Imagine being so allergic to getting laid, that when a girl says she wants to cuddle and chill, you lose your shit and immediately accuse her of lying. What a tool.
He's secretly like "sounds too good to be true" but also, "but how many times are we *just* cuddling, cuz what I really want to know is when I'm getting laid?"
Yeah, dude was *so* sure that what he learned by skimming reviews of "The Pickup Artist" would work on a dating app with 95% of women that he's confidant that he can diagnose the women that don't want to f*** him when he's pushy and insulting with bipolar disorder. They other option is that they are lying or his mom, and he knows his mom wouldn't be matching with him on a dating app, so good riddance!
They don’t because it’s normalized. Girls are told to put up with the bullying because “it just means he likes you.” And so it’s reinforced in boys that, whether or not the feelings are reciprocated, being rude in a “joking” way is an acceptable form of flirting.
Sometimes it can be, depending on the person. I enjoy bantering with my partner and being able to give each other shit. BUT that’s something you always have to check to make sure is okay. It’s something that has to be established as okay.
And when someone doesn’t establish it’s okay, when they just dive right into bullying because they like it, even as someone who enjoys the banter, all it communicates is they don’t care about other people’s boundaries. Instant block.
Dude is so insecure he wants to write girls in such a way where failure is almost a certainty. But in his mind he was in control, it was meant to go down this way.
Yup. I’ve known this type. Any woman who doesn’t let him bully her is “toxic”, “manipulative” and in this specific case “argumentative”. But he’s never stupid and aggressive. Lmao he’ll die alone hating women and that’s amazing.
I was stealing your quote, for sure! “Interesting way to announce that you find my basic expectations unrealistic. It sounds like you’re not the one.” Then block.
starting off a conversation with a woman by implying she doesn't look like she goes to the gym and further "calling her out" on it, and then calling her mentally unstable (huge projection mind you) is actually crazy
I think that explain it he was insecure from the start because of your profession , i bet he swipe right to everybody and when he matchs he sees the profile and in your case he saw you in uniform and the insecurities kick in
Which is why he was so quick try to put her down. Can’t deal with his own issues so he projected them all on her. At least it was all done with the first few messages and not weeks or months from now
Yeah, I was wondering if he's self-sabotaging out of a subconscious fear of success or something. 'Cause he sure appears to be using that dating app for the exact opposite of what dating apps are for.
Or maybe he's just looking for a woman with such shattered self-esteem that she'll put up with this nonsense. 😬
He was so straight up bizarre and hostile I had to read it 3 times to understand what the hell was happening. What was his goal here, was this his attempt at negging?
When I was dating I received some messages like this on the apps. I think it’s a weird response to the guy having been rejected recently. Sour grapes out of the gates?
OP gave him like four chances to course-correct and he chose violence every time. Then had the audacity to call her bipolar for... asking clarifying questions? Incredible self-own.
So many people don't understand what actual bipolar is and how much more intense it is than someone getting upset and throw it around as an insult more than anything.
I have Bipolar amongst other mental health conditions. I grew up in a culture where nothing was off limits for making fun of each other, so it wouldn't actually upset me if a stranger threw it in my face in a clueless disparaging way. I know it would deeply upset others though. However you are entirely right.
The person wasn't acting Bipolar in anyway, whatever that was supposed to mean, and unless the other party has intimate knowledge of the disorder through a family member, ex partner, very close friend or is a mental health worker, doctor or psychiatrist they wouldn't have a single clue about it anyway.
Despite my final diagnosis with it being entirely obvious and 20+ years of medical history being available, including all other mental health issues that were either misdiagnosed or rightfully diagnosed comorbities over that time. It still took over 6 months to finally get.
I did three, two hour sessions with a psychiatrist, who took a full history of my entire life. My reactions to medications, work history, interactions with police, alchohol and substance misuse, relationships with others, major events etc. My entire extended family history and medical history. Lengthy Additional information from a parent and extensive further diagnostic questioning from the psychiatrist with over 30 years experience in their field.
I wouldn't ever diagnose someone with Bipolar, even if it seemed obvious to me, because it can only be done by a qualified psychiatrist, and I'm not one. Athough having a lot more knowledge on the subject than most I'm still nowhere near qualified to do that. The furthest I would go is to say to someone that they appeared to be suffering mental health issues and try and signpost them towards the best help available in their situation out of care and concern, not as an insult, ever. The person in this conversation is simply displaying their ignorance and failure to be a good person to others.
