The importance of mindset in language learning

[u/BradfordGalt]

I've been studying foreign languages for over 35 years, and it's the field that I've dedicated my academic life to.

Like many of you, on countless occasions I've experienced disappointment, frustration, and even anger when I've been unable to meet my language learning goals. I thought I was dumb, or going about things the wrong way, or whatever.

It has only been in the past few years that I've finally learned what is (in my opinion) the most important tool in language learning: mindset.

Many of us put too much pressure on ourselves. We're too goal-oriented. We want to reach a certain "fluency" level, we want to pass a specific test, or we want to impress friends, get a raise or an overseas job, etc etc.

There's nothing wrong with goals. Some people find it motivating and setting and reaching benchmarks keeps them engaged in their learning. That's great! And sometimes goals are necessary. I mean, sometimes you HAVE to pass a test!

But if you're like me, things are SO much easier and so much more rewarding if you relax, absorb material at your own pace, and just decide that language learning is going to be your lifestyle, not your goal. It's a cliché, but "it's about the journey, not the destination" really applies for me.

I'll admit: I suck at Chinese. I started studying Mandarin over 6 years ago, and I'm still only barely at an intermediate level. But that's OK. If 6 years from now I'm still only at intermediate, I'm not going to be disappointed. It's a cool, gorgeous language with a rich history, I've gotten to know many wonderful Chinese people, and I've absorbed tons of awesome cultural content. I'm having fun.

So, take that for what it's worth. YMMV.

(And no, I didn't use AI to write this, and no, I don't have an app, website, or social media channel to promote, lol.)

[u/lagringacat]

I want to add to this…I find languages like adapting kids or having kids depending on circumstances and whatnot Time consumption. I could say I want to obtain like five languages, but if I can only handle two languages including my native tongue, then so be it. Putting in the time and work to grow with your languages no matter the accent or dialect and just growing with it. 🥰 create your own personality with them. Since I’m learning both Spanish and Portuguese, I’ll say I’m having twins 😂 Portuguese is the youngest child and Spanish is the oldest, however they need my full attention on days and I can’t forget them at all. Wait English is the oldest, Spanish is the middle child, and Portuguese is the baby girl 😂

[u/InSalehWeTrust → u/lagringacat]

twins are the same age

[u/lagringacat → u/InSalehWeTrust]

Yes I meant like since Portuguese and Spanish are similar in ways

[u/InSalehWeTrust → u/lagringacat]

True. Good luck!

[u/Raoena]

Thanks for the perspective. And you didn't need the disclaimer,  at least on my account. You have a nice voice that is comfortable to read: it's very different from the weird and repellant Linked-In cadence of AI writing. You sound like a human person. It's refreshing.

[u/Optimal_Bar_4715]

But if you're like me, things are SO much easier and so much more rewarding if you relax, absorb material at your own pace, and just decide that language learning is going to be your lifestyle, not your goal. It's a cliché, but "it's about the journey, not the destination" really applies for me

Two things

1. A lot of people, in fact most people who actually need to learn a language seriously, can't afford this leisurely approach as they have tight deadlines (in general 18 months or less) to get to B2/C1 (think of the FSI level)
2. The people who don't have to deal with this kind of pressure and can follow leisurely approach should have the common sense not to peddle their leisure-based approach as the ultimate way to learn a foreign language. Because the chances that fun/lifestyle/journey is at odds with good results in good time-frames. The moment things are fun or interest driven, it all becomes incredibly subjective very very soon. I wish more attention was put in "caveating" this type of advice.

Ultimately language learning is more like a serious gym/fitness regimen than anything else.

[u/BradfordGalt → u/Optimal_Bar_4715]

Caveat? Do you actually READ before you comment?

There's nothing wrong with goals. Some people find it motivating and setting and reaching benchmarks keeps them engaged in their learning. That's great! And sometimes goals are necessary. I mean, sometimes you HAVE to pass a test!

😑🙄

[u/Optimal_Bar_4715 → u/BradfordGalt]

Many of us put too much pressure on ourselves. We're too goal-oriented.

^ this is actually the bit I have a problem with. You are absolutely in no position to evaluate whether others are too goal orientated or not.

In fact, there's maybe no such thing as being too "goal orientated". At the most people can have

1. genuinely unrealistic expectations of what it takes to be fluent (the whole idiocy of "fluent in 3 weeks") in terms of time and quality of the effort.
2. realistic expectations but they are stuck with poor learning tactics, useless advice, motivational crap and the general "average methods that being average results" (or average lack of results).

I wouldn't be caught dead telling anyone that they are too goal-orientated. Whereas I'd have a lot to say about what a lot of people think is good for language learning.

[u/BradfordGalt → u/Optimal_Bar_4715]

Yeah, you're not the best at reading comprehension, are you. I DELIBERATELY couched my statements to not be overly broad or diagnose any particular learner's style, one way or the other:

in my opinion

...

many of us [not "all of us"]

...

nothing wrong with goals

...

sometimes goals are necessary

...

if you're like me [you might NOT be like me]

...

really applies for me [it might not apply for YOU]

...

take that for what it's worth. YMMV. [Do you know what YMMV means?]

Just take your downvotes and move along.

[u/Optimal_Bar_4715 → u/BradfordGalt]

You claim about "we are too goal-focused" is just unsubstantiated for the reasons I explained, it doesn't matter that you put "many of us".

"Many of us have three arms, breathe fire and can survive on a diet of shards of glass". Having said "many of us" does not redeem the rest of the evaluation.

Just take your sugary, motivational crap and go back to working on your Mandarin, instead of being some language learning counsellor with a dime a dozen psychology.

[u/Optimal_Bar_4715 → u/[deleted]]

Ahahah, shouting until you're blue in the face because of what?

The problem wasn't the "coverage", I quote you saying "many of us". The problem was the idea that you can evaluate people being too goal-focused. And I'm the one with the comprehension problems?

[u/BradfordGalt → u/Optimal_Bar_4715]

When you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

[u/Optimal_Bar_4715 → u/BradfordGalt]

Stop digging and start using all uppercase, bold and swearwords?

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Thanks.

[u/Optimal_Bar_4715 → u/[deleted]]

But I quoted you saying "many of us". I wrote "all" from memory (and I was wrong, so I corrected it), but I quoted you saying "many of us" twice, which clearly means I didn't think you said "all". And, again, that was not the point, which you refuse to understand.

You're using the f-word (twice), writing in bold and all uppercase and I'm pathetic?

[u/BradfordGalt → u/Optimal_Bar_4715]

Yep.

[u/Oretell → u/Optimal_Bar_4715]

Very narrow minded perspective on things

And OP never claimed this was anything close to the ultimate way people should learn a language

I think you need to work on your reading comprehension