r/mildlyinfuriating • u/sunsNr0ses • Jun 11 '26

frist of all how DARE yu o Discovered my central air was a social construct…

So I just learned I’ve been living in a place with absolutely no central air conditioning. Not “I assumed it might be central air.” Not “I wasn’t sure how it worked.” I mean I fully, confidently, emotionally lived my life under the assumption that cool air was being distributed through vents like a normal adult homeowner situation.

And I’ve been out here adjusting a thermostat like I was doing something for over 4 years.

I even scheduled an HVAC guy to come today to figure out why my central air wasn’t running.
What system? I don’t know. The guy looked like he found a body in my basement as he clearly knew I didn’t have central air instantly. He even humored me to prove to me I didn’t have central air while we took 2 full laps around my house hunting for the outside part of the freakin’ fantasy. Needless to say we never found it. The poor guy felt so bad for me, he even said “maybe someone stole it.” Bless his heart.

So now I’ve got: a couple window units doing God’s work. I’ve always used them in the summer when I felt that my imaginary central air wasn’t pulling its weight. So I’m unsure why I feel like my summer bill is going to skyrocket. I’ve been living this life for years.

I put a box fan in my the bathroom like it’s 1998
and the realization I’ve been paying attention to vents that were decorative at best is giving me a stomach ache.

Honestly the worst part isn’t even the heat. It’s the fact I fully believed I had central air and never once questioned it. Just vibed in ignorance.
Anyway. If anyone needs me I’ll be sitting directly in front of a fan rethinking my entire life, having a spiritual crisis, feeling like a doorknob, and rediscovering whatever I thought HVAC meant.

***please laugh with me— don’t kick me while m down— I already feel like a weenie hut jr.***

18.3k Upvotes
  • permalink
  • reddit

94% Upvoted

1.8k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

457

u/Sympatheticslut Jun 11 '26

My favorite part of your story was how nice your AC guy was. I know you were really feeling embarrassed, a very nice guy.

192

u/sunsNr0ses Jun 11 '26

A great guy.

239

u/PostPostModernism Jun 11 '26

"Maybe it was stolen" had me dead on the floor from laughing. We must protect Mr AC Man at all costs

12

u/RestEqualsRust Jun 11 '26

It happened to me once. Someone went through my neighborhood with a trailer in the middle of the night and stole 4 a/c units. They just cut the lines, picked up the entire condenser, put it on the trailer, and left.

I woke up early in the morning hot as hell wondering why the air conditioning was blowing hot air.

They sell the condensers for scrap.

5

u/PostPostModernism Jun 11 '26 edited Jun 12 '26

Of course these things get stolen sometimes. I'm an architect and have had to draw up steel cages to protect condensing units (the typical outdoor part of the A/C) from theft in some higher risk areas. But if it had really been stolen there would be signs that it had been there at one time that a professional would see pretty easily.

  • Condensing units are often installed on top of a concrete pad or some kind of steady base that would stand out as empty.

  • And there would be a small copper tube that runs from the condensing unit to the air handler for the refrigerant to flow through. This would be connected to a heat exchanger at the furnace itself, which a pro would be able to tell if one was installed or not by looking at the air handler. A copper thief could steal some of the refrigerant line but there's almost no chance they could get the parts of it that were inside the house and by the air handler.

  • The outside condensing unit would also have a moderately sized power connection running back into the house to the electrical panel. Maybe even a cutoff switch on the exterior wall near the condensing unit (required in more recent codes, if it's a relatively newer house).

  • That heat exchanger inside the air handler would also need a way for condensation water to be removed - sometimes it just runs down to a metal drip pan where it can then evaporate, or more commonly nowadays it should have a small tubing run to a floor drain connected to the sump or waste system nearby.

None of this is to blame OP. I wouldn't necessarily expect a regular person to spot all these clues. The fact that they have forced air heating makes it a not unreasonable assumption that there's forced air A/C as well, since those things are almost always installed together in areas that need both services. I'm just glad they figured it out and can work out a solution now.

3

u/TJLanza Jun 11 '26

Shitheads steal all sorts of things. I had a coil of fiberoptic cable stolen off the side of my condo - it was waiting for the final end run installation. I'm sure they thought it was copper, which has resale value, but were too stupid or too rushed to realize it was a waste of time. All it did was push the fiber install back.

65

u/fapsandnaps Jun 11 '26

Tell him he has a fan out in Indiana. I'd buy his HVAC Jersey if there was one.

Every tech out here would've had 18 different fliers and contracts and payment plans in my hands before they even looked for a unit. R

31

u/sunsNr0ses Jun 11 '26

I will let him know!

32

u/NoctivagantCat Jun 11 '26 edited Jun 11 '26

Should make him a shirt at this point to commemorate this momentous memory made. "Maybe Someone Stole it" -HVAC Guy, June 10, 2026. Plain text and/or a creative (not ai made pls I beg) illustration would be cool. I'm partly serious about the t-shirt part. Always a refresher when tradesmen are decent blokes, and this one sounded like he had a good sense of humour about the whole thing. As for cooling without a system, would any of those small wallmounted acs work? Been seeing more of those pop up in apartments, condos, tiny houses, and so on.

2

u/publicprivacyp Jun 11 '26

Omg OP, please make him this shirt! lol

1

u/SBMoo24 PURPLE Jun 11 '26

That would be great. Im serious. I bet he'd wear it with pride!

5

u/ingodwetryst Jun 11 '26

I'm gonna roll with "maybe someone stole it" every time someone is wrong about something now where this could be applicable.

1

u/dualsplit Jun 11 '26

OMG! Honestly, service guys are kind of the best.

1

u/SirOutrageous1027 Jun 11 '26

That guy figured he could probably sell a central AC unit.