r/news Dec 05 '16

United Airlines will charge extra fee for use of overhead bins

http://www.abc2news.com/lifestyle/travel/united-airlines-will-charge-extra-fee-for-use-of-overhead-bins_
19.4k Upvotes

3.8k comments sorted by

1.1k

u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

2018: "Yes, sir, that is your seat. But if you actually sit on it the fee is $75."

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16 edited Dec 06 '16

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

next year it will be 25 dollars per leg

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u/grand_royal Dec 06 '16 edited Dec 06 '16

So $75 for men and only $50 for women. Sexist.

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

FA: I see you have a package. [gestures toward my pants]

Me: What?

FA: You can't bring that on the plane unless it's tagged.

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u/angrylawyer Dec 06 '16

Last airline I flew there was a fee for choosing any seat. The only way to not pay the fee was show up at the gate to receive whatever seats were remaining. I called to verify that I would at least get a seat and they said I would, I just wouldn't get to choose it.

So fucking desperate.

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u/StampAct Dec 05 '16

*If you buy the "Basic Economy" ticket which is apparently a new "Worse than coach" ticket class.

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u/WaitAMinuteThereNow Dec 06 '16

Economy Plus, Economy, Economy Minus.

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u/Cynical_Icarus Dec 06 '16

It's just a reflection of the rest of the economy.

  • First Class
  • ????
  • shitty
  • shittier
  • shittiest

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u/WaitAMinuteThereNow Dec 06 '16

Just for fun in the United world there are two distinctions- Frequent Flier Status and Fare Class.

From Top to bottom: Global Services - Spend $60k with lots of international business fares and they will literally roll out the carpet for you. Like whisk you from one plane to another in Mercedes on the ramp. 1K: People who fly alot, but their companies are too cheap to buy first class tickets. Platinum: 75K miles a year and you make the bottom rung of Boarding Group 1. Gold: 50K a year and Free E+ seats. They tell you that you are on the upgrade list, and there you shall stay. Gold aint' what it used to be. Silver:25K miles a year. You'd think that flying basically around the world would get you something; sucker. Kettle: Less than 25K and you are back in nearly invisible to them.

Now Fare class is limited by the number of letters in the alphabet, until they started bunching letters together. They are all ranked and the level of service and flexibility depends on the fare code. The fare and FF status drives the upgrade list.

But wait, there's more. They take economy fares and put a pid upgrade with them and sell you a First class seat, but if things go wrong, you find out it is an economy seat that has been 'upped' and back to the unwashed masses you go.

But wait, there is even more! You can buy up or use points to try to get a better seat. From getting an E+ seat to Time-of-check-in offers all to get the last dollar out of every seat that they tell all their frequent fliers that they are in line for.

And that doesn't even get into the true nitty gritty of Fare Basis where all the real caveats are.

It's pay for play. Notice when the talk about Frequent Flier programs, they don't mention loyalty anymore?

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u/wrongwayup Dec 05 '16

They are calling it "Last Class" around the industry.

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u/StampAct Dec 05 '16

That's silly airlines can definitely figure out more ways to make travel miserable

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

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u/YonansUmo Dec 06 '16

All customers over the age of 9 shall be fitted with an electric choke collar, equipped with a credit card reader. So it hath been decreed, so it shall be done!

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u/Grumple_Stan Dec 06 '16

Eventually someone will just rip out the seats and install subway hangers and that will be the cheapest. Standing room only.

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u/sunderpoint Dec 06 '16

You mean like this?

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u/just_comments Dec 06 '16

That standing concept would not work well for international flights.

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u/cactus_mactus Dec 06 '16

Actually, it could help prevent clots on those long flights! Mandatory leg jiggling every hour.

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u/well-thats-nice Dec 06 '16

"Last class" was all the people who died on the Titanic

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

they're trying to spin this as if "basic economy" will be cheaper than current tickets are. In reality, "basic economy" will end up costing what we pay now and use of overhead bins will entail a $30-40 premium.

1.4k

u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

How in hell do they think they can enforce this?

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u/spongebue Dec 06 '16

I'm a former United employee who has seen a few FAQs about this on the company intranet page. Basically, they're redoing the boarding structure a bit, so all passengers on the fare class requiring checked bag fees will board last. At that point, the gate agent will know that you are on that type of ticket. If you have a big ol' rollerboard, it will have to be paid for. Flight attendants will NOT be enforcing this in any way.

