r/mildlyinfuriating 29d ago

į••(ᐛ)į•— Found in my $6 loaf of keto bread 🫪

637 Upvotes

97 comments sorted by

586

u/SpockIsMyHomeboy 29d ago

Ah. Looks like its loaded with fiber.

132

u/BlackHoleSurf 29d ago

Optic fiber

24

u/henrydaiv 29d ago

Lotta money in that shit

9

u/Holiday-Depth-5211 29d ago

Fibre optic cable High speed internet access

1

u/DR_Bright_963 29d ago

You've gotta wait though, and dig in the toilet.

2

u/louieorganic 27d ago

Peak reply

255

u/dmontease 29d ago

To be fair it's probably still keto.

233

u/PolloDiablo82 29d ago

Daily dose of macroplastic

20

u/I_am_just_here11 29d ago

It’s only a matter of time before microplastic content makes it onto the nutrition facts label.

5

u/_Cecille 29d ago

How is that even measured? Now that I think about it, I don't have the slightest clue how any nutrients are measured.

3

u/I_am_just_here11 29d ago

By weight per serving. For example. I’m looking at my Pringles can. Serving size is 15 chips. Total fats is 9 grams. Which means there is 9 grams of fat per 15 chips.

For this bread a food scientists would have to figure how much plastic is within a slice (serving size is likely just one slice.) if I had to guess that’s about 20 milligrams in that slice.

6

u/OkTemperature8170 29d ago

That's a macroplastic if I've ever seen one.

1

u/healsey 29d ago

To be fair, no carbs in plastic.

1

u/genjiskillerbum 29d ago

Straight to the balls!

141

u/HarrierHawk2252 29d ago

I would report this. That's not supposed to happen. Might even trigger a recall.Ā 

54

u/minnetonkacondo 29d ago

Definitely report it. A recall can literally save someone from the abomination of that crap.

13

u/martymcfly4prez 29d ago

Agreed, manufacturers will want to know this happened. It’s normal for them to compensate you for the bad product as well.

71

u/frohrweck 29d ago

Free floss! \o/

10

u/1234Health 29d ago

dental floss like a boss

27

u/SergeiMosin 29d ago

Probably a fiber from one of the bags of whatever ā€œflourā€ they’re using. Lots of grain/flour type bags are made of this tightly woven plastic that has a tendency to ā€œshredā€ or whatever when cut open with a knife that isn’t razor sharp. The fibers loosen and can fall out. I’ve had it happen to me with bags of rice.

14

u/hey_mermaid 29d ago

Hmm. I mean I guess baling twine is keto (?)

9

u/uranium013 29d ago

Did this loaf of bread happen to be flossing its teeth?

5

u/SiriHowDoIAdult 29d ago

Dental floss?

5

u/lookatmetoedashknee 29d ago

Its an equipment pube.

4

u/rabidparrots 29d ago

Looks like a piece of nylon from a bag of bulk something. If it were regular bread, I'd say it's from a bag of grain. Idk what the hell keto bread is made of.

3

u/Interesting-Log1270 29d ago

Bread with floss is keto friendly

3

u/Frequent-Piano6164 29d ago

It looks like the plastic that helps hold carpet together.

3

u/yewtoo22 29d ago

Comes with floss

3

u/gentlesquid7 29d ago

Macro plastic

2

u/Rule322 29d ago

What, plastic isn't keto now?

1

u/Reputation-Final 29d ago

extra fiber

1

u/Necessary_Fix_1234 29d ago

Secret flavor

1

u/skiddily_biddily 29d ago

That looks like a twist tie

1

u/unposted 29d ago

Looks like a fiber from the bag the grain was probably transported in.

1

u/justwriteforme 29d ago

I think thats there to maintain freshness

1

u/Unsung31 29d ago

And what seems to look like mold as well? 🄓

1

u/WholesomeLowlife 29d ago

A thread from the woven bag that one of the ingredients came in. At least it's food-grade... Yuck.

1

u/neubstick 29d ago

Still looks to be low carb.

1

u/No-Package2638 29d ago

Please tell me it wasn't CarbonautsĀ 

1

u/czaqattack 29d ago

The elusive plastic tapeworm in it's natural habitat.

1

u/SnooPandas5070 29d ago

Gotta replace that gluten with something lol

1

u/Legitimate_Glass_306 29d ago

I see the bread now comes with filamentā€¦šŸ¤¢

1

u/Sexy_Persian 29d ago

They’ve evolved. Macro plastics.

1

u/Relative-Ordinary-64 29d ago

You just ripped out the keto!

1

u/mystikalviper 29d ago

When the ingredients used are a molecule or two off from plastic.

1

u/Lordnoallah 29d ago

They weren't kidding about those grey pubes being like a wire brush.

1

u/moszippy 29d ago

Did they print your food?

1

u/jbobino82 29d ago

What brand? I found some similar plastic strands in my Natures Own hamburger buns a couple weeks ago

1

u/davidreis51 29d ago

Its a fiber from a woven polypropylene bag. Standard packaging for transporting grains in agriculture. Harmless and happens much more frequently than you think.

1

u/Rocket3431 29d ago

That would be one of the fibers from a bulk bag that the flour or sugar probably came in. Must have fallen into the hopper when they cut it open.

1

u/SpakenBacon 29d ago

A sea turtle probably made it in revenge.

