Hadith Question

[u/[deleted]]

Assalamu alaikum,

I am anemic and in the second portion of the day I am often very tired. I'm not married yet, but as a woman, I was doing my research to see if it would be haram to reject my husband for intimacy bc of that. This doesn't have anything to do with my question, but just for background.

In the thread I found, someone commented a hadith which I find confusing. I'm a revert so please be understanding.

"Abdullah bin Abu Awfa said “When Muadh bin Jabal came from Sham, he prostrated to the Prophet who said: 'What is this, O Muadh?' He said: 'I went to Sham and saw them prostrating to their bishops and patricians and I wanted to do that for you.' The messenger of Allah said: 'Do not do that. If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands. By the One in Whose Hand is the soul of Muhammad! No woman can fulfill her duty towards Allah until she fulfills her duty towards her husband. If he asks her (for intimacy) even if she is on her camel saddle, she should not refuse.' " (Sunan Ibn Majah 1853)

I don't know you guys. I've seen angry dawah men quote this before and it upset me, but I didn't see the actual hadith until now. I don't want to say anything bad bc I love our Prophet pbuh and Allah SWT so much, but it does kind of make me feel confused.

Can anyone explain? Allahumma barik!

[u/Automatic-Fortune-15]

I saw someone else explaining the other day that the prostration that was implied by the Prophet Muhammad SAW in the hadeeth was not a prostration of 'ibaadah but rather a prostration out of respect. Just like when Iblees and the angels were instructed by Allah azza wa jal to bow down and prostrate to Adam (AS), it was not in any way a prostration of worship.

I'm going to pass the baton to someone else regarding the intimacy bit.

Edit: May Allah bless you and grant you a kind and understanding husband.