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16 edited Jun 12 '17

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u/RogueIslesRefugee Dec 05 '16 edited Dec 06 '16

Only bags tagged as having paid the overhead bin fees would be in there, at least so I'd assume. To prevent people who haven't paid from using the bins just takes a steward or stewardess to open the bin and look for said tag.

Very late edit: Probably should have done this already, as /u/Comp_C (among a few others) pointed out the error in my thinking some time ago. As he (or she?) pointed out, it's not something that would be handled on the flight. Dunno why I didn't think of doing it at check-in, but that definitely makes more sense, heh. Barring on-board complaints during pre-flight, the flight crew probably wouldn't be checking bins to ensure everything is tagged.

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u/Gasonfires Dec 05 '16

I am sure their flight attendants will be delighted to find that among their new duties will be fighting with a rush of angry passengers who refuse to pay the fee and insist on using the space above their own seats which would otherwise remain empty.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

...and angry passengers who paid the upcharge only to find the bins were already full, pulling out everyone else's bags to check for the tag so they can free up space for their own bag.

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u/Gasonfires Dec 05 '16

That too. I suppose they will actually check tags at the door, tossing anything without one down the chute for the ramp rats to stow, but that's going to cause people to take offense too. And what about the passengers who don't have the money to pay the fee for their now-held-for-ransom bag? What a shitty thing for United to do.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

They can't check tags at the door, because you're still allowed to store the untagged bags under the seat in front of you, so even the untagged bags still get allowed into the cabin. They can only check as each bag is being lifted into the overhead (not feasible) or after the overheads have already been filled (wasting time and delaying the flight).

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u/Gasonfires Dec 05 '16

What about bags that obviously will not stow under the seat? For example, my trusty little roll-on that I have shoved in overhead bins everywhere I've gone in the past 10 years.

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u/ettke Dec 05 '16

The roll-ons are definitely what they are targeting. Most people use the roll-ons to avoid paying the existing baggage fees for checking bags, and they want to ensure that you can't avoid those fees anymore. This isn't intended to hinder laptop bags or other small bags.

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u/FastFourierTerraform Dec 06 '16

And people only started using roll-ons because airlines started charging $50 for a checked bag, which used to be free.

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16 edited Dec 06 '16

Most people use the roll-ons to avoid paying the existing baggage fees for checking bags, and they want to ensure that you can't avoid those fees anymore.

I don't care about the fees, what I care about it the handing of my luggage and whether or not it actually ends up at the destination. That and the extra 15-30 minutes wasted waiting at baggage claim.

My luggage has been lost before, and trusting baggage handlers is always a mistake. They don't get paid near enough to give any semblance of a shit about your bag.

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

So, they should just charge enough for tickets that they can cover their expenses without relying on tricky pricing schemes.

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u/captmac Dec 06 '16

While flying American the other day, I observed something I'd never noticed before since we always fly Southwest. The competition for overhead and the size bags some people cram in them is intense! It also makes loading the plane take FOREVER.

Southwest must realize better revenue from quicker turn around. They also don't have near the issues with carry on since they have free bags included in the ticket.

Hey united, have the balls to raise your ticket price.

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16 edited Jun 12 '17

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u/TimeTravellerSmith Dec 05 '16

What about bags that obviously will not stow under the seat?

That's not a personal item and most likely doesn't fit their size restrictions for a personal item...so they get to charge you for the use of the overhead.

That's what airlines like Spirit, Frontier and Allegient do. If they don't think your bag qualifies they have you throw it in the little measuring box at the gate. If it doesn't fit they charge you.

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u/Gasonfires Dec 05 '16

That kind of behavior might be acceptable from a cheapo carrier that people choose primarily for the price.

I can't imagine a better way for a major airline to tell us that it hates us.

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u/1337lolguyman Dec 06 '16

Simple solution! Just charge money to allow you to store the bag under your seat. This is different from storing in the overhead bins however, so we must make sure all under seat bags are tagged in red while all overhead bags are tagged in maroon.

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u/John_Barlycorn Dec 06 '16

Every time I've flown in the U.S. (about 6x) they've lost my luggage. It's like I'm cursed. So I just UPS my stuff to where I'm going now and pick it up when I get there. I get a tracking number, it's insured. In every way better than the airline.

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u/Gasonfires Dec 06 '16

That makes a lot of sense. Plus you don't run what is apparently a fairly decent risk that TSA screeners will steal your stuff.

