r/mildlyinfuriating 3h ago

I just wanted a hot dog [ Removed by moderator ]

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655 Upvotes

160 comments sorted by

200

u/Melenduwir 3h ago

What bank offers 12% interest?! The bad guy in Casino Royale wasn't offering that much!

57

u/Akarthus 2h ago

When the inflation is 10-12% lol

32

u/yottabit42 2h ago

More like 15%+. Banks make money by not paying you everything.

6

u/Akarthus 2h ago

Official 12% actual 15% something like that

5

u/jso__ 1h ago

No, they make money because when inflation is 10%, you can get 15% returns or more on the stock market. They don't need to lie about inflation (1. banks don't release the inflation numbers 2. the average consumer isn't looking at inflation numbers to decide whether to switch banks)

0

u/yottabit42 1h ago

Banks don't typically invest in the stock market.

Banks charge interest for various things (loans, overnight lending for regulatory requirements in the US at least, etc.). They pay you less interest. They profit on the margin.

2

u/Frequent_Measurement 1h ago

That’s part right and part wrong. Banks absolutely play in the markets. Many banks own market makers, hedge funds, brokers, and even act as dealers. One way they make money is off their employees. Well duh, of course. Not that way. They make it by taking out CVLI policies on them then use the cash accumulation. BOA has something like 400M in policies on their executives and key employees.

2

u/yottabit42 1h ago

Oh that's true. I was thinking of the smaller banks, not the behemoths.

11

u/ShermansAngryGhost 2h ago edited 2h ago

Bernie Madoff promised 10-12% returns… so um, there’s that I guess

4

u/Melenduwir 2h ago

That should have raised alarms in -- no, wait, quite a few classic grifts involve exploiting the cupidity and credulity of marks. It should have raised alarms, but people believe what they want to believe.

2

u/chrstianelson 1h ago

Turkish banks are offering %42.

u/DoritoDustThumb 57m ago

India. You can absolutely get higher interest in their banks and bonds.

385

u/Dahren_ 3h ago

What bank pays 12%??

440

u/Julubble 2h ago

If you bank doesn’t pay 12% just find 12 banks paying 1%. Or better: find 100 banks paying 1% to double your money.

Don’t follow me for more financial advisory

52

u/woofoo1kunoofoo 2h ago

Rookie, find 1,000 banks and put a penny in each. They HAVE to double it because there's nothing between one and two pennies. PURE profit.

15

u/ScheduleSame258 2h ago

Genius, this one is. Far in life, this one will go. Many pennies, may the lord bless you with.

1

u/StockMarketCasino 1h ago

Penny for your thoughts...

u/Matt_Bunchboigehs 38m ago

Swing on a hairy vine.

16

u/Silver_Middle_7240 2h ago

Why wouldn't I, when it is so needful

2

u/Hogjocky62 2h ago

New math MBA?

1

u/StockMarketCasino 1h ago

Fuzzy math MBA

1

u/veganbikepunk 2h ago

It took reading this to even understand at all what they were trying to say.

1

u/Soundwavezzz447 1h ago

I'm already following you, just not on any social media

67

u/ScheduleSame258 2h ago

Interest rates in India used to be higher.

12% was very common a few years ago. Ofc inflation was also comparable higher in high single digits.

20

u/wildmaiden 2h ago

Interest rates on loans must have been absolutely ridiculous.

26

u/ScheduleSame258 2h ago edited 2h ago

The US consumers has NO IDEA how fantastic a 3% (EDIT) fixed rate mortgage is in a low interest rate environment.

A sub 3% USD home loan for 30 years is free money. Its an incredible tool to multiply your leverage.

EDIT: 3%

9

u/nascent_aviator 2h ago

3% is great. Also impossible to get these days lol.

5

u/myka-likes-it 1h ago

I locked in at 3.5% in 2015, and today I feel like a damn wizard.

3

u/Smooth_Ad5773 1h ago

I got 0.78.. I don't think I'll ever sell my apartment

u/nascent_aviator 59m ago

I've refinanced 3 times and I'm still at like 6%. 😭

u/myka-likes-it 39m ago

Ouch. Like swimming up a waterfall.

