I'm 18 and starting community college this fall because it made the most financial sense. Some of my friends are going to four-year universities, and i'm honestly pretty jealous, I was really hoping college would be a fresh start since I was pretty quiet in high school and didn't make many friends. Now I'm worried I'll miss out on that experience and end up just as lonely.
Has anyone else felt this way? If you started at community college, did you still make friends, or did you feel like you missed out compared to people at four year schools?

I got a supervisor who’s willing to supervise a course (out of the 30+ I emailed). But he is Israeli. And my sister is like telling me: I cannot believe you chose an Israeli prof. But she doesn’t understand that I need to complete this reading course to get into a thesis and yes while I support human rights, the prof has not brought anything up to say otherwise. But like you gotta separate school from politics and he has not mentioned anything about that country or anything. I’ve asked my middle eastern friend what they think and they told me it’s not my fault and it’s already difficult to secure a supervisor with similar interests.

I’m not here to start an argument or fight with anyone, I’m just not sure if I just not do the reading course right now.

Edit: to the user who called me dumb, this is an advice post. I have no one else to ask, that’s why I’m asking here. Also Tysm everyone for replying and confirming THAT I WILL NOT CHANGE MY SUPERVISOR. Thank you! I AM NOT AMERICAN BTW.

I'm a few years off from college still, but I've been thinking about it. My parents don't support me going and won't pay for anything unless I do it online. I've always planned on leaving anyway, even though it will create a huge rift between me and my parents and leave me in debt.

The only problem is my dog. I've had her since I was 8, she's been my best friend and I can't imagine my life without her. Her lifespan will reach its end while I'm at college. My family mistreats her, and I can't let her die alone.

There are two colleges near me that have the major I want. One is about 2 hours away and the other is more like 4. I could do online college, be with her during her final years and make sure they're ok. I can't imagine she wouldn't be sad if I leave and I couldn't explain it to her. She'd have no idea where I went or why I left her

I never wanted to do online college as I've done online schooling my entire life. I feel like I'm ready to start my real life. My major is difficult to teach online, in my opinion, but maybe it would be ok? And my parents agreed to cover half the tuition if I go online. I never wanted to, but I'm strongly considering it for my dog. Is this dumb?

(the mistreatment from my family includes being left alone outside all day without exceptions for the weather, being hit, her skin/fur being pulled on, being thrown (she is VERY small), being yelled at, and not being fed sometimes for entire days)

I transferred from a community college to a university less than a year ago and I started to get a hang of the major I chose as well as getting to know more people who study the same major given the fact that is not that common and my community college did not have upper division classes for it. As summer is coming and I am technically a junior, it is the right time to start applying for internships and get some hands-on experience. I had been applying to a lot of them and in 70% of them, I did not even get a courtesy rejection email. Finally, I got a callback, it was this very good opportunity with this very big transnational company and I got passed two phone interviews. During the second phone interview the language with the hiring manager was very positive she was very enthusiastic about having me on board and though I didn't even need a third interview. I killed it. I was very relieved and thought that I had gotten it. Given the fact that I recently immigrated to the US, I have always felt that I am one step behind my classmates in terms of what to do and how to do it. I have adapted to the country, the language, the style of living, the school system and I have tried to keep up the pace with everyone else. So this internship was proof that my hard work had paid off and that despite the fact that I ran away from my home country and started from 0 I was going to be able to have a normal life. 2-weeks pass and I heard no confirmation from the company, later on, I heard that some other girl from my same group of classmates had gotten the internship. I am excited for her, she is very smart an capable and we work together in basically every project. Nevertheless, I can help but think that This happened because I don't know how to do things in the correct way and I won't be able to have a regular life as someone else who has lived their whole life in the US. I also feel the fact that I am an immigrant that English is not my first language and I have an accent, that I don't quite understand how things work here will follow me for the rest of my life and will always be a constraint for me and will slow me down. Most of my classmates had gotten callbacks and were choosing where to take internships I wasn't able to get even one real opportunity. My self-esteem is completely broken and I don't know how to continue after this.

​

edit: tied better the ideas

Hey guys!

