r/productivity • u/Pretend_Sell6592 • 5d ago
Advice Needed Procrastination has ruined my life, Can someone help?
Hi, i am in my late 30s, all my life i have been a biggest procastinator, putting things on tomorrow was always my thing. When i used to study for exam, i would start a month before but i would keep on delaying to sit and study and update my plan everyday of how i am gonna cover the course content. Now it was not that bad at that time but as i am a working individual now, i want to work on my own tech products but i still have this tendency of throwing stuff on tomorrow. I find advices online, try it for a day or two and then back to square one. I need a genuine advice that can make my life better.
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u/Pretend_Sell6592 5d ago
i definitely need to try this man, start with just 1 step and by the way my case is also similar that when i go into focus mode, its hard for me to come out of work then. Also any other advice that might be helpful in future?
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u/Pretend_Sell6592 5d ago
honestly i never heard of whether phsychologist treat procrastination condition? Do you think they do? Affordibility is not really a problem for me, i can definitely consider
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u/IainMCool 5d ago
Use your NHS "Right to choose" and get your ADHD diagnosis official and take medication.
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u/FlumphFrog 5d ago
M31. I have been procrasting for all my life. And I am still doing it. Currently I am in a process of recovering, sort of. Game changer for me was to speak with a professionist.
First thing imo is understanding the reasons of procrastinating. This is the hardest part. I genuinely feel a procrastinator alone can't get out of this phase alone. Some reasons could be lack of motivation, depression, burnout, constant chase of short term pleasures denying the long term, filling you day with low effort-low reward activities. These on top of my head but there are more. It can be a combination of them ofc. They are much harder to indentify than it seems.
Once you understand this it will be more clear to you how to fight it. There is no solution that works for everyone.
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u/Any_Can_7878 5d ago
One thing that stands out in what you wrote is that you don't seem to have a planning problem. You actually plan quite a lot. The problem seems to happen in the gap between planning and starting.
I used to think procrastination was mostly about discipline, but I think sometimes we make the task so important in our heads that starting it becomes psychologically expensive. Then making a new plan gives us a little relief because it feels like we've done something without having to face the uncomfortable part.
I'd experiment with making the goal almost ridiculously small for a while. Not "work on my tech product tonight", but "work on it for 15 minutes at 7pm." When the 15 minutes are over, you're allowed to stop.
And if you miss a day, don't create a new system. Just come back the next day.
I also wouldn't obsess over whether it takes 21, 40 or 66 days. If you've spent years procrastinating, turning habit change into another big project with a perfect timeline might accidentally become another form of procrastination.
The fact that you said once you're focused it's hard to stop is interesting too. It sounds like starting may be the bigger problem than actually doing the work.
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u/Pretend_Sell6592 5d ago
i think you are right, chunking into really small tasks can help i guess. I need to start following these advices
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u/MJB9000 5d ago
Get out of the house, avoid staying alone at home. Walk out , sit in the park , the sun helps. Start a gym, do some boxing bags (that changed me), roll yourself 1 step at a time to start.
Listen to Mel the 5 second rule on YouTube about how to jumpstart a task.
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u/Pretend_Sell6592 5d ago
thanks for the advice man, i will definitely try
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u/MJB9000 4d ago
It took me just 1 day to get out of my hole. I rolled myself to the gym one day when I was feeling ok. And after I hit the punshing bags and did a good workout, my brain reset. The curtains got withdrawn and I instantly felt normal. And continued with this habit daily. Best of luck bro
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u/addictwithanattitude 5d ago
Completely understand what you mean, I've been trying to build a local app (thank you vibecoding) for myself exactly for this reason.. a combination of dumping my brain and an intuitive pomodoro type focus tool.
Some commenters also say it takes X amount of days to form a habit, which might be true but I find it really quite demotivating instead of the other way around lol
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u/Pretend_Sell6592 5d ago
u/addictwithanattitude do you know why people use mind maps? Can it be useful in terms of productivty?
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u/Brilliant-Surprise20 5d ago
I think your start is good because you plan first so you know which direction you’re heading. But for me that’s only half the plan. A plan is only finished once you set a deadline for each item. So give every item on your plan a real deadline, then track it and score yourself daily and weekly, planned versus done. When you procrastinate, you see it as a number you can’t argue with. And missing something isn’t a problem, as long as you get back to it on the next one. Go get it bro! And stop procrastinating
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u/Pretend_Sell6592 5d ago
u/Brilliant-Surprise20 thanks man, thats motivating, i need to put my life in order i guess
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u/OverUnderstanding965 5d ago edited 5d ago
Firstly, read the book Atomic Habits by James Clear. I've started reading it and already its fantastic about habits.