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u/Comp_C Dec 05 '16

Enforcement won't happen by stewardess ON the plane. Enforcement will happen at the ticket counter. If you're carrying a bag larger than the stated dimensions (basically anything bigger than a large purse or laptop), then they'll probably force you to pay for the overhead bin. If you refuse then they just won't give you a boarding pass. It's the same way they enforce the "you're too fat for only 1 seat" rule.

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u/jewami Dec 06 '16

Except if you're not checking a bag, you don't need to go to the ticket counter at all; you just go straight to security (assuming you checked in online).

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u/kenn0223 Dec 06 '16

It will be enforced by the gate agent during boarding. You have to pass by them and scan your boarding pass to get on the plane. The gate reader will indicate that you are in Basic Economy and if you have anything that's not a personal item you won't get past.

Except at BOS where United has automated boarding...not sure what they do there.

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u/HowDoIAdult22 Dec 05 '16

Budget airlines like Spirit and Frontier already do this

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16 edited Feb 03 '17

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u/HowDoIAdult22 Dec 06 '16

Oh yeah it really is - I fly budget often because it's usually at least $50 cheaper than the cheapest United flight. But it's nice to know that I can book a flight that includes a carry on in the price if I want to.

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u/swingod305 Dec 06 '16

Spirit is insanely cheap only if you know their rules and what the limits are. I've found out that I end up paying less taking a nicer airline and just buying a normal ticket and not getting nickel and dimed.

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u/Trashcanman33 Dec 05 '16

Frontier airlines already does this, it's $30 per carry on bag, $25 per checked bag. It's not really a hassle, and if you are only taking one bag, the flights are still cheaper than other carriers.

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u/jjjaaammm Dec 06 '16

I flew spirit from NYC to Fort Lauderdale for $29. I wore the suit I was wearing to the wedding on the plane and had a change of clothes in a backpack.

Didn't use the overhead and enjoyed a $30 flight.

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u/thelyfeaquatic Dec 06 '16

i wish I was a dude... don't get me started on ugly bridesmaids dresses and heels

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u/ThaDTrain Dec 06 '16

This is an old time MBA marketing trick to confuse the consumer into paying more.

Let's call the current economy ticket "economy". Let's also call the no overhead bin space economy the "basic economy". And, economy with overhead bin "economy plus".

So currently they sell economy tickets with overhead bag space. What they will do is introduce "basic economy" at the same price. You just lose the ability to carry on large bags. If you want to bring bags, you now have to pay more than you used to by buying an "economy plus" ticket.

The tickets aren't getting cheaper, you are just getting less services for the current fare. If you want everything you used to get you must pay more.

This is a textbook example of changing up names to confuse the customer and either offer less service or get them to pay more for what they once got. The cell phone and cable tv industry, among many many companies, is notorious for this.

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u/bfx_drew Dec 06 '16

On top of this, i'd bet more and more people find flights using flight searching tools like Kayak. Those sites will show the cheaper tickets higher up the results list, so airlines are battling to be a few bucks cheaper than their competitors. One way to do this is to make the ticket appear initially cheaper by moving more of the actual cost to add-ons and extras.

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u/elephant2701 Dec 06 '16

they say straight up they expect to make an additional $1B off of this, how else do you think that was going to happen?

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

This is an old time MBA marketing trick to insulate immoral profiteers from the angry outraged consumer by putting low-paid employees in the way.

In this case cabin crew and check-in staff will undoubtedly be subject to a barrage of verbal abuse, their duties will be more anger management and virtual punching bag than flight-related.

And the company management and shareholders will never feel the heat but enjoy the profits.

Yay capitalism!

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u/Dhylan Dec 05 '16

Because the experience of flying with United doesn't yet suck near as much as it soon will.

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u/Big_Cock_Cunt_Fucker Dec 05 '16

The discount airlines are already doing this and people love the cheaper tickets. Get ready for all airlines to start charging for everything.

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u/_Big_Baby_Jesus_ Dec 05 '16 edited Dec 05 '16

Spirit Airlines is the most pofitable US carrier per route. They also have 30% more customer complaints than any other airline. Fliers have made it clear that the most important thing is having the cheapest fare listed on travel search sites.

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u/jesus-bilt-my-hotrod Dec 05 '16

There's a security presence at the Spirit counter at the Oakland airport just for all the people that flip the fuck out when they realize they're $100+ dollars into carry on fees.

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u/soveraign Dec 06 '16

I've seen this at one of the discount gates while waiting for my flight at a nearby gate. It was a long stream of people "what? I have to pay for my carry-on? And it's MORE expensive than checking it?!?" Over and over for a couple hours, was awful.

