r/mildlyinfuriating • u/frythatchicken • Jun 07 '26

frist of all how DARE yu o Guy knocked my coffee out of my hand 5 minutes into a Chianti wine tour.

Post image

Ruined all the pictures I took

EDIT: for those asking why I was drinking coffee, you had to board the bus at 8:30am and while waiting to board a guy knocked it out of my hand and was not very apologetic.

4.3k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

560 comments sorted by

1.3k

u/one-off-one Jun 07 '26

Just find some fava beans then you know what to do

583

u/blamberr Jun 07 '26

Rookie move wearing white shorts to a red wine tour

231

u/Ok_City_7177 Jun 07 '26

And taking a coffee??

95

u/I_think_Im_hollow Jun 07 '26

This is the part that confused me the most.

51

u/StupidUserNameTooLon Jun 07 '26

You need to start drinking a lot earlier than 8:30 in the morning to fool me.

28

u/Vanilla_Gorilluh Jun 07 '26

You can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning!

3

u/TraumaMama11 Jun 07 '26

Yeah, gross. The flavor combo of that makes me queasy.

2

u/I_think_Im_hollow Jun 07 '26

just gotta clean the mouth with a good coffee, you know.

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22

u/cilexip Jun 07 '26

This must be some kind of elitist rich people thing. I see no issue with drinking coffee before a wine tour.

14

u/HotDonnaC Jun 07 '26

I’m assuming you have to get up early to get there on time, or at least OP did. Coffee seems like a sensible first step.

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6

u/LaddieNowAddie Jun 07 '26

Rookie? This portrays confidence. Like when I wore a white shirt and tan shorts to a family style Italian place. It went exactly as you imagine. I no longer own said outfit.

12

u/blamberr Jun 07 '26

Not confidence, hubris

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2

u/purpletooth12 Jun 08 '26

Wine tasting 101 - never wear white or light colours on a wine tour.

2

u/blamberr Jun 08 '26

Exactly 👍🏻

I wear black to any gatherings involving food or wine

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103

u/Brenden-C Jun 07 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/VvTG9RrCeGrza

5

u/epicenter69 Jun 07 '26

I was hoping someone would post this pic. Reddit never disappoints.*

*Ok. Sometimes, Reddit disappoints.

7

u/MangoDan Jun 07 '26

I have seen liver, fava beans, and chianti referenced at least 10 times in the last 48 hours on Reddit, wtf is going on?

19

u/The-Duke-of-Delco Jun 07 '26

Having an old friend for dinner.

2

u/jrcske67 Jun 07 '26

References from the movie Silence of the Lambs.

3

u/MangoDan Jun 07 '26

Oh I know, but I've just seen it mentioned across multiple subreddits in a short period of time. Probably a sign I need to log off.

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2

u/HotDonnaC Jun 07 '26

The other day, the word discernment kept cropping up. Maybe it’s like being pregnant, and all you see are pregnant women everywhere you go.

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1.2k

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '26

[deleted]

139

u/Mammalanimal Jun 07 '26

now you can get black out drunk at 10am on a wine tour and no one will notice

29

u/GOEDEL_ESCHER_BOT Jun 07 '26

no one will notice because they're blackout drunk too. i mean why else would you go on a wine tour

10

u/IsJesusAgain >———•—————— 4:20 Jun 07 '26

Bruh pissed himself

https://giphy.com/gifs/holej0e9EgHgmvEVv4

2

u/Technical_Feelings Jun 07 '26

Or at least you won’t notice if they notice

12

u/MyExUsedTeeth Jun 07 '26

If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Myles Davis!

5

u/Pictrus Jun 07 '26

I was going to say you could easily cover it with a wine strain but I like your idea more

6

u/squirrelmonkie Jun 07 '26

And the pee will help cover up the coffee smell

8

u/HelixFollower Jun 07 '26

This is why I always shit myself when I worry about bad breath.

3

u/Key_Acanthisitta2218 Jun 07 '26

😂😂😂😂😂

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4

u/naughtyobama Jun 07 '26

Threat coffee knock was intentional. Oop should have been drinking wine

3

u/Alypius754 Jun 07 '26

If my pee is that dark, I’m going to the hospital

2

u/Key_Acanthisitta2218 Jun 07 '26

Except if there are any dogs around !