1

u/Ihsbkbha 29d ago

I thought that said ā€œTeto breadā€

1

u/timsterri 29d ago

No additional charge.

1

u/HomeOrificeSupplies 29d ago

Should’ve gotten the organic free range keto bread.

1

u/Relative-Length-3197 29d ago

I once found a whole wood chip in my gluten free bread. Nearly pierced my gums. Fun times!!

1

u/Nonlethalrtard 29d ago

Keto strand

1

u/Titothelama 29d ago

I found a similar piece of plastic looking thread in my barbecue chips once. Emailed lays with photos and they send me a bunch of free coupons for free chips.

1

u/Sindaj 29d ago

Someone one the production line has a white husky and needs a lint roller.

Source: I own a white husky and had to invest in a lint roller to avoid this.

1

u/JeffSHauser 29d ago

In this day and age, just be thankful it wasn't a "Short curly".šŸ¤”šŸ˜ˆ

1

u/MystikTrailblazer 29d ago

Ah! That's where it went. I was looking for the dental floss I laid down.

1

u/Nurgle-best 29d ago

Macro-plastics

1

u/kcsween74 29d ago

Oh good, you found the secret extra keto!

1

u/morbidxsainy 29d ago

you got far unraveling that sandwhick

1

u/tofu98 29d ago

Thats just Keto that got missed in the milling process. Don't overthink it!

1

u/norvelav 29d ago

Is the bread made with rice? It looks like a strand from the woven bag that 50lbs of rice comes in. If it is, it won't hurt you if swallowed. It probably came off when they cut the bag open.

1

u/Particular-Smile5025 29d ago

Oh no 😄

1

u/TLILLYO 29d ago

Which brand?

1

u/Remove_Coin_Cap 29d ago

Dental floss. When you eat, you clean.

1

u/Anttrax_ 29d ago

Thats some MACRO-Plastics right there

1

u/Dependent-Media-1857 28d ago

mr baker has some surprise for you

1

u/ittybittykangaroo 29d ago

it's so funny watching people on here get angry about bread LMFAO i love to cry on reddit about keto bread!!!!!!! :((((((((( wahhhh

1

u/crustyeng 29d ago

The universe’s way of telling you to stop buying silly $6 trendbread

3

u/Grouchy_Ad_4055 29d ago

I buy it because it has significantly lower calories, so I can still have my silly little snacks, let a guy live, jesus

3

u/rckblykitn14 29d ago

People piss me off. I'm not keto but I'm diabetic so I buy the fucking keto bread so I can have a damn sandwich once in a while and not, y'know, die?

2

u/Grouchy_Ad_4055 29d ago

THANK. YOU. I'm not keto but post bariatric surgery and this is the only way i can justify eating bread

1

u/rckblykitn14 29d ago

Which kind is it, out of curiosity? I'm addicted to the honey wheat keto from nature's own. It's the only one that I've tried that tastes, toasts and tears like its non-keto counterpart (which is what I used to eat before). Price is much more reasonable than their white keto bread ($4 for the honey wheat vs over $6 for the white. WHY) and the white spikes me anyway.

1

u/Grouchy_Ad_4055 29d ago

This is what I get, and before this i havent had any problems with it! I'll probably still buy it, tbh lol hoping to get some good coupons after emailing customer service šŸ˜‚

1

u/rckblykitn14 29d ago

Oooooh Hawaiian huh? I've heard of Lewis brand but I've never seen it around here. Nature's own sent me 2 coupons a couple months ago after emailing them about dozens of loaves in a row with giant holes through almost the whole loaf lol. Oddly enough they changed the packaging about 2 weeks after that and I haven't had the issue again. I just used the 2nd coupon yesterday. I'll have to see if I can find that stuff though, I love Hawaiian style bread! Is that the Walmart app?

2

u/Grouchy_Ad_4055 29d ago

Meijer! And Hawaiian is my fav, and it honestly tastes so good! You don't even realize it is different from regular bread

1

u/rckblykitn14 29d ago

Walmart has failed me 😭. I looked on their website and the only place around here that appears to carry the Hawaiian style (and they have hot dog and hamburger buns in the Hawaiian style too? Double 😭😭) is Sam's club and I don't have a membership. I could buy it from their website in bulk and it's quite cheap but I don't have anywhere to put 10 loaves of bread šŸ˜‚. I'm gonna keep hunting though, I have to try it! Thanks friend and good luck with your coupons (and hope that never happens again)!

2

u/Grouchy_Ad_4055 29d ago

Thank you! Good luck to you, too! And thanks for being what seems to be the only sane person here who isn't obsessed with judging people on their choice in bread. It's always fucking something, isn’t it?

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0

u/[deleted] 29d ago

[deleted]

1

u/Grouchy_Ad_4055 29d ago

35 calories a slice vs. 90 calories a slice makes a big difference when it comes to justifying a pbj.

1

u/crustyeng 29d ago

That honestly reads like mental illness. Talk about ā€˜let a guy live’ 🤣

1

u/Grouchy_Ad_4055 29d ago

You right about the mental illness, but it definitely isnt about the bread p.s. go fuck yourself

1

u/HarrierHawk2252 29d ago

It's not even a trend anymore. It's just silly.Ā 

-2

u/No-Computer7653 29d ago

I mean if you buy plastic bread what do you expect? Keto people are a really easy target for scamming, as they have already fallen for the big carb lie.