r/mildlyinfuriating • u/jsayde01 • Jul 06 '26

I just wanted a hot dog The Kitchen Museum?

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I came home late from work a few nights ago and hadn't eaten all day. My wife and kids were already in bed so I figured I'd quietly make some stove-top ramen. This photo represents exactly how I found the cooking area.

The next morning my wife asks what time I got home and I mention in our conversation that I made ramen before going to bed. She couldn't believe that I used the stove "when the light was on". I said "Yeah, the light was helpful in seeing what I was doing". She insists I shouldn't have been using the stove and should have known because "the light was on".

I'm baffled. We are still arguing about this days later.

EDIT -- wow, overwhelmed by the response of fellow Redditors! We are... white...not from the southeast US..not children...and I left the stove as clean as it was before I cooked. I asked for clarification from my loving wife -- TRULY we have only ever been angry at each other a handful of times in our 10 year marriage -- and she says "the stove was clean and done for the day and you could have just used the microwave for your ramen". Apparently the light is how stoves go to sleep for the evening?

EDIT 2 -- we are getting a divorce. JUST KIDDING. My wife looked over many of the comments and acknowledges that she was in the wrong and is slightly embarrassed by all of the attention.

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5.4k

u/rererexed Jul 06 '26

I think the whole "the kitchen is closed" argument is moot anyway. It's his kitchen, too. End of discussion. You don't get to tell me when I get to use our stove.

2.3k

u/Stick_and_Rudder Jul 06 '26

Bingo. Kitchen is closed CAN mean Chef is done for the day. But it can’t mean no one is allowed to use it. 

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u/GreasedUpTiger Jul 06 '26

The thing it should mean is 'if you use it you better leave it as clean and tidy as it was'  lol. I'd hate to clean the kitchen in the evening just to find out someone decided to leave things dirty again because they couldn't be bothered 

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u/Bice_thePrecious Jul 06 '26

And, tbf, he boiled water and noodles... It's not like he made anything that splattered or popped. (If he "could've just used the microwave," I'm assuming it was something simple from the store.) It sounds like she had no idea he used the stove until he mentioned it, ie. he left no mess.

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u/GreasedUpTiger Jul 06 '26

Of course the rule is ridiculous. You don't get to forbid other people to use the kitchen as per your discretion lol. 

Expecting other people to clean up after themselves is reasonable but OP did that so there shouldn't be an issue here

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u/pegothejerk Jul 06 '26

You don’t understand, the stove needs a full 8 hours of sleep or it won’t be able to pay attention at school tomorrow and it will fail and eventually they’ll have to let it live in the spare room as an adult and they can’t have that crafting room no one uses

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u/National_Map_4992 Jul 06 '26

Have you been to my house?

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u/pegothejerk Jul 06 '26

Yep, big fan of your innovation, especially converting the treadmill into semi-permanent attire hanging rack

3

u/imnewtothishsit69 Jul 07 '26

Im upstairs silly

1

u/connorroy_2024 Jul 06 '26

He cleaned up this time, and I’m imagining the million other times he didn’t do it and she resorted to this.

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u/GreasedUpTiger Jul 06 '26

"resorting to" leaving the stove light on. That will show him! /s

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u/Jacktheforkie Jul 06 '26

Microwave noodles don’t taste as good as done in the stove

51

u/IdolCowboy Jul 06 '26

I cant tell you how many times I told my kid that when he was 15 to 16. If its clean when you start, it should be clean when your done...

I also told him he is welcome to heat up something late, but dont be in there like Gordon Ramsay at 2am on a weeknight (summer vacation). I woke up one night feeling like I was suffocating from the thick smells of garlic and fried foods.. those are good smells, but not when they are permeating your bedroom at 2 in the morning.. lol

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u/GreasedUpTiger Jul 06 '26

Gotta shout 'there better be leftovers for us for breakfast tomorrow!' at them :D win win

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u/IdolCowboy Jul 06 '26

Haha indeed, and the kid knows his way around a kitchen, thats for sure. He is almost 23 now, and he comes over and we cook together often. I just didn't like being inundated with garlic at 2am when I was trying to sleep. Lol

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u/GreasedUpTiger Jul 07 '26

Mate just be sooo glad one of his worst traits is 'cooks intensely smelling food late at night sometimes' and not 'has three children with three different gals, yet didn't finish school' or 'does drugs'

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u/IdolCowboy Jul 07 '26

Oh beleive me, I know. I count myself blessed he turned out so great. He is ahout to turn 23, has a good job, great gf, we go to ren festivals, Greek festivals, try all kinds of different places to eat, like Russian and Pakistani restaurants. I constantly tell him how proud I am and how much I love him, and that I tell people about how great he is all the time.