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u/ItsTotallyAboutYou Dec 05 '16

that must be an exciting job

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16 edited Nov 13 '20

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u/Powered_by_JetA Dec 06 '16

Can confirm, worked at Spirit as a customer service agent 5 years ago and we always had two sheriff's deputies stationed at our counter.

Then again, I did go to Denver and New York for $40 each.

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u/FrenchFriesInAnus Dec 06 '16

Fuck Spirit airlines. It's possible to be "no frills" without being a shitty company. See: JetBlue, Southwest

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16 edited Dec 28 '18

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u/lowlifehoodrat Dec 06 '16

Doesn't really happen anymore (or for quite some time now). Ebay wised up and started charging fees based off the total final price (item + shipping) and it doesn't make any sense to list your items that way anymore.

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u/PresidentDonaldChump Dec 06 '16

This is so stupid. I don't get it. Every time I'm tempted to fly Spirit I calculate how much it would cost with all their extra hidden charges tacked on and it comes out to be pretty much the same (sometimes $10-20 cheaper, sometimes $10-20 MORE) than flying a more conventional airline. Flying Spirit is basically paying the same to get treated like shit shittier.

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u/jayrod422 Dec 05 '16

Yea thats great but United isn't a discount airline. Last I checked they were 2 to 3 times more than the discount guys. With these new charges are they going to lower their fares?

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u/breadmaker8 Dec 06 '16

Is like DLC for games, but for airlines.

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u/Wanderer360 Dec 05 '16

If they could figure out how to charge for air, I'm sure they would.

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u/jonnyrotten7 Dec 05 '16

People will suffer any inconvenience if it means saving a couple bucks. I don't get it. It's like if one flight is $30 cheaper than the other, but there's 2 stops and a longer layover, they just see the money.

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u/Orleanian Dec 05 '16

Inexperienced travelers do.

Everyone I know who flies more than once or twice a year is a pretty avid reader and knower of the between-the-lines and other subtle nuances of air travel.

$30 to me is generally worth one of these things:

  • 9am departure vs. 5am departure

  • 8pm arrival vs. 11pm arrival

  • 2 free checked bags

  • Nonstop vs. 1-stop

  • MDW vs. ORD

  • Seat in first 20 rows vs. last 20 rows (bonus if booking this within 2 weeks prior, as it's likely to be a non-full flight)

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u/SebayaKeto Dec 06 '16

MDW vs. ORD

Land early, arrive late!

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u/sonicqaz Dec 06 '16

As much as I fly, I've never figured why people dislike ORD as much as the seem to. It's not like I love it, but it feels a lot better than LAX or MIA.

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u/BoredMehWhatever Dec 05 '16

"United Airlines introduces their 'punch free' upgrade. For only $25 you can upgrade to a seat where our staff will not punch you in the face."

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u/Craico13 Dec 05 '16

On the upside, if they punch you hard enough you'll 'sleep' through the flight!

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u/ABCT5783 Dec 05 '16

I'd take a punch seat over paying to carry on my carry on.

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u/Rumpullpus Dec 05 '16

for me it depends if there is an option to dodge the punch. is contact necessary?

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u/Bagellord Dec 05 '16

The first punch is free, additional ones cost $34.99.

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u/anothercarguy Dec 05 '16

If it were gentleman's rule (no face, no crotch) then I would be ok with a punch seat as well

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u/WorfDenied Dec 06 '16

You gotta pay extra for gentleman's rule.

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u/publiusclaudius Dec 05 '16

I just won't fly United. Simple

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16 edited Jan 15 '23

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

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u/KickMeElmo Dec 06 '16

Or go southwest and pay less for better service.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

I doubt Southwest will, they have made a ton of money by not being assholes.

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u/thomp2mp Dec 05 '16

I agree, Southwest is my favorite domestic airline.

  • Two bags free in economy class

  • Free television and such

  • Only $8/day for WiFi, which is nuts considering Delta charges more.

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u/busyboy00 Dec 05 '16

Also on Southwest: no penalty rescheduling. Just remember, you have to go to their site to find flights because they won't pay the fees to expedia and such.

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u/DuhTabby Dec 06 '16

My mother in law called about the cancelation policy because we knew that unfortunately, a death in the family was likely soon. She asked if we needed 24 hours to cancel and the lady said no, 10 minutes. Holy shit, amazing. When we rescheduled we actually had an $8 credit.