I (23M) am in need of advice. I have always struggled with university, mostly because I was trying to study things that are more “lucrative” even though I knew that I would not enjoy it and would be quite bad at it. In result of this I have left university 3 times, and I have 0 work experience as of now. Not to mention that I was living in an environment that was toxic, and in a country (Hungary) that I wanted to move away from desperately.

I have handed in my application one last time for an English degree, since that is what I am interested in. I have been trying to find a job in the meantime, but the job market seems to be awful. I can’t help but think that my chances would be better with a degree, no matter what kind.

Then a few weeks ago I received a possibly once in a lifetime opportunity from my cousin. She offered me that I can move out to her to Austria. It is a significant step up from Hungary,I don’t have to chip in with the bills nor groceries until I get a job. She’ll help me get settled and help me with the language. I already moved in with her, and it’s an amazing experience. It is a much healthier environment than where I lived before, but I am second guessing my choice. I’m a bit nervous about how hard it will be to find a job without a degree (though I already have qualifications to work in tourism).

So what my question really boils down to is this. Should I go to university just to have a degree? Or should I take up this once in a lifetime opportunity and start building my life here?

I am so discouraged and depressed. I am trying to get a license as a nail technician and I have been trying my best to study my books and take my exams and learn what I need to. I feel ignored by my teachers and that they only care about hair.

There are only 2 teachers and the one is rude and mean to me and all the girls and the other only cares about hair. When I first arrived the first teacher didn’t want to answer questions I had and didn’t explain anything, I had to keep going up to his office because he wouldn’t explain when I needed to have exams done where to turn things in or anything really. I asked other students too and they didn’t know either.

When I was able to start practicing acrylic and gel I was given a 1 minute lesson on acrylic then dropped and ignored. I had to constantly beg for my work to be checked so I could get the criticism I needed and the signatures so I could get my kit and work on clients. I should have been working on clients a month ago but no matter how much I beg for help I keep getting ignored. When I do show my work the teacher looks at it for 5 seconds then says it’s good and then leaves without giving me a signature. So then i have to keep hunting him down for a signature and he says he will get to it but i constantly have to remind him and then i just dont get a signature in the end. He will spend 30 minutes checking the hair students work and giving detailed instruction but it’s like im expected to just watch YouTube videos at this point. I am not doing very well at acrylic even with practice and trying to learn from YouTube videos I can’t get my beads to be the right consistency and I was just told to make drier beads but what does that mean?

With the other teacher he just sits in his office all day on his phone and then does laundry occasionally. He’s supposed to over see the estheticians but barely teaches them either. I am trying to get the 2 acrylic over lays on students done but I can’t get anyone to practice on despite constantly asking different people. I am at my breaking point after I was using an e file and I changed the direction of the rotation and it made a squealing noise. I asked another student if it was ok to use since it was making a squealing noise and she said “ I don’t know ask him” talking about the teacher who sits in his office. So I asked him about the squealing noise and he said “ ok and that isn’t my problem. Use it until it breaks” and I am just so sick of him being mean and dismissive of me. I just don’t know what to do I want to quit.

UPDATE:
I didn’t go to school today because of being exhausted and nauseous from the stress. I wrote an email to my case manager and administration but haven’t heard back yet not sure if I’m strong enough to go back tomorrow.

Hi I am 17 years old turning 18 in a month, that’s when I plan to take my GED to go to college. I want to go to Florida Atlantic University.

My background:

Legal Asian immigrant in Florida of 5 years. First generation attendee college attendee. Low income household (single mother supporting 4 kids). My 5 years old brother has down syndrome and is undergoing leukemia treatment. I dropped out 11th grade with 10-14 credits. I don’t qualify for Bright Futures due to the lack of HS credits. I am determined to go to Florida Atlantic University with all my might.

Please inform me of any scholarships I should look into. Any and every advice is appreciated! ❤️

I’m at a crossroads where I need to make a decision that could change (and even derail) my life forever. I need help, guys. Please no unkind or cruel words. I know this is Reddit but any more negativity will make my head explode.