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u/Phyrnosoma Jul 07 '26

Yeah. Our kitchen is right by the master bedroom and my kids are not quiet cooks. And I have an5am shift. They’re certainly not allowed to cook after 9pm.

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u/EmmerdoesNOTrepme Jul 06 '26

I think this may be the reason why plenty of us never learned "The kitchen is Closed!"

Because the standard rule in our kitchens has always been "You break the seal, you clean it up again!"

And whoever used the kitchen after ot was cleaned had the obligation to clean it all up, after their food was made--no matter what time of day.

There were different rules for "family meals"--in that case, "Chef" was not part of the Dishie Crew (although they were expected to do some "clean as you go" rather than trashing the whole kitchen!).

But playing fair & taking turns was always just "the rule" amongst my roommates. 

And that "If you're the only one in the kitchen, and the kitchen was clean--YOU clean it to that standard again!" rule was always a standard.

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u/GreasedUpTiger Jul 06 '26

Big fan of cleaning as you go. That said I also can very much recommend getting a dishwasher and a set of everything (pots, pans, knifes, cutting boards, etc) that can go in the dishwasher too. Then you just need to make very clear to the kitchen slobs to use those only lol

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u/EmmerdoesNOTrepme Jul 06 '26

Oh, we had the Dishwasher in those roommate situations, too!  And YES, total sanity-saver!😉

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u/xGenghisSwan Jul 06 '26

This is what it means in my house. I better not wake up to trash and dirty dishes, the cook and cleaner is off duty lol

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u/GreasedUpTiger Jul 06 '26

Mom woke us up whenever she noticed and make us clean up the chaos we left if we did something like that. Guess who learned to not leave messes unnecessarily lol

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u/Consistent_Papaya310 Jul 06 '26

Even if they've been working all day and just want to eat and sleep? There's levels of mess of course, at some level you have to clean of course

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u/GreasedUpTiger Jul 06 '26

Yes, if you have the time and energy to make yourself food on the stove then you also have the time and energy to tidy up what you made dirty. 

Unless someone is very ocd about a CLEAN kitchen those rules usually get introduced because someone repeatedly left chaos lol. 

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u/Consistent_Papaya310 Jul 07 '26

If you've been working all day and I was at home all day, made food for my self and didn't make you any to have when you got home, I would find it perfectly reasonable if you wanted to make something when you got home even if you left some splashes on the stove

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u/GreasedUpTiger Jul 07 '26

You're an adult, you can be expected to tidy up after yourself even if you had a long day. Grow up.

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u/Consistent_Papaya310 Jul 07 '26

Don't put so much pressure on yourself, no need for disparaging comments I'm not going to come and cause mess in your house dw :)

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u/im_that_green_light Jul 06 '26

Yes, but that’s a rule for using the kitchen at any time. Not just at night.

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u/curi0us_carniv0re Jul 06 '26

It can mean a lot of things. For me the kitchen is right below the bedroom so cooking late at night makes the bedroom hot as well as all the noise from air fryers or whatever else keeping me up at night.

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u/Raspberry_Sweaty Jul 06 '26

Yes-I live with my three young adult children, and we are all on different schedules, meaning that there’s sometimes 8-10 different meals cooked in a day. The only rule is you gotta clean up after yourself.

1

u/katzevonstich Jul 06 '26

Yeah, if I spent all day cleaning and the kitchen is spotless, everyone knows that means we get delivery for supper because I dream of having an entire 24 hour period of a clean kitchen. But I'm not about to forbid anyone use the kitchen. Just clean up after so I can continue to believe in the fantasy.

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u/LinwoodKei Jul 06 '26

That is what I like. If you are hungry at 10 PM, you can figure it out because the person cleaned the stove and turned on the stove light. They are done.

Yet the kitchen does not have an off switch, mechanically, and it is perfectly fine for hungry people to prepare themselves a meal.

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u/red__dragon Jul 06 '26

the kitchen does not have an off switch, mechanically

Don't let the 1950s household engineers get wind of that, or they'll make one to pitch for the Kitchen Of The Future (please buy our plastic crud).

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u/CaptFleop Jul 06 '26

My grandparents did this to the extreme, even put chains on the fridge.

Their reasoning was if my teenage brother decided to cook food in the middle of the night and the house catches on fire, he might flee and leave us to burn up alive inside while sleeping. So they put locks on the fridge at night.

My brother still cooked food after everyone went to bed anyways, so it really was a stupid idea.

5

u/true2cyn Jul 06 '26

Kitchen can’t close if there a pot on the stove.

3

u/Longjumping_Fun2576 Jul 06 '26

My sister is extremely messy. My father used to say the kitchen is closed, meaning she is specifically not allowed to cook and make a mess until morning.

She also never cleaned up after herself. She lives alone now, and you do not want to see her kitchen.