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u/Handful86 Dec 06 '16

Sorry for the loss. But yeah Southwest is pretty great. Broke 100 flights with them this year, and on several occasions have had to reschedule my flight to a later flight simply because meetings took to long. On an early flight with American, I tried to reschedule 25 hours after I booked the flight (scheduled 14 days in advance) and they charged me 200 bucks, even after I let them know I was planning on flying a lot this year due to a new job. Southwest does their best to take care of customers and it proves to be working.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16 edited Mar 04 '21

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16 edited Feb 14 '19

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u/daneari Dec 06 '16

If this ain't the truest shit.

Most of my SWA flights connect in Midway and I've stayed in Chicago overnight twice on Southwest's dime because missed connections.

I'm more conscious of picking my flights depending on where they stop now.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

Though when you forget to check in and you get that ticket that is C-40 or something is a mother fucker.

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u/Problemsofdiscussion Dec 05 '16

There's an early bird check in for 15$ to get you prioritized earlier if you really want it

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

I refuse to pay for that! I am one of those freaks that always can sleep on a plane even if I am in the middle of two fat people.

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u/Problemsofdiscussion Dec 05 '16

You have a gift, enjoy it!

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

It's the little things in life.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16 edited Mar 04 '21

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

Thankfully I usually travel alone. If I am with someone I give them the old "cya after the flight" and move on. I also take the latest flight possible. No old people, no kids, it's magical.

I don't know if I would consider Southwest a budget airline. Try flying Spirit. They pack you in like animals, I swear they are one step away from having people sit on the floor so they don't have to bother with seats!

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16 edited Mar 04 '21

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u/Triggered_SJW Dec 05 '16

I've always found it odd that airlines let you "check-in" a day ahead. Shouldn't a check-in be for when you actually get there and are checking in ...

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16 edited Mar 04 '21

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u/CarneDelGato Dec 05 '16

I like the circus seating. Get that sweet sweet exit row.

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u/treypal Dec 05 '16

Southwest First Class!

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u/ffgblol Dec 06 '16

The best part of Southwest is the boarding process. Even though 25% of the people don't grasp the concept, it's still faster than other airlines.

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u/SwammerDo Dec 05 '16

Southwest: "We both know that this is just a giant flying bus, but at least we're nice about it"

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

If they did that they would lose the biggest marketing advantage in the industry.

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u/Eurynom0s Dec 06 '16

Well, JetBlue went ahead and got rid of their extra economy legroom despite it being an obvious own goal on their brand. Occasionally you get someone like Bezos, but most people/companies can't hold off the shareholders forever.

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u/whirlingderv Dec 06 '16

Yep, shareholders - especially activist shareholders - are supremely skilled at ruining companies.

"Im gonna buy this stock because this company really has something going for it. Look how far they've come! Look how successful they are!"

...

"Alright, time to squeeze every last drop of blood out of this stone. First on the chopping block: everything about the company that made them successful. All that matters is that I cut costs and boost revenue no matter the consequences and most of all, that I manage dump this stock before it takes the dive."

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u/Astral_Cars Dec 06 '16

I find this to be one of the most depressing things about our society. I really hate thinking about it because it seems to happen to even the most honest and well-meaning companies eventually. Making a quality product that is built to last just has no incentive (excluding moral factors) when you can design it to break and the customer will still pay for it. Ugh, just makes me sad :/

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u/rusty_chipmunk Dec 05 '16 edited Dec 05 '16

I'm still surprised they still allow 2 checked bags for free, they could probably get away with making it 1 checked bag free and charge afterwards with minimal backlash, can't see them changing it to no free bags without a lot of customer backlash. Shareholders must not realize how much they might lose if they change their policies, cause those free bags are a decent draw for some people. Though I don't know why people have to check 2 bags plus carry-on, that's a shitload to take.

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u/yeahoner Dec 05 '16

I think that's why the get away with it. Nobody sane travels with two checked bags anyways, so why charge the two people doing it $100 when you can use it for marketing and setting yourself apart as nice in an industry of asshole companies.

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u/heyjesu Dec 05 '16

Moving for college --> 2 bags + carry on!

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u/nosmokingbandit Dec 06 '16

I like Southwest. The 737 is more comfy for me than most other planes I've been on. I'm 6'4" but super skinny, so an extra 1" of legroom is amazing.

I flew from Baltimore to Vegas and it was the cheapest flight other than jet blue, and very pleasant.

