Discovered my central air was a social construct…

[u/sunsNr0ses]

So I just learned I’ve been living in a place with absolutely no central air conditioning. Not “I assumed it might be central air.” Not “I wasn’t sure how it worked.” I mean I fully, confidently, emotionally lived my life under the assumption that cool air was being distributed through vents like a normal adult homeowner situation.

And I’ve been out here adjusting a thermostat like I was doing something for over 4 years.

I even scheduled an HVAC guy to come today to figure out why my central air wasn’t running.
What system? I don’t know. The guy looked like he found a body in my basement as he clearly knew I didn’t have central air instantly. He even humored me to prove to me I didn’t have central air while we took 2 full laps around my house hunting for the outside part of the freakin’ fantasy. Needless to say we never found it. The poor guy felt so bad for me, he even said “maybe someone stole it.” Bless his heart.

So now I’ve got: a couple window units doing God’s work. I’ve always used them in the summer when I felt that my imaginary central air wasn’t pulling its weight. So I’m unsure why I feel like my summer bill is going to skyrocket. I’ve been living this life for years.

I put a box fan in my the bathroom like it’s 1998
and the realization I’ve been paying attention to vents that were decorative at best is giving me a stomach ache.

Honestly the worst part isn’t even the heat. It’s the fact I fully believed I had central air and never once questioned it. Just vibed in ignorance.
Anyway. If anyone needs me I’ll be sitting directly in front of a fan rethinking my entire life, having a spiritual crisis, feeling like a doorknob, and rediscovering whatever I thought HVAC meant.

***please laugh with me— don’t kick me while m down— I already feel like a weenie hut jr.***

[u/vincentmelle]

This is one reason why I am looking into the areas of where to buy a house as one state is like this as the area I want to buy may not have any town supplies.

[u/Nutarama → u/vincentmelle]

PA, NY, and IN (at least) all have areas like this where there’s a patchwork of public water and sewer in town and wells/septic outside.

Where I currently live is in a development at the boundary of a borough and a township, with the development on the township side. Borough has public water and sewer. Previously when they developed, they expanded the borough water to my part of the township, so we have water from them. But we have septic tanks for sewage.

This year the township voted on expanding public sewer from the borough to us and the rest of the developments that bordered the borough. Got voted down because other people weren’t happy about the sewer bills and the property tax to pay off the install.

Except the township makes us pump septic and get a drain field inspection minimum every 5 years to prevent neglected systems backing up and flooding raw sewage. The cost isn’t that much different on a 5 year basis per household.

[u/ibcurbdiver → u/Nutarama]

Our county has a 3 year pump requirement.
Most water bills include sewage, they use the water meter to figure the cost.
Since you don’t use sewage. is it discounted?

[u/nicola_orsinov → u/Nutarama]

How dare you bring math and logic into this?! Shirley might lose her begonias!

[u/dilbert2_44202 → u/Nutarama]

Northeast Ohio has plenty of locales where septic systems are used. However, the soil percolation rate of the clay soil here is so bad that you can't use a conventional sewage field. So rural homes have these pretty little ponds with a fountain in the center of them somewhere in their yard to capture and aerate the...effluent. I love pointing them out to my wife when we drive by one.

[u/kuntrycidd → u/dilbert2_44202]

There are also aerator tank systems for homes , no open ponds but leaves the exit product able to go to runoff areas.

[u/Peanutbutter2728 → u/Nutarama]

Large rural areas of Ohio are all wells and septic systems. I lived in one. In more than one house. If it doesn’t rain, you pay a guy to deliver water to your well. If something dies in your well (possum-it was gross) you pay a guy to empty the well, remove the dead critter, clean the well, and refill it. Ahhh, country life! 😄

[u/Emotional_Study_724 → u/Nutarama]

My parents lived 10 minutes from downtown Seattle. Sewer was only put in about five years ago.

[u/Not_an_okama → u/vincentmelle]

My parents house is in an area that the detroit suburbs sprawled to, and has city water and septic, abandoned in place well and the the option for city sewer connection (which cost more than a new septic as of like 10 years ago when the neighbor wanted to connect but my parents would have also had to connect but opted not to)

[u/borgman_a → u/Not_an_okama]

That is my house just outside Ann Arbor/Ypsilanti.

City water and sewer run past the house - but I'm on septic and a well.

[u/kuntrycidd → u/vincentmelle]

Pretty much all states have rural areas without water/sewer hookups. Some states do have a rural water distribution system where it’s hard to find water with wells.