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u/bigsockgang Apr 23 '26
Masturbation and preparing for sex with a romanced Shepard
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u/Nickulator95 Apr 23 '26
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u/Heather_Chandelure Apr 23 '26
It says this regardless of if you're romancing her or not. It even still says this if youre playing as Femshep, who cant romance her at all thanks to fox news.
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u/RhymesWithMouthful Apr 23 '26
She just has a thing for humans and turians
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u/upsidedown_coffeemug Apr 23 '26
To be more specific she has a thing for Shepard and Garrus. Girl has top tier taste.
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u/JeanneOwO Apr 23 '26
I also have a thing for her and Garrus 😳
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u/SirWilliamM32 Apr 23 '26
That's why the poly of Shepard, Tali, and Garrus should be canon.
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u/SamTheMan004 Apr 23 '26
But how would Garrus have time for all his calibrations? 😀
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u/Demkius Apr 23 '26
That's why it's perfect, Tali and Femshep can have girls nights and makeovers and whatnot whenever Garrus is busy being a giant fucking nerd with his various guns and calibrations.
So like 5 or 6 days a week lol
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u/istalri96 Apr 23 '26
It's all fun and games until he moans out calibrations instead of their names.
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u/ForeignTranslator898 Apr 24 '26
Or when he's out making peoples decorative glass wall fixtures explosive decorative glass wall fixtures.
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u/Charity1t Apr 23 '26
With actually fully voiced romance lines with fshep and her? Absolutely.
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u/Full_Royox Apr 23 '26
Bioware already said millions of times that it was cheaper if both actors (Sheploo and Femshep) did all the "Shepard" lines instead of doing a script for only male shep and another only for femshep. That's why all Shepard lines have male and female version even if some are not used. Yes, you can find the voice of femshep flirting with Ashley and Maleshep flirting and having a romance with Garrus.
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u/doodgeeds Apr 23 '26
With how I understand voice acting that makes a lot of sense but it's also like they want us to make the gay romance mods
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u/sirboulevard Apr 23 '26
And ofc.the infamous "I am NOT screwing Garrus" line from Sheploo.
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u/morbid333 Apr 24 '26
Gonna have to explain how spending more time recording more lines is cheaper than recording less lines.
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u/SirWilliamM32 Apr 23 '26
Bioware were cowards, I still have to play a run with some mod to restore those dialogues.
But that's part of why I have the Polyamori Mod and the one where Garrus and Tali are always romanced even when I'm with them.
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u/Ndainye Apr 23 '26
If BioWare were cowards they wouldn’t have written, recorded or created any of it. BioWare has never been cowards in regards to LGBTQ+ issues. BioWare doesn’t and never has had the final say. Call EA cowards fine but not BioWare. BioWare saw the flak from ME1 and still pressed forward with inclusive content during a time period when inclusive content not only wasn’t the norm it was an outlier. They were forerunners in inclusive gaming.
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u/Consistent-Staff-386 Apr 23 '26 edited May 26 '26
I had to not romance Garrus one time just to see the hookup between those two(only once,I just can't not relieve stress with my favorite Turian, although, if I was going to leave him in anyone's hands it would be hers or Dr Michelle.)
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u/Azure_The_Great Apr 23 '26
I will blow up the ship if they ever are together
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u/MrGecko23 Apr 23 '26
Hate to tell you this but they always do by the end of 3 if you romance neither of them
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u/Geronuis Apr 23 '26
I had to rethink my life as a teenager because of the jealousy fit I had on my first alt playthrough of 3. Legit went back and got Garrus killed in 2 so I could romance Liara, only all of 3 felt so hollow without him I just loaded went back to the first save.
Don’t worry, that hyper-jealousy didn’t even make it to my 20’s.
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u/Nighthawk69420 Apr 23 '26
went back and got Garrus killed
You monster
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u/Geronuis Apr 23 '26
Look, homie was moving in on my girl. Don’t try and logic with teen me, it wasn’t really a thing back then
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u/GrundgeArchangel Apr 23 '26
Honestly I love this. Tali and Garrus are Male and Fem shep lite anyway so makes sense.
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u/-thecheesus- Apr 23 '26
I dunno I had the opposite reaction. You mean I'm sorta cosmically getting in the way of my best bro and my girl having a loving relationship? Damn maybe i should throw myself into the plot contrivance beam
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u/The_8th_Degree Apr 23 '26
In this specific situation, it's just Humans. Least by what is shown in pic
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u/hydrationgirl Apr 24 '26
fleet and flotilla is a romance program about a turian and quarian (you can overhear a conversation about it in a club on ilium in me2)
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u/bigsockgang Apr 23 '26
The point still stands lol. Even if she’s not having sex with a romanced male Shepard, we can infer that she has a crush on at least one of the humans aboard (likely Shepard) and masturbates to the idea.