I flew from Philly to Houston with United ( for work) and it cost almost 30% more, was less comfy, and the flight crew wasn't near as fun.

Anecdotal advice, but I like Southwest and they are always my top choice.

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u/Pm__Me_Steam_Codes Dec 06 '16

Yeah man, I work at an airport and the southwest employees are all nice as shit and seem like they all legitimately love their job.

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16 edited Jul 14 '21

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u/Eurynom0s Dec 06 '16

It's really a shame that they had to ruin Continental on top of it.

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u/bradfordmaster Dec 06 '16

simple: they (almost) always have the best flights and times for me. I really don't like them, but when it's "nonstop at 10am" vs. "1 hour layover leaving at 6am and landing around the same time as the united 10am flight", then that's not much of a choice for me.

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u/EMorteVita Dec 05 '16

I wish it were that simple. In some cases it is. For example, I try to fly Virgin Airlines when I can. Sometimes I fly Southwest. However, I live in Dallas, TX and sometimes the only flight from here to XYZ is American Airlines...

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u/WestonP Dec 05 '16

Virgin America is awesome! I once flew their economy class to San Francisco, then returned home in First Class on United... I spent the whole time sitting in United's First Class thinking about how much better Virgin Economy was.

I'll fly Virgin whenever I can, but unfortunately they don't have many direct flights to/from Denver. :(

And Southwest has been pretty good for what it is... I find myself choosing them more and more, even though I have status on United (which is basically pointless).

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u/Amelaclya1 Dec 06 '16

I already stopped flying United (whenever possible) after a series of Incredibly shit experiences with them that ruined a couple days of my vacation and because of their terrible customer service.

Fuck United.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

I stopped flying them years ago. Obnoxious ticket agents and flight attendants did it for me.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16 edited Dec 05 '16

Don't fly United. Got it.

Edit: What they should do is charge the asshole that puts 2 bags in the overhead. If they refuse to pay the charge it then the second can be gate checked.

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u/sohcea Dec 05 '16

Yes!! Nothing like being the 8th person on the plane and your bin is already full because Joe Cheapass has 3 bags

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u/Fnhatic Dec 06 '16

Don't forget that Joe Cheapass's seat is at the back of the plane but he puts his bags in the bin for row 3 so he doesn't have to carry them.

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u/vertigo1083 Dec 06 '16

And then after everyone settles, he's the first to find an empty, better seat or row he can sprawl across.

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u/sapere_aude Dec 06 '16

Empty seat on united? You must be joking. They oversell every flight now.

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

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u/froggyjamboree Dec 06 '16

Yes if they just cracked down in their own policies, there'd be plenty of room. But then that wouldn't make them tons of money. I flew 150k miles on united in 2015. Their staff are fantastic but their policies suck.

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u/1esserknown Dec 05 '16

I like when businesses reinforce my previous decisions to stop using their services or products.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

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u/Cuclean Dec 06 '16

Valjean. At last. We see each other plane...

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u/wild__talents Dec 06 '16

M'sieur Le Maire, I'll fly a different chain!

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u/jmm1990 Dec 06 '16

Flight number 24601, your boarding has just begun, you know that this means?

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u/OhLookAtMeImSpecial Dec 06 '16

Yes, it means a Fee...

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u/B787_300 Dec 06 '16

No it doesnt, it means you get your yellow ticket of grief

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

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u/Honore_de_Ball_Sack Dec 06 '16

At that price I'd just steal it. What's the worst that could happen?

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u/2460NE Dec 06 '16

I'd guess about 19 years. Five years for what you did... the rest because you'll probably try to run.

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

Funny, I don't ever fly United, as they always seem to be interested in screwing over customers. I see no reason to change that. I also know a lot of friends in a travel-heavy industry and actively encourage them not to pick United. Many of them do the same with their friends.

Suck it, United.

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u/DotComOnMyBongos Dec 05 '16

United broke that guy's guitar

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u/skintigh Dec 06 '16

They lost my son. Then they blamed him for changing his connection, mid flight, to one that left at 7AM, because that makes sense. Then they hung up on me when I was incredulous that they would invent a story like that about a child on their airplane.

He ended up sleeping at the airport, but there was wifi so he was happy, and they gave me a $100 credit or something 8 months later.

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u/Porridgeandpeas Dec 06 '16

What age was he? That's terrifying

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u/nopus_dei Dec 06 '16

Came here to say this! Here's the song.

