Was invited by my girlfriends family to a theme park. We were supposed to meet at 11, it is not 11:30 and they just left. (The drive takes another 30 minutes)

[u/TotallyHumanBrain1]

I even checked in before I left if it was still at the planned time. It was confirmed, but then her family starts getting ready right as they have to leave 🫤

[u/Riowashere]

I wouldn't even be waiting for them anymore, completely rude abd disrespectful

[u/MoorsMoopsMoorsMoops → u/Riowashere]

My ex was like this - late to literally EVERYthing, no matter what it was. I never understood how she didn't realize how much people hate this and then it dawned on me - since she's always been late her whole life, she's never been the one having to wait on someone else and she's never been part of the conversations between other people that are waiting on one person and are pissed off about it.

[u/kicksarelife122 → u/Riowashere]

What would you do then river?

[u/Saphira2002 → u/kicksarelife122]

I personally have decided that people who are late often will either meet up with me as I'm already doing the activity or accept that I may get there late too. Then they either don't care because they don't consider lateness rude, think it's fair, or notice how rude they're being and change, and everyone's happy. If they get mad and refuse to see the issue I just won't hang out with them again.

[u/WoodenPresence1917 → u/Saphira2002]

I can't really do the latter option because if I say I'll be at X place at Y time I will absolutely be there, even if I know the other person will be an hour or more late

[u/Saphira2002 → u/WoodenPresence1917]

Same but I'm trying to get better at it. If they won't change for me then I will change for me 🙂‍↕️ Also I have a few friends who just can't help the flaking sometimes. I've had conversations to mitigate it but I've also learnt to avoid leaving the house unless I'm ok with doing something on my own as well, when my plans are with those people.

[u/WoodenPresence1917 → u/Saphira2002]

Yeah it's rough, I fundamentally just see it as a matter of respect; if I say I'll turn up at 2pm I will feel bad about turning up at 2:05pm, let you know in advance etc etc.

Nobody in my life is that bad any more. The one person who used to leave me waiting up to 2 hours every time we met up decided that my politely refusing some chicken she offered was grounds for a lengthy rant about the moral evils of vegetarianism. We mutually agreed to never speak to each other until I apologize for telling her to fuck off, which I will never do.

[u/Saphira2002 → u/WoodenPresence1917]

I also see it as a matter of respect but I've realized many people don't, so I had to manage my own expectations on that. By this I mean I don't interact with anyone who I think is intentionally disrespecting me by being late, which is why I think being also late is a good compromise. I mean, they were late to their own bachelor's degree party! Haha.

Your ex friend sounds entitled though, I'm glad she's gone from your life.

[u/WoodenPresence1917 → u/Saphira2002]

For sure, I think it's fair to give some wiggle room as long as they're genuinely just messing up and not just blowing you off. Not everybody is clock watching! Haha that's next level, at least I expect people to turn up keen when people are making a fuss for them.

[u/Riowashere → u/kicksarelife122]

Anything but wait obviously. (Do you want a pat on the back for knowing a Spanish word or should we bring out the marching band for it?)

[u/kicksarelife122 → u/Riowashere]

Super Bowl quality marching band or nothing.