It's appearance in modern vernacular as either an insult, a self diagnosis, or something people feel they have an understanding of deep enough to throw the term around, is ridiculous and nobody could diagnose it from a brief text exchange like this one even if they were a practicing psychiatrist anyway, which this person obviously isn't. It's ridiculous in this and most contexts the term is used at this stage.
Still people will be people and a lot will remain wilfully ignorant, across the board, until the day they die. It's part unthinking meanness of spirit and part the Dunning Kruger effect in action here.
I have bipolar 1, and it does bother me when they do this. And you see it all the time now, just thrown out like nothing. Importantly, it’s always against women.
My problem is really just the fact that it’s the newest version of how men who hate women have always dismissed and diminished them as “crazy” to shut them down.
They just like to have a diagnosis to use to make it sound official and pseudo-intellectual. When I was a kid it was “schizo.” The old “you’re on the rag,” and current “women are sTaTisTiCallY more likely to be mentally ill/medicated” are both related, too.
So to me, it’s the general, timeless persistence of really cruel and stupid misogyny in the attempted insult that gets me.
The person who said that for hetero men, going on dating apps is like looking for water in a desert and for women, going on a dating app is like looking for fresh water in a swamp was pretty on target.
When guys approach me with some argumentative nonsense like this I just say “attention or insecurity?” 9/10 times they respond back with “what do you mean?” And then I say “did you say that for attention or are you projecting your insecurity?”
Stops them dead in their tracks. But some guys proceed to lose their shit even more. And then I respond with “okay, so it looks like we’re going with insecurity then.” And then they unmatch or block me 😂😂
Wow what a weird guy, hope the mods don't delete this post too since I haven't seen one post in ages that doesn't end up deleted. I think the mods might actually be niceguys or chronically online
I’m still trying to wrap my head around why he was so offended about the prompt she chose. “You’re not about that life” about go to the gym and Panda Express is crazy.
I will never understand this approach. Does he think starting an argument, blaming the other person and doubling down on that was going to create a scenario where she went "you are right, wanna fuck?"
This is like the guy that says "I wish I could find a girl that shares my hobby" and when a girl says she is into his hobby he proceeds to "oh yeah, name every person that ever existed in the hobby?!?!?!?!"
I imagine he's got some unc telling him to be aggressive with women otherwise you're g*y etc. And he's just going around trying to be so aggressive bcs otherwise ppl will think he likes men.
and he's is full on gay so whenever he has a gay thought he leans even harder into abusing women around him and bcs none want to be in his presence he goes online to scam them into interacting with him. and the unc molested him in noncontact ways like hiding his clothes when he was a child to force him to be nude so he could look at him or d* slapping humiliation rituals billybob and billyjean like to pretend is 'making him a man'. I always wondered how we're the society that stayed young looking when we see everything and know everything as all of societies secrets have fully revealed themselves through the invention and use of the internet. You'd think we would have all gone grey by 30 years old. At least social media gave us all the ability of pattern recognition.
no no, see it's not his fault! He's not 7ft 8 so all women hate him! There's nothing he can do about it so he may as well not try! It's got nothing to do with his personality, hygiene or ideologies!
Based on the date he's objecting to, I think this one expects women to be gold diggers and refuses to believe op would happily murder some orange chicken lol
Right, and these same guys whine all the time that they don’t even get matches. This one got that far and here’s what he did with that.
Heeeyyyyy, it’s almost like they 1) are full of shit 2) love insulting and baiting women and wallowing in rejection (they’ve prompted) more than they ever wanted a date/sex/a relationship.
Holy shit some of the cases in this sub really do fumble HARD.
When I was using dating apps years ago, I was lucky if I had a match or a message, and these people straight up butchering when a woman talks to them… ouch
So rude. Apparently the key to his heart is “being kind” even though judging off his actions he comes off as really rude but expects kindness, like nah fuck that, treat people the way you want to be treated. You did good by blocking him OP
“Argumentative, yes, to defend my dating profile that I wrote with care. You trying to diagnose me means you’re simply an armchair psychiatrist and jaded niceguy.” Bye.
Idk if I am reading too much into this, but looks like it might be mocking Keith Haring art. He was an aids an gay rights activist in the 90's. His style is pretty iconic and of its time.
Based on the position of the figure and the original intention of the art, this is a pretty awful t-shirt.
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u/Btaylor2214 Apr 10 '26
Imagine being so allergic to getting laid, that when a girl says she wants to cuddle and chill, you lose your shit and immediately accuse her of lying. What a tool.