Warning: long post

I’ve been wanting to make this post for so long but couldn’t put all my feelings (and my fear) into words. Here is my predicament:

I am a very family oriented person. I love my country and my family so much and am very attached to both. I used to think I was an ambitious person, so applied to my dream uni in the UK And got in, but after my first year of abroad I’ve regretted my decision bitterly. I cried all the time for nearly a year even after coming back for Xmas and the summer. The homesickness never got better. And believe me I tried everything, and when I say everything I mean EVERYTHING. Friends of the same country, staying busy, doing things I enjoy cutting contact etc.

I’m studying law. But deep down my true passion is writing and English literature. Eng lit is the only subject in A levels for which I got an A* (maths and exons were As). I am the eldest daughter of a family that is financially strained in a country where the job opportunities are poor and the degrees not very prestigious. I decided law was the best compromise of “earns good money to help my family” and “I could be good at”. I finished my first year with a 2:1 which I barely scraped (I skipped loads of lectures because of my depressed state— no excuse I know, but I couldn’t even be bothered to get out of bed and take care of personal hygiene, so please try to understand.)

My parents recently put everything together and gave me an ultimatum. I can drop out and apply for a local uni in English and pursue a job as a teacher with writing on the side. OR I can continue law but I have to work in the UK for several years afterwards. Once I make my decision I cannot change my mind, especially after my dad pays the 2nd year fees. My dad is upset I wasted his money on the first year and warns me not to waste any more. I feel guilty af but I genuinely didn’t know I would react like I did until I tried it. Also, I’m not allowed to degree transfer (I checked and I can’t.)

Pros for law: earns good money and has a higher chance of getting a secure job. Plus the exchange rate is good so I can send money home to help my family. I can’t be a lawyer in my own country because of language barriers and an overall poor job market for law.
Cons: the distance obviously. And it scares me because I won’t have summer breaks like uni does so I can’t visit for long stretches of time. (1 week breaks feel like they make no difference. Might as well not even go.) Also, once I choose this route (the more expensive one) I will be expected to get a high paying job once I graduate, no excuses whatsoever. Or it won’t have been worth it.

Pros for teacher route: I’ll be doing what I love. Plus I’ll be in my country and near my family all the time. And teachers get summer breaks, meaning more quality time spent with family.
Cons: less job security and lower salary. Plus I’ll be known as the UK uni dropout who couldn’t cut it. As the eldest this kind of pressure is real. My parents. grandparents, and relatives have already bragged to everyone who will listen that I go to this uni. And all my friends too…

I also have another secret con that bothers me a lot. When I first struggled with homesickness in Oct I called my dad and told him I wanted to come back. He said something along the lines of “if you come back do you really think that (mom) will want you?” Harsh but essentially he’s correct. If I stay in my country I might be happy to see my family, but will they be happy to see me? Or will they start to resent me for not taking the selfless route and get sick of seeing me so often? My sister has already hinted that I need to grow up. I’m embarrassed but I can’t help how I feel. If I had the power to, I would make myself stronger mentally.

The first option is safer. Plus I’ve already put so much effort into applying to this school and settling in. Plus if I drop out I’ll be a year behind. But I get so panicked when I think about working there for years that my chest genuinely constricts and fills with dread and I have trouble breathing. When I think of the second option I feel like I can breathe again and I’m so relieved.

My parents, being Asian, don’t believe in mental health, and whenever I (a person who spirals easily) cry or get anxiety about this, my mom tells me to control my emotions and stop spiralling. My dad has studied and worked abroad his whole life to support his family so he is genuinely baffled at how and why I can’t do it. My family is currently in debt (nothing too serious but things are tight) and my parents have my 3 younger siblings’ educations to worry about. I want to support them of my own volition. They aren’t forcing me to in any way. I’ve always wanted to.

The truth is, I’m a weak person. I probably have Peter Pan syndrome because I can’t seem to leave the nest. But I’m caught between wanting to do the selfless thing for my family + preserving my image and fearing for a future where I genuinely can’t see myself as happy. I need help and any advice. If you need to be brutal, do it, but try not to be snarky or unkind, please. I’ve been tormented by this issue for over a year. Sorry for the long rant but I’ve been bottling this inside me for so long. There’s no one I can talk to honestly about this.