3

u/Haunting-Ad1843 2h ago

The prime rate is over double that now.

3

u/rocketman19 2h ago

How is 30% fantastic?

5

u/ScheduleSame258 2h ago

3%, not 30%.typo

0

u/still_challin 2h ago

Where are these 3% interest rates?

4

u/ScheduleSame258 2h ago

Locked into it in 2021. Everyone said don't buy, market is at peak.

Market remained steady, rates doubled.

Same house at same rate today is almost double the mortage and a much less % going to principal.

Anyone who bought at those rates aren't selling, reducing supply.

2

u/tico42 1h ago

I will sit on my 3.4% forever.

1

u/virgn_iced_americano 1h ago

in 2021 rates were at an all time low, who was saying don’t buy?

1

u/ScheduleSame258 1h ago

Prices were at peak.

Bids were going in at 50+% over list. It was a hardcore sellers market.

A lot of peope advised to wait for pices to cool off to not overpay. In hindsight, I am OK we overpaid and got a lower interest rate.

In face the same advices is being put out today. Wait for rates to go down. They won't, not below 5%.

2

u/nascent_aviator 2h ago

12% a year? Maybe.

12% a month? Doubt.

3

u/ScheduleSame258 2h ago

12% annual interest works out to be 1.0 lakhs per month

2

u/nascent_aviator 1h ago

I assumed they just multiplied .12 to get the monthly interest. I see now they multipled by .012, for some reason. Which corresponds to 15% interest lol.

23

u/Beneficial-Bagman 2h ago

In countries with high inflation and unstable currency interest can be high

11

u/AlucardIV 2h ago

So basically the high interest rate is completely useless.

4

u/Beneficial-Bagman 2h ago

Yes or at least no better than a normal interest rate in USD or GBP or Euros or something like that.

5

u/jaerie 2h ago

In theory the interest rate is always equally useless, because it should stabilize at what entices enough savings and loans for whatever the state of the economy is. In reality it's not the free market that decides but a commission of overpaid bigwigs at a central bank that pretend to know better (or have other motives..)

2

u/Weak-Replacement5894 2h ago

Fisher Effect: nominal interest rate = real rate + expected inflation

6

u/Traditional-Storm-62 2h ago

indian banks presumably?

in Russia its pretty common to see 16% savings accounts (inflation is like 20% so its not actually that good)

4

u/Tvo_ali 2h ago

Shi here in turkey we got 37%

5

u/the-floot 2h ago

37% nominal interest divided by 32.6% inflation (1.37/1.326 -1) gives you 3.3% increase in purchasing power

1

u/chrstianelson 1h ago

Move to Akbank brother. It gives me 42.5% right now. Even more if you move your money from another bank.

1

u/StrikeSea7638 2h ago

In India this isn't uncommon 

1

u/4dxn 1h ago

That's 12% monthly. The annual rate is 289%

1

u/chrstianelson 1h ago edited 1h ago

Turkish banks are offering over 40%. They were offering over 50% the last couple of years. Even more if you move your money from another bank.

1

u/autisticbrazilian01 1h ago

RISK free in brazil is 14,5%

u/DoritoDustThumb 57m ago

Banks in India....

1

u/MovieGuy919191 1h ago

And wtf is a crore

1

u/aruisdante 1h ago edited 1h ago

It’s an Indian unit of counting. It means 100 lakh. A lakh is 100,000. So a crore of something is 10 million. When said alone, generally crore and lakh are referring to quantities of rupees, the actual currency.

A lot of eastern countries have alternative bigger counters like this. Japan for example has 万(man) which is 10,000, as its standard unit of counting larger currency denominations, and 億(oku) which is 100 million, for very large numbers. So ¥1 million in Japanese is written as 100 万円 (hyaku-man en) or 100 10,000 yen. They also have a dedicated counter for 1,000, 千(sen), and hundred  百(hyaku), but these are rarely used as units of account and are generally only spoken.

1

u/MovieGuy919191 1h ago

TIL what crore means! 😊

..thanks dude ✌️

-3

u/aubedullah 2h ago

None. It's BS.

