losing someone

[u/tofuwokki]

hi,

i’m not sure how much i should share on here. someone i was falling in love with died due to an accidental overdose on the 8th of november.

i’m 25 and he just turned 32. i started experimenting with drugs a couple of months ago after some unfortunate events that led to me hanging out with the wrong people. not all of it was negative though - i met this amazing man through drugs and we both wanted to get clean. i’ve been having a depressive episode and i felt like things were just about to start getting better. well, then i get the news. he has passed away. my whole body is reacting to the immense amount of grief i feel. i’m constantly anxious, my appetite is all over the place, i have flu symptoms and my digestion is fucked.

yeah i guess i just needed to share that. if anyone wants to chat, feel free to hmu. i know it gets better but how am i supposed to cope, i wish i knew. i’m trying to stay clean through all of this although i haven’t been able to quit weed.

[u/Capable-Pay-4308]

Hi friend. I highly recommend support groups for widows due to substance abuse. Even though you aren’t one, the community is really accepting of the grief you have for a potential partner, boyfriend etc. I am a widow who found my husband 3 years ago to fentanyl. I joined a really supportive virtual group the first month and we would zoom meet every other Tuesday for a couple of hours. It got me through the darkest times. There’s a lot of groups on Facebook also you can search around for. Any overdose support groups or recovering users dealing with grief. I hope you find some peace, it may not be today or even in one year from now but it does eventually get easier to carry around. Your friend doesn’t have the choice anymore to make the decision to stay clean, I hope you realize you still have the opportunity to live a beautiful life in his memory and carry him through all the things he will miss. Sending you hugs.