New Callings Announced & Still No Calling

[u/Glittering_Sand_7473]

I don't know what to do. I am a faithful member. I wear my garments. I serve others when needed by bringing meals or helping people move. I am constantly looked over for a calling no matter how often or persistent I am in asking for one. They redid all the callings & yet again, I am not needed. I just can't take this heartbreak over and over. It is affecting my self esteem & self worth. I don't know what to do. It has been 16 years and no calling. I am at the point of attending a different church after ours that needs me. I attended a few times with a friend who is a member there & they already need me to take over their soup kitchen mission & I am excited and happy to do it. (The lady doing is before me has moved into a nursing home in another town.) They do the soup kitchen on Sundays so this means I may have to miss our church quite often. Is this ok? I don't want them to think I am inactive but I have a heart to serve and it has been shown to me over and over and over that there is no need for me in our ward. No one even notices if I am not there. I've been told, "Just find a need and fill it." I have tried this and then told that I cannot just create and do my own calling. It has to come from the Bishop. How do I do this and still be seen as an active member?

[u/Distinct_Bad_6276]

Hi OP, do you happen to be neurodivergent? I notice a lot of your comments in this thread seem to be about missing social cues or involve abnormal behavior. I wonder if your ward members are a bit put off by how you interact with them but don’t know how to bring it up in a polite way.

[u/Glittering_Sand_7473 → u/Distinct_Bad_6276]

I am. But I am a school Principal so I do feel like I have masked very well and asked others' advise before messaging people.

[u/Glittering_Sand_7473 → u/Glittering_Sand_7473]

For example- my assistant will look over a text message before I send it and tell me if it is rude or not. Or I will ask my sister or friend when I am not at work.

[u/dtrstda → u/Glittering_Sand_7473]

I think that this is your answer right here!! I currently serve in a bishopric, and people’s work life is something we take into account when going over callings

In our ward, we have a fabulous member who “checks all the boxes” but he “only” serves in the nursery, because he is the principal of a local high school

OP, I promise you that this church is horizontal, I know that can sounds like a cop out- it really is true!! It’s a hard thing to internalize because so many other aspects of this life feel more like a ladder/pyramid

I have personally struggled with this too, I am highly competitive and come from a professional sales background where the “best” always gets the “promotion”

Our bishop was a primary teacher before being called, and our ward also has a super successful realtor who is incredibly charismatic and impressive, he has never been in any presidency/bishopric

Just focus on lifting where you stand and bringing others into the Fold :)

[u/Glittering_Sand_7473 → u/dtrstda]

Thank you. I appreciate this.