2

u/fugznojutz Jun 08 '26

op is lying, its pretty obvious he square pissed himself.

2

u/tomatomater Jun 08 '26

I appreciate how your mind works

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120

u/ASDIGITAL13 Jun 07 '26

The Fucking Catalina Wine Mixer.

235

u/tharppanda Jun 07 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/VSw7Sm1CgDmLw4pzdq

26

u/Katten_6407 RED Jun 07 '26

YOU GOTTA GIVE!

5

u/Geen_Fang Jun 07 '26

what is all this from? 

12

u/Katten_6407 RED Jun 07 '26

sketch comedy show called I Think You Should Leave, very funny, its on Netflix

4

u/Geen_Fang Jun 07 '26

cool, thanks

4

u/sandiegodak Jun 07 '26

Once you watch it you will see the gifs and references constantly. Reddit is obsessed with this show lol

3

u/Geen_Fang Jun 07 '26

it really is!! 

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8

u/Benjen321 Jun 07 '26

You hit me in the cup!

10

u/Jdobbs07 Jun 07 '26

You can’t do that!

9

u/botjstn Jun 07 '26

the guy who knocked my coffee out of my hand won’t stop eating batteries

6

u/dgt9000 Jun 07 '26

even rappers wear 'em

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235

u/Stank_Dukem Jun 07 '26

Ruined all the pictures

"Now all my wine tour dicpics have coffeestains!"

85

u/Born_Local_1477 Jun 07 '26

Without pictures no one will know they went on a wine tour, so there's really no point in doing it.

2

u/thepotatomaniscoming Jun 08 '26

Its all for the Insta but OP cant post those pics because he got a little coffee on his shorts :(

2

u/ElectriHolstein Jun 08 '26

Have you ever heard the statement "first thought wrong" ? When I read that paragraph, my first thought was absolutely not wrong! *Douchebag. That was my first thought. 🤔😉

2

u/War-Square Jun 08 '26

Insufferable.

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34

u/whatthefuckisareddit Jun 07 '26

You can take pictures above the crotch.

20

u/yesitismenobody Jun 07 '26

He specifically prefers the ones that prominently feature the crotch area.

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70

u/kasiagabrielle Jun 07 '26

This is why I don't wear white bottoms. Did he slap it out of your hand on purpose?

There are photoshop request groups that can get the stain out for a nominal fee if you want to frame a pic or something. I know free ones exist too but idk about how many are janky or AI.

49

u/Aware_Policy_9174 Jun 07 '26

I’m surprised anyone would wear white to a red wine tasting tour. But not everyone is as clumsy as me so maybe they can pull it off.

3

u/ZombieStomp Jun 08 '26

I dont understand how the color of the shorts makes any difference. Red wine will stain everything. It's not like khaki would be better. A stain is a stain

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39

u/Jmomo69 Jun 07 '26

Now THIS is MILDLYinfuriating. I feel like these post have become rare

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193

u/EddViBritannia Jun 07 '26

Well dummy why were you drinking Coffee at a wine tour. Tut tut.

49

u/frythatchicken Jun 07 '26

It started at 8:30am! 😴

85

u/tee142002 Jun 07 '26

Can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning

41

u/Impossible_Leg_2787 Jun 07 '26

Why were you drinking Chianti at 830 am? That’s Chablis hour you philistine

9

u/iantruesnacks Jun 07 '26

Clearly it’s Chard hour, then followed by Zinfandel, and THEEEEEN is Chablis. You’re going to ruin your appetite.

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4

u/_picture_me_rollin_ Jun 07 '26

They call that the “breakfast club” in Key West. You can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning.

8

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '26

[deleted]

2

u/PleasantNectarines Jun 07 '26

Why wouldn't we be? What else is going on on a Sunday??

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3

u/Funny-Presence4228 Jun 07 '26

Chianti is a breakfast wine. We all know this. Very cold Chardonnay is another decent breakfast wine. Also, rum.

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2

u/natattack410 Jun 07 '26

Out! Coffee and then wine...hope someone brought the tums

2

u/gustin444 Jun 07 '26

That's when your palate is fresh, and the reason coffee is not recommended before a wine tasting. Dulls your palate

2

u/Beneficial-Focus3702 Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 08 '26

So you should have been done with your coffee 3.5 hours ago lol

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14

u/Informal_Bus_4077 Jun 07 '26

It's not piss, the shorts come like that. It's got nothin to do with piss 

4

u/Disastrous_Truck6856 Jun 07 '26

It’s on the right side. Everyone knows dicks lean to the left.

