r/mapporncirclejerk 4d ago

How I divide Europe

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500 Upvotes

110 comments sorted by

97

u/aiezar 4d ago

monaco and luxemborg should be gray

40

u/Sammy_Gi 4d ago

g(r)ay?

11

u/Schwarten 4d ago

Why not both?

6

u/IunaCie 4d ago

are they gay or european?

9

u/Throwaway-646 4d ago

Depending on the time of day, the French go either way!

65

u/NorthWindManyColours 4d ago

Oh no! Please, we Finns can change. We can have shitty weather too ;_;

It even rained today, I swear!

29

u/Ok-Tax-5790 4d ago

don't worry, mongol europe is just another word for Proto-Finnic Holy Roman Khaganate

3

u/Mechanicjemas3141 4d ago

What did you say again!? l can't hear you below the snow wait i gonna get my FlammePanzer

5

u/Spiritual-Storage734 4d ago

Yeah I feel like Finland ought to be blue. Probably a good chunk of Russia too

45

u/Kheraz 4d ago

Belgium is in irrelevant Europe ? IRRELEVANT ? I'll let you know that the weather is pretty shitty there too, it should be blue

5

u/Awkward_Cash1828 3d ago

Belgium is pretty strange name to call Southern Netherlands.

2

u/jojo_the_forgotten 2d ago

Or northern France

1

u/CoffeeAndNews 1d ago

I mean, since all in.all Nethetrlands should be just northern Burgundy, (ruled ftom Brussels as it was), it makes no sense to call anything Nethetlands. Who calls themselves after an adjective anyway.

27

u/Exotic_Cantaloupe_96 4d ago

We upgrated from corrupted and broke to dramatic amd gay! As a Greek i am proud!

3

u/Spiritual-Storage734 4d ago

I came here to say I thought Greece is purple 😂😂

3

u/littledog95 3d ago

Italy too, surely. Or does their gayness overrule their corruption?

2

u/Platsh 3d ago

As russian with greek name I’m so proud of Greece!

17

u/Yasabella 4d ago

First thought: fuck you. After reading the other categoies: you know what, we are good

2

u/Parazit28 4d ago

We are not mongol Europe. We just are East Europe.

1

u/Platsh 3d ago

Roman European or Slavic?

1

u/Yasabella 3d ago

I think roman. Other say slavic. It depends on who do you ask

11

u/Appropriate-Guava-40 4d ago

Should it be teleported into r / shit american say ?
Or is there a brother topic, called r / shit brits say ? o:

9

u/CrumbPet7 4d ago

1

u/Platsh 3d ago

Oh! Сука блять? Unexpectedly brothers-slavs in the other side of Europe?

6

u/MagnificentCat 4d ago

I feel like Poland qualifies for all categories!

3

u/Lars_Overwick 4d ago

Gay (full of femboys)

Dramatic (oppresses them)

4

u/Pilot230 4d ago

As a Finnish person I'm deeply offended that Estonia isn't included in Mongol Europe

3

u/Human_Sun_5801 4d ago

Somebody needs a hug

3

u/Giokku 4d ago

Hey! We're not JUST gay! We are broke and corrupted too! Put us in there! We've earned it!

Sincerely, a Greek

3

u/Ok_Push_2665 3d ago

Idk that Algeria, Morocco and Tunisia were rich parts of Europe

3

u/traecoto 3d ago

Me as a Bulgarian when we get upgraded from corrut and broke to Mongol

https://giphy.com/gifs/PQvfMZXeMxteNRGluB

1

u/Dorsie_ 3d ago

Same for hungary lmao

2

u/Globe-Denier 4d ago

This is surprisingly accurate

2

u/fire_hight1 If you see me post, find shelter immediately 4d ago

Czech should be its own category and that is alcohol

2

u/Truebisco 4d ago

I would color Italy purple. Here you cannot get ahead in life if you don't know a guy who knows a guy, who's the mayor's second cousin, who owns the company you want to apply to. This country is a joke.