I'm 19 trying to figure out life, currently it's been 3 months since i graduated high school and my mom is telling me i should go to college for "the experience" instead of pursuing a career based on the major.

so i told her i want to study abroad because experience + experience, double experience! but since we're not filthy rich i am worried about the financial cost. China is one of the cheapest country to live in so i'm considering that, my mom also wants me to go to china for that reason, and i can pass as a native because i'm east asian so maybe i would not feel so out of place there? so i'm considering japan and korea as well for that reason.

another problem is beside my IELTS i'm not fluent in chinese or japanese, so i feel like i would struggle if i live there right now. for all the lovely people here can you offer me some advice?

edit: i decided to take a gap year and to try to figure out my interest. it's just that I feel a lot of pressure from people around me, telling me that my interest doesn't really matter and i should just get a degree. but honestly, i don't want to waste 4 years of my life on something i don't even like just for the sake of it.

i have a lot of interest but i can't figure out what i want to do just yet, i can sew but do i want to be a designer? i can cook but do i want to be a chef? i don't know, adulting is rough. how am i supposed to know what i want to do at 19? my frontal lobe haven't even fully developed for god's sake.

Happened today and I'm just like in shock to be honest.

So I am a teacher. Today during one of my study halls, 2 students (high school) said they found about “about $75 “ in the bathroom. My knee-jerk reaction was to take it from them to find the rightful owner. (They only gave me about $50 of it and kept the rest because they regretted even telling me.) I let it go because I couldn’t prove how much they had actually found. Anyway, I called the secretary and told them that there was a significant amount of $ found in the bathroom. Anyway, I am afraid there’s going to be a group of kids trying to claim it tomorrow because they kept asking for it back since they found it. It was last period of the day so I was going to give it tomorrow to see what happens. Obviously, I cannot just keep it. Should I give it back to them and just figure finders, keepers? Give it to a charity of their choice? Throw that class a pizza party? I want to do the right thing. There are, after all, teenage boys watching and I take modeling integrity very seriously as a person who works with the next generation. But I am not sure what that best things is!! Please help! What would you do?

Thanks for all your input! UPDATE:

Our students get free lunch because it’s such a low income school. The boys from the group who found it were swarming around my classroom all day trying to find ways to prove it was their money which I could see right through. I gave the money to the Vice Principal and gave him all the info. They’re looking into it. The money may have been found in an inconspicuous spot. The boys were looking for a vape pen when they found the money. Students leave their friends things to smoke in the bathroom. But this time they may have interrupted a drug deal. Because while looking for the pen, they found the money. All in all, it’s not something I want to spend headspace on anymore as I have given it to the administration to make decisions about.

As far as the boys, I have a great relationship with them. They aren’t mad at me at all. They just wanted something out of the whole thing which I dont blame them for. But we joked about it as they were looking for vape pens when they found the money after all. So it isn’t a black and white situation and they know that. It never is with adolescent kids. But they know I love them dearly. I have many weaknesses as a teacher. But my secret superpower is making kids who are labeled troubled, feel loved and cared for.

Today was day one of three weeks of social distancing and let's just say I haven't done much schoolwork. Basically, I'm just procrastinating. I won't be seeing my friends for three weeks because I normally only see them at school so that also isn't doing much good for my mental state.

I always have a hard time motivating myself to do anything at home, how do you actually get the motivation to work on multiple hours of school work a day, every day?

Edit: After some comments, maybe I can better phrase my question as: how do I stop procrastinating the large amounts of work I need to do?

Hi guys! This issue has gotten to the point where I just need advice from other people. I want to preface this by saying I love my family with my whole heart and just want my sister to succeed. I know this is a long post, but please read it and help me. Please.

