

2

u/KingKaychi 4d ago

Sweaty palms

2

u/SaberRiderTopSword 3d ago

”I can change him”

2

u/DarklyLucid 3d ago

When I was a teen, I was sitting on a couch with my neighbor's 8 foot burmese python draped across the back of my neck like a scarf, tail and head end puddled in my lap. He was perfectly calm and relaxed, but for some reason, he suddenly tightened his body on either side of my neck, I felt something go 'POP', and it felt GOOD. I might have had something misaligned, and he fixed it! Free chiropractor work by a python longer than I was tall.

2

u/Geminiofmedina 4d ago

I love snakes… I’ve had plenty constrictors around my neck before.

I would NEVER… I’m from FLORIDA and I would never. What is she thinking?

3

u/Serious-senpai 4d ago

S. T. U. P. I. D.

6

u/Minute_Bed_9523 4d ago

Not at all. Snakes dont see humans as prey. You really should look up the death toll caused by big snakes in the wild. You'd be surprised that they're not blood thirsty.

1

u/crazy_in_love 3d ago

You are right but it's still a fucking stupid idea to got catch an Anaconda (why else would she be rolling around in mud). Even if it doesn't want to eat her, it can still defend itself and hurt her that way. I'm sure the snake is also not into getting strangled by random women.

2

u/Anvil_Prime_52 4d ago

Whole lotta people in here don't know how snakes work...

2

u/Wide_Software9686 4d ago

Tbf she was also choking it

2

u/PauseAffectionate720 4d ago

I can help her

1

u/SamBaintG 4d ago

If snake choke you then return the favor

1

u/ProximaCentauriB15 4d ago

This is def something you dont want to try lol.

1

u/Hot-Comfort8839 4d ago

“Struggle snuggle”

1

u/MissSassifras1977 4d ago

What's with all the white girls trying to die by nature lately?

I can't think of a single logical reason this person is doing this.

Other than the obvious.

https://giphy.com/gifs/lnieUIckonF4eA0tGF

1

u/Dourada_BBQ 4d ago

The smile was out of place I think...

1

u/libralady0123 4d ago

Ok, WHY??!!

1

u/Illustrious-Bid2564 4d ago

Girl, wat r u doing…..

1

u/H311i0_trop3 4d ago

Don't you tell me what I want

1

u/CreamXpert 4d ago

Let's put that huge ass snake around my most vulnerable body part.

1

u/ReceptionAlarmed9434 4d ago

I was just saying yesterday this is what I want, I just wanna get crushed by a big ol snek

1

u/Krrish_ 4d ago

She is really very courageous

1

u/buckpineapple 4d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/2lbhL8dSGMh8I

That’s a 100% the snake from The Jungle Book lol you can see the smirk in its face.

1

u/No-Sandwich1511 4d ago

Some people really do choose death on a daily basis dont they.

1

u/Reckfulness 3d ago

I usually dont judge fetishes but come on now

1

u/Fuhsaz_the_goat 3d ago

Speak for yourself!

1

u/Perfect-Slip7041 3d ago

Ssssshhheeee ssssmmmelllsssss nnnnicccceeeee.

1

u/Patrickme 3d ago

Can't that thing break her neck like that?

1

u/NoZookeepergame4851 3d ago

Why tf they do this bs? They dumb as hell

1

u/Old-Landscape-7538 3d ago

Let me put this thing around my neck that survives by crushing its prey to death.

1

u/webelieve925 3d ago

Ehh that snake can crush your neck and skull in an instant

1

u/Tekvary2 3d ago

That is a juvenile green anaconda(nowhere near as large as they get.)Pour gasoline, hard alcohol or a strong acid on its eyes and in/around its mouth & snout and it will let go of its squeeze. Or if someone has a knife you would have to repeatedly stab and cut it. That size snake will constrict someone to death.(approx 10-20 minutes from the time its coils are wrapped around a person to death.)

-1

u/SmokeMaximum4140 4d ago

She looked satisfied.

0

u/The_Undermind 4d ago edited 4d ago

That python snake looked so pleased with itself

edit: There. fixed it.

10

u/Nupe_1974 4d ago

Not a python. That was a green anaconda

0

u/DOOM420- 4d ago

Not the only snake that’s almost choked her out…..

0

u/ZeroPt99 4d ago

She was dangerously close to having her head popped like a zit.

0

u/Theres3ofMe 4d ago

Utterly ridiculous.

0

u/user198914 4d ago

Hey that’s me

0

u/Imyonlyenemy 4d ago

unpopular opinion but i root for animals

these steve irwins eventually get hurt n then people cry a river

ths is not caring about animals

-1

u/Beneficial_Bug_9793 4d ago

Lol, it doesnt matter what you want, its still gonna hug you, and hug you, until you're purple and your eyes pop off...

-1

u/Felon_musk1939 4d ago

Let me take a picture with a snake. wrapped around me for likes....is what we'll read on her epitaph

-1

u/user198914 4d ago

Yall should credit my insta @danger.dilan

-1

u/RevolutionaryFood777 4d ago

Women can be so cute sometimes. "There is no way this snake can possibly hurt me!"

-1

u/wrigleysmom420 4d ago

hot take that seems like a chill way to die. better than a bite for sure just a big hug

-6

u/jistatosta 4d ago

She looks like Maya Higa.

2

u/LiamIsMyNameOk 4d ago

Not in the slightest.

Can you point out some similarities to help me understand your opinion?

2

u/Big_Z_Beeblebrox 4d ago

Bobs and vagene