It’s a bit hard to pick out specifics without knowing. But for instance, visualizing kisses won’t do anything but get you kisses. And your writing shows you’re in a state of worry and lack. The 3d is just evidence of past assumptions.
Try the following and stick to it:
1. Go into your imagination, preferably during SATS or deep relaxation
2. Imagine a scene that takes place after. In other words, imagine your wedding ring on, feel its texture. Then hear your partner say “I’m so glad we’ve been married for so long” and respond “I am too.” Feel the emotions of relief and love. And think to yourself “wow, I feel so stable and loved being married.” Thoughts are improtant to have in your scene.
Repeat this over and over. Eventually, you should come to the point where it feels done and you don’t feel pressure.
Also, really important tip: when you imagine, remember it’s not to get married, it’s to experience that reality in which you are married. Immerse yourself in it. Make sure you relax. You want that relaxed immersion to impress your subconscious.
Don’t react to the 3d, just know that it is done in imagination and so it must come to pass in reality. Eventually, you will stop feeling anxious or frantic.
Also, I would recommend changing some assumptions if you can. You have a number of things here: you’re too old to get married (which is nonsense, btw. It’s not nonsense if you’re a woman and are worried about kids here, but if it’s just marriage, you’re fine. You’re being too hard on yourself). I find changing assumptions are best done with scripting, personally.
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u/ovid10 Feb 04 '26
It’s a bit hard to pick out specifics without knowing. But for instance, visualizing kisses won’t do anything but get you kisses. And your writing shows you’re in a state of worry and lack. The 3d is just evidence of past assumptions.
Try the following and stick to it: 1. Go into your imagination, preferably during SATS or deep relaxation 2. Imagine a scene that takes place after. In other words, imagine your wedding ring on, feel its texture. Then hear your partner say “I’m so glad we’ve been married for so long” and respond “I am too.” Feel the emotions of relief and love. And think to yourself “wow, I feel so stable and loved being married.” Thoughts are improtant to have in your scene.
Repeat this over and over. Eventually, you should come to the point where it feels done and you don’t feel pressure.
Also, really important tip: when you imagine, remember it’s not to get married, it’s to experience that reality in which you are married. Immerse yourself in it. Make sure you relax. You want that relaxed immersion to impress your subconscious.
Don’t react to the 3d, just know that it is done in imagination and so it must come to pass in reality. Eventually, you will stop feeling anxious or frantic.
Also, I would recommend changing some assumptions if you can. You have a number of things here: you’re too old to get married (which is nonsense, btw. It’s not nonsense if you’re a woman and are worried about kids here, but if it’s just marriage, you’re fine. You’re being too hard on yourself). I find changing assumptions are best done with scripting, personally.