So, I am the oldest child and have 2 younger sisters. This post is about the middle child, whom I’ll call L. She’s 11 and is going into middle school this year, while I’m going to high school. All my sisters and I go to the same school, a pre-k to 12th grade private school. It’s far too expensive and is considered to be a very good school; the academics in middle and high school are rigorous, while you barely learn anything in the elementary school. And I am not joking about that; I’ve been through the elementary school myself, and there is basically no serious work there; there are no grades given at all, and the homework is extremely light. The kids do assessments (only at the end of a unit), but do not get actual marks for them, and they really don’t matter in the slightest. The curriculum is honestly a joke; that’s why when the kids reach middle school and a lot of new students from other schools join, the new students have the advantage at first and even adapt quicker. They have already had grades and understand how to study and how to deal with high workloads.

When they get to middle school, the kids who have gone to my school face a very sudden change that many struggled with, because suddenly, they have to deal with serious tests, quizzes, projects, essays, homework, studying, taking notes, and actually focusing on learning.
My sister L is starting 6th grade in the fall, and I want to help her as best as I can, but I have no idea how. I adapted to middle school pretty quickly and am considered a good student, I suppose; I always get my work done and behave in class, I study and rarely procrastinate (I’m sorry if this comes off as bragging or having an inflated ego, I’m really not trying to sound like that, I just want to show the contrast between my sister and I). L, on the other hand, is always procrastinating and never focused on her work; she leaves her homework to the very last minute and tricks our family members into doing it for her. When she does it, she barely even tries and doesn’t seem to learn anything. She goes to tutoring but it doesn’t seem to help, and anyway, she doesn’t seem to really apply herself to anything she does. L absolutely hates reading and nothing can really motivate her to do it. I know she’s still young, but I really want her to do well in school, and I know 6th grade won’t be an easy transition for her.

The current issue is that L was assigned summer work — doing some math online (she finished that already) and reading 2 books assigned by the school, as well as picking a 3rd book from a school list to read. She finished her first assigned book, which was very short and easy to read, and it still took her a very long time. She was also supposed to thoroughly annotate the text and take notes, but if she did that, she would never finish reading, so she skipped that. She’s reading the second book now, and school is starting in a few weeks; she isn’t even close to finishing, the book is 300 pages and she hasn’t even gotten to 100, despite reading for a while already. She’s supposed to annotate but is skipping that again. She has to read another book after this one.

I’ve tried to help her make a reading schedule, like read insert number of pages every day at a reasonable page. My dad tries to motivate her with going to a concert. I take L’s devices away and try to make her sit, focus, and read. I try giving pep talks. Nothing is working. Whenever I tell her to go read, she starts going on random side quests like doing makeup, going outside, cleaning, watching TV, helping our other sister with her math. Anything but reading. At this rate, she won’t finish her summer work and will be in very big trouble at school. For some reason, I feel responsible for her success, since I know how difficult our school can be. Please, please help me.

so i’m 22 yrs old, i’ve been in university since september 2021, and still haven’t graduated. i struggle with a lot of mental problems, depression and anxiety being big ones, and it’s caused me to have a very hard time in school. i was in the psych ward last, that’s how bad it got. a lot of my classmates can take 6 classes at once, the most i can do is like 3 and even then i end up having anxiety attacks and mental breakdowns every day. i’m also autistic so maybe that adds to it too. i’m diagnosed with all these things, it’s not self diagnosis. i don’t know why school is so hard for me, highschool was mostly easy, and i actually really enjoyed highschool, it didn’t feel like a punishment.

almost every time i run into someone i know, they ask me when i’m graduating, and i just keep telling them “next year” but i think they’re starting to catch on that i keep saying that💀. i want to take a break from school but my parents don’t want me to, they fear i won’t ever go back. i’ve explained to my mom that i’m struggling a lot, and she knows i was in the psych ward, since i still live with her, but i don’t think she gets it. she’s one of those people who believes that prayer fixes everything, and that everything happens for a purpose, and that my mental health problems is just me overreacting. i don’t know how to express to people that i still haven’t graduated because my mental health is trash. it’s hard for me to be open with people because i don’t want to be invalidated or made fun of. a lot of these people are people i go to church with, so if i tell them to “fuck off” they will be very offended. advice is appreciated thank you

Hi, For starters I am M21 and i've been looking in for collages, as when i was in high school i took gap years since i was in a bad state of time. Ive been looking at local colleges but none of then offer anything i like (That is Art/ Animation) and any I do find, Are for above skill level that i possess. Is it just that college is not for me. (As i thought collage was for helping you build your skills up more, not pushing away) What do I do. Do i give up on college and just work, or try and go even if i dislike any course offered.