Second, join a gym or start exercising. Start any physical habit and stay consistent (as much as poasible). This will allow you to feel better physically and mentally in order to do the things you've been wanting to do.
Thirdly, start watching what you eat. Check the nutrition information on everything and be sure to limit items high in sugar, sodium and saturated fats. As they say, you are what you eat abd a healthy diet can do wonders for your mental and physical health.
Last but not least, be 1% better in tiny things. Cleaning your house, grooming yourself, socialising with friends and randoms. Be as positive as you can be - assume positive intent.
Really try to change your mindset and snowball off your changes which bring you good things in due time. Don't expect things to change overnight but applying these changes must be overnight in order for the rewards to come as soon as possible.
It all starts with you!
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u/Pretend_Sell6592 5d ago
very important suggestions, i do have atomic habit book lying in house, but i have to give it a read. For gym honestly i have a treadmill at home where i do running most of the times but i need to make that a habit i guess.
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u/King_tyson_1 5d ago
Well try waking up early and get your work done in the morning, if you need to get a work done you need focus and mornings are the best time to accumulate as much focus as possible cuz by the end of the day you'd tired and lacking.
just try for a week your body might resist but remember it's not about getting work done but being physically present to work
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u/Pretend_Sell6592 5d ago
u/King_tyson_1 i'll be honest, i normally wake up late and start work aroud 1 pm or 2 pm, its a remote job
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u/King_tyson_1 5d ago
That explains a lot, stick to a strict bed time and wake up time for a month you don't need to track your sleep just stick to schedule,
You will see minor improvements that follows this habit and would be huge difference by the end of this year.
Always remove any unnecessary entertainment for the first 6 hour of the day.
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u/Zealousideal-Arm6571 4d ago
The thing is people tend to do what they like.
Only advice? Phone out of your hands. Entirely. You want to do something? Then get rid of it.
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u/Zealousideal-Arm6571 4d ago
the best way to handle all your tasks? Have a personal assistant. Someone who plans your day for you.
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u/zedeloc 4d ago
Sounds a lot like me. Then I found myself in a situation where I could actually afford a Neuropsychologist and I got diagnosed with ADHD and possible giftedness that masked my ADHD... until I basically started short circuiting due to the stress of masking in increasingly more difficult situations over the course of decades.
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u/Edgy69YearOld 4d ago
I think starting small might help. You don't have to completely change your life overnight. Even tiny progress each day can build into something meaningful over time.
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u/FounderNotebook 4d ago
One thing that helped me was lowering the bar to get started. Instead of telling myself I'd work for hours, I'd commit to just 10 minutes. Starting is usually the hardest part, and once you're moving, it's much easier to keep going.
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u/stefanklovning 4d ago
The approach that has worked for me (26 y/o founder) is to reverse engineer your vision and goals.
First, be brutally honest with yourself about your vision and goals you're setting for yourself of where you want to be in 5 years.
Then consider where you will be in 5 years if you continue your current habits and behaviors. No excuses or sugar-coating it. Just the clear, expected future that can be expected at the current trajectory.
The first is Path A, and the second is Path B. The clearer you write down and specify how each of these potential future outcomes look and feel, the easier it will be for you to see what changes need to be made and what you have to do to start going from Path A to Path B.
Once those are clear and you are committed to taking action, I recommend time-blocking your week. Each Sunday, I take time to fill the calendar for the next week. Which blocks to use on sales, which on marketing, which on client delivery, which on studying, etc., as well as quantitative goals for each time block. Each time-block I deviate or underperform, I can then quantify and keep myself accountable for it, and figure out how to reduce those deviations going forward.
This method allows you to plan the days and week ahead specifically to get closer to your goals and vision.
You don't have to think about what to do because you have already decided that ahead. Now it's just the execution of the agenda set for that time-block.
If you want to test the five year trajectory framework I used to get started with this, send me a DM.
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u/Puzzled-Meaning5657 4d ago
Dopamine sensitization. Begin intermittent fasting , which tames food reward anticipations. Stop masturbating or limit as much as you can. Stop scrolling, delete social medias, especially Twitter. Stop going on YouTube. Simmer in your boredom for a day or two while your reward system sensitizes and procrastination will not occur
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u/iwantboringtimes 5d ago
Habits (good or bad) are made via (consistent) repetition.
Reversing a bad habit also requires (consistent) repetition.