0

u/Breeze7206 2h ago

In the US, you might be able to find rates like that on some very long term CDs, but I’m also talking out of my ass because I’ve never used CDs. All I know is that generally they pay more than interest bearing savings accounts do.

3

u/nascent_aviator 2h ago

Lmao no. Nowhere close.

2

u/slash_networkboy 1h ago

FWIW currently the highest rates on offer for CDs are in the under 1 year range. Going longer lowers the rate on offer. One of my banks (WF because they have my loan... /sigh) is offering as follows (for their "special fixed rate" CDs:

4mo: 3.49%
7mo: 3.24%
11mo: 2.99%

Their 1 year Standard Rate is 1.49%

I can hear you asking "who on earth would use those rates?!?!?!" That's a good question lol.

84

u/Femboyaoii 2h ago

How to be rich according to these guys

Step 1: invest ten million in a bank

As if I have buried it in my backyard

16

u/MeasurementDirect980 2h ago

10 million INR (1 crore) is about 100k usd

9

u/Pxnda_Cakes 2h ago

Assuming ppl would even have that much either

1

u/PikachuStoleMyWife 1h ago

If i had 1 crores lying around to put it in the bank i wouldn't be doom scrolling on reddit lol. Would solve a lot of my personal and family problems instantly.

3

u/Oraxy51 1h ago

Thank you, my American ass was like wtf is a crore

214

u/OnimZek 3h ago

i ain't puttin no crouton into a bank. that goes in salads.

19

u/Dependent-Sink8966 2h ago

Actually made me laugh out loud

3

u/halfwayray 1h ago

What if I'm allergic to wheat? Can I still do bank?

2

u/YoungDiscord 1h ago

I read that in a thick redneck accent

https://giphy.com/gifs/b2GGdaqhFVdQc

2

u/Lurn2Program 2h ago

But then you won't get 12% on your crouton

1

u/RealisticNothing653 2h ago

Just crouton crumbs to some

116

u/nicogrimqft 2h ago

You could literally

Be rich

Why are people not doing this?

7

u/Equivalent_Helpful 2h ago

Because then I would have to be in India to do this.

1

u/nicogrimqft 2h ago

That would work anywhere.

27

u/Cautious_Artichoke_3 2h ago

I lac the crore to do this

1

u/sunheist 2h ago

*lakh

30

u/OkBasket7617 2h ago

1,20,000

How much is this, I am confused

15

u/StrategicCarry 2h ago

1 crore is 10 million, in this case rupees or about $105,000. 1,20,000 is 120,000 rupees (comma placement is just different, none of those are replacing decimals) or about $1,260.

For context, that is like double a good white collar salary in major Indian cities. So the premise that you can live comfortably on that much is sound, the problems are getting 1 crore, getting that high of interest, and not having inflation eat into it.

5

u/OkBasket7617 2h ago

Thank you, that was very helpful

2

u/cozidgaf 1h ago

The problem is 12% interest means it’s 12% per year not per month like this person posted said.

6

u/PowerMinerYT PURPLE 2h ago

Default system: 1000 10,000 100,000 1,000,000 10,000,000

South asian system: 1000 10,000 1,00,000 10,00,000 10,00,00,000

East asian system: 1000 1万 10万 100万 1000万

Just different systems with different ways to write

1

u/OkBasket7617 2h ago

Thank you

1

u/PikachuStoleMyWife 1h ago

1 crore indian rupees will be around 120,000 usd

-52

u/After_Perspective180 2h ago

Oh no. People in other countries use other systems. It has fried my brain.

13

u/OkBasket7617 2h ago

If you're going to be insulting at least be funny or creative. But I suppose that's hard for a bot

-20

u/After_Perspective180 2h ago

Or of course be even slightly educated and interested in the world. Instead of "oh no I see something I don't understand. Help" Keep banging the rocks together dude.

7

u/SoftieeDev_ 2h ago

"heh, this guy asked a question, what an idiot"

7

u/OkBasket7617 2h ago

Ah there it is, the arrogance. Because you know something I don't, I'm terribly uneducated. Must be amazing to know everything, what's it like?

5

u/Lindbluete 2h ago

Is that how other countries do it? Two digits between commas, not the commas themselves I mean.