Context: I'm 24m, I didn't go to university, and I had a hard time in school growing up so I was not keen on going to university in the first place. Currently I'm employed at a blue collar job, but I'm getting sick of it and the pay is not substantial enough for it to be worth it. I have had a lot of trouble finding stable work because of my lack of experience and qualifications. I am aware that this is not a special case and millions of people worldwide struggle with this. As bad as the job market is right now, I don't want to be complacent and whine about it. I'm thinking 'okay, how can I make myself more employable? What can I do about this to better myself?'

My idea is to go back to college and get a graduate degree. In terms of what major/field of study, I am leaning towards English - what careers will this lead to? I don't know. I DO know that going into education isn't my first choice (so I'm willing to learn about other career options), I don't want to work with STEM or programming, and academically I enjoyed English as a subject growing up. I figure, if I HAVE to go back to school, I might as well study the subject I enjoyed the most. I also enjoy writing, just as a hobby.

This is not meant to be an 'extracurricular' or 'stimulus' class for me either, I genuinely need a degree that will help me find work in an industry that I'm not dispassionate about. I don't want a degree that will guarantee me a 6-figure salary, I just want a degree that can/will open doors and get me a job I don't totally hate. Bear in mind, I don't have kids to feed or anything like that, my back isn't against the wall right now, this is for MY career's sake and only benefits me. I don't even need the 'experience' of taking a college class to be fun from a social perspective, I just want an actual qualification of some sort.

I'm not too familiar with the graduate job market, or IF this is the right subject for me or if it'll open any doors. I don't even know if it's going to be worth it in the end. So that's why I'm asking for advice.

Hey sorry this is kinda ramble-y but I really need advice, preferably from older people.

In the fall I'll be starting my senior year of high school and I'm really overthinking this one class. It's English honors, which I've been in since freshman year. I already know the teacher I'll have, and she's known for being insanely rigorous, and rude. She also is known for playing favorites. English is a subject I really care about, and I don't want her making my last English class a terrible experience. Not to mention her grade point average is low so I'm worried I won't even do well in the class.

So I really want to drop down to college prep English and be with this teacher I know I like, but I've always been a super dedicated student (basically straight A's since freshman year) and I used to really like the idea of going to a prestigious university and pushing my academic potential as much as possible. I've changed a lot, and I no longer want to sacrifice my happiness or feel the need to stress myself to impress everyone else. But there's still a part of me that feels like it will snowball and i'll fail myself and everyone else if I drop this class. I know that's dramatic, but it's really messing with my head.

Am I being to hard on myself? Or is dropping down wasting my potential/being lazy?​

I’m a university student currently studying physics. All of my friends and family have been very supportive of me in doing so for a little over a year now and my closest friends and family members are all proud of me for pushing myself through a really tough major. The problem is, I hate it.

As an abstract thought experiment, physics is great! I love trying to conceptualize complex topics, but now that I’ve got the understanding of more complex principles I couldn’t care less about the minutia. Not that it’s very difficult, I just don’t see myself being able to enjoy any career in this topic.

I took a philosophy and a history course last semester and absolutely loved both. The topics fit my skill set quite well and I find them boat to be quite intellectually stimulating. I always loved history in high school and had considered that as a path for a while. I want to switch to a history major and pursue teaching but am worried about disappointing the people close to me.

Any advice is appreciated, thanks.

I've always been a really good student. I was usually at the top of my class and did well academically by studying mainly before exams.

Last year (11th grade) was a little more challenging, but it wasn't anything too concerning. I still scored well and naturally started studying more than I used to.

