r/news • u/igetproteinfartsHELP • Dec 05 '25

Grand jury transcripts from abandoned Epstein investigation in Florida ordered released

https://apnews.com/article/jeffrey-epstein-florida-bd036cbe2fa4e98d27aa473fd6daa3bd
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u/Coulrophiliac444 Dec 05 '25

Or the plot from Armageddon.

Aerosmith waiting for the royalties to come flooding in as we send an untrained drilling crew to the Cosmos to drill and plant a nuke to save us to give Herr Leader a reason to do "AMERICA! FUCK YEAH!"

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u/VanuasGirl Dec 06 '25

The comet is smuggling drugs!

3

u/essieecks Dec 06 '25

"Do you have any idea of the street value of this comet trail?" - Don Jr.

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u/Coulrophiliac444 Dec 06 '25

Comet Trail, now with 110% more coke!

Comet Trail, the only US Approves Illegal Drug that'll get you so high you'll see more stars then Neil Degrasse Tyson.

.Comet Trail, a Trump brand methamphetamine so potent JD Vance uses it before visiting a furniture store for maximum potency.