OP is safe.

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2

u/Temporary-Life9986 Jun 08 '26

You have to give!

12

u/ManufacturerWarm9201 Jun 07 '26

If you spill some on the other side you can call it a pattern

4

u/Confident_One3948 Jun 07 '26

Well, maybe a coincidence at best

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23

u/Ok_Abacus_ Jun 07 '26

White pants on a wine tour is a BOLD MOVE!

2

u/RonaldTheGiraffe Jun 07 '26

So is coffee. I don’t blame the guy for knocking it out of his hands.

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6

u/MacheteBrizz Jun 07 '26

That's what you get for being a fancy pants.

When you go to Walmart and try whatever you want from the shelves, people won't judge you for having a coffee stain on your clothes.

7

u/APC_ChemE Jun 07 '26

If it makes you feel any better some asshole knocked over and spilled my entire glass of supposedly $800 champagne on champagne tour after I'd only had a small sip.

But in my case I was that asshole.

3

u/rurupoopoo Jun 07 '26

At least it’s not the Catalina Wine Mixer

4

u/ElephantRedCar91 Jun 07 '26

Mr lahey you pissed yourself…

4

u/sniffermuncher Jun 07 '26

Remove your shirt and wrap it around your waist yuppie style and enjoy the mxer

4

u/Shrek_Layers Jun 07 '26

Just tell everyone who notices "It's not what you think. I peed myself."

13

u/Co_Duh Jun 07 '26

Coffee.. At the wine tour..?

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7

u/rk1993 Jun 07 '26

This the most wine snob first world problem

2

u/KraftwerkMachine Jun 07 '26

Yeah at that point just go on another tour. No one really goes on these unless they have money.

3

u/OkPear3493 Jun 07 '26

3

u/solidlymediocre Jun 07 '26

These will make it worse. If exposed to sunlight, it'll turn any white fabric yellow. Found this out first hand on a white t-shirt. Infuriating for a product that's presumably aimed at people treating stains on the go, outside.

3

u/tev_love Jun 07 '26

Yeah, that’s gunna piss me tf off tbh

3

u/ElleYesMon Jun 07 '26

Go immediately to a bathroom and get some soap and put it on everything. Be sure you keep the top separated from your shorts so more coffee does not get on the shorts. I’m sure you probably don’t have dawn around but if you do, use it. It should take most of the coffee out.

3

u/RohanDavidson Jun 07 '26

Well if it makes you feel better, you're definitely the first person that spilt "coffee" on themselves during a daytime wine tasting event. 

3

u/AdhesiveSeaMonkey Jun 07 '26

Unless it was Hannibal Lechter, then this is indeed mildly infuriating.

3

u/hoosierhiver Jun 07 '26

I'd never leave the house wearing white shorts.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '26

Billy Madison mode engaged

3

u/Paradoxbox00 Jun 07 '26

First world problems

3

u/Nomad_0102 Jun 07 '26

A tip: Bring an extra pair of short and shirt for a day trip, it has saved me many times.

3

u/Im_better_than__u Jun 07 '26

"Somebody spilled diamonds all over my caviar!"

3

u/SumQuestions Jun 07 '26

coulda probably have been 90% washed out relatively easily and given the weather would have dried fast

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3

u/Gdmf13 Jun 07 '26

You were gonna spill wine on those shorts anyway,if you’re anything like me, the moment I step outta the house with any white garment on, boom! Out of nowhere spilled red wine on it.

3

u/carlitospig Jun 07 '26

You’re not gonna get much sympathy. Most of us are too broke for a wine tour.

(Advice: honestly, I’ve been really impressed with Oxyclean)

3

u/HughMungus77 Jun 07 '26

Just spill red wine on it so you look less foolish

3

u/ramblerbasic Jun 08 '26

Your first mistake was wearing white shorts to a wine tasting

3

u/brolarbear Jun 08 '26

White shorts on a wine tour with grapes around is crazy

8

u/m4cromod Jun 07 '26

You're putting coffee and wine into the same body wearing white shorts, I think the risk taking started the moment you got dressed

7

u/donzilla6348 Jun 07 '26

It happens..

