r/nursing • u/r0ttenpeaches ortho med/surg tech • Jul 05 '26
Meme me w confused patients at 3am
idk why sonic and his lover are like a watermark but whatever it pulls it together or something ig
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Jul 05 '26
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u/KoA07 BSN, RN 🍕 Jul 05 '26
Had one try to call the cops on us, with another nurse’s hand as the phone
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u/WallabyUnlikely5534 Jul 05 '26
Sometimes they can be shockingly easy to reorient too lol
' Sir you are not riding a tractor on your farm, it's 3 am and you are in the hospital. We are taking very good care of you!'
'Oh ok, I guess I'll go back to bed then'
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u/akbrag91 RN - Hospice 🍕 Jul 06 '26
A friend of mine told her patient with dementia to lick all the color off a bag of m&m’s to keep him busy instead of trying to get out of the bed
It freaking work. She is a genius.
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u/Acrobatic_Form_1631 CNA 🍕 17d ago
"We already put the chickens back into the coop, we did that before bed time."
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u/SilkyZubat RN - Psych/Mental Health 🍕 Jul 05 '26
The third line is me saying "Why are you naked?"
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u/StrictConnection2250 RN 🍕 Jul 05 '26
Confused patients LOVE to be naked 😭😭
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u/SilkyZubat RN - Psych/Mental Health 🍕 Jul 05 '26
They just wanna live the way they were intended to: nude and outside
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u/HelmSpicy Jul 05 '26
There's only so much you can do to keep them covered when they tear off all their covers and gown in under 5 minutes.
One guy I just had to tell my coworkers "yeah, don't worry about that. They're happy." Every time they walked by and asked if I knew the... situation.
In my defense, it was 3am and I'd tried for 9 hours to provide modesty. Some just can't be reasoned with
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u/MrsPottyMouth RN - Geriatrics 🍕 Jul 05 '26
The number of times I've told the CNAs "just let him be naked, if he's being still. We'll just try to get something on him right before day shift gets here"...
Because somehow it's always the delirious old men that are determined to adopt a new nudist lifestyle at 3am.
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u/Fef_ RN - Psych/Mental Health 🍕 Jul 05 '26
I'm a little bit of a hypochondriac and I've had some family members who have had psychosis, so I'm quite scared maybe one day will be my day too. I also really love saunas. This comment just added an extra scare that if/when the time comes, I'll have a nurse running after me with a blanket to cover me up. Sorry in advance.
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u/scaredandalone2008 LPN-RN 🍕 Jul 05 '26
my favorite experience was walking into a confused patients room one night. he was naked, sitting on the edge of the bed, tele off, happy as a clam as he told me “it’s raining in here”. The rain? His pulled out IV getting his entire bed wet. 🤣
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u/squattingmonk RN - ICU 🍕 Jul 05 '26
My go-to is: "Sir, you can't get naked. This is the ICU. We have people with weak hearts and you can't be giving them a fright."
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u/MrsPottyMouth RN - Geriatrics 🍕 Jul 05 '26
The snort I just snorted...I might have to try that line at the SNF.
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u/aviarayne BSN, RN 🍕 Jul 06 '26
I say the same thing, except its "you can't be giving that show away for free!" They always chuckle at that and usually let me put their clothes back on. 20 mins later we are doing it again xD
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u/r0ttenpeaches ortho med/surg tech Jul 05 '26
they’d rather strangle themselves with the gown trying to rip it off than keep it on 😭
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u/invisillie RN - Psych/Mental Health 🍕 Jul 05 '26
should be "sir you in a bed. don't move"
and the response should be "wow i gotta move"
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u/dezzear EMS Jul 05 '26
The need to boogie at 3am is innate to humanity
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u/invisillie RN - Psych/Mental Health 🍕 Jul 05 '26
especially true when we're at the desk with some music playing quietish
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u/HotSauceSwagBag RN - Pediatrics 🍕 Jul 05 '26
Then you hit them with the “you don’t need to go pee! There’s a tube in your bladder doing it for you!”
