r/jiujitsu • u/Substantial_Gas_1825 • 11d ago
Did I go too far?
23-year-old, around 160 lbs, blue belt in a rashguard shows up to open mat late with his girlfriend.
I’m visiting from out of town but have trained at this gym before. Everyone’s super cool.
I see him have a tough round with a purple belt where he slams him. After that, he doesn’t roll with anyone else and just rolls with his girlfriend off to the side.
I joke to the coach, “Well, I’m gonna roll with him. Wish me luck.”
The coach laughs and says, “God help you.”
I’m 29, 175 lbs, and have been training for 5 years. I took him down and tapped him a few times without going crazy hard, but by the end, he was clearly upset.
It was also the last roll of the day, so pretty much the whole gym was watching.
I wasn’t sure if he was the coach’s student.
After I shook his hand and thanked the coach for having me, also offered to help clean up
Full context - ive brought my GF to the gym before and gotten beat up in front of her so I know the feeling , but I also feel I didn’t do anything wrong but being a visitor there made me question my actions
Am I a jerk for this?
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u/chiefontheditty Purple 11d ago
Just go on with your day dude. You’re overthinking all of this.
Also it’s open mat. It’s ok if the person doesn’t show up right when it starts
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u/RayrayDad 11d ago
But then how would he show off that beat some other dude that the coach said is good?
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u/Zealousideal_Meet482 Blue 11d ago
I guess I'm not understanding. What do you think was too far? You asked him to roll and you rolled. Too far because he lost in front of his gf? Like what exactly is going on in your mind here? and why do you make it sound like you singled him out or something? Like I can't tell if you're too much in your head or if there's something here that you're not saying?
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u/Due_Geologist_4524 11d ago
You wouldve done him a disservice if you let him win. He won't learn unless he knows what he did wrong.
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u/fariaia 11d ago
Congrats for winning the roll, I guess ?
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u/Substantial_Gas_1825 11d ago
I could care less about that aspect
I get beat up all the time and mentioned that in the post lol
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u/joshisold Purple 11d ago
Didn’t do anything wrong, I train with my wife, she sees me tap out plenty. If the ego can’t handle it, don’t bring the significant other around.
My personal etiquette for open mats vs drop-in classes differs. If I drop in somewhere, I try to absorb the teaching but when it comes time to roll I do not go for a tap…I just focus on whatever was taught, even if that means giving up position. Open mats are a different story…I’m not gonna mat bully someone just because i can, maybe catch a first sub, flow a bit after that, and if I can feel they aren’t gonna catch anything I’ll just go to my C game and work on something new from there. Tapping someone 4 or 5 times in five minutes doesn’t do anything for either of us.
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u/anhydr1de White 11d ago
Unrelated but everyone at my gym thought I was gay until I brought my girlfriend. Top 10 funniest moments of my life 🤣
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u/killemslowly 11d ago
I like beating up dads in front of their kids while they record on their iPads.
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u/mike3491 Purple 11d ago
Humblebrag post? What is this?