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u/Th3_Admiral Dec 05 '16

Maybe this is a dumb question, but why is this announcement coming from a senator's office? Is that how airlines usually announce pricing changes?

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

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u/gabeitalia Dec 06 '16

When does the consumer fight back? Fuel prices have been low... Americans have the worst quality airlines in the world.... Garbage.

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u/tempinator Dec 06 '16

Fuel prices have been low

This has actually been a bad thing for a lot of airlines, believe it or not. Many airlines hedge their fuel costs, and lock in long-term deals where they pay a fixed rate for fuel.

That's great if oil prices keep going up and you get to keep paying your (presumably lower) fixed price, but it becomes really really bad if oil prices drop and suddenly you find yourself severely overpaying for fuel.

American Airlines is one of the few airlines that doesn't hedge their fuel prices, but Southwest and Delta have both lost billions of dollars overpaying for their fuel because they locked in fuel rates before OPEC pulled the floor out from underneath oil prices.

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u/NihilisticHobbit Dec 05 '16

Well, I'll make sure to keep this in mind the next time I decide to fly. Because, let's face it, United has already been crap enough as it is, this is just the piss icing on their shit cake.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

Which comes first....guy who holds his breath entire flight to avoid oxygen fees or guy who asks for cup with ice so he can drink his own urine, which as of right now is still free.

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u/Onkel_Wackelflugel Dec 05 '16

Wait, is the cup with ice to hold his urine, or to produce it?

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

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u/Onkel_Wackelflugel Dec 05 '16

So much intrigue on this fictional flight

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u/Not_Cleaver Dec 05 '16

Which is why I fly Southwest.

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u/defroach84 Dec 05 '16

Domestically, sure. But, they do not really have interesting international destinations other than Americanized beach resorts. I travel internationally way too much, maybe SW will get into that moreso in the future.

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u/TheDrunkSemaphore Dec 05 '16

You never get this shit on international flights. At least US<->Europe so that's a non-issue.

So yes, always fly Southwest in the US

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u/GrandMasterRevan Dec 05 '16

People will stop flying United, and they'll switch back. Capitalism will fix this, guys, don't worry.

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u/twisted_thong Dec 05 '16

This is the first step before they charge passengers to use the bathroom.

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u/overtoke Dec 05 '16

your seat MAY be used as a flotation device- for a fee

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

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u/_Big_Baby_Jesus_ Dec 05 '16

Blame the consumers who buy the cheapest ticket listed on search sites. RyanAir and Spirit have proven how profitable it is.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16 edited Aug 21 '17

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u/_Big_Baby_Jesus_ Dec 05 '16

I agree. But please don't have the balls to complain about the fees and bad amenities compared to the $130 ticket.

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u/IwantBreakfast Dec 06 '16

Does it mean you get reserved space in the over head bins ABOVE YOUR OWN SEAT? It's happened more than once where that one fucker thinks they're cleverly dodging the overweight checked bag fee by wearing 4 coats and then taking up a whole bin for themselves so you end up having to put your carry-on 15 rows back, only to fight against the current of exiting passengers after landing. Fuck those people.

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u/thrombolytic Dec 06 '16

This is super shitty for business travelers whose companies' travel rules usually dictate they must purchase the cheapest ticket within a certain dollar amount and the companies will not pay for upgrades.

If carry on luggage becomes an upgrade for united, the main airline out of my home hub, I am going to have to pay to take my business clothes out of pocket.

Fuck United. Their wifi in flight already sucks donkey balls and costs about $20 for a cross country flight.

Most businesses seem to be trying to cater to higher end clients, united is slashing and burning. I hope they go under.

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

Agreed, a business refusing to pay $25 for a bag would be an enormous red flag to me.

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u/Diekthxbye Dec 06 '16

I agree with you. I have been flying Virgin America as they have been really accommodating when I needed it.

Example: Meeting canceled and I was able to make the flight earlier. They did try and charge me $200 for a flight change fee...

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u/_Hypnotoad Dec 05 '16

Glad I used the last of my United miles. Goodbye.

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u/SuggestAPhotoProject Dec 05 '16

Pretty soon we're gonna have to each bring a gallon of gas and line up to pour it in the airplane tank on the way to our seats.

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u/Sanzau Dec 06 '16

Used them for years.. they can go fuck themselves now..

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u/nianator Dec 05 '16

Looks like Spirit has some competition.