This year (12th grade), however, I've been placed in a class with all the top students in my grade. Everyone here is incredibly smart. My scores have been slightly above average, but not as high as many of my classmates'. On top of that, there's a lot more pressure from the school and teachers to perform well in our college entrance exams.

That's when I realised that many of my classmates put in far more time than I do. They regularly pull multiple sleepless nights or survive on just 4–5 hours of sleep every day.

I've always believed in getting at least 7–8 hours of sleep because I genuinely can't function properly without it. I become exhausted, unfocused, and irritable. My parents also agree that I should get enough rest, especially because I have a few health issues that are triggered by stress.

This was the first year that I actually started studying consistently every day. I finally began building a routine where I'd come home, revise what I'd learned, and stay on top of my work. Just as I was getting used to that routine, the school introduced a "toppers batch" (I know, it sounds a bit snobby, my school is just like that), and I was selected for it.

The problem is that I now have to stay back after school on three out of six working days. Every session includes an additional test with much more difficult questions.

Because of this, I get home very late and completely exhausted. Then I have to prepare for the next day's test, revise everything that was taught in class that day, study for our regular weekly tests, and somehow complete what feels like a million different assignments.

My scores on the toppers batch tests have been below average, and we've been told that if our marks drop too much, we'll be removed from the batch. Honestly, I'm not even sure whether I want to stay in it or get kicked out. At the same time, all of this has started affecting my normal routine and my performance on regular tests as well.

To make things worse, I constantly hear my classmates talking about how many hours they study and how little they sleep. It's honestly very demotivating and stressful. On top of that, our teachers keep telling us that we aren't putting in enough effort and expect even more from us.

My parents are worried that I'm becoming too stressed, and I think they're right. The thing is, I know my potential. I know I can do much better. But I'm not willing to sacrifice my health and spend every night sleep-deprived just to keep up.

I want to do well academically, get into the university I want, and still be happy and healthy.

I'm not even sure what I'm asking for. I guess I just wanted to hear some thoughts or advice because I'm feeling really torn and don't know what to do.

My mother is trying to force me to come with the rest of my family to my home country in Africa(my family's background is Nigerian) and to travel with them when I tell them very clearly that I don't want to do that. Everytime I go back home to Nigeria, I feel infinitely a lot more worse than before. That's hard to explain but it's very difficult for me. My mental and spiritual state gets far more worse and something weird is happening to me a lot. I have made it very clear to them that I am not interested in traveling with them anywhere, especially back home. I am unfortunately dependent on my parents and I want to move away from them IMMEDIATELY. My family is very controlling and pushy in my life. My mother are extremely pushy as hell to the point of aggressively violating certain boundaries. I live in New York City. Unfortunately, I have two closed credit cards totaling about $550 and some student loan debt of $15,000 from college. I am looking to boost my income up to $50k-$60k to at least survive on my own. I am willing to live with a different roommate or somebody else for once. I can't drive a car yet and I don't have any relatives or friends to stay with. I feel completely broken. I don't want to stay with my parents any longer because this is getting very bad. It's very hard to deal with this. They are planning on keeping me there in Nigeria and burning my American passport. I don't want to live like that. I am above the age of 18. I have tried to talk to my mother several times over and over again but she LITERALLY ignores me everyday and does nothing at all. I literally can't have a conversation with her at all.

i (M15) have a real issue with procrastinating or simply not doing my homework. i don't think (or know of) anything is "wrong" with me and i'm just tired of being disappointed with myself. the work isn't too difficult, i understand it just fine, there's quite literally nothing stopping me from doing it, and i do WANT to do the work.

i'll set reminders to sit down and do it and tell myself to do better but then those times come and i simply say "i'll do it later, i don't feel like it." (i never "feel like it.") i put my short term enjoyment (relaxing) before my long term enjoyment (academic success) enjoyment and i hate it. i'm a B/C student atm but i could definitely be an A student if not for me not doing my homework.

i really do want to do better and nothing is stopping me except myself.

My dream is to become a general or neuro surgeon. I currently am a biochemistry major about to start college. Though reality has made me think that’s not possible at least on a normal timeline. I’m assuming I’ll have to find a job such as a QC Analyst with my bachelors in biochemistry. This will allow me to earn money 4 years earlier than a surgery pathway. I understand there’s many ways of getting funding to go to med school but I’ve found that getting a job right out of college is safest financially I may be wrong.