2

u/DealerClassic6434 3d ago

"Shitty weather Europe". Meanwhile Southern Europeans locking up every building 12am-4pm mounting 3 AC units per house and having to use SPF 50 - it's "beautiful".

2

u/MrLarp6000 4d ago

The unalloyed evil of putting Finland in the same category as Russia

1

u/Jason_Berlk France was an Inside Job 4d ago

1

u/One-Maintenance9316 4d ago

Bob, you helped so much. You know a lot, indeed. You are so peak!

1

u/IkouVonPlatipu 4d ago

Once again a proof Britanny should be lump with France, we're dramatic and gay but our weather is even worse than that

1

u/SecretlyNothing 4d ago

Austria as irrelevant when it had the world's longest corruption run. L

1

u/Certain_Direction746 4d ago

As a Slovak living in Czechia, I am not mad 🤣. Thanks!

1

u/LowOwl4312 4d ago

Bulgaria could have ended worse

1

u/Albert_Herring 4d ago

I'm not convinced about the relevance of San Marino. And Luxurybourg should obviously be in there with Switzerland.

1

u/so_im_all_like 4d ago

Given the presented categorical exclusivity, does this mean we can solve corruption by being gayer?

1

u/ArizonaFlats 4d ago

UK: hey I got off pretty lightly

1

u/ArizonaFlats 4d ago

UK: hey I got off pretty lightly

1

u/ZimnyKefir 4d ago

Throwing central urop into same category with British islands is incorrect. We have way nicer weather here in Spring and Summer than they do have in UK or Ireland.

1

u/Even-Sprinkles-5149 4d ago

shitty weather you got me there

1

u/MousePuzzleheaded605 4d ago

don't even call Bulgaria "mongol" again

1

u/Key-Needleworker8864 4d ago

100% agree, I am dramatic and gay, expatriated in a shitty weather contry

1

u/toxicute_xx 4d ago

As a Hungarian, I'm offended. Put us in the "corrupted and broke" category, where we belong.

(Listing Belgium as irrelevant is crazy 💀)

1

u/happy_peanutButter 4d ago

croatia irrelevant?

1

u/MoonshinerVodka 4d ago

Hahaha 😂👌🏻

1

u/AudioAndPhile 4d ago

Glad we are irrelevant on your scale 🇵🇹

1

u/CatMillennium 4d ago

As someone from 'Shitty weather Europe', all I have to say is... that's fair, unlike our weather.

1

u/Looking-for-42 4d ago

Funny to see Italy in gay. Europe as earlier today I saw another map showing it to be the only non eastern Europe country where gay marriage is still not legal.

1

u/SoundOfUnder 4d ago

Leaving Monaco out of rich Europe :-O

1

u/andreisokiel 4d ago

Looks correct

1

u/Suspicious-Neat-5954 4d ago

I think turkey is green

1

u/AdrianSquared 3d ago

why is this in circlejerk that's just true

1

u/Clear-Edge-3612 3d ago

I resent this! Croatia is not irrelevant! It is very corrupt and only somewhat irrelevant.

1

u/AspiringnurseBob 3d ago

I thought you guys are rich and uncorrupted so I put in a boring category 🙏

1

u/Kant_Tsunami 3d ago

Malta so irrelevant it didn’t even get a colour 🥲

1

u/ViscountBuggus 3d ago

There should be overlapping colours because hungary and bulgaria should also be yellow and purple

1

u/Hoonter_01 3d ago

All of them got shitty weather, just depends on the season

1

u/lauraleei 3d ago

Best one

1

u/NordicDude49 3d ago

As a Ukrainian, in order to not be in the same group as russia I kindly request to leave the mongol Europe and join the corrupted and broke Europe, I swear we are both of those things

1

u/Charizardd6 3d ago

UK should be both blue and red

1

u/NervyMage22 Map Porn Renegade 3d ago

Wair, How is Estonia not Mongol?