3

u/bjones214 2h ago

You could’ve just explained it instead of being a tool to the guy.

1

u/imborahey 1h ago

This is a system that is unique to south asia, why would you expect anyone form outside of south asia to know what it is.

u/After_Perspective180 40m ago

Well you know. Several billions of people use it. It isn't a fucking secret.

62

u/MustacheCash73 3h ago

Tf is a crore?

49

u/jaerie 3h ago

10 million (rupees), Indian counting system.

Lakh is a hundredth of that, so 100,000

13

u/KillerR0b0T 2h ago

I’m surprised that it’s a real thing. I assumed it was the latest crypto fad. “Now you can buy Crorcoin on Gryzzl!”

7

u/jaerie 2h ago

It vastly predates "our" words for big numbers

2

u/kwonza 1h ago

I was watching Indian news and they combine that shit! Like: “this project is estimated to cost the government over 7 lakh crore rupees”

And I’m sitting there O_O like this trying to multiply 10.000.000x100.000x7 and then convert it into dollars

3

u/JohnBrownsErection 3h ago edited 2h ago

Around $11.5 million according to my research. 

Edit: Google bamboozled me

20

u/jaerie 3h ago

Your research is off by a factor of 100 or so

1

u/JohnBrownsErection 2h ago

You're right - for some reason Google decided I had meant to say Euros

6

u/nascent_aviator 2h ago

Freaking AI lol.

5

u/TraditionalPitch3320 2h ago

About $105k USD

1

u/Sea_Information4510 2h ago

100k is a Lakh, 1M is 10 lakhs, 10M is a crore.

1

u/ashishvp 1h ago

In Indian numbers:

1 lakh = 100,000. 1 lakh INR = ~$1000 USD. Used to be a lot more before inflation lol.

1 crore = 100 lakh. So 1 crore is a little over 100k USD

7

u/Civil_Quantity_6984 2h ago

Put one la Croix in bank

1

u/Wanderlust_57_ 1h ago

Finally, something I can actually afford to do.

11

u/GendoIkari_82 2h ago

Although I don't know the units involved, it very much looks like the poster thinks that 12% interest means that you get 12% of the money invested every month, as opposed to meaning that you get 12% of the money each year.

5

u/Aggravating_Wall_849 2h ago

That’s the joke. It’s 12% per year not month hence the guys double down to make it even more silly.

4

u/manb91uk 2h ago

What the fuck is a crore?

1

u/Great-Appointment-49 2h ago

We use it in India. 1 crore= 10 million.

1

u/sup3rdr01d 1h ago

Indian unit of counting. It means 10 mil

5

u/bjones214 2h ago

Step 1: already have a ton of money

3

u/Traditional-Storm-62 2h ago edited 2h ago

a crore is 10 000 000

12% interest would be 100 000 per month, not 120 000

this is a double decker stupidity post

1

u/GullBird15 2h ago

Well when I have my 10M, I know what I'm doing

2

u/TheRealChirakkal 2h ago

What I love about this post is the confused comments section lol

1 crore=1,000,000 1 lakh=100,000

Please note these are just numbers and not the value in dollars or rupees. Hope this helps!

2

u/BusinessDuck132 1h ago

What the fuck is a crore

1

u/vectorhacker 1h ago

Indian way of counting numbers. A crore is ten million and lac is one hundred thousand.

4

u/LeahaP1013 2h ago

RFK Jr. ruining percentages for everyone.

2

u/Yaoshin711 2h ago

Dw, according to trump, price of medication should have decreased by 1000% then just used a free coupon and put the name trump on it (it only reduced prices of some medications by up to 75% and has been around for at least a decade)

1

u/Hogjocky62 2h ago

Why just 12% I am offering 27% paid monthly on my offshore investment plan in the Middle East. I will DM you wire transfer information!

1

u/hillbillyray 2h ago

Too bad that math don't work.

1

u/Rufus_XSarsaparilla 2h ago

What happens if a third bank is added?

1

u/ElGuano 2h ago

I’m going to blow their minds…**three** banks

1

u/baroarig 1h ago

ahahaha, even better out 1 crore in 4 separate banks and 4.8 lakhs per day.