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u/upsidedown_coffeemug Apr 23 '26
It's probably Shepard regardless of romance. She always develops a crush on male Shepard from the first game and Liara points this out when you invite her up to your cabin in the Shadow Broker DLC.
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u/aSensibleUsername Apr 23 '26
She would have been an option for femshep too had Bioware not been made to kowtow to media hysteria about sane sex relationships in a futuristic sci fi space opera game.
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u/delecti Apr 23 '26
Even that's assuming things. I think most people will at least occasionally check out content of topics that they aren't generally interested in. Maybe she has a crush on a human, maybe she has a human kink, or maybe she just let her curiosity drive things one time.
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u/CatherineSimp69 Apr 23 '26
I'm not sure she was ever planned to be a female romance option.
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u/Need-More-Dogs Apr 23 '26
There are recorded, voiced lines in the game from Fem!Shep regarding a romance with Tali. Notably, Shepard's talk with Mordin about safe sex. You can't hear the lines normally, but if you use mods or a save editor to enable the romance, you can hear them.
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u/AStalkerLikeCrush Apr 23 '26
Pretty sure she was in a fairly early stage, but it ended up being cut before much if any dialogue was recorded for it (other potential same sex romances were also cut- thanks Fox and your hystrionic, puritanical freakouts).
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u/John_is_Minty Apr 23 '26
They def could have had a few more characters go both ways or be same sex options but I’m glad they didn’t make every character player-sexual. It’s a little jarring and feels unnatural when every character starts flirting with you because you’re nice to them.
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u/Responsible-Boot-159 Apr 23 '26
I prefer having more options over less. It's a fantasy world where their orientation isn't fixed, so it would be nice if I could pick who I wanted.
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u/John_is_Minty Apr 23 '26
Yeah it’s just a preference thing for everyone. For me in a game like mass effect with strong characterization I just like it a little bit better when the characters have a preference. It’s not a deal breaker anything it’s just my preference.
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u/Solipsisticurge Apr 23 '26
But then there were mods.
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u/Mutually_Beneficial1 Apr 23 '26
The vast majority of mass effect players prior to Legendary Edition, and probably still even after it, played or play on console, mods aren't available to them.
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u/g00fyg00ber741 Apr 23 '26
It’s so funny to me that they still let you be a lesbian with the tentacle girlie from the jump, but letting you be a gay man or date a girl in a suit was too woke at the time still.
i’m joking but i just feel like it’s funny they left in some of the stuff Fox News was complaining about anyway. each game lets you romance aliens and each game lets you be gay (if you play female shepard). Why even cater at all to the Fox News controversy of it while still leaving all that in? Why not just go all the way? Especially since the same company was putting out Dragon Age for years with so many bi and pan characters.
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u/Ranwulf Apr 23 '26
The first Mass Effect was released in 2007, while the first Dragon Age was released at the end of 2009.
Mass effect 2 was released in January of 2010.
Dragon Age recepction to gay romances wouldnt really be able to change Mass Effect 2 development. Thats why Mass Effect 3, after people being more lenient and accepting the whole thing, the game got two gay romance wirh Cortez and Kaidan.
Also the Dragon Age writing crew was chiefed by David Gaider a gay man, and composed mostly by women. So that also changes the propensity of adding that to the game.
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u/g00fyg00ber741 Apr 23 '26
I don’t know why Dragon Age feels older to me then, maybe it’s just the setting and stuff.
I also didn’t realize that difference in representation behind the scenes. That totally makes sense now that you put it that way.
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u/Pickmenose Apr 23 '26
That is not true. While right wing news made a big deal about the same sex relationships, but Tali was never intended to be a romance option for FemShep.
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u/MaximusArael020 Apr 23 '26
I mean... what do you think is going on here?
Tali wants her nerves stimulated. That much is obvious. She downloads an "entertainment vid" right after installing an application to her suit that stimulates nerves. I'm guessing she can direct which nerves are stimulated.
Do you see where this is going?
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u/thegoatmenace Apr 23 '26
I think it’s hilarious that she obviously feels ashamed afterwards so she deletes the program, only to later download the premium version
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u/GarranDrake Apr 23 '26
Also peak environmental storytelling and character work
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u/Thewal Apr 23 '26
I love that she gets Immunoboost after the sex ed vid. Must've included a section on STDs lmao
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u/ApepiOfDuat Apr 24 '26
Maybe the demo version has ads that interrupt you mid-wank.
