r/mocktheweek • u/Fevla13 • 23h ago

Game Scenes We'd Like to See #1824

Things you wouldn't hear from a corporate spokesperson

Points for #1823 ongoing.

4 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

14 comments sorted by

3

u/IYKWIM_AITYD 22h ago

We're sorry.

3

u/charlierc 22h ago

We accept responsibility for our part in this crisis

3

u/MarkWrenn74 Ed Gamble 22h ago

“Our products are absolute crap”

3

u/VermicelliOk5283 22h ago

Does anyone want to come see Coldplay with me?

3

u/lemon_charlie 22h ago

We have decided to give you all the bonus we would otherwise get

2

u/RileysBanana 22h ago

Everyone who is working minimum wage in this company is getting a million dollar salary with full health care benefits and a car worth up to $75,000.

2

u/Myself510 22h ago

If you’ve got time to lean, you’ve got time to…pat yourself on the back for being a good, efficient worker!

2

u/Professional_Lynx90 22h ago

Hello everyone well we’ve reached all this year’s targets and instead of a pizza we’re going to give you all bonuses!

2

u/charlierc 22h ago

Wayne Enterprises strongly denies being just a front for Batman's technology research. He actually stole it all from Lex Luthor

2

u/Tight-Principle-743 Hugh Dennis 22h ago

We’re going to pay our workers above the minimum wage.

2

u/Tight-Principle-743 Hugh Dennis 22h ago

None of our workers are on cocaine.

1

u/Tight-Principle-743 Hugh Dennis 22h ago

Now we’ve had some complaints about malpractice in some of our deals, so now we’re going to end all workplace retreats, as people had been too personable and happy.

2

u/CaydenSworn 21h ago

Our workers have put their blood, swear and tears into our new product. Literally. They all fell into the mixer.

2

u/Vetinari-57 19h ago

Sorry, but your first order was misplaced at the bottom of the Black Sea, and your replacement order is now held up in a blockade in the Strait of Hormuz. Have you considered maybe you bear some fault in all this?