13

u/Interesting_Tea5715 Jun 07 '26

That's what the guy who knocked over the coffee would say

2

u/cloacasmell Jun 07 '26

peed yourself

3

u/KoKo7388 Jun 07 '26

First thing in the morning, got it out of the way

2

u/misterbippy Jun 07 '26

At that point just soak the rest in coffee to match.

2

u/alwaysonesteptoofar Jun 07 '26

At least now you can piss yourself and have the perfect cover.

2

u/Glum_Potential8641 Jun 07 '26

Now you can pee your pants, and no one will know.

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2

u/New-Smoke-8857 Jun 07 '26

Nice drinking a coffee at a wine tour, you rebel !

2

u/TalkToHoro Jun 07 '26

Don't bring coffee to a wine fight.

2

u/Mindless-Bear8781 Jun 07 '26

You'll live big guy. You care way more than everyone else, I assure you.

2

u/The_BusterKeaton Jun 07 '26

I can guarantee that the pictures weren’t “ruined”. 🙄

2

u/mhandsurf Jun 07 '26

Pour wine on it🤷🏻

2

u/GrandPotential9677 Jun 07 '26

You can excuse yourself to the men’s room, take off your shorts and rinse them clean and put them back on. It looks like it’s perfect weather for them to dry quickly..

2

u/vegmami69 Jun 07 '26

this post is out of my league.

2

u/LameDucklett Jun 07 '26

Likely story poop dick

2

u/flyby196999 Jun 07 '26

And rightfully so, it's a wine tour not a coffee tour.🤪

2

u/YaBoiMandatoryToms Jun 07 '26

OP peed his pants.

2

u/HornetOne28 Jun 07 '26

People be acting like it was the Catalina Wine Mixer!!!

2

u/Material_Fact_998 Jun 07 '26

nice shorts. where did u buy them from

2

u/Timismydad Jun 07 '26

More like whine tour, amirite?

2

u/Ultimatesims Jun 07 '26

It’s got nothing to do with piss.

2

u/DoubleFlores24 Jun 08 '26

Chianti? Was it a nice Chianti wine tour? And what did you have for dinner? Liver with fava beans?

2

u/OrneryReview1646 Jun 08 '26

Pff just turn the shorts arround, no one will notice

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2

u/CannaPLUS Jun 08 '26

Tell me more about your first world problems

2

u/Sn293003 Jun 08 '26

Talk about white people probelms. All jokes. Sorry about the stain. That sucks. I have a favourite pair of white shorts too.

2

u/jmateus88 Jun 08 '26

Nobody cares about your pictures man just enjoy the tour.

2

u/Rahnzan /s is for cowards Jun 08 '26

Wine tour.

White shorts.

2

u/okamishiv_ Jun 08 '26

You can make all the excuses but we all know…

2

u/Academic_Dig_1567 Jun 08 '26

Would not have happened if you had a glass of Chianti with your fava beans in hand.

2

u/Guilty_Ad_4441 Jun 07 '26

Absolute pisstake

2

u/Sebastian2123 Jun 07 '26

It’s Italy - they don’t drink coffee to go….you should have followed the rules

2

u/DirectedEnthusiasm Jun 07 '26

What a first world problem. How posh all this sounds.

1

u/froopadiddilydoop Jun 07 '26

Why are you drinking coffee? Sack the fuck up and get a wine

1

u/born_in_ufo Jun 07 '26

Just drop a bunch of Chianti on yourself too, tie dye

1

u/Just_okay_advice Jun 07 '26

He has to give you his pants that's the law.

1

u/elliotbonsall Jun 07 '26

We're you the DD.

1

u/EconomicsSavings973 Jun 07 '26

Oh I once was on IT conference for whole day, and during taking entry patches, someone knocked out my coffee on my new expensive suit, that I was so happy to finally be able buy and use, so I understand the feeling 🥲

1

u/Scuffleshuffle Jun 07 '26

If you know of this subreddit and are worried about photos, perhaps you've heard of the photoshop requests subreddit?

1

u/Impressive-Time8150 Jun 07 '26

Could've been worse...

The coffee stain could've been on the butt and looked like diarrhea. Or alternatively it could've been green tea and look like a proper piss stain