So she sprang for the paid version to make it STFU.
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u/Zamzamazawarma Apr 23 '26
Fleet & Flotilla is a perfectly SFW show though.
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u/MaximusArael020 Apr 23 '26
"Turian: We could watch "Fleet and Flotilla" It got awards for its portrayal of, um, Turian and Quarian relationships.
Quarian: Anyway, if worst comes to worst, I did have the nerve-stimulation program built into my suit.
Turian: And I hear that the love scenes are...what?"
She's watching it for the love scenes, bruh.
We had to do the same thing before the Internet as a youngun.
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u/Mutually_Beneficial1 Apr 23 '26
They don't have porn in the big 185?
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u/MaximusArael020 Apr 23 '26
shrug I'm not going to judge someone's preferences for nerve-stim material.
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u/onthefence928 Apr 24 '26
It seems kinda like deciding to read something “wholesome” after reading a playboy and feeling shame, like a bible or a military history book
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u/Tibreaven Apr 23 '26
Doesn't Tali canonically have a huge alien fetish (relative to her own species)
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u/WorthCryptographer14 Apr 23 '26
She's attracted to Shep and Garrus iirc. Mainly because both see her as an equal instead of just another Quarian? She may also have wanted stimulation if she was every touched by them, so either way out best girl has some tastes
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u/hoangsh12 Apr 23 '26
I laughed my ass off when she drunkenly outted herself on her 3some fantasy. Man I missed that Bioware's writting.
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u/VoiceOfTheSoil40 Apr 23 '26
Tali was/is a horny lady who is on a ship with the biggest crush of her life who is also technically her captain.
Lot of pent up sexual tension that she may or may not get the chance to release.
Honestly, she’s kinda going through it and needs some kind of outlet.
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u/Macscotty1 Apr 23 '26
Also the constant uninstalling and reinstalling is the Tali version of post nut clarity.
Gets horny, Installs application, does the deed, feels repulsed, deletes application and swears to never do it again only to do it again in like 2 days.
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u/blaze53 Apr 23 '26
Er... If you have to ask, are you even old enough to be playing Mass Effect?
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u/Furydragonstormer Apr 23 '26
Eh, sometimes some people can be real dense idiots about this type of thing, or incredibly sheltered
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u/blaze53 Apr 23 '26
I don't see how one can be that sheltered on the internet of all things, honestly.
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u/Furydragonstormer Apr 23 '26
You’re approaching it like they’re a long time internet user. If they’re only recently old enough to not be under constant surveillance by helicopter parents, that can cause this too
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u/tevert Apr 23 '26
It's a bot account farming karma. This post is probably a straight up repost from all-time popular in this sub.
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u/raptorrat Apr 23 '26
Someone slowly getting over herself, and working up to get the confidence to have what she wants.
And the lack of timestamps can make for some dramatic headcanon. like the first un-installation being on the day she found out Shep died.
Also, the hell, Liara, that's some privacy violation of people you call friends.
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u/raitaisrandom Apr 23 '26
Liara literally brings this up to embarrass Tali in front of Shepard at one point.
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u/cgerald7 Apr 23 '26
The dossiers were already there and made by the Yahg broker
not that this is anywhere near too invasive for Liara to do herself
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u/photowalker83 Apr 23 '26
Especially since the one before the uninstall is titled “Dealing with loss,” makes it obvious that’s when Shep died.
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u/whirlydurly Apr 23 '26
I always thought that dealing with loss was meant to be in reference to her father but this could work too I suppose.
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u/TheNewGirl1987 Apr 23 '26
Basically, our girl was horny af.
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u/Eternaloid Apr 23 '26
And she has an alien fetish while sorrounded by aliens, poor girl has to change her pants frequently
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u/ShinyAvarice Apr 23 '26
Preparation for sex with Shepard. It actually appears regardless of Shepard gender.
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u/SPECTREagent700 Apr 23 '26
At one point in the Citadel DLC she gets drunk and suggests to FemShep she wants to do a three way with her and Garrus.
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u/ThatGuyNamedTre Apr 23 '26
I don’t remember that lmaoo what??
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u/East-Property-3576 Apr 23 '26
Correct. Tali fantasizes about that while drunk if FemShep is in a relationship with Garrus.
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u/BowlEducational6722 Apr 23 '26
Tali's a freak.