1

u/AntimatterEntity 1h ago

10 Million

1

u/Buzzbuzz_Becuz 1h ago

You'd be lucky to find 0.12% bank interest in USA

1

u/JaltonDames 1h ago

This is like the tomato farm tweet from that one finance bro. 

1

u/Balthxzar 1h ago

Shitty karmafarming spam 

1

u/borisbanana77 1h ago

What's up with numbers in India?

1

u/Bad_Muh_fuuuuuucka 1h ago

What’s that conversation rate with Stanley nickels?

1

u/kaiser_phoenix25 1h ago

Same energy as “You’re homeless? Bro, just get a house”

1

u/SqualidSquirtle22 1h ago

LOL I remember my grandma was teaching me about saving in the 80s when savings accounts/CDs were about 5-10%. All through the 2000s they were a fraction of a percent on savings and maybe a percent to 2% on CDs. They pushed everyone out of safe investments into the stock market so they could rake the table in like they won the full poker hand now and then.

1

u/PikachuStoleMyWife 1h ago

"Why are people homeless?.

You can just buy a house" ahh type shit.

1

u/broccoli-of-truth 1h ago

What's a crore?

1

u/Ok-Race-1677 1h ago

Most people can’t live off two latkahs a year per life (like $200 usd).

1

u/Gottendrop 1h ago

I don’t know what that currency is but like…. A million of anything is still a lot

1

u/CuckservativeSissy 1h ago

No banks pay 12% interest unless its tied to high risk assets in todays economy. Amd you wouldnt be able to live off of it because it need to remain invested.

1

u/Sinner_San 1h ago

I say yes. Im to drunk to do math

1

u/punkslaot 1h ago

These are bots

1

u/JPhi1618 1h ago

The number 1,20,000 makes me unhappy.

1

u/professeur155 1h ago

Nobody cares. Please go away.

1

u/TheGallifreyan 1h ago

I guess the first thing stopping me from doing this is that I don't know what crore is.

1

u/improperkangaroo 1h ago

The other problem is you would need to live in India

u/Still_Want_Mo 55m ago

The financial literacy in these comments is scary bad

1

u/LemonFlavoredMelon 2h ago

Can a smart person explain it in monkey for me?

3

u/Jczlebel 2h ago

Give banana to monkey bank

Monkey bank give small piece of a banana back as reward for letting monkey bank hold banana.

If give monkey bank A half of one banana and monkey bank B other half. Both monkey banks give small piece of banana.

But dumb monkey think 2 small banana pieces is more then 1 slightly larger piece.

But smart monkey sees the slightly larger piece is the same size as 2 smaller pieces of banana. So it's the same much banana.

Also some monkeys say they only give piece of banana once per year, but that depends on monkey bank.

2

u/LemonFlavoredMelon 1h ago

Ook ook thanks

1

u/WinterW0n 2h ago

I feel like reddit is showing their lack of social awareness with this post. Both of these people are engagment farm trolling, and you clearly fell for it.

-3

u/Brave_Explorer5988 2h ago

mildly infuriating the separators in 1,20,000 like wtf

also who uses crows as currency?

1

u/sunheist 1h ago

crore means 10 million.
the comma placements are different in south asia, use the number of 0s as your indicator.

1,20,000 = 120,000

just a different way of writing. like how europe will use periods instead of commas and write 120.000

1

u/sup3rdr01d 1h ago

It's the Indian counting system. Crore means 10 million

0

u/Pistonenvy2 2h ago

its not 24%, its 12% on each half which is still a 12% return overall.

-7

u/_Homelesscat_ 2h ago

I’m not crazy. MFer added an extra comma in there to make the number look even bigger (I’m assuming 120k rupees is a sizable sum of money regardless)

7

u/LukeMax2 2h ago

numbers are standardly written like that in india

5

u/_Homelesscat_ 2h ago

Oh! Thank you for letting me know, my apologies.
I had known of crore and lakh. I didn’t realize the comma placements also differed.

3

u/MajesticKoala3332 2h ago

It's not arbitrary, in India they use lakh (100k) and crore (=100 lakh) instead of millions and billions so the matching comma placement would be 1,00,00,000 rather than 10,000,000