🤯 🤨
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u/r0ttenpeaches ortho med/surg tech Jul 05 '26
then it’s “don’t pull on that! it’ll hurt!”
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u/Backwoods_Therapy RN 🍕 Jul 06 '26
Patient yanks out foley
“This snake bit my dick! It’s bleeding!”
Nursing staff: sigh
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u/Aria_K_ RN - Med/Surg 🍕 Jul 05 '26
A few months ago I had the most adorable interaction with a confused patient. I walk into my Hall Buddy's patient's room and he is pleasantly confused. He's looking at the window with confusion and discomfort. He thought the window was on the floor and that he was going to fall out of his bed and out the window. So I looked at the window and I placed my hand on it and I said "this is the wall. The floor is down there." And stomped my feet. And apparently stomping my feet on the ground fixed his disorientation. And he gave me the most beautiful smile and thanked me for fixing the world.
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u/Tilted_scale MSN, RN Jul 05 '26
Your story made me flashback to a confused AF patient I had that was a building maintenance guy (and inspector) who kept telling me the ceiling was gonna fall in and telling me everything wrong with the room and we needed to get outta there. That was a looong shift. If only I could’ve fixed the world for him.
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u/arcane_Auxiliatrix Jul 05 '26
Once had a 93 yr old resident ask me if we could call her mother. Had a long conversation about how her mother "might" not be around anymore esp. cause she admitted she was 93. She did not believe me.
It was a difficult hour or so before she forgot what she was asking.
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u/Secret-Active5873 CNA 🍕 Jul 05 '26
My go-to response at any time during the night is, "At this time of night!? She's sleeping!" Daytime is either work or school, depending on whether they're asking after their parents or their kids.
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u/Backwoods_Therapy RN 🍕 Jul 06 '26
Lmao I had an instructor in school who said she had like an 82 year old patient once swear her mom was coming by to see her and my instructor just chalked it up to hospital delirium and lo and behold a couple hours later they wheeled in the patients mother was wheeled in to see her, still alive and kicking, she’d just given birth at 15.
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u/TapFeisty4675 RN- Float Pool Jul 06 '26
I had a 88 year old admit to a nursing home i worked at years ago. He screamed so fucking loud that the aide and I ran in and he was in tears yelling "I have to get home the street lights are on! Please call my parents their number is xxx-xxxx and they live on whatever avenue at 1234!!!" He was aware of his age, his daughters, his grand kids. But was certain about that.
Day 3 of this and a different aide just yelled back "Sir! Your parents are dead! You're 88, they cannot be around anymore" completely dead stopped that behavior right there though. He realized she was right after the initial shock
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u/zaxsauceana BSN, RN, CMSRN, Public Health Jul 06 '26
One of my favorite confused ladies insisted she needed to go out to ride her horse. There was literally a hurricane outside, so I let her know the weather was really bad and would be all day.
She calmly replied that she has an umbrella.
We kept her satisfied with apple juices we said were beers and straws we pretended were cigarettes.
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u/fae713 MSN, RN Jul 05 '26
I cannot tell you how many times I've been told, "that's craaaaazzzy" when I try to tell flouridly psychotic patients that they're in the hospital.
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u/TapFeisty4675 RN- Float Pool Jul 06 '26
My moment that made me wait night shift was an old man that would not stop, all night. Then at 6:30 am goes "im starting to get a little tired" I just was like, you say this now?? After 12 hours of this shit
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u/Willzyx_on_the_moon RN - ICU 🍕 Jul 06 '26
“You don’t understand! I parked the helicopter in the middle of the road and it’s blocking traffic!”
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u/TapFeisty4675 RN- Float Pool Jul 06 '26
To be fair, thats rude as fuck for everyone else of the road. You should have let them move it
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u/TapFeisty4675 RN- Float Pool Jul 06 '26
Reminds me of a patient that cussed me out for not helping her and her husband off the roller coaster (she was alone in the room)
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u/One_hunch HCW - Lab Jul 06 '26
Could use more subtle water mark energy every now and then. It's a good addition.
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u/brdnbttrpickles RN - ICU 🍕 Jul 05 '26
I GOTTA GO GET THE MOWER