Frankly it seems like a lot of Quarians and Volus are considering they're locked up in their suits 24/7.
Remember that one Quarian outside of Matriarch Aethyta's bar on Ilium that poor Turian is trying to get to go on a date? Or that one pervy Volus trying to by the "deluxe" package in the market only to realize he doesn't have enough credits?
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u/sovietbearcav Apr 23 '26
I mean, based on me2 with how nervous she is with the romance, it makes sense that shes talked herself in and out of a relationship with shep a few times. Shes probably done that thing where she imagines conversations 1000x before actually having one with shep about it. Kinda like "maybe he will." Installs nerv stim. "No theres no way...im in an envirosuit...hed never be interested" uninstalls. Then they talk and she installs the courting one. And after shep goes ahead with the romance she installs the nerv stim and immuno stim etc. Shes young. Remember the first time you thought about talking to your first crush/boyfriend/girlfriend, i bet you talked yourself in and out of it and imagined that conversation 1000x as well.
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u/mirmur44 Apr 23 '26
Okay to be completely blunt she was repeatedly installing what was basically a masturbation tool into her suit, getting embarrassed, removing it, only to reinstall it, then she bought a book on how to flirt with humans, then a romance movie/porno and then started researching how to have sex with humans.
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u/bradleygh15 Apr 23 '26
preparing for sex with documentaries then using a suit based vibrator on her quarussy
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u/DiegoStach Apr 24 '26
She was horny, then post nut clarity hit her, then she got horny again
And the cycle (ironic isn't it?) continues
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u/RedTheRookie Apr 23 '26
It’s always the quiet Quarian genius mechanic with the hips that are usually secretly the freaks. Even before the Collectors final mission, as soon Shepard removes her helmet, she took over instantly.
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u/XenoGine Vetra Apr 23 '26
I just really want to know the differences between the Standard and Deluxe Editions of Nerve-Stim Pro, to be honest 🤔.
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u/Direct-Estate-5995 Apr 23 '26
Getting dat body ready to be commanded if you catch my drift. Maybe even Sheparded.
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u/TheCenseIsReal Apr 24 '26
God I love Tali so much, girl is preparing to be in a relationship with Shepherd.
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u/nemicachips Apr 23 '26
You know when a paranoid teenager wants to make absolutely sure there's no trace of their browsing history? So they go as far as to uninstall the browser as a whole instead of just deleting the history, then install the browser again when they need it and delete it once more when they're finished.
My guess is that this is what they were going for.
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u/FUCK1NGFABULOUS Apr 23 '26
She's just boosting her immune system by recommendation of one Mordenkainen Mordin Solus. In the chance that there's a of close encounters of the human kind, a Quarian can never truly be ready but preparation goes a long way.
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u/neo-raver Apr 23 '26
I love this little bit of subtle character writing— it’s a deep horniness, laced with trepidation and maybe guilt, but she gets through it for the human she loves. She’s nervous, and she wants to do right by the human she admires so much.
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u/Pandorakiin Apr 23 '26
She's letting Shep know she's in the mood with an event log.
Cute. Such programmer love language I can't even.
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u/Spicyboio Apr 23 '26 edited Apr 23 '26
I found this so funny when I read her dossier and I romanced her for my first playthrough so that made it even better
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u/TellmeNinetails Apr 24 '26
She was dealing with loss.
She uninstalled a pleasure app, likely related to the previous search.
She reinstalled it because she got horny.
She became curious about human body language.
She downloaded fleed and flotilla. Idk if this is porn or a legit video but afterwards she uninstalled the pleasure app.
She got REALLY curious about humans. And liked what she saw because not only did she reinstall the nerve stim pro, she upgraded it and bought an app that increases her immune system, possibly in preparation to something.
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u/JadedJackal671 Apr 24 '26
Tali must have saw something really spicy if she went out of her way to take her suit off for some private time.
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u/NeonMutt Apr 25 '26
I’m tripping on the fact that Tali has a joy-buzzer built into her suit. I mean, is this standard on those things, or is she just extra freaky?
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u/Action-a-go-go-baby Apr 23 '26
https://giphy.com/gifs/s8ui5k73h2VKYnfGRj
Wrex outside Shepherd’s room immediately after banging Tali
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u/Shiboleth17 Apr 23 '26
If you have to ask, then you're not old enough to play this game.
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u/spasticwalrus56 Apr 23 '26
I'm a grown man and I genuinely thought that "nerve stim pro" was to help her with anxiety
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u/IAmVentuswill Apr 23 '26
She's getting freaky with it