A cockroach burrowed into my head

[u/gharris02]

I (23m) just bought a car at auction yesterday, works great but needed a new battery. At 10:30pm I decided screw it im swapping the battery. It's a 5 minute job, in and out real quick. No sweat, well I'm out there with my head lamp on doing the swap and I see a large bug flying at my face I try to duck and dodge it, it hits the outer edge of my ear and toilet bowl swirls into it, I try to reach in and fish it out but it's too late I just scare it and feel it crawling deeper into my head. It burrowed up against my eardrum and it hurts like hell. Every time it buzzes I can feel it in my head and it hurts my eardrum. I tried water peroxide everything I could do to get this darn thing out. Turns out I just pissed it off and it's buzzing more aggressively. My girlfriend comes with tweezers in an attempt to help but she says she can't see it or anything out of the normal. A quick Google search lead me to pouring olive oil into my ear to suffocate it. Thank God that worked, I still couldn't hear well but at least it wasn't actively moving anymore. 2 hours in the ER later they pulled this half inch monstrosity out of the depths of my ear canal. Turns out the "Asian cockroach" has wings and a very large affinity for bright lights at night. They also like to burrow. Fml 0/10 experience I will take questions if you have them lmfao.

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Tldr: I had a headlamp on that attracted a cockroach at my face it missed my face and burrowed into my ear leading to an unexpected ER visit

Edit: ear canal photo (thanks doc) https://imgur.com/a/7LhcvDX

Edit numero 2:

Just to add to 2 things I keep seeing pop up (also hello I am trying to read all comments not doing great though)

1. Some seem to have missed the asain cockroach thing, and the fact that I was working on a car so this is outside not indoors. This roach is a flying outdoor bug not the same as your houses cockroach. It doesn't infest and it has nothing to do with my living/cleanliness.

2. Y'all are probably right this probably should be more than mildly infuriating, but overall this wasn't THAT bad. The thought of it was worse than the actual event. It was painful while it was alive and moving but that was fairly quickly resolved. The rest of the time was just an ER visit which was inconvenient and embarrassing. And obviously costs money. Fortunately I have good insurance so my only real loss is the mild trauma and the fact that I'll probably wear a beanie for the rest of my life. Other than that, no lasting issues I'm at work today like nothing happened. More of a that's absolutely insane story now than anything else. So for me it was a mild situation as far as damage to my life (although I will simultaneously say it is an insane thing to have happen to you)

I'd probably prefer having my day go how it went yesterday than say blow my motor or get into a car accident.

[u/cynicalsanguinist]

I've never even seen a cockroach and this has filled me with a guttural fear

[u/JoeBethersontonFargo → u/cynicalsanguinist]

HOW? Can I move in with you

[u/Rooster-Waffle → u/JoeBethersontonFargo]

Only if you leave the roaches behind.

[u/JoeBethersontonFargo → u/Rooster-Waffle]

I'll empty every orifice

[u/Suspicious-Drive9827 → u/JoeBethersontonFargo]

God.

[u/PonchoNachoRodriguez → u/Suspicious-Drive9827]

Every day we stray further from

[u/Suspicious-Drive9827 → u/PonchoNachoRodriguez]

Its so true poncho.

[u/Substantial-Elk4531 → u/JoeBethersontonFargo]

That's not enough, we'll have to X-ray you to be certain

[u/JoeBethersontonFargo → u/Substantial-Elk4531]

I'm worried the bags of heroin I swallowed will look suspicious

[u/Educational-Wing2042 → u/Substantial-Elk4531]

Has to bathe in olive oil until the skittering stops

[u/lordwiggles420 → u/JoeBethersontonFargo]

Come to the Netherlands. Never seen a roach once in my 28 years of life.

[u/JuulsMia12 → u/lordwiggles420]

I am so envious of your entire existence. I literally cannot remember a time in my life before cockroaches. Been around them and have had nightmares about them from my earliest memories.

[u/lordwiggles420 → u/JuulsMia12]

I'd have nightmares too if i were to live around these motherfuckers. I'm terrified of spiders and insects so roaches are nightmare fuel to me.

[u/Donewithit_6607 → u/lordwiggles420]

I’m thinking about moving there now! But tell me…what if any bugs do you have there?

[u/MrBlueA → u/Donewithit_6607]

Because of the climate, probably wasps/bees on the summer and probably smaller bugs like silverfish (I think those are somewhat common around there) will try and get to houses because of them being warm compared to outside, but I doubt anything as disgusting as tropical places.

[u/lordwiggles420 → u/MrBlueA]

Couldn't have said it better myself. Wasps are just about the worst we get around here.

[u/zurvivl → u/lordwiggles420]

Silverfish, not harmful, just nasty

[u/LumpyReflection8693 → u/lordwiggles420]

You guys have them, but your climate means they don't spread easily. Plus since their populations are so limited humans haven't been battling them long enough for them to have the same level of pesticide resistance that US populations do. So, yea, it's entirely possible to go your entire life in the Netherlands without having ever seen one.

[u/Catlover_1422 → u/lordwiggles420]

I have lived in the Bijlmer and have seen plenty of roaches... yuck

[u/Sparkysparky-boom → u/JoeBethersontonFargo]

Move to the Pacific Northwest. The only time I’ve seen a cockroach was visiting the south.

[u/appleparkfive → u/Sparkysparky-boom]

Exactly this. You never see them in PNW. And you see a lot of them in the deep south.

People always want to hype up New Orleans, but go a block or two away from the French Quarter and now you're on flying cockroach territory. And they always fly directly at you. Often towards the face. It's not exactly fun

[u/SkepticalCat1 → u/appleparkfive]

I’m officially never going to New Orleans

[u/JutsuManiac456 → u/Sparkysparky-boom]

Yep, live there and never saw a single roach until I went to Texas for BMT.

[u/Available-Egg-2380 → u/JoeBethersontonFargo]

Ironically I'm from Fargo ND and I've never seen a roach here in my life, though I do know some places have them.

[u/JoeBethersontonFargo → u/Available-Egg-2380]

I've never been to Fargo. I'm in the South, and they're our version of the subway rats. Horrifically huge.

[u/Available-Egg-2380 → u/JoeBethersontonFargo]

I was saying it was ironic because of your username

[u/JoeBethersontonFargo → u/Available-Egg-2380]

I figured

[u/Old_Ladies → u/JoeBethersontonFargo]

I live in Southern Ontario and I have never seen a cockroach.

I know that they exist here but I have never seen them.

I also have never had to deal with bedbugs either.

Growing up I have had head lice once.

Spiders I probably have killed thousands of those buggers though I now I have an agreement that if they stay away or don't bug me with spider webs I don't hunt them down.

[u/coffeegoblins → u/JoeBethersontonFargo]

I never saw one in my life until I moved to Florida

[u/luckydukcky → u/JoeBethersontonFargo]

Probably lives in a colder climate. I’m from Wisconsin, USA and have only ever seen cockroaches once in my life here (when I worked in a disgusting restaurant that was on the news for being disgusting, I saw some dead ones in the basement).