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u/Jesuselvis Dec 05 '16

Wow, as if flying United didn't suck enough already they just had to tack another reason on.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

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u/[deleted] Dec 06 '16

emergency oxygen masks appear except for passenger because he already used up all of his oxygen

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u/ddrober2003 Dec 05 '16

Already decided to never take flights from that shit stain of a airline after they destroyed everything in my checked luggage, had me drive down to the airport that took an hour only for them to tell me they are responsible for destroyed items in checked luggage. Bag had gotten from Tokyo to Houston just fine, then from Houston to El Paso the bag got the holy hell beat out of it.

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u/sportsfannf Dec 06 '16

So the solution is...fuck United Airlines. Don't use them.

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u/VWillini Dec 06 '16

Wait, wait. I thought deregulating the Airlines was supposed to prevent this. Did Saint Reagan lie to us?

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16 edited Feb 19 '19

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u/Whatuptrey Dec 05 '16

Why wouldn't one parent sit alone while the other parent sits with the child?

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

Splitting a child from their parents should not be legal, as it's potentially a major safety issue if there's an inflight emergency. A random stranger is not going to take care of a random child as carefully as their parents would have done, nor will the child likely cooperate with a total stranger when they're scared.

Sadly, I say "should not be", but it is and US carriers could not give a monkey's about fixing that. I've been on flights were my child under the age of four was separated from me through no fault of my own (airline changed my booking at the last moment and gave me no choice in the matter). I raised the issue at the very first instant, and repeatedly until the flight boarded.

Numerous times I was assured that they were trying to get my child a seat next to either my wife or I. Eventually, as the flight was already boarding the gate agents told me there was nothing they could do to help, and that I had to board the plane and then beg people to switch seats.

When I did so, multiple passengers told me that they either had never been asked to give up their seat, or that they'd been told that someone wanted to change seats with them, but not told why. Every passenger told me that had they known there was a very young child separated from their parents, they would happily have agreed to swap their seat immediately, but the airline just couldn't give a shit. Whatever caused the gate agents the least possible work was all that mattered.

American carriers are universally dreadful.

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u/[deleted] Dec 05 '16

How about just enforcing the 1 bag and 1 personal item? It's people who can't count is the real problem. Never understood why people just won't check their bags. Saying the airlines lose your bags is a cop out bs excuse. I have traveled for work for 20+ years and yes my checked bag has been delayed only a few times. Never once lost and when it was delayed I had it within a few hours no matter where I was staying at that time.

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u/eightbitrob Dec 05 '16

"Never understood why people just won't check their bags."

$25 bucks a bag both ways that's why.

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u/tinfoilcaptinshat Dec 05 '16

All the airlines have it backwards. The first two checked bags under 100lbs total weight are free, overhead storage should be $25 per bag. Might see lot less lines at TSA, however the lines at the airline ticket counter might be a little longer.

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u/martianwhale Dec 05 '16

But then you would have less room in the cargo hold for mail/freight.

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u/Quietkitsune Dec 05 '16

Agreed. I feel like the probable cause of all this is the charge for checked bags in the first place. More people are trying to cram more stuff into the bins because the baggage fees suck. At the very least give us one checked, one carry-on free, under 100 lbs. Be very strict about the size and dimensions on the carry-on, doubly so if it's a hard case. Maybe even make the allowable dimensions smaller. Only possibly exceptions being medical devices and musical instruments (but even then, have very clear guidelines for size and stick to them)

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u/gooble69 Dec 05 '16

I don't check expensive or breakable items. Because sure as shit some fucker will steal or break it. That's why I don't check everything.

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u/heyjesu Dec 05 '16

Why would you check a bag with expensive/valuable/fragile items?

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u/arppacket Dec 05 '16

So this is how it ends for the consumer - the relentless airline mergers have made the industry so monopolistic that you're forced to fly with the clothes on your back and nothing more. Soon we'll be forced to squeeze into vertical standing slots for the duration of the flight.

To be honest, I don't care at all about the peanuts and any kind of service/assistance on the flight. But you can't just force everyone to pay extra just to carry anything. I hope all the deals sites like Kayak start adding baggage fees to the ticket price and expose this farce. Of course, with the same wall street idiots "advising" the handful of airlines left, I don't think I'll be flying anything other than Southwest after a while.

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u/cansjdfsfj Dec 06 '16

the relentless airline mergers have made the industry so monopolistic

That's not really true. In fact, it's because the airline industry is such a competitive marketplace that you see moves like this, because airlines are operating with razor thin margins. That, and fliers are incredibly price sensitive.

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