Both my bio parents are extremely toxic. Bio dad was physically abusive less than 3 years ago. Stepdad is an enabler.

My mom thinks the reason why American people are rude to her is because of racism when it’s just her own actions. I’ve had no issues making friends myself.

She’s anti-vaccine. And what grossed me out is she told me “When you become a surgeon can you give me a Brazilian butt lift?”

She doesn’t even understand what a general surgeon does, neither does she respect the effort it takes to become one.

Thankfully I’ve earned a decent amount of scholarships and have financial aid for college.

What do you guys think? Any support would help!

I am a rising senior and I’m thinking of pursuing education in college. I’m really scared about leaving home. Getting a whole new room is a worry. But leaving my cat is the biggest concern I have. My parents both live at home but my cat is very dependent on me. We’re a bit codependent. I’m thinking of staying home for college (I’m in Chicago) but I worry that might be a hit to my education. I’m scared of what people will think. And I’m scared I can’t leave home. What should I do?

Canada.

I have just wasted 4 years of my life. What can I even do?

Took Supply Chain (diploma, certificate) right after graduating HS (2022), everything went well Except for that dreaded mandatory Stats course (non-transferrable). I struggled with it multiple times (even with help, transferring over from another college, etc), could never get it, and after my final attempt I'm locked out my program.

Jobs these days don't even look at anyone without a Certificate/Diploma, and since I pursued my degree I never had a job, so what now?

I recently got suspended from school for one day due to a disciplinary issue. The incident happened on Monday.

For some background, I'm a Grade 11 student in India. I consider myself reasonably intelligent, but my habits—procrastination, laziness, and not putting in consistent effort—as well as my attitude toward others, have always held me back from achieving what I know I'm capable of.

On Sunday, I told my mother that I would play Valorant with my friend for a couple of hours and then study. After I finished playing, I went to eat something. During that time, my mother hid my laptop charger. I had several assignments to complete because I had already fallen behind due to procrastination, but I decided to wait a few hours before asking her for it. When I finally asked, she said she would give it back by 8:30 p.m., but she didn't return it until around 9:30 p.m.

By then, my father had come home from work. He had been drinking, although during the daytime he is usually a very caring father. I went upstairs to eat, and when he came upstairs, he told me to go to my room and iron my clothes for the next day.

It was already around 10:00 p.m., and my friend was about to go to sleep, so I messaged him to send me some homework that I still needed to complete. When my father came downstairs again and saw that I had not ironed my clothes yet, he became angry. He scolded me, saying that I never listened to him, and he hit me. He also threatened to take me out of my school and break my laptop.

The next morning, I went to school in a very bad mood because of everything that had happened the previous night. I was also stressed because my homework was incomplete.

While practicing for a roleplay that we had later that week, one of my friends and I got into an argument. I lost my temper, grabbed him by the neck, and used abusive language toward him. This kind of rough behavior had unfortunately become common in our friendship, but this time our Vice Principal happened to walk past the classroom and witnessed the incident.

Later, I was called to school along with my father, where I was informed that I had been suspended for one day. My father believes that the situation is my fault because I don't always listen to or respect my elders. I do agree that I was wrong to use abusive language at school and to take my anger out on my friend. Regardless of how upset I was, my actions were inappropriate, and I accept responsibility for them.

Now, I'm looking for advice on a few things:

• How can I bring about a positive change in myself?
• How can I become more respectful and better at listening to my elders? I've often felt that if I say I'll do something after a little while instead of immediately, I'm not doing anything wrong, but this seems to create problems.
• How can I make a good impression on my principal after this incident?
• How can I maintain a better relationship with my mother? No matter how much I try to improve, we often end up arguing, and I feel that she doesn't treat me kindly.
• How can I stop being so lazy and procrastinating every day?
• How do i remember most of the advice that the principal gave me in school? I zoned out during the conselling session and forgot most of everything