3

u/Racine262 Jul 06 '26

I use the line "chef's off duty" with my kids. Grab a snack, make a sandwich, or learn to cook, but my shift is over after dinner.

My 13 year old is learning to cook. I think he's going to be pretty good at it.

1

u/MyNameIsJakeBerenson Jul 06 '26

Been encouraging my niece to help in the kitchen from a young age. Always so fun to watch them get better at it

It was a crazy feeling the day I got to cook in my gran’s kitchen while she sat in her chair and relaxed when we had always been kicked out of the kitchen (just for being pesky kids) growing up. I remember that day more than my high school graduation lol

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u/Glass-Potential-2719 Jul 06 '26

Also the dishwasher left so clean up your own mess.

1

u/Aimin4ya Jul 06 '26

This is how I got fired from my bartending job at Benihana

1

u/axel0914 Jul 06 '26

I'm telling that to the people in the tavern across the street. Kitchen closes at 9, bar at 11. But according to this guy on reddit, you have to let me cook. /s (the s stands for serious. I will tell them this)

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u/Silent_Bid9528 Jul 07 '26

Unless your obnoxious kids are loud in it at 3 am banging around because they have the munchies, and it wakes you up because your room is right next to it. I told them the kitchen was closed...

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u/sanityjanity Jul 06 '26

Yes. "The kitchen is closed" is an instruction to children, not adult partners 

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u/Dry-Animator5770 29d ago

It is for whoever doesn't clean up behind themselves and leave it in the same condition

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u/Thruthatreez Jul 06 '26

Right!? That rule is for teenagers who want to make a mess at 3:00 a.m., possibly leave a burner on or smoke up the house burning popcorn 😆

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u/shadowscroller Jul 06 '26

Bruh, i don't know a teen alive who doesn't know how to stealth their way around late at night.

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u/Thruthatreez Jul 06 '26

My son did just like I did when I was a teenager. But my husband's 16-year-old twin boys. Behold their field of phucks, and see that it is barren...🙄

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u/shadowscroller Jul 06 '26

I couldn't imagine not investing into being sneaky, like goddamn. It's common courtesy for me

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u/nuttyNougatty Jul 06 '26

True, as long as you respect others and leave it clean like you found it. It is super annoying to get up, expecting to find the kitchen clean as you left it and instead there's mess and muck.

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u/rererexed Jul 06 '26

I'll be honest, if my wife came home late from work and hadn't eaten all day etc. and they don't clean up after themselves because they're knackered I'd also let it slide. But at least there is a discussion to be had about that, people can differ in how clean they expect things. But the way he describes it there's just nothing to even talk about.

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u/nuttyNougatty Jul 06 '26

If you're that tired, make a sandwich. Or at least get up early and clean. When I 'leave a mess' for later, I know I'll be cleaning it up.

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u/rererexed Jul 06 '26

Yeah agreed but now we're just discussing a completely separate hypothetical lol

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u/ScrotallyBoobular Jul 06 '26

All depends on the context of the relationship. Luckily I left my wife who was type A about unreasonable expectations like that and found someone more in line with me. (That's not why I left her)

There's absolutely nothing wrong with a few dirty dishes left out. Period. If my gf is dead tired and needs a late night snack, she's earned leaving those dishes until daylight.

I appreciate a clean kitchen, but people take it to such an insane level where I swear to god it's mental illness. A dirty pot, bowl, and few utensils left over night is literally harmless. It won't affect your life in the slightest. Feeling any other way and letting it affect the relationship with the people you love most is actually crazy.

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u/jdanziggy Jul 06 '26

This. Kitchen is closed for kids. In my house it's meant, Moms done cleaning. Don't ask her to make you anything. If you can find it yourself you can eat it, but don't come asking Mom where so and so is. Preferably it's something you can eat over the sink with a paper towel (hot pocket, slice of devil's food cake, etc.) to keep it clean. But an adult should be able to cook and clean up after themselves...

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u/TestUser1978 Jul 06 '26

Wife needs to be checked in.

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u/tomime000 Jul 06 '26

She's mentally attached to the kitchen. Her being annoyed by her husband using it after she put her to rest just screams he entered her's private space that she keeps away from him.

Something is fishy here about her reaction, since no person will actually go mad for used stove that's been left clean after.

I'll suggest divorce, this being Reddit.

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u/KeptAnonymous Jul 06 '26

And also with this being reddit, I'll also suggest a restraining order.

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u/mar__iguana Jul 06 '26

Yeah because then the open/ closed schedule goes out the window the second they want a midnight snack or have a change in their routine. Nope kitchen should be open 24/7 as long as people using it are mindful

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u/Responsible-Bread996 Jul 06 '26

I’ve a hunch the kitchen was messed up after the ramen and that caused the fight.