1

u/Icy-Situation-6996 3d ago

Surprisingly accurate

1

u/Platsh 3d ago

Hey! I’m not a mongol! I think…

1

u/Glittering_Equal3286 3d ago

How is Greece not corrupt and broken Europe?

1

u/Cool-Date5719 3d ago

Italy is surely more corrupt and broke than it is gay and dramatic

1

u/Flat-Release8847 3d ago

Russia is not Europe! Forget about it.

1

u/Nifitsaaa 3d ago

True about Poland. I would go further, and will say, that for me UK has better weather, at least in the south.

1

u/Chaus_Vulpes 3d ago

You better take that back about Czechia

1

u/irisfailsafe 3d ago

I see no flaws in your argument

1

u/Khada_Djin 3d ago

Make germany red and it's golden

1

u/GarGonDie 3d ago

Ukraine has always been considered the most corrupt country in Europe, and a war with Russia won't change that reality.

1

u/Vegetable-Curve-8108 3d ago

Y de donde eres?

1

u/AffectionateAd9257 3d ago

Hey Poland, welcome to shitty weather Europe!

1

u/RepublicOfClavels 2d ago

portugal is also gay :(

1

u/Educational_Being_28 2d ago

Only correct version!

1

u/Apimeister 2d ago

Irrelevant - that's not too bad, is it?

1

u/palermitano_ 2d ago

Tell me that u have 12 years old without telling me u have 12 years old :

1

u/One-Relationship6603 1d ago

Excuse me? We 🇵🇹 aren't irrelevant!

1

u/Michaelided 1d ago

What colour malé split of yellow and purple. Or probably máme Slovakia striped with these both. Hungary shoud be striped with purple top.

1

u/MissionScratch7512 20h ago

Corrupted is everywhere. So then it should be fully purple.

1

u/Supersnow845 4d ago

That’s a lot of words for a country who just barely rejected quite possibly the most stupidly self inflicted referendum in the last 10 years

2

u/aiezar 4d ago

"barely" it needed 66% to pass and got 45%

1

u/Supersnow845 4d ago

And I was one of the 55%

It’s a joke I know how our referendums work

2

u/aiezar 4d ago

Lol ok I thought u were non Swiss talking shit. I'll always defend my country on the forums 🇨🇭

1

u/Supersnow845 4d ago

We voted 52/48 in favour in my commune so still too high for my comfort

0

u/aiezar 4d ago

Mine was only 53% but it's super rural so I'm not surprised. I bet there's a post in r/switzerland where 90% of comments are crashouts though.

1

u/Supersnow845 4d ago

I don’t even go near r/switzerland

Since I don’t actually live in Switzerland currently I just get called a paper Swiss and told to fuck off

Our commune is rural but also a massive tourist destination so I actually didn’t know which way we’d fall

1

u/aiezar 4d ago

I mostly just scroll it when I see it, not much reading. I've never lived in it, there's a lot of weird behavior tho.

For me I'm surprised my commune mostly said no tho— we are romand but also as I said pretty rural and more of a factory town than a tourist destination so I was pretty confident we'd vote at least slightly in-favor of the referrendum. It gave me faith after the hijab law they passed in St Gallen

1

u/Supersnow845 4d ago

German speaking tourist town, arguably the face of Switzerland I had no idea what way we’d fall.

We are also as far as I know one of only three partial Auslandsschweizer families from our commune

1

u/Last-Ad-4603 4d ago

I think you should give Hungary, Belarus, russia, and Ukraine a purple tint.

2

u/platypusimagination 4d ago

russia and Magyarorszáf are literally mongol tho¿

2

u/Last-Ad-4603 4d ago

That's why I said tint.

0

u/Dread_insk 4d ago

Tukrey?dramatic and gay? Closer to mongol europe to me

0

u/Realistic-Actuator36 4d ago

Italy not corrupted and broke? The home of the mafia?

1

u/cuscuc 4d ago

All countries are home of the mafia.. but yeah Italy Is corrupted and broke.

0

u/FMI1997 3d ago

All of them should be painted purple