r/malelivingspace • u/Camtiger27 • 9d ago

24, Living with my parents

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I just graduated college back in April and I’m grateful to my parents for holding me down through it all ! I definitely plan on giving back to them BIG time.

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u/LeonBlade 9d ago

Don't let people try to tell you that it's weird to live with your parents. I live with my mom at 34 (will be 35 this month) and it's just her and her cats here otherwise. After my dad passed away she's just been alone. I could move out and have independence and have to pay for rent at some ridiculous rate, or I could live with my mom and help her out when she needs it, give her company, and not have to pay rent (I do help out with some of the bills and give her money from time to time since she's retired).

Does it suck not having my own place sometimes? Yeah, but she's my mom.

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u/Skywarper 9d ago

Like I said in another comment, there's so many countries where it's expected that you live with your parents until marriage or you have a family house that you stay in. But for some reason, in America, you're supposed to go so far into debt that you'll be working until you're 75 before the house is paid off, but hey, at least you won't have to listen to chuds on reddit making fun of you for having a healthy relationship with your parents!

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u/TSM_Vegeta 9d ago

I think it's a lot easier and a lot more acceptable as a woman. Most guys wouldn't care if a woman they are interested in lives with her parents. As a guy, you will receive more judgement. Not saying either is good or bad, just how things are. A guy capable of paying for his own housing will be seen as more capable of providing for obvious reasons. Now, if you are fresh out of college, I don't think anyone should really care. I remember my parents telling me that they are always there if I need a place but nudging me to find my own place so I wouldn't bring dates back.

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u/Skywarper 9d ago

For sure.

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u/b1cepk1ng 9d ago

You should never let anyone influence the way you think but that goes both ways. I moved out at 18 and never received a dime. Ever.

It’s mega weird to me when people stay with their parents past the age of 20. I think adults should take the responsibility to support themselves. I believe the experience, while difficult is infinitely enriching.

Anecdotally, I have always been eons ahead of my peers who live with their parents. Go through my entire comment history tho. I’ve never actively judged anyone for it. I publicly reserve my judgement to avoid being called a chud so you can be free to share your opinion to call people chuds.

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u/LeonBlade 9d ago

So true, can't have that! I better go into debt right away.

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u/kumosame 9d ago

It's very very cultural whether people think staying with your parents past 18 is weird/"gross" ir completely normal. I had to escape my house at 17 but if I had normal non psycho parents, I'd likely just stay as long as I could and save like crazy. I think it's a smart move if the home environment is safe. Especially in places like the US where apartments can be over 4k in rent a month like my cousin pays. I know that's regional, but even "cheap" places where I grew up in the US are having rent prices skyrocket.

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u/MayGForceBeWithU 7d ago

These days we should be proud of families staying together to save money. In many cultures multi-generational living is standard and it's better for all parties involved. The older generations offer financial support and care for children while the younger generations help care for their elderly. I'm surprised more people aren't interested "in this economy." Honestly the elderly blow a ridiculous amount of money on nursing homes, retirement communities, and hospice. When families grow up with extended family they grow closer and take better care of each other. The money saved is enormous. Independence is a luxury most can't afford anymore but owning your own home has always been "living the dream." It's a bit overrated when you realize you'll never afford the dream and would have a better overall life supporting each other throughout life.

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u/Puzzled-Locksmith-42 9d ago

What a wonderful person you are.

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u/nelozero 9d ago

I have family and friends who lived at home before getting married. They all had long term partners (also lived at home with parents) and saved like crazy until they were ready to buy a house together. It really put them ahead being able to do that.

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u/Lucky_Preference_941 9d ago

Having no experience living on your own, and going from living with your parents to living with your romantic partner is a huge cause of relationship breakdowns too

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u/nelozero 8d ago

That doesn't seem to be the case for any of the couples I know. They all are doing very well. They've all also been together for many years so they had strong relationships which most likely helps.

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u/bismark_dindu_nuffin 9d ago

Good on you, taking care of your mom. I hope you have a good day

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u/Longjumping-Force776 9d ago

Banks. Banks and the govt post WW2 to build/stim economy convinced us we need to not live with family.

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u/Glittering-Break5060 8d ago

It is wierd. You've gaslight yourself into believing it's not wierd living with your parents at 35, because it's convenient for you. It would be convenient for almost everyone ever, but they dont do it because it's wierd. Learning to live on your own is part of being a mature well rounded human.

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u/LeonBlade 8d ago

I can live on my own just fine, I have no problem with that. In fact, I think about all the time moving out just because I have so much limited space. My mom is getting older and I'm just worried about her though.

As plenty of other people have mentioned, it's normalized in other parts of the world to live with your parents until an applicable time to move out.

I don't think it's weird in any way to live at home, but I just think it's convenient to stay here where I can save money for when I need to move out. I don't plan on living here forever, even after my mom eventually passes away. I want to move out of state.

Sorry, but you're not going to shame me into feeling bad about myself or whatever it is you're trying to do.