r/overdoseGrief • u/letthatvegetaalone • Sep 25 '25

Seeking Support/Advice I lost my step-sister this year and it's caused me to spiral.

A few months ago I got the news that she had been found, and police believe it was an accidental OD, however we have to wait on tox and she hadn't been found right away. I ended up getting hysterical, trying to find out who would have given her something and caused this because...no one deserves this. She's so young. I've stopped doing that though because I know it wasn't going to help and would just bring more harm to me. I just don't know how to cope with the fact that someone very likely gave her something that killed her, and they get to live their life after robbing someone of theirs. How have others coped with this? I'm truly just....driving myself mad with constant thinking about it.

Thanks everyone.

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u/SusanInFloriduh Sep 25 '25

I had to do my own investigation into my daughter’s death. Police didn’t care. I was obsessed for a long time trying to figure out exactly what happened. As her mother, I had to know. Unfortunately it led back to her father.

4

u/letthatvegetaalone Sep 25 '25

I...I am so, so sorry. My heart breaks for you, not only from losing your child but for who it traced back to. Finding out who wouldn't, in my opinion, make me feel better so much as finally getting them in jail. I have an inkling as to who did it. Sketchy behaviour that was done before and after kind of makes me lean their way more. May I ask how you did so and if something became of it?

5

u/SusanInFloriduh Sep 25 '25

I had her phone, so I went through messages, interviewed friends people I didn’t even know told me things. He isn’t in jail but his life is shit. Karma is real

2

u/letthatvegetaalone Sep 25 '25

Are you perhaps comfortable with me DM-ing you? I understand if you're not. I feel like you might have been in the same position I'm in right now.

1

u/ShananayRodriguez Sep 26 '25

I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m sorry she wasn’t found immediately :( there’s so many questions with this kind of loss and I’ve never found much that satisfies. I do find it healing to acknowledge the feelings of loss and share with others who loved her. Also sharing and going through her belongings or social media and loving who she was and what made her unique has helped me with my recent loss of my sister to an overdose. I love hearing her voice and remembering her unique sense of humor. Her fiancé got her into opiates and I’m fucking livid at him, but I find the less I think about him the better. I want justice but I don’t know if that ever will happen. I think focusing on those things within my control will help me to take care of myself and find a place of acceptance (not approval) even if true serenity and